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Texas Golf Massacre ( Parody )

@imnotagolftee.bsky.social
172 followers 148 following 529 posts

You haven’t seen the ( world,⠀ ) so you don’t know. You keep going for⠀⠀ ⠀ ( family ) that’s about it ☠︎︎ .ᐟ ⠀⠀ @UnitsNurse.Bsky.social ❤️💜 ( Parody )

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Texas Golf Massacre ( Parody ) @imnotagolftee.bsky.social · 18h
“I know, well if does happen involuntarily I just hope it isn’t when one of my bad memories is circulating over in my brain. You’ve already been through enough and you don’t need that too.” Joel exhales softly and then he smiles “Alright, let’s practice moving between strings six and three.”
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Texas Golf Massacre ( Parody ) @imnotagolftee.bsky.social · 18h
Joel is now feeling smug knowing that he has done it again but he is mostly happy that Stephanie is happy about the possibility of getting a house-trained pet duck. “I think he will absolutely let you get one. Tommy is smitten with you and he will absolutely get whatever you ask of him.”
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Texas Golf Massacre ( Parody ) @imnotagolftee.bsky.social · 19h
Joel makes comfort food that he knows he’d love if he is not feeling the best, which is just a tomato soup with some lightly buttered bread. Joel also made a grilled cheese but only gave Cascina one half and Persephone one and a half. “Okay girls, here comes dinner. I hope you’re both hungry.”
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Texas Golf Massacre ( Parody ) @imnotagolftee.bsky.social · 19h
“Aliya.” Joel thinks about the name choice for a second and then he nods his head whilst smiling. Joel then places a kiss on Persephone’s forehead. “Aliya sounds perfect, Darling. Maybe we should name all our children with rare names. What do you think? I know it’s probably a little flashy too.”
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Texas Golf Massacre ( Parody ) @imnotagolftee.bsky.social · 21h
“You are nothing like him. You will never be anything like him.” Joel is just now caressing Persephone’s hand and exhales softly. “You have been nothing but an incredible mom since day one, Darling. You continue to be. Please stop thinking you’re anything like him because I promise you are not.”
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Reposted by Texas Golf Massacre ( Parody )
ˣ 🩺⠀⠀PERSEPHONE ⠀⠀MILLER⠀⠀ (Parody⠀⠀! ) @unitsnurse.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
❝𝐀𝐭 𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐭 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐲 𝐬𝐨 𝐈 𝐜𝐚𝐧 𝐚𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐬❞ Persephone Miller Lethbridge-Stewart by birth. Miller by marriage. Pediatrician • former UNIT nurse • mother • aunt ♡ @imnotagolftee.bsky.social Doctor Who/ TLOU OC | selective | multiverse FC: Vanessa Kirby
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Texas Golf Massacre ( Parody ) @imnotagolftee.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
Joel just watches as Persephone gives Cascina the medicine and reassures her. Joel then opens up the window so that Cascina is getting constant fresh air “I’ll go start on dinner.” Joel goes downstairs and does exactly that. He makes something light since Cascina isn’t feeling well at the moment.
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Texas Golf Massacre ( Parody ) @imnotagolftee.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
“I wish she was here. She would be so excited about being a big sister again, it’s all she would ever tell me growing up.” Joel smiles and gently places a hand on Persephone’s stomach and rubs it with his thumb “You did, did you? What name for our little one if they are a girl did you think of?”
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Texas Golf Massacre ( Parody ) @imnotagolftee.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
“I know you do, Darling. We all do even if one of us said something silly. We know Darling.” Joel then presses a loving kiss on Persephone’s forehead. “You don’t need to worry about anything, darling, okay? You really don’t need to be stressed or upset about anything, especially right now.”
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Texas Golf Massacre ( Parody ) @imnotagolftee.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
“I did not know that but I do and I am glad I do because that is a really cool fact.” Joel is smiling because he is watching Stephanie playing with the ducks. “I have a really good idea, Stephanie. You should ask my brother for a house trained pet duck for Christmas. I think that’ll be awesome.”
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Texas Golf Massacre ( Parody ) @imnotagolftee.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
Joel has to think about it for a second but then he shakes his head “I don’t think that you should go in my mind, it’s a little messy. You can just let me teach you, it’s easy, I promise.” Joel then picks up his guitar and then he sits Violet down “The first thing I’ll teach you today is simple.”
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Texas Golf Massacre ( Parody ) @imnotagolftee.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
“I’ll go get her some calpol, Darling, it’s likely her last dose is wearing off.” Joel kisses Persephone’s head, then Cascina’s head before getting up from the bed. “I’ll be back as quickly as I can, okay?” Joel then goes and gets the calpol and returns before smiling at Persephone and Cascina.
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Texas Golf Massacre ( Parody ) @imnotagolftee.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
Joel laughs softly and then he gently kisses Persephone on the lips and then on Persephone’s stomach before looking into Persephone’s eyes. “You know. We now have an even number of children, I think that’s is an amazing thing Darling. Do you not?” Joel is now smiling lovingly at Persephone.
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Texas Golf Massacre ( Parody ) @imnotagolftee.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
Joel laughs softly but he also nods his head before placing a kiss on Persephone’s forehead before smiling and then carefully he caresses Persephone’s hair. “I am more than happy, Darling, but I also don’t want that to be the reason you keep the baby because I want you to love them too.”
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Texas Golf Massacre ( Parody ) @imnotagolftee.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
Joel tries his best to deflect because for once he actually remembers his wife’s wishes and instead Joel just smiles warmly at Stephanie before Joel gives Stephanie a big cuddle. “Why don’t you give me some facts about ducks? I know you love giving them and truth be told? I love hearing them.”
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Texas Golf Massacre ( Parody ) @imnotagolftee.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
“You got this. You’ll see because I promise you once you have got the basics you will be amazing from there. You are going to be amazing.” Joel sits Violet down and smiles “Alright, pop quiz. I’m going to tell you a few strings, wait a few minutes and then quiz you. How does that sound, Kiddo?”
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Texas Golf Massacre ( Parody ) @imnotagolftee.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
“Hm, let’s start with guitar lessons. I am pretty good with my guitar which means it’ll be fairly easy for me to teach you. What do you think? Do you like the sound of that?” Joel is now smiling because he is excited to actually teach Violet guitar lessons and he hopes that Violet agrees.
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Texas Golf Massacre ( Parody ) @imnotagolftee.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
“Don’t worry, I won’t let her hear that I think that about myself. She’s already going through enough and knowing this is the last thing she needs, but thank you for thinking about Persephone.” Joel is smiling and he turns his head to look at Stephanie “I just hope she knows how much I love her.”
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Texas Golf Massacre ( Parody ) @imnotagolftee.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
“Do you want daddy to carry you downstairs? He can happily do that.” Joel is now patiently waiting for Cascina’s response, especially because Cascina might be in pain. “Mommy has already put on your favourite cartoon. I think I can hear it. What do you say. Should we both go and watch it?”
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Texas Golf Massacre ( Parody ) @imnotagolftee.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
“Oh it is, is it? I’ll remember that and maybe when you are feeling down I’ll bring out the older brother voice again because I know that you love it.” Joel smiles and returns the kiss to Persephone’s lips a few times as a reward “I bet it’s the authoritative voice. It is that, isn’t it Darling?”
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Texas Golf Massacre ( Parody ) @imnotagolftee.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
Joel nods his head because he actually agrees with Persephone that it wouldn’t be a bad idea if they waited until the three month mark to tell people. Joel then kisses Persephone on the head “We can do that darling. Nobody has to know until you feel ready and until then it will stay between us.”
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Texas Golf Massacre ( Parody ) @imnotagolftee.bsky.social · 12/09/2026
Joel figures this is a stress thing and he places a hand over Violet’s to calm her and now Joel is looking at Violet with a look of pity and then he smiles small at Violet. “How about we change that, hm? We can go and do things and discover what you do and do not like. How does that sound?”
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Texas Golf Massacre ( Parody ) @imnotagolftee.bsky.social · 12/09/2026
Joel actually looks at Victoria when she is settled on his shoulder after she gave it a little tap and then Joel smiles between Victoria and Stephanie. “She does, though it still surprises me that anyone can adore me, I am not the easiest man to love, even you would know that Stephanie, right?”
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Texas Golf Massacre ( Parody ) @imnotagolftee.bsky.social · 12/09/2026
“I’ll let the school know she isn’t going to be in for the rest of this week. Do you think she’ll be better by next week?” Joel is now pressing a loving kiss on Persephone’s head “Do you want to go downstairs and watch a movie so that she can get downstairs, Darling. Would you be okay with that?”
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Texas Golf Massacre ( Parody ) @imnotagolftee.bsky.social · 12/09/2026
“Maybe? I also think that he will blame himself forever if that happens, so hopefully that never happens.” Joel then smiles small at Persephone. “Especially because Violet and Tommy both have already been through enough. I don’t want either of them going through anything else again.”
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Texas Golf Massacre ( Parody ) @imnotagolftee.bsky.social · 12/09/2026
“I know, it was really dumb that Ellie said that and she shouldn’t have said that but I promise you that you are not your father, Darling and you’ll never be.” Joel is now gently caressing Persephone’s hair and gently kisses Persephone on the side of her temple “I love you and I am here for you.”
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Texas Golf Massacre ( Parody ) @imnotagolftee.bsky.social · 07/09/2026
“You’re a wife and a mom, that’s a start, right? You can go from there.” Joel smiles at his niece and then gives Violet the biggest cuddle that he can manage without actually hurting Violet “You are more than just what they say. I know it and everyone else that loves and cares about you does too”
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Texas Golf Massacre ( Parody ) @imnotagolftee.bsky.social · 07/09/2026
Joel smiles between Stephanie and Victoria but Joel also shakes Victoria’s little leg whilst smiling happily but then Joel looks at Stephanie. “She is very cute, and marvellous. I don’t think that I have ever seen a spider that loves humans or being held by them like Victoria does, Stephanie.”
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Texas Golf Massacre ( Parody ) @imnotagolftee.bsky.social · 07/09/2026
Joel is still a little bit hesitant but Joel trusts Persephone and because of that he goes and gets some water for Cascina before returning to Persephone. “Here you go, Darling. How is she?” Joel said and is then gently rubbing Persephone’s back up and down comfortingly. Joel also smiles small.
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Texas Golf Massacre ( Parody ) @imnotagolftee.bsky.social · 07/09/2026
Joel actually agrees, especially because he remembers exactly how he was like after he had lost Sarah. Joel presses a delicate kiss on Persephone’s forehead and smiles. “He will be okay, Darling, I promise. I’ll tell him how stupid he is being and hopefully he’ll wake up and smell the roses.”
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Texas Golf Massacre ( Parody ) @imnotagolftee.bsky.social · 07/09/2026
“You aren’t going to come across as bad, my love, I promise and this is a good thing because Ellie needs to learn that somethings aren’t okay to do.” Joel is now caressing Persephone’s hand hoping that it’ll comfort Persephone for a while “I love you so much Darling and I know Ellie will too.”
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Texas Golf Massacre ( Parody ) @imnotagolftee.bsky.social · 03/09/2026
“I know this might sound really dumb, but maybe you could wear headphones when things get to loud and overwhelming for you?” Joel is really trying to think of ways that he can help Violet but he is also doing his best not to make Violet feel like this is something she should be embarrassed about.
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Texas Golf Massacre ( Parody ) @imnotagolftee.bsky.social · 03/09/2026
Joel is enjoying the display of affection that is being shared between Stephanie and Victoria but at the same time Joel nods his head in response to Stephanie’s question. “I would like that.” Joel puts his hands out for Victoria but he also makes sure to cup her hands slightly so she doesn’t fall
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Texas Golf Massacre ( Parody ) @imnotagolftee.bsky.social · 03/09/2026
“You are supposed to be resting, Darling.” Joel gently says to Persephone but at the same time he isn’t exactly stopping Persephone from examining Cascina. “You know that you work with the best doctors, right, my darling?” Joel is now patiently waiting for Persephone to finish her examination.
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Texas Golf Massacre ( Parody ) @imnotagolftee.bsky.social · 03/09/2026
Joel knows exactly how Persephone feels right now and he can even understand the regret Violet will feel if anything bad happened to Tommy. “I’ll talk to him and get his head on straight, once I tell him clearly what it is doing to the people he loves then hopefully he’ll open his eyes clearly.”
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Texas Golf Massacre ( Parody ) @imnotagolftee.bsky.social · 03/09/2026
“You can be disappointed, it doesn’t make you a bad mum, okay? I’m disappointed in her as well.” Joel then presses a kiss on Persephone’s forehead. “Ellie did something bad and you are doing the right thing by putting the behaviour right, I promise.” Joel then gently takes Persephone’s hand.
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Texas Golf Massacre ( Parody ) @imnotagolftee.bsky.social · 29/08/2026
“He’s never going to hurt you ever again, okay? I just want you to know that you are safe now and he will never get to hurt you again.” Joel is having to take some slow and deep breaths. “I’m really sorry that he did all that to you, kiddo, but he is never going to hurt you like that again.”
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Texas Golf Massacre ( Parody ) @imnotagolftee.bsky.social · 29/08/2026
Joel can honestly understand why Victoria might like to hide in the dirt and rose bushes in the garden because he imagines for a spider that is luxurious. “I think that it is really cute that she does that and since she comes out of hiding for all three of you that means she sees you as family.”
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Texas Golf Massacre ( Parody ) @imnotagolftee.bsky.social · 29/08/2026
Joel is concerned about how unwell Cascina is and feels Cascina’s forehead, quickly realising she is running a temperature. Joel picks up Cascina and carries Cascina to bed. “I’m going to get a doctor to come look after you too, okay? You don’t have to be scared, they’ll make you feel better.”
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Texas Golf Massacre ( Parody ) @imnotagolftee.bsky.social · 29/08/2026
“I can see your intentions are pure, my darling and you don’t have to worry because Tommy will see that too. He forgets he isn’t immortal, or getting any younger.” Joel gives Persephone a reassuring smile and Joel presses a kiss on Persephone’s hand “Thank you for looking out for him, darling.”
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Texas Golf Massacre ( Parody ) @imnotagolftee.bsky.social · 29/08/2026
Joel nods his head in agreement because he agrees with Persephone’s that Ellie is setting a bad example for Jerry and Joel gently places a kiss on Persephone’s forehead “We will get this behaviour set right, Darling, I promise and I don’t want you worrying about Jerry ever learning that behaviour”
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Texas Golf Massacre ( Parody ) @imnotagolftee.bsky.social · 24/08/2026
Joel is nodding his head whilst listening to Violet but at the same time he knows exactly what Shaw put Violet through and his eyebrows press together. “Didn’t he hurt you many times? I’m not trying to sound like I am judging you, please don’t think that I am. I am just trying to understand you.”
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Texas Golf Massacre ( Parody ) @imnotagolftee.bsky.social · 24/08/2026
“Such a small little spider and yet she has such an awesome backstory and I think that she will always be an awesome little friend too.” Joel is smiling whilst gently petting little Victoria “Where does she hang out when she isn’t rested and chilling out on someone’s shoulder? I’m very curious.”
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Texas Golf Massacre ( Parody ) @imnotagolftee.bsky.social · 24/08/2026
“No, don’t be silly, drawing is for everyone and it isn’t something that Ellie can keep for herself.” Joel then places a kiss on the top of Cascina’s head. “If you have an urge to draw then you do that, okay? You are going to be an amazing artist. Daddy doesn’t know much but he knows this, okay?”
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Texas Golf Massacre ( Parody ) @imnotagolftee.bsky.social · 24/08/2026
Joel is gently rubbing Persephone’s stomach to help her but at the same time Joel is also listening to Persephone and then presses a loving kiss on Persephone’s lips. “Okay Darling, I’ll have a serious word with him and tell him he can’t keep putting himself at risk. Would you be okay with that?”
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Texas Golf Massacre ( Parody ) @imnotagolftee.bsky.social · 24/08/2026
“Of course we can. We express our disappointment in Ellie and maybe take away her tablet privilege?” Joel is now rubbing his wife’s lower back and looking into her eyes. “Whatever you feel like is right, my love but just know that I am with you through it all. I will let you talk aswell, darling”
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Texas Golf Massacre ( Parody ) @imnotagolftee.bsky.social · 20/08/2026
Joel crouches down every time with a hand lightly placed on his little girls back and he smiles proudly before placing a kiss on Cascina’s forehead “You are going to be a wonderful artist someday, sweetheart. Oh and look at how beautiful Mayo-neigh’s feet are. Aunt Stephanie is going to love it.”
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Texas Golf Massacre ( Parody ) @imnotagolftee.bsky.social · 20/08/2026
“I don’t know. I heard her say she is going to take Tommy somewhere, something about a big battle and that they’ll be back for dinner.” Joel slightly lifts his shoulders and shakes his head “I don’t really know what that means but she did say that they’ll be back in time for dinner, don’t worry.”
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Texas Golf Massacre ( Parody ) @imnotagolftee.bsky.social · 20/08/2026
“That is pretty serious, Darling, I think that deserves a few smacks on her behind. No, not enough to hurt her just enough that she understands it was bad.” Joel is now looking at Persephone “I know you might struggle with the butt spanks so I can do them for you, if you’d like me too.”
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Texas Golf Massacre ( Parody ) @imnotagolftee.bsky.social · 20/08/2026
Joel actually likes Victoria and he thins that she is a very cool spider especially because he is touching one of her little spider legs gently. “Are we sure she is just an average everyday spider? She is so calm and chilled out. I really expected I would have been hissed at by her before now.”
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