iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

its getting colder outside isn't it? :(

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suppose i should try to sleep.... paper work is a pain when you hardly know your own skills :/

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Starshine so bright I offer this prayer Shine your light in the boundless night. Polaris you are, not near, but afar The thought of the music is yours evermore

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The wails forget not the star shine so bright. The depths of lament this flea does feel. Hollow and froze the cold aches mine bones wondering, oh wondering about the future untold This winter approaches rapid and shattered.

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The book part written The story in tatters The tears, they fall The chapters, untold Yet songs still roam For wishes unknown Polaris of light, Hold on to your might Let not the chaos tamper your sight Forever, the heart shine, loved deep in the night. The howl of this flea it cries in the night

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and be what you desire as what was meant to be.

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But for Polaris, continue will time. Find some rest, Polaris that shines ever so bright and may one day, a thought be spared for this flea in the night This flea with selfish wish, begs spirits beyond simply for Polaris, to fulfill its own wish. Polaris of light continue to shine

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Polaris of light, forget this flea just simply grow, what you were meant to be. Shine your radiance throughout the boundless night and show unto all your loving light The flea may change, to something some day, evolve or devolve, from the coming days, but love unchanged

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Grow and radiate your light and your might The realms below quaking in sight not out of fear, not out of spite simply from love, in evenings twilight Dawn may break, the storm subsides, but forever will the flea, think of the star shine.

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Spring to melt the frozen snow I do not know what flowers may grow but forever supreme shall be the light of a rose Shine on with your might, Polaris of light The selfish whims of this flea that can swim, drowning in sorrow begs you simply shine...even without him

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Winter arrives and things may die but forever will, Polaris shine Spring may approach, for rebirth anew, I wish it swiftly for you This traveler through, the frozen night, I wish simply for Polaris' light Polaris will shine, mine fate unknown, care not do I, just love for the starshine

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Winter's storm, surrounding me more, the thoughts of Polaris keeps me warm. Polaris think not, of this selfish plea for I'm simply that of a flea Be beautiful and shine, Polaris divine Shine your light, through the silent night

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Know not do I, the march of time, nor the end, of the boundless climb. The mountain ever scaling My failings clear Polaris of Night, continue to shine Silent twinkling, i may disappear but forever my heart shine, none can compare May we grow and repair that which cannot compare.

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Though that be selfish and against wish of realms and immortals beyond forever will i wait for Polaris of night Silent through the pollutional blight i look still, for Polaris' light, Starshine, Starshine, forever so bright live on with life and your hidden might

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Eternal would I accept, the trade of mine soul's regret, My cycles of carnation, forever beyond My items immaterial, yet to possess all of it, all of it, I'd trade again and again, for Polaris of night

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Winter's Silent Shine The air grows cold As time grows more bold I look at the rain drops, them waiting to crystalize to flurries untold. I think of Polaris, that precious light shining through the endless night

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huh.....almost made it to 4 hours this time :/

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YouTube video by Chill Cartoon Vibes

i can feel myself floating and zonking out at the same time....maybe my body and mind are exhausted enough to finally sleep.... have a good night everyone....may chat in a few hours www.youtube.com/watch?v=upd6...

youtube.com

Finally, some peace...

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Jeanine 💙 @madammaleficent.bsky.social · 17/09/2026

holy fuck.....could my lack of sleep be showing what my actual brain problems are? >.> Depersonalization-Derealization Disorder huh? it fits a lot of things....treated with similar meds, has similar symptoms....don't want to self-diagnose, but a lot of the things that cause it are from severe trauma

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Reposted by Tati

If your business requires me to create an account, verify my email, accept seventeen cookies, download an app, and solve a captcha just to buy one thing, I no longer want the thing.

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but hey....at least i ate something....and have some form of fuel in my system....that's gotta be something right?

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4 fun opinionated facts 1. Chef Boyardee Mini Ravioli is basically the human version of low grade dog food 2. its a repulsive comfort food, but it is a comfort food 3. its ready to eat from the can 4. It still doesn't have much taste....

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dude....doordash....you just NOW sent me the verification texts :| i asked for those like 2 hours ago and went with Instacart and got better and saved more money figure your app out on both phone and computer!

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I'd trade the thousand life times before and my future karmic cycle.... deep down....i don't want to really go to NC...i want to stay here in VT....hope against impossible odds for a pretty unlikely future... can't undo words, actions, and lies though....they stick... no matter how much you regret

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oh you don't want to cry in a public space? you should 100% play at least the first 5 minutes of Clara Obscura: Expedition 33....won't cry from that :P

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also finally got some sleep....about 3 hours....not much....but its something i guess

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Bless the driver that followed the request and brought me a mango smoothie along with some groceries He's legit AF Tip your Instacart drivers when they do good shit like that yo (or door dash when the app works but i was struggling with it for about 2 hours)

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The future doesn't take care of the present, but the present does take care of the future

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also oof to your phone disappearing 4 minutes ago but ya know you brought it in with you

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