Gozan @ijagozan.bsky.social · 21/09/2026When picking a dentist, use the same rule as when picking a barber; pick the one with the worst teeth 001
Gozan @ijagozan.bsky.social · 11/09/2026Trump's plan is to make a meme coin named 5000 and give everyone one $5000 coin 011
Gozan @ijagozan.bsky.social · 28/08/2026So this week a head of state and someone who was in Home Alone 2 died. Unfortunately they were two different people 030
Gozan @ijagozan.bsky.social · 26/08/2026FFS, Death, you can't just keep killing 80-year olds until you hit the right one 010
Gozan @ijagozan.bsky.social · 05/08/2026Descartes did his best work at night. Hence his famous saying, "I think, therefore 1 AM" 010
Gozan @ijagozan.bsky.social · 17/06/2026If countries had slogans, Scotlands would be "We hated them first!" 010
Gozan @ijagozan.bsky.social · 23/04/2026Cleanliness is next to godliness if you have a really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really abridged dictionary 041
Gozan @ijagozan.bsky.social · 08/04/2026An important key to understanding the mindset of the Iberians is that out of all of Christendom, they were the only ones to go "I'm a gonna name MY kid Jesus" 110
Gozan @ijagozan.bsky.social · 13/03/2026In the shadows, signing secret orders: - I sure wish I could read what I'm signing 030
Gozan @ijagozan.bsky.social · 20/02/2026A summary of US history: In the 18th century the American colonies rose in rebellion under the slogan "No taxation without representation", and since then the US has been split into a side seeking to make sure everyone is represented in governance, and a side who thought they fought to end taxation 020
Gozan @ijagozan.bsky.social · 19/02/2026"Maybe the real treasure was the Friends we made along the way?" -NBC executives evaluating their IPs 010
Gozan @ijagozan.bsky.social · 15/02/20261) Rogue. Drain my essence, mistress! 2) Shelob. Suck me dry, queen! 3) Wonder Woman. Tie me up, goddess! 4) The Borg Queen. She can disassemble her body, so on vacations she can travel as luggage 110
Gozan @ijagozan.bsky.social · 07/02/2026The first wine reviewers: Person A: We need to create some terminology. How would you describe this liquid? Person B: Crisp. Person A: what Person C: I was thinking ...dry. Person A: WHAT 010
Gozan @ijagozan.bsky.social · 20/01/2026With the amount of ketamine Musk is doing, he must be so disassociated from reality everything must seem like a video game. He could probably be gaslit into thinking he can quicksave and go on a rampage ...Who am I kidding, Musk doesn't play enough games to know what quicksave is 010
Gozan @ijagozan.bsky.social · 19/01/2026I think that we should stop worrying about selling technology to China that their military might use against us in a worst-case scenario, and instead sell them technology so that their military could use it against us in a worst-case scenario 020
Gozan @ijagozan.bsky.social · 07/01/2026Guys I found out why Trump think Greenland and Venezuela are vital to the security of North America 110
Gozan @ijagozan.bsky.social · 12/11/2025Pros and cons of traveling to the US now: Cons: You have to scrub your social media and phone to not get detained and deported Pros: If he dies when you are there, it'd be like being in Brazil when they win the World Cup 030
Gozan @ijagozan.bsky.social · 12/11/2025Putting up a new post so the guy who likes one of my posts each time I like one of his posts has something to like 130
Gozan @ijagozan.bsky.social · 15/09/2025Why did no one tell me 50 Cent is 50. Think of all the jokes we could have made 030
Gozan @ijagozan.bsky.social · 14/09/2025So on Youtube I got recommended Chumbawamba's "The Day the Nazi Died" - the resistance is alive and everywhere 040
Gozan @ijagozan.bsky.social · 15/08/2025How is this the most rap name involved in the Kendrick-Drake saga 040
Gozan @ijagozan.bsky.social · 07/05/2025They should decide it by an Eucharist eating competition. Whoever can eat the most Christ becomes pope 020
Gozan @ijagozan.bsky.social · 02/05/2025They should make Gabe Newell president. Only way to avoid World War 3 010
Gozan @ijagozan.bsky.social · 17/04/2025Five romance movies etc: 3-Iron July Rain Kamikaze Girls Chungking Express The Important Thing is To Love 030
Gozan @ijagozan.bsky.social · 27/03/2025Decided it was time to change. Turned my life around 180. Forgot I was on radians. Think I'm gonna vomit. 020
Gozan @ijagozan.bsky.social · 14/02/2025Happy Valentine's to those who partake. Personally, I feel that the expectation of romance lessens the impact. I much prefer to be romantic on days when you don't expect it, like Halloween or 9/11 010
Gozan @ijagozan.bsky.social · 09/12/2024Some Wikipedia pages whose title has pleased me greatly recently: Witches of Warboys Master of the Female Half-Lengths Bitch Wars 020
Gozan @ijagozan.bsky.social · 29/11/2024"The jerk store called, and they're running out of you." - Childish - Nonsensical "The jerky store called, and they're running out of you." - Ominous - Savoury 010
Gozan @ijagozan.bsky.social · 23/11/2024Not saying anybody should do crimes, but if you do, it'd please me greatly if you could leave on the scene a ziploc bag inside a ziploc bag marked 'Evidence A' inside a ziploc bag marked 'Evidence C' 000
Gozan @ijagozan.bsky.social · 23/11/2024Good fences make good neighbors, electric fences make electric neighbors 000
Gozan @ijagozan.bsky.social · 16/11/2024The main reason Trump got re-elected is simply because a lot of Americans thought he has a big brain. ...Especially that one guy in Pennsylvania. 000
Gozan @ijagozan.bsky.social · 15/11/2024You want high IQ people working 80 hours of week for 0 pay? Best I can do is 80 IQ people working 0 hours for high pay 000