ichris.topher @ichristopher.bsky.social · 10/12/2025Bruce probably definitely played Wordle on the batcomputer atleast once 000
ichris.topher @ichristopher.bsky.social · 09/10/2025*walking up to the Human Torch or whatever his name is idk with an unlit cigarette in mouth* “hey man thanks for being an avenger or whatever hey can I bother you for a sec-“ 001
ichris.topher @ichristopher.bsky.social · 08/10/2025Yeah I’m fine! I just wore a light sweater but didn’t realize how fucking cold it actually is 🤣🤣because I’m a stupid fuckin idiot who never learns from his mistakes oh my god okay I’m going inside fuckthis 000
ichris.topher @ichristopher.bsky.social · 23/09/2025I’d probably love grapes but I haven’t figured them out yet 000
ichris.topher @ichristopher.bsky.social · 09/07/2025*old man faints in the park* Lady: holy shit is there a doctor?? pigeon on the park sign: fuckkk that’s my bread guy pigeon beside him: which one? the original pigeon: the guy, on the ground. I said guy, didn’t I? pigeon beside him: oh yeah right third pigeon showing up: dudeee our bread guy😭 010
Reposted by ichris.topherAnthony Clark @nedroid.com · 21/06/2025Why does this soap label look like it should be the first book in a trilogy called “The Ryver of Shaedows” 1584434293
ichris.topher @ichristopher.bsky.social · 20/06/2025It the clown: Pennywise. Me: aggghh get away from me!! The clown from it: Pennywise. Me: you’re not real! You’re not real! Scary clown from it: can you fuckin put Pennywise please 010
ichris.topher @ichristopher.bsky.social · 19/06/2025WW2 buff: gun gun gun gun weapons weapons bombs Me: what about the Holoc- WW2 buff: tanks tanks BIG tanks, very cool tanks 000
ichris.topher @ichristopher.bsky.social · 19/06/2025I want to do so well in life that at some point, a portal opens up behind me, where a bunch of Christopher’s walk out and they all look cool and unique, and they ask me to join their council. 020
ichris.topher @ichristopher.bsky.social · 17/06/2025Jeremy Strong, known for “Succession” and “The Apprentice, set to portray “giraffe toy in the background of the vids sometimes” in untitled “ichris.topher” Disney+ series. Source: @movieupdatesandmore 000
ichris.topher @ichristopher.bsky.social · 12/06/2025“I fear I actually do this 😭😭” cool, change yourself 010
ichris.topher @ichristopher.bsky.social · 11/06/2025Barista: dark roast black for…Clyde orange ghost from pac-man: yep 000
ichris.topher @ichristopher.bsky.social · 10/06/2025idiot friend: ahaha how do you like my new “door mat”? me, injuring my lower back from tripping over a fucking Daredevil toy: haha I get it 020
ichris.topher @ichristopher.bsky.social · 06/06/2025Star Wars alien: goo ka ka jupo licka lickey muon! Star Wars droid: 6301-74&-7292-zuu zuu! Star Wars regular guy: and then what happened 😭😭 000
ichris.topher @ichristopher.bsky.social · 06/06/2025“Okay great! Lemme get a pen!” *grabs pen but actually doesn’t because the pen slips out of my fingers and rolls under the couch because I’m a fuckin idiot who can’t hold on to anything and just ruins everything* 000
ichris.topher @ichristopher.bsky.social · 30/05/2025server: anddd did you want the sauce on them or on the side? me: side please-hey are you EVE from that wall-e movie? server: …no aha why would- me: *googles plant* just wait oneeeee sec 000
ichris.topher @ichristopher.bsky.social · 30/05/2025drive-thru: hello what can I get for you? Whale shark out of water: … drive-thru: …hello? Whale shark: hold on, I don’t know yet 021
ichris.topher @ichristopher.bsky.social · 29/05/2025I think Harry Potter would’ve been better if he was named Dooby instead of Dobby but idk I’m not transphobic 000
ichris.topher @ichristopher.bsky.social · 28/05/2025*alien using vending machine before leaving Earth* “What the fuck, they don’t got Hǔççod?” 010
ichris.topher @ichristopher.bsky.social · 28/05/2025*arriving for my evening shift as a 911 operator on Sept. 11 2001* Coworker that just clocked out: you just missed the rush aha 030
Reposted by ichris.tophermerr-itt came from outer space @merrittk.com · 27/05/2025doctor: well mr. yoda, we fixed the language center of your brain. you should talk totally normal now yoda: thanks dude 104988735
ichris.topher @ichristopher.bsky.social · 28/05/2025do you think Stuart Little would have a Cameo page if he was real 011
ichris.topher @ichristopher.bsky.social · 25/05/2025We should look at aloe vera the same way Wakanda looks at vibranium 010
ichris.topher @ichristopher.bsky.social · 01/05/2025We don’t make fun of hammerhead sharks enough 000
ichris.topher @ichristopher.bsky.social · 29/04/2025car detailing must feel great if you’re a transformer 000
ichris.topher @ichristopher.bsky.social · 28/04/2025“I get so embarrassed after I sneeze too loud ahaha” TikTok people: yeah you def got Gregory YaYah Syndrome :((( I have it too 010
ichris.topher @ichristopher.bsky.social · 26/04/2025*posting vid I thought would bang* “Fuck I thought that woulda bung” 040
ichris.topher @ichristopher.bsky.social · 24/04/2025cat: meow dog: woof cow: moo Matt Murdock: fine I’ll be daredevil again but istg this it 😭😭💀 010
ichris.topher @ichristopher.bsky.social · 05/04/2025I feel street-tier superheroes would roll their ankles more 030
ichris.topher @ichristopher.bsky.social · 05/04/2025“…you do realize-“ actually that’s okay. Don’t finish your sentence. Go ahead and die 020
ichris.topher @ichristopher.bsky.social · 30/03/2025Do the Marvel fans know that there will be more actors in that movie 110
ichris.topher @ichristopher.bsky.social · 29/03/2025I hate reels that are screen-recordings of other reels. It starts scrolling on its own and I feel I’ve lost control for about 3 seconds 010
ichris.topher @ichristopher.bsky.social · 24/03/2025“_____ would never!” actually yeah i think _____ could do that. I really do. I think _____ could not only do it but also do it multiple times without ever being caught. But I guess you got picture with ____ at Comic-Con 2018 so I guess they’re just the best human being ever 010
ichris.topher @ichristopher.bsky.social · 23/03/2025“homosexuality is NOT natural!” they scream from the rooftops, as if they are not one Red Bull away from being Godzilla’s aborted fetus 050
ichris.topher @ichristopher.bsky.social · 22/03/2025Virgin Mobile has to stop starting their promo-texts with “Hey Virgin-“ because I always think it’s my dad 060
ichris.topher @ichristopher.bsky.social · 12/03/2025One whiff of a smelling salt would kill Daredevil 030
ichris.topher @ichristopher.bsky.social · 27/02/2025Ben and Jerry ice cream guys: hey fuck that orange prick huh? Yeah? Haha yeah fuck him Everyone with a phone: *drops to fuckin knees* god forgive me for ever eating Chapmans 020
ichris.topher @ichristopher.bsky.social · 26/02/2025Has anyone actually won a fuckin Samsung tv from roll up the rim 010
ichris.topher @ichristopher.bsky.social · 16/02/2025Elmo with a cigar: maybe I’ll have to kill ya Kermit! If ya keep runnin ya mouth! Kermit with a gun: let’s draw. And I don’t mean with crayons you red fuck Jim Henson’s intern: I’ll just leave the coffee by the door sir sorry 050
ichris.topher @ichristopher.bsky.social · 16/02/2025Sheldon on tv: bazinga Alien friend with me: dudeee no way Me: what? alien friend: that’s a slur dude. Big one Me: … Alien: maybe not here but yeah 060
ichris.topher @ichristopher.bsky.social · 11/02/2025Did you guys run around with the lights off while throwing socks at each other that you brought from home once in a while or was that just my school 150
