iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

Carrie @iamcarrie.bsky.social · 6h

Little sist gave me 7 days of meds earlier (she's keeping the others), so I've just sorted my meds for the week.

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Carrie @iamcarrie.bsky.social · 7h

Going to try and wind down as my head is spinning rn. This is the 0% cider I am trying

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Carrie @iamcarrie.bsky.social · 8h

And now there is a car parked on the pavement/main road outside my flat. That isn't suspicious?

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Carrie @iamcarrie.bsky.social · 8h

Got back from Aldi just before and have just been cleaning the fridge because it was super gross. Had to take various items of "food" out, the shelves out, spray, dry, etc 🙈 Ready meal in the microwave

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Carrie @iamcarrie.bsky.social · 9h

Freaking out. I've just walked to the side road to meet my sister. People in a car with a note pad and discussing stuff.

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Carrie @iamcarrie.bsky.social · 9h

I've remembered to get my bag for life out for Aldi. This is peak adulting tbh. Denise is due in about 10 mins

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Carrie @iamcarrie.bsky.social · 11h

Went for a decent length walk in the park with my friend and my 2yo godson this morning. Been hiding away. I've felt really low and not coping well yesterday and today. Going to try and snuggle under my weighted blanket. Little sist is taking me to Aldi later. Hope you're all ok?

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Carrie @iamcarrie.bsky.social · 20h

Morning. I didn't wake til just before 5, which makes a nice change. Woke up feeling the same, unfortunately. Friend said we can go for a walk this morning. She'll message me later when she and little Sam are ready

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Carrie @iamcarrie.bsky.social · 02/10/2026

I've got a foot mask on and a sheet face mask on. The latter means I'm currently trying to read and post without glasses on. I have had varying degrees of success with this in the past.

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Carrie @iamcarrie.bsky.social · 02/10/2026

The latest Lisa Jewell book in audiobook form is on Borrowbox for the library. I reserved it the other day and it estimated that I would get it May 2027! Yet, today I have had a notification that it is available for me.

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Carrie @iamcarrie.bsky.social · 02/10/2026

Kallax building friend is fine for a walk instead of building. Not got concrete plans yet but will either be tomorrow afternoon or sometime on Sunday when I'm not at church. Little sist is taking me to Aldi when quiet again tomorrow late afternoon.

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Carrie @iamcarrie.bsky.social · 02/10/2026

Just pulled a box of bulbs out of the kallax in the lounge and it was the right type for the one in my lounge that has been flickering for the last few days. Must play the lottery. So easy. It's always that particular bulb in the lamp and not the other type. Weird.

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Carrie @iamcarrie.bsky.social · 02/10/2026

Ah, great. The neighbours are talking about me again

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Carrie @iamcarrie.bsky.social · 02/10/2026

I love my job but it puts a lot of stress on me. I'm hoping it isn't my job causing whatever these "episodes" are. My job also means I can afford to live as UC + a small amount of PIP does not go far. I'm concerned I'm going to lose it.

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Carrie @iamcarrie.bsky.social · 02/10/2026

Messaged my friend who was going to put up another kallax unit for me this weekend. Asked if we could do that another time as I'd really like a walk and company to be able to do that. I think I'm more in need of a walk and the unit can be done another time

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Carrie @iamcarrie.bsky.social · 02/10/2026

Catch you later. Hopefully I'll fall lucky and fall asleep while under my weighted blanket and never wake up again...

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Carrie @iamcarrie.bsky.social · 02/10/2026

Feeling very down today that this is what my life has become again. I can try and occupy myself each day but for how long and why? It's really shitty that I can't manage a walk in the park or even a trip to a coffee shop. I'm going to snuggle under my weighted blanket

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Carrie @iamcarrie.bsky.social · 02/10/2026

Just sitting down to watch Celebrity Traitors

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Carrie @iamcarrie.bsky.social · 02/10/2026

Hair is dry, thank goodness. Reopened the lounge window for some fresh air as I'm not sure I can manage getting out at all today. Going to try and read shortly. I started this book - The Shadow Carver by Nadine Matheson that I got signed at Harrogate this summer

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Carrie @iamcarrie.bsky.social · 02/10/2026

I'm going to pop the kettle on for a caramel latte and dry my hair. Extra Q has me wanting to settle and snooze but I can't because of wet hair. This was not very well planned

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Carrie @iamcarrie.bsky.social · 02/10/2026

Washed my hair 💪🏻 I will have to dry it shortly 😞 I have, however, also changed into clean clothes. I'm wearing a smock tunic and leggings. The tunic is supposed to be a crinkle type design but I think it just looks like it needs a good iron 🙈

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Carrie @iamcarrie.bsky.social · 02/10/2026

No you're peeing yourself laughing at the local news reporting on court cases

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Carrie @iamcarrie.bsky.social · 02/10/2026

Messaged my brother yesterday as I do periodically to check he's alive and to make sure his address hasn't changed (he and Tyler share the same birthday 14th October so want to be able to send a card). No reply. He better not have changed his number. He hadn't last month

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Carrie @iamcarrie.bsky.social · 02/10/2026

Agreed with little sist that today's tasks are washing my hair and sorting my clean laundry

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Carrie @iamcarrie.bsky.social · 02/10/2026

Still not over my Alexa whispering to me in the night. Like some kind of horror film

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Carrie @iamcarrie.bsky.social · 02/10/2026

My hair is super gross but I'm sure I only washed it the other day. I might have to try and muster the energy to do that today. Ugh.

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Carrie @iamcarrie.bsky.social · 02/10/2026

I must have whispered at one point when I asked Alexa what time it was during the night and she flipping whispered back. So fecking freaky

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Carrie @iamcarrie.bsky.social · 02/10/2026

I feel like although I was up stupidly early again that I didn't wake as many times last night for the second night in a row.

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Carrie @iamcarrie.bsky.social · 01/10/2026

I'm going to head to the kitchen for my night Q and then try and read in bed. Praying for decent sleep 🙏🏻

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Carrie @iamcarrie.bsky.social · 01/10/2026

I've not taken any prn diazepam today and boy do I know it 🙈 I try to use other ways of coping first and use the diazepam as a last resort. It's hard to strike the balance. Managing a proper nap for the first time in a while defo helped me get through today.

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Carrie @iamcarrie.bsky.social · 01/10/2026

Trying to chill on the sofa in the lounge with the window open. Erm, someone message the weather that it is October now and this is unseasonably warm and outrageous. Neighbours aren't on the other side talking about me atm, so will try and stay in here for a little bit

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Carrie @iamcarrie.bsky.social · 01/10/2026

I also had this cool gift delivered at the same time. Anyone owning up? Thanks!

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Carrie @iamcarrie.bsky.social · 01/10/2026

I had a craving for Iced Gems after watching Bake Off this week, so a friend sent me some

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Carrie @iamcarrie.bsky.social · 01/10/2026

So, my body is sparkly clean but it might be a hat wearing day if I have to pop out tomorrow at all 🙈

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Carrie @iamcarrie.bsky.social · 01/10/2026

Right, I'm summoning the energy to have a quick shower to try and ease my skin crawling with some body scrub.

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Carrie @iamcarrie.bsky.social · 01/10/2026

I feel like having a shower. I am struggling as usual with that kind of stuff but when I use my body scrub on my arms, it helps with the skin crawling sensation very briefly. I know that is odd

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Carrie @iamcarrie.bsky.social · 01/10/2026

Heidi messaging me makes me realise that there are a fair few people (friends as well as family) that might miss me if I were to die. I hate that it feels like a legitimate option to escape the spies and controllers b/c I don't want to set out to hurt those I love.

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Carrie @iamcarrie.bsky.social · 01/10/2026

I've got a couple of ready meals left to use up. I am starving (thanks increase in quetiapine and also my shitty diet lately with minimal decent food). I think I will zap one now.

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Carrie @iamcarrie.bsky.social · 01/10/2026

Heidi (15) messaged to see if we could go out soon. I would love that but it wouldn't be safe while I'm being followed etc. I just said I'd love to but I'm unwell* atm and message her in a couple of weeks re what we can do - bowling, cinema, food, etc. Feel like a shitty auntie rn *I'm not

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Carrie @iamcarrie.bsky.social · 01/10/2026

Just cleaned the piggy cage and hoovered the lounge (kind of lol). A couple of new enrichment type toys/treats, which should be fun for them and also me watching. I am not putting the clean laundry away today as planned. Done way too much and feeling quite wobbly

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Carrie @iamcarrie.bsky.social · 01/10/2026

I'm going to try and read but really I'm hoping to fall asleep and not wake up. No doubt that won't happen, so I'll catch you all in a wee while x

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Carrie @iamcarrie.bsky.social · 01/10/2026

Friend just messaged to ask if I'd done the piggy cage or put away my mahoosive pile of clean laundry. I haven't. Felt quite proud before that I'd managed the other stuff re bins and corner shop but now I feel shit because I haven't done what I had planned.

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Carrie @iamcarrie.bsky.social · 01/10/2026

Finished my first diamond painting before. Brought my recycling bins back to the back of the building, took out some rubbish to the grey bin at the back and popped to the corner shop for bread. Shattered lol. That's me for the day now. Panicky

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Carrie @iamcarrie.bsky.social · 01/10/2026

Going to play on my Switch instead of doom scrolling. I'll change to diamond art and audiobook after the radio breakfast show finishes at 10. Catch you later

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Carrie @iamcarrie.bsky.social · 01/10/2026

Took my morning meds around 7am. This included Day 2 of the increased dose of my morning quetiapine. I hope it gets easier as there is no way I could make it out to work like this

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Carrie @iamcarrie.bsky.social · 01/10/2026

The vicar at my new church has emailed to see if I'd like to join a home group. I v.much would like to do so. Fellowship and study in a smaller setting is something lovely. I'm pleased that he has asked tbh. It seems positive that they try to involve people and get them settled

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Carrie @iamcarrie.bsky.social · 01/10/2026

Not me signing up for another trial of Kindle Unlimited (3 months free) so that I can read a load of cheesy clean Christmas romance books over the next few months lol

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Reposted by Carrie

geoffrey @parsnip.bsky.social · 01/10/2026

there are moral arguments against the death penalty in its ideal form but in real life you never need to get there. the prior question is "can the state be trusted to end the life only of the rightly convicted without torture?" and the answer is no

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