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Garic Goblinhewer

@historydwarf.bsky.social
387 followers 333 following 1.2K posts

A dwarf in a sea of Internet trolls. My account is pure, like fresh fallen snow on Christmas. If your first interaction with me is a DM, please do not expect a response.

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Garic Goblinhewer @historydwarf.bsky.social · 13/10/2026
Obviously intelligent and driven, I’m just concerned that she didn‘t have a childhood. Maybe I worry about nothing.
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Garic Goblinhewer @historydwarf.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
That’s ok, I didn’t need my soul anyway.
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Garic Goblinhewer @historydwarf.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
Colloquially known as The Venetian Plot Twist.
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Garic Goblinhewer @historydwarf.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
Oh yeah, I just caught this one a few days ago. Harry Mack can always be counted on for an absolute banger.
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Garic Goblinhewer @historydwarf.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
First game in like three months.
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Garic Goblinhewer @historydwarf.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
Oh, I see why. Letitia James was named special prosecutor for the Cornell case. And since James led the civil fraud inves against Trump, he has to take the opposite side.
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Garic Goblinhewer @historydwarf.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
It always bothers me that “Grinch” and “Scrooge” are always used pejoratively even though both were redeemed in the end. Meaning it doesn’t matter how much you change, some will always remember you at your worst.
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Garic Goblinhewer @historydwarf.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
It was such a nice looking prop they had. Legible, colored nicely.
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Garic Goblinhewer @historydwarf.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
Making crockpot chicken pot pie with my garden potatoes. Makes me wonder what color the end product will be.
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Garic Goblinhewer @historydwarf.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
If I could sleep through the night for once, that would be…phenomenal.
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Garic Goblinhewer @historydwarf.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
I wasn’t around during the most famous dictator run. I suspect it will be similar this time. Worldwide relief and cheering. Disbelief and grief among supporters. Some anger that true justice could not be served. And a propaganda burst claiming heroic circumstances.
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Garic Goblinhewer @historydwarf.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
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Garic Goblinhewer @historydwarf.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
“Call a horse-drawn ambulance carriage…but not for me!”
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Garic Goblinhewer @historydwarf.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
Republican senators claim to want an end to the Iran conflict but still vote down the war powers acts that might do so. Because they know they will get re-elected anyway.
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Garic Goblinhewer @historydwarf.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
Not sure why they didn’t use “Loser” by Beck. Maybe they couldn’t get the rights.
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Garic Goblinhewer @historydwarf.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
Me after the waiter takes our order: “And another bowl of chips please.” And as he glances at the nearly-full bowl already on the table, “Trust me.”
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Garic Goblinhewer @historydwarf.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
I tried to grow some decorative corn for fun this year. Results are…lackluster.
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Garic Goblinhewer @historydwarf.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
So that’s who has been eating my blackberries.
Several bees nibbling on a ripe blackberry on the bush.
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Garic Goblinhewer @historydwarf.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
Remember the negative international repercussions in 1984 when Ronald Reagan jokes about the Soviet Union, “We begin bombing in five minutes?” Trump asks, “When do I blow the entire nation [of Iran] up?” and the world shrugs. “Just Trump being Trump again”, they chuckle.
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Garic Goblinhewer @historydwarf.bsky.social · 19/09/2026
There will still be reporting, it will just be unchallenged positive news about the administration. No probing questions, just basically a cut and paste of the approved White House narrative.
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Garic Goblinhewer @historydwarf.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
Since Trump has banned major news outlets from the White House, they should start reporting some crazy stuff. ”Allegedly, the president was caught by aides in the Oval Office wearing a duck costume and quacking.” “Reportedly, Trump has announced he plans to switch parties to Democratic Socialist.”
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Garic Goblinhewer @historydwarf.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
I assume Mary Trump could still join. After all it says ”Trumps” plural. You could still have one.
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Garic Goblinhewer @historydwarf.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
Coincidentally Liv and I were just chatting about this last night on WhatsApp, how many imitators there are and the poor saps who fall for them.
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Garic Goblinhewer @historydwarf.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
Rep. Maria Elvira Salazar Is upset because Hispanics voted for Trump and his aggressive immigration crackdown - that he explicitly campaigned on - and that he’s executing. Who would have thought?
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Garic Goblinhewer @historydwarf.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
My genealogy research has led me to Captain Edmund Bacon (1641-1704). Possibly the most delicious of my ancestors.
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Garic Goblinhewer @historydwarf.bsky.social · 14/09/2026
The same people who swore Mitch McConnell was dead are the same people who swore Bibi Netanyahu was dead and maybe we shouldn’t listen to non-experts on the internet as much as we do.
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Garic Goblinhewer @historydwarf.bsky.social · 14/09/2026
It’s not weird, it’s actually normal to eat boxed macaroni and cheese standing by the stove directly out of the pot to avoid having to wash an extra bowl, I’m telling myself.
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Garic Goblinhewer @historydwarf.bsky.social · 09/09/2026
I just got an email telling me Microsoft Copilot is now available in CarPlay. So now instead of relaxing with the radio, or decompressing before and after the drive to work, you can just work in your car too.
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Garic Goblinhewer @historydwarf.bsky.social · 06/09/2026
My dog, eying the tomato prize from the garden this morning.
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Garic Goblinhewer @historydwarf.bsky.social · 05/09/2026
There are always some issues I assume everyone would agree with. Unfortunately I am always disappointed.
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Garic Goblinhewer @historydwarf.bsky.social · 04/09/2026
It’s fascinating how, even though I have not lived in Vermont since I was 18, some things apparently stick with you forever.
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Garic Goblinhewer @historydwarf.bsky.social · 04/09/2026
Man, I do enjoy Portillo’s. The Italian beef with both sweet and hot peppers.
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Garic Goblinhewer @historydwarf.bsky.social · 02/09/2026
I want to manifest a big slice of cheesecake.
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Garic Goblinhewer @historydwarf.bsky.social · 01/09/2026
I just saw a clumsy attempt to alter a 1688 French map that calls Lake Ontario, “Lac America”. There are no limits to which they won’t go to justify their orange leader’s actions.
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Garic Goblinhewer @historydwarf.bsky.social · 29/08/2026
No, I’m fine, just tired.
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Garic Goblinhewer @historydwarf.bsky.social · 28/08/2026
Pits are the best.
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Garic Goblinhewer @historydwarf.bsky.social · 27/08/2026
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Garic Goblinhewer @historydwarf.bsky.social · 27/08/2026
Appropriately, the mnemonic device for the Great Lakes is now SHAME.
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Garic Goblinhewer @historydwarf.bsky.social · 26/08/2026
Those look like the Super Sweet 100 variety that I grow each year. Pretty hardy and plentiful.
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Garic Goblinhewer @historydwarf.bsky.social · 26/08/2026
Me: “I think I just need a few days to process Dolly’s death, and I’ll be ok.” Tim Curry: ”Well, actually…”
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Garic Goblinhewer @historydwarf.bsky.social · 25/08/2026
Now Dolly too, as my week wasn’t bad enough already.
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Garic Goblinhewer @historydwarf.bsky.social · 24/08/2026
At least Sarah Palin was elected.
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Garic Goblinhewer @historydwarf.bsky.social · 24/08/2026
Not real? Where the hell was I born?
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Garic Goblinhewer @historydwarf.bsky.social · 23/08/2026
My daughter let me know she got a seasonal job at a haunted house. I see I have done well.
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Garic Goblinhewer @historydwarf.bsky.social · 22/08/2026
You know, all of this might be pretty cool if it wasn’t for all the people.
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Garic Goblinhewer @historydwarf.bsky.social · 22/08/2026
Yep, sounds like they purposely sabotaged it, knowing what Carney’s reaction would be.
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Garic Goblinhewer @historydwarf.bsky.social · 21/08/2026
She did, but she was still a natural beauty. Her early pictures were just ethereal.
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Garic Goblinhewer @historydwarf.bsky.social · 20/08/2026
I just received this mailer today. Probably the best thing I have gotten all week.
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Garic Goblinhewer @historydwarf.bsky.social · 20/08/2026
I misread this as “14th century” and was amazed. I guess I’m still amazed, just differently.
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Garic Goblinhewer @historydwarf.bsky.social · 20/08/2026
A simple French bread, fresh from the oven. I think they probably turned out ok.
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