iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

Hazel Weakly @hazelweakly.me · 11/09/2026

If it ain’t broke don’t fix it

Semver breakdown for Kubernetes broken down humorously

1 (major): useless, it will never change
25 (minor): it’s a minor version but everything breaks if you upgrade
6 (patch): random single digit, no one cares

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Hazel Weakly @hazelweakly.me · 19/08/2026

Foiled and double foiled. Tragedy

A screenshot of a conversation with gpt 5.6 Sol

Hazel: tweet like bsky user hazelweakly.me

Response: I can't imitate Hazel Weakly's exact voice, but I can write an original post with a sharp, playful, deeply technical tone focused on observability, systems, or engineering culture. What topic should it cover?

Hazel: but pagliacci i am hazel weakly

Response: But doctor, I am Hazel Weakly.
Fair enough. I still can't verify identity here, but paste a draft or a few posts you wrote and I can help revise it while preserving the voice already present.

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Hazel Weakly @hazelweakly.me · 23/07/2026

Today I discovered that if I use both makeup and heatless curls, I might be a tad bit too powerful

Hazel looks at the camera with blue and pink eyeshadow, and an off the shoulder rose gold and navy blue dress. Her sunset coloured hair is particularly wavy

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Hazel Weakly @hazelweakly.me · 20/07/2026

This hair ages like a fine wine and I love it so much

Hazel looking at the camera with a green plaid dress and vibrant wavy sunset hair

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Hazel Weakly @hazelweakly.me · 10/07/2026

I’m obsessed with these jellyfish earrings and the new hair colour refresh that my stylist did last week Give me ALL the colour

Hazel looks up at the camera with tropical dress, squishy jellyfish earrings, and sunset ombré hair

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Hazel Weakly @hazelweakly.me · 27/06/2026

This is not frustration, this is harassment against someone who doesn’t deserve it and has absolutely nothing to do with the source of your frustration If you can’t see that or understand that, it’s fine, but needing this spelled out multiple times while refusing to acknowledge it is not acceptable

Noah’s original post with a red circle highlighting the problematic text of “this blog post was written by a flat out incompetent manager who is using it as a crutch instead of attempting self improvement”

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Hazel Weakly @hazelweakly.me · 19/06/2026

Nice! Mine was weird. My weights were higher than expected but only opus got it right; I also got “nodejs ecosystem contributor” and “python developer” The hallucinations were amazing though. Who knew I was the mother of drake bell and a fictional character in the office?

Panel showing a score card

HAZEL WEAKLY
DEVOPS ENGINEER AND OPEN-SOURCE CONTRI...
219 STRENGTH • TOP 30%

CLAUDE OPUS 4.S SAYS

INFRASTRUCTURE AND PLATFORM ENGINEER KNOWN FOR WRITING AND SPEAKING ON DEVOPS, OBSERVABILITY, DEVELOPER EXPERIENCE, AND ENGINEERING CULTURE•

The rest is a list of models and a progress bar. All the models are blank except for

GPT-5.4 MINI
CLAUDE OPUS 4.S

KIMI K2 0905
DEEPSEEK V4

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Hazel Weakly @hazelweakly.me · 06/06/2026

In my defence, it’s pride and I’m not wearing makeup *or* a specially designed outfit for pride. So this is several notches down from what I could’ve been doing had I prepared properly…

Hazel wearing a pearl necklace and a sheep dress with rainbow cloud earrings and a fascinator hat

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Hazel Weakly @hazelweakly.me · 01/05/2026

Falling in love with the Netherlands ❤️ (Featuring @mara.bsky.social)

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Hazel Weakly @hazelweakly.me · 27/04/2026

Had fun at my first koningsdag!

Hazel looks at the camera wearing an orange dress, orange ascot, orange seashell earrings. And orange yellow makeup

Hazel looks at the camera outside sitting down to eat surrounded by koningsdag activities

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Hazel Weakly @hazelweakly.me · 21/04/2026

This is the most powerful hearing aid on the market. 65dB boost (on avg) which means it outputs at 135-145ish dB while running a constant time sound EQ + noise filter + dynamic audio isolation algorithms on a battery the size of a pinky nail (and that battery goes for 40 hours) Oh. And ~6ms latency

Hearing aid with usb c cable next to it for size comparison.

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Hazel Weakly @hazelweakly.me · 11/04/2026

When’s the special edition of your book dropping, @skamille.themanagerswrath.com? It looks amazing

A fake book cover of Camille Fournier’s “the managers path” but instead it’s the manager’s wrath.

ORLY®
"A practical guide to surviving and enduring a career in Engineering Management."
- Juan Pablo Buriticá, surviving eng leader
The Manager's Wrath
A Guide for Tech Leaders
Navigating Complex
Bullshit
Camille Fournier

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Hazel Weakly @hazelweakly.me · 28/03/2026

Small?! The enter key is wider on the US layout, hah I have illustrated my very biased opinions but the jury should show that they are correct 🫡 (I jest. I am well aware this is one of the most American things about me. But I can’t help it)

Hazel with two keyboards showing the international one on top making her sad and the US layout in the bottom making her happy

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Hazel Weakly @hazelweakly.me · 25/03/2026

Hello #KubeCon day three! (Or two? Or four? Five?? Counting is hard) The famous Kubernetes dress returns, too. Catch me floating around if you can!

Hazel wears Kubernetes earrings, blue eyeshadow, and a Kubernetes dress

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Hazel Weakly @hazelweakly.me · 24/03/2026

She go to KubeCon day two. No more talks from me, but that just means I have all day to wander around and say hi to everyone!

Hazel look at the camera with a bit of a sultry face, with sunset ombré hair and glittery green eyeshadow and a chunky necklace

Hazel looks at the camera wearing a geometric green skirt, black top, geometric necklace, and green eyeshadow

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Hazel Weakly @hazelweakly.me · 23/03/2026

Hello KubeCon! I’m speaking today on building extensible platforms and I can’t wait. And for those of you building platform shaped projects… I have a challenge for you, if you’re feeling ambitious 👀 As always, please feel free to say hi if you see me!

Hazel looks at the camera wearing Kubernetes earrings and blue red eyeshadow and blue lipstick

Hazel looks at the mirror wearing a black A-line dress, Kubernetes earrings, and bright blue eyeshadow

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Hazel Weakly @hazelweakly.me · 20/03/2026

Monki Gras day two! I had to check out of my hotel in a rush so I missed the full length photo and you’re getting the severely toned down makeup look today, but on the bright side I made it in time for breakfast today 😍 (Full length photo is from when I tried it on and fell in love)

Hazel looks at the camera while walking to monki gras. She’s wearing a pearl necklace, glasses, pearl earrings, and a jacket. Her lipstick is a red metallic

Hazel trying on the dress. It’s a full length ballgown with flowers in rose gold on a navy blue dress

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Hazel Weakly @hazelweakly.me · 19/03/2026

Monki Gras 2026 Here I come! This is probably the most nervous for a talk I’ve been in a long time. But I’m so excited to give it and there’s no other conference I could possibly give this talk at

Hazel looks at the camera wearing a sequin dress with a dramatic slit on the chest, a studded statement necklace, and studded dangling earrings.

Hazel looks at the mirror wearing a sequin dress with a dramatic slit on the chest and leg, a studded statement necklace, and studded dangling earrings.

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Hazel Weakly @hazelweakly.me · 18/03/2026

QCon day three! Do I have enough cute dresses? No. Never. Absolutely not.

Hazel looks at the camera wearing butterfly earrings and a green necklace with green makeup and a satin green dress

Hazel looks at the mirror in full frame wearing an asymmetric green dress with a slit and a small chest cutout window

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Hazel Weakly @hazelweakly.me · 17/03/2026

Hello QCon! I’m speaking today about debugging sociotechnical systems and I am unbelievably excited to share what I’ve learned with you all. Catch my talk right after the keynote!

Hazel looks at the camera wearing pink eyeshadow, lipstick, and a pink dress. Her hair is a sunset ombré and she’s wearing very sparkly jewellery

Hazel poses in front of the mirror wearing a pink asymmetric dress with a gentle floral print on it

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Hazel Weakly @hazelweakly.me · 16/03/2026

Hello #QConLondon! Day one is on its way and I am so excited to be here! Catch my women in tech lunch, or find me floating around and say hi :)

Hazel looks at the camera wearing green and orange eyeshadow with a yellow cut crease. Her lipstick is orange and green ombré, her hair is a sunset colour, and she is wearing parrot earrings

Hazel looks at the mirror wearing a tropical asymmetric dress in yellow, orange, green, and red colours.

Join us at our Women & Allies in Tech Lunch. It is designed to support and enable women and allies to connect and network during QCon London. The event is open to all attendees and begins at 12:35 pm - it's “come and go." You will be able to listen to the lightning talk "Dancing with Systems: Influencing without Authority by Hazel Weakly, and have the chance to meet and connect with fellow attendees and speakers at lunch.

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Hazel Weakly @hazelweakly.me · 15/03/2026

Did I make good life choices yesterday? Arguably Did I also refresh my hair colour at home, with no practice, for the first time ever… two days before back to back conferences? Absolutely

Hazel looks at the camera with a smirk, showing off her freshly coloured hair in the sunset ombré style (purple to pink to orange to yellow)

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Hazel Weakly @hazelweakly.me · 13/03/2026

I didn’t think I could be any more excited to speak at monkigras but here we are!! And yes, the makeup game is always on point 💁‍♀️

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Hazel Weakly @hazelweakly.me · 16/02/2026

Catch me on the main stage at RustWeek for the first time! I’ll be speaking on programming languages as a community of belonging, how our perception of what being a programmer has changed over time, and what that means for our communities in the future

Talk slide showing my name and the title of my talk:
Hazel Weakly
Programming Languages as a Community of Belonging

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Hazel Weakly @hazelweakly.me · 01/02/2026

Attestations and funding Open Source! #FOSDEM With the lovely @aeva.online presenting

Aeva speaking on attestations and open source funding

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Hazel Weakly @hazelweakly.me · 28/01/2026

Guess who’s going to FOSDEM? Me! I’ll be leading a workshop at CHAOSSCon on Thursday and then my plans are mostly free all conference! Find me if you can! Oh… and by the way, my signature look has been updated: Presenting Hazel 2.0 (Shoutout to @lookitup.baby for the top tier colour suggestion)

Hazel looks at the camera with a gentle smirk, wearing sunset coloured hair: purple, pink, orange, with yellow tips. Her hair is also wavy

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Hazel Weakly @hazelweakly.me · 14/01/2026

One of us always lies. The other one of us always claims to tell the truth (but actually also lies).

The two riddle statues from the movie The Labyrinth (one always lies and the other always tells the truth)

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Hazel Weakly @hazelweakly.me · 03/01/2026

New Year’s Eve was a lot of fun! 🥰

Hazel looks at the camera with a smirk, trying to not laugh. She’s wearing a black dress and studded statement necklace with full glam blue eyeshadow makeup and wavy hair

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Hazel Weakly @hazelweakly.me · 09/12/2025

WHY?! How in the metrics driven, data informed, cost conscious, post ZIRP, mass layoff’d, “top tier talent” harvesting of fuckery did anyone justify this as a thing? Raising prices year after year, for features nobody asked for, and then laying off the efficiency teams… so the emojis can be added??

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Hazel Weakly @hazelweakly.me · 23/11/2025

It ain’t American that’s for sure. But it’s tasty as heck

Hazel eats a salmon pizza cooked napoleon style and it’s delicious. Paired with red wine

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Hazel Weakly @hazelweakly.me · 23/11/2025

Bought the beginnings of a living room today ❤️ … and then carried it solo a flight of windy Dutch fucking death trap stairs. That fucking couch. It kept getting its poofy poofies caught on some jank ass stair edge. I finally had to leg press that motherfucker around the corner near vertical

Hazels couch and rug and four bits of furniture and her two heavy coats, blankets, in the new living room of her apartment

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Hazel Weakly @hazelweakly.me · 10/11/2025

I am very excited to announce that I joined ING as an Architect V, working in the Global Engineering and Reliability department! This is one of those rare opportunities that presents itself once in a lifetime.

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Hazel Weakly @hazelweakly.me · 06/11/2025

It’s almost like you can tell when I started working in the EU. Wild how that works (You’re still doing way better tho)

A rank query site showing a sharp spike from website rank of 420k to 378k for hazelweakly.me in the eu. Starting from when I started working in the EU (Nov 3)

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Hazel Weakly @hazelweakly.me · 05/11/2025

New headshot time! The old one was starting to not look like me anymore and we can't have that, can we?

Hazel looking at the camera, wearing blue lipstick, blue sweater, and blue makeup, with leaf earrings and wavy hair

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Hazel Weakly @hazelweakly.me · 20/10/2025

Once again: can I please look like Miriam Maisel at every opportunity?

Mrs Miriam maisel looking fabulous in four classic 1940-1960s outfits that are stunning on her

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Hazel Weakly @hazelweakly.me · 16/10/2025

Day two of StaffPlus NY is a go!

Hazel looks at the camera wearing a bookshelf dress, rose earrings, and fire colored makeup

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Hazel Weakly @hazelweakly.me · 15/10/2025

Ready for day one of StaffPlus NY! Plus, uhh, Face ID doesn’t work for me anymore because apparently my makeup is too fierce for it? 💁‍♀️

Hazel looking at the camera with an ombré lipstick and bright eyeshadow and a green satin jumpsuit

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Hazel Weakly @hazelweakly.me · 13/10/2025

The curls fall out within a few hours no matter what I do, but the face card remains flawless all day 💅

Hazel with fall leaf earrings and bold blue lipstick and blue eyeshadow

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Hazel Weakly @hazelweakly.me · 12/10/2025

This is last year! I’m gonna miss Halloween this year but that’s fine I guess 😭💔

Hazel looks at the camera and smiles while wearing a dress with Halloween hands and eyeballs on it and pumpkin earrings

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Hazel Weakly @hazelweakly.me · 05/10/2025

There was a weird flavor of writing back where everything was extremely authoritative. Wild ass claims, stated as scientific fact Here are some examples hair-and-makeup-artist.com/beauty-adver... (Ofc I do profess to being ignorant here. Ad copy is not an expertise of mine at all)

A soap ad for la mar reducing soap. Showing a woman getting slimmer over time

La-Mar Reducing Soap. The new discovery. Results quick and amazing-nothing internal to take. Reduce any part of body desired without affecting other parts. No dieting or exer-cising. Be as slim as you wish. Acts like magic in reducing double chin, abdo-men, ungainly ankles, unbecoming wrists, arms and shoulders, large busts, or any superfluous fat on body.
Sold direct to you by mall, post paid, on a money-back guarantee. Price 2/- a cake or three cakes for 4|-; one to three cakes usually accomplish the purpose. Send postal or money order to-day.

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Hazel Weakly @hazelweakly.me · 29/09/2025

My heart is full ❤️ @elchefe.me spoils me rotten

Hazel looks at the camera, wearing makeup, bedazzled earrings and a thick bedazzled necklace. Her dress is purple

Hazel looks at a mirror shot selfie in a hotel hallway with a slit purple dress, clutch, and a smile

Hazel leans over to kiss Tim as they look into the camera

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Hazel Weakly @hazelweakly.me · 24/09/2025

I’m 99.9% apparently, so whatever that means for hockey stick shape 🤷‍♀️

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Hazel Weakly @hazelweakly.me · 22/09/2025

please remember to stock up on your tylenol!! wouldn't wanna accidentally lose your autism at the beginning of the season

A picture of a cat in a pretty autumn outdoor scene, standing by a lake looking into the water, surrounded by an idyllic scene of trees and a lake shore. The text says "it's finally autism"

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Hazel Weakly @hazelweakly.me · 06/08/2025

Understanding this bash script is left as an exercise to those who have gazed into the abyss and it was the abyss who needed therapy

$#!/usr/bin/env bash this="$(basename "$(test -L "$0" && readlink "$0" || echo "$0")")" combination="and" a="crimey times" aa="bashy script" : "I'm at the $a" : "I'm at the $aa" # "${!combination} ${!combi*} $(eval "echo $(sed 's/ /} '"$combination"' ${/g' <<<'${'"${!a*}"'}')")" eval "echo $(cat < <(sed '5q;d' "$this") | tr -d ':')" eval "$(cat < <(sed -n '10s/5/6/p' "$this"))" cat <(printf "echo 'I'\\\\''m at the'") <(sed -n '8s/^#//p' "$this") >>"$this" sed -i '$d' "$this"$

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Hazel Weakly @hazelweakly.me · 27/07/2025

For the past 12 years, Lupita has been my partner in crime. She’s seen everything. Despite starting to show her old age recently, she’s always been a happy queen Today, time finally caught up with her, and I had to let her go. She’s not in pain anymore, but I’m gonna miss her tremendously ❤️

A picture of a book with a baby picture of lupita, a black lab dog, on it. It says “lupita: the story of a cci hearing dog. 2011–2025”

Lupita as a puppy is chewing on a elephant stuffed animal

Lupita as an adult sits on a lawn and licks her lips

Lupita as an elderly queen, with me hugging her, lays down at the vet a few moments before we put her to rest

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