iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

jude paw ham recipes 🔞 @glazedhams.bsky.social · 16/09/2026

i don't think there's a solution for this, incidentally, it's the way i've felt my whole life and i've more or less accepted that it's just always going to be a part of who i am and that part of the human experience is just going to be out of reach forever. i just like to vent sometimes

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jude paw ham recipes 🔞 @glazedhams.bsky.social · 16/09/2026

i toyed with the idea that maybe this is just how i am. because sexuality is a spectrum, right? but if that's so, shouldn't that mean i don't have a problem with it? that isn't the case. i'm not happy with whatever is going on with me. it feels wrong. *i* feel wrong. i don't feel human!

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jude paw ham recipes 🔞 @glazedhams.bsky.social · 16/09/2026

it's because there's something wrong with me. i don't know what it is, but i guess it has always been the case. something about me is just made wrong, and that makes it impossible for me to feel human connection. i can send it out, but i can't receive it

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jude paw ham recipes 🔞 @glazedhams.bsky.social · 16/09/2026

sometimes i think i project the image of JP being such a rascally horndog because i, myself, have been lately feeling kind of not very human. like i can connect with others physically, but they can't connect with me. physical intimacy feels like a one-way street. not because of them, mind you

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jude paw ham recipes 🔞 @glazedhams.bsky.social · 12/09/2026

im doing my best, but i dont think im supposed to be here

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jude paw ham recipes 🔞 @glazedhams.bsky.social · 06/09/2026

you look in the mirror, and you see a weak old waste of flesh who's only getting older and weaker. can't even die correctly. pathetic.

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jude paw ham recipes 🔞 @glazedhams.bsky.social · 06/09/2026

i really shouldn't be here anymore. i kinda messed that up, too, i guess

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jude paw ham recipes 🔞 @glazedhams.bsky.social · 06/09/2026

but it's also just that i'm generally not very good at much of anything. even the things i do somewhat competently, i still find a way to fail. i can't stay consistent, i collapse under the pressure. it's just my nature. i am a natural failure.

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jude paw ham recipes 🔞 @glazedhams.bsky.social · 06/09/2026

part of that isn't my fault. sometimes, people get a false impression of who i am. they expect things of me that i never could have given them. i'm not a stoic. i'm not strong. a person who expects those qualities of me has only themselves to blame when they see i'm actually a soft weakling.

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jude paw ham recipes 🔞 @glazedhams.bsky.social · 06/09/2026

i am so intimately acquainted with falling short of what is expected of me . i don't think i know what it feels like to exceed anyone's expectations... i don't think i have ever done that. i have only ever disappointed

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jude paw ham recipes 🔞 @glazedhams.bsky.social · 31/08/2026

most of the bad things that happened ot me are things i'm ultimately grateful for, because they made me into the person i am. you might say they made me stronger, even. but some strengths, i can live without

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jude paw ham recipes 🔞 @glazedhams.bsky.social · 31/08/2026

first person to invent selective and targeted brain trauma is gonna be a very rich mf because i would pay ANY price to wipe certain memories from my brain

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jude paw ham recipes 🔞 @glazedhams.bsky.social · 24/08/2026

absolutely, i can't even imagine how stressful that must have been

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jude paw ham recipes 🔞 @glazedhams.bsky.social · 24/08/2026

you're an average working american, we exist in the healthcare system to subsidize the lives of the wealthy and the elderly. that's what our health insurance does. it's not for our own wellbeing. sorry you had to find out like this.

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jude paw ham recipes 🔞 @glazedhams.bsky.social · 24/08/2026

sorry, i'm not laughing AT you, i'm laughing at the karmic comedy of thinking any working american citizen that isn't a millionaire would have "good" insurance. like. is this your first day on earth. have you been asleep the past 50 years. do you just not read your policy when you sign up for it.

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jude paw ham recipes 🔞 @glazedhams.bsky.social · 24/08/2026

"i don't understand, why am i paying all this money if it's not covered, i thought i had good insurance" well. you don't. LOL. no one with a medium income below 500k in the USA has good insurance. sorry you had to find out this way, we actually are here for our organs and labor.

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jude paw ham recipes 🔞 @glazedhams.bsky.social · 24/08/2026

healthcare sucks. mental healthcare, doubly so. i get it. these industries are designed to oppose your attempts at self-help and grind you down into a good little paypig for your capitalist overlords. believe me, i empathize. but do NOT take that out on me. i'm just doing a fucking job

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jude paw ham recipes 🔞 @glazedhams.bsky.social · 24/08/2026

like why are you yelling at ME about the fact that YOU haven't met your deductible, and didn't bother to check that before you called. taps the fucking sign.

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jude paw ham recipes 🔞 @glazedhams.bsky.social · 24/08/2026

"i want those 20 minutes of my life back" well i want your life to end so i guess we both suffer, huh

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jude paw ham recipes 🔞 @glazedhams.bsky.social · 19/08/2026

im not gonna, but man, it would be so worth it

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jude paw ham recipes 🔞 @glazedhams.bsky.social · 19/08/2026

local con advertising FFXIV events... very cool! said events are being run by That Person... cool, hey do you think it would disrupt their panel if i waited for them to start talking, then stood up and shot myself in the middle of the room

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jude paw ham recipes 🔞 @glazedhams.bsky.social · 10/08/2026

JP's engineer dad 1: hey quick question why did you design him to do that JP's engineer dad 2: why wouldn't i JP's engineer dad 1: you're a freak. i hate you. [they start making out Ancient Allag style with tongues]

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jude paw ham recipes 🔞 @glazedhams.bsky.social · 10/08/2026

and the thing is, JP has a LOT of capacity- he replenishes almost as fast as he depletes. it'd take a lot of work. but it'd be worth it to see him overstimmed to the point of tears i think

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jude paw ham recipes 🔞 @glazedhams.bsky.social · 10/08/2026

anyway. jude paw cock and balls brained on this day.

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jude paw ham recipes 🔞 @glazedhams.bsky.social · 10/08/2026

on the other other hand, i do not like PVP like at ALL, and 'm not sure trying to do PVP with friends would change that- strong possibility of the opposite happening, honestly, trying to make myself like PVP and failing to do so might make me resent it more. maybe i just do a bloody gpose

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jude paw ham recipes 🔞 @glazedhams.bsky.social · 10/08/2026

on second thought, maybe i do summer of blood anyway and to hell with worrying about if that person will be there. maybe i should stop ceding ground to them and stand on business instead- at least, stand on the business of enjoying my life without regard for how they might try to ruin it

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jude paw ham recipes 🔞 @glazedhams.bsky.social · 09/08/2026

like, it genuinely sucks SO MUCH to have to avoid so much online, and ALSO IRL because this person still lives in the same city i do, and confronting them is more likely to end up with me getting lynched than it would with them seeing any kind of justice

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jude paw ham recipes 🔞 @glazedhams.bsky.social · 09/08/2026

i'm happy with my own little corner of the FFXIV fandom, i like the people i hang with and i'm fine with staying in my lane. sucks pretty bad to have to avoid certain spaces because that person and their friends will be there, though. can't even go to FFXIV events at local cons for the same reason

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jude paw ham recipes 🔞 @glazedhams.bsky.social · 09/08/2026

anyway. a certain upcoming summer event looks like so much fun, and it would be so cool to get involved in it, but it's too closely associated with people i have long since ceded ground to, because i've accepted that trying to call them out for past abuse isn't a fight i can expect to win

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jude paw ham recipes 🔞 @glazedhams.bsky.social · 09/08/2026

i'm not generally the type of want private accounts (especially when they enable a culture of pqrt bullying), but it would be really nice to have a place to vent about certain grievances within the FFXIV community without as much risk of it escaping orbit and blowing the heck up

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jude paw ham recipes 🔞 @glazedhams.bsky.social · 07/08/2026

boy that tanked me fast lol cinder block cinder block cinder block cinder block

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jude paw ham recipes 🔞 @glazedhams.bsky.social · 27/07/2026

the best thing i could do is leave behind a nourishing corpse. this, at least, i'm reasonably sure i can't fuck up

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jude paw ham recipes 🔞 @glazedhams.bsky.social · 27/07/2026

i want to lay down and feed my body to the earth. i simply stop functioning, and my body breaks down and becomes the soil and the grass. maybe an animal eats the grass someday, and i finally become part of something worthwhile- more than i ever achieved as a living human

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jude paw ham recipes 🔞 @glazedhams.bsky.social · 27/07/2026

i think im just tired of trying. i'd like to give up.

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jude paw ham recipes 🔞 @glazedhams.bsky.social · 27/07/2026

kinda getting really tired of putting in maximum effort for minimal return

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jude paw ham recipes 🔞 @glazedhams.bsky.social · 18/07/2026

sometimes you just get handjob brained. it's a simple enough thing, really quite vanilla... but that's part of the appeal, i suppose. back to basics

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jude paw ham recipes 🔞 @glazedhams.bsky.social · 18/07/2026

she looks like she needs a day off!!! JP will take her out for a nice dinner!!!

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jude paw ham recipes 🔞 @glazedhams.bsky.social · 18/07/2026

i think about milfy ocs and lose my mind. need!!!

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jude paw ham recipes 🔞 @glazedhams.bsky.social · 16/07/2026

i don't think i'm supposed to be here anymore

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jude paw ham recipes 🔞 @glazedhams.bsky.social · 16/07/2026

the truth is, i don't believe anyone ever "turned" on me. in every failed friendship and relationship, they just eventually saw what i really was and acted accordingly. as they should. why wouldn't they? they're right. they were always right.

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jude paw ham recipes 🔞 @glazedhams.bsky.social · 13/07/2026

i only get overcome with a need to make Jude Paw suffer (sexually) when i, myself, am feeling a bit pent up. and that's not great, i don't think

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Reposted by jude paw ham recipes 🔞

Talaani Baharat @velvetomen.bsky.social · 13/07/2026

She lost count after the sixth orgasm and her voice after the eigth. The only thing she could feel was the pleasure he gave her and the liquids dripping out of her. #TaliShots #TaliNSFW #elezen #miqote #ffxivnsfw #ffxivlewds #eorzeaafterdark

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