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Gareth Ceredig

@garethceredig.bsky.social
189 followers 215 following 266 posts

||: Words-Music :|| Cold Case Crime Cuts / We Forced A Bot / The Naked Week / The Skewer and so off. Also plays in orchestras in exchange for money.

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Gareth Ceredig @garethceredig.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
Trust me, lads. You can recreate the experience of performing with Andrea Bocelli without it costing a single penny: 1) Wear a dinner jacket. 2) Watch a multi-vehicle motorway pile-up from the nearest overhead gantry. 3) Listen to the ambulance siren and imagine it drenched in artificial reverb.
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Gareth Ceredig @garethceredig.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
SOVIET PUBLISHER This new piece of yours... it's all in five-bar phrases, right? SOVIET COMPOSER No. Why would it be? Why do you always ask that? SOVIET PUBLISHER Sick. So rehearsal marks every five bars? SOVIET COMPOSER No, I said it *isn't* in-- SOVIET PUBLISHER Hey, that's great.
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Gareth Ceredig @garethceredig.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
People who touch hearts: 1) Dr Gunther von Hagens 2) Ed Gein 3)
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Gareth Ceredig @garethceredig.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
Joining us now is Culture Secretary Lisa Nandy...
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Gareth Ceredig @garethceredig.bsky.social · 13/09/2026
conductors advertising adhesives (🧵)
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Gareth Ceredig @garethceredig.bsky.social · 02/09/2026
Of all the things that are not culture, this is quite possibly the not-culturiest.
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Gareth Ceredig @garethceredig.bsky.social · 29/08/2026
Scheherazade Scheherazade 2: Scheherazader Scheherazade with a Vengeance
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Gareth Ceredig @garethceredig.bsky.social · 24/08/2026
Well, there it is. After 350+ years of concerts and tens of billions of possibilities, we finally have an official, undisputed, scientifically proven Worst Programme®. Congratulations to all those responsible; Centre Court at The Hague is booked for Thursday (roof open TBC).
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Gareth Ceredig @garethceredig.bsky.social · 19/08/2026
At last! A reason to film a podcast.
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Gareth Ceredig @garethceredig.bsky.social · 10/08/2026
BRITISH ORCHESTRAL MUSICIANS: We're so glad to see the back of that conductor. What a terrible five-year tenure that was. RUSSIAN ORCHESTRAL MUSICIANS:
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Reposted by Gareth Ceredig
Gareth Ceredig @garethceredig.bsky.social · 16/12/2024
Simon Heffer has written his classical music article again.
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Gareth Ceredig @garethceredig.bsky.social · 30/07/2026
Tomorrow at 15.45, then forever after* on BBC Sounds. Decipher the secret hidden message to win BIG CASH PRIZES 💲💲💲, a guided tour of Broadcasting House, and your own 10-part podcast series with a convicted felon. *for one year
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Gareth Ceredig @garethceredig.bsky.social · 28/07/2026
#stoptheboats #burnhamout
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Gareth Ceredig @garethceredig.bsky.social · 26/07/2026
"and his hand-picked orchestra" #BBCProms
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Gareth Ceredig @garethceredig.bsky.social · 24/07/2026
A new thing on R4 next Friday. It's a devastating exploration of grief and childhood traumahahahahaaa no, not really. It's about a bunch of idiots and a bridge. www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/m...
bbc.co.uk
BBC Radio 4 - Short Works, Take It to the Bridge
A brand-new satirical comedy by Gareth Ceredig. Read by Rebecca Front.
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Gareth Ceredig @garethceredig.bsky.social · 21/07/2026
TELEGRAPH EXCLUSIVE: "Vile and depraved" travel correspondent fails to condemn pun in cancer headline
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Gareth Ceredig @garethceredig.bsky.social · 15/07/2026
Have all the train drivers been raptured?
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Gareth Ceredig @garethceredig.bsky.social · 12/07/2026
Rieusmary's Baby®
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Gareth Ceredig @garethceredig.bsky.social · 03/07/2026
Good grief, but when Tom Wolfe was good he was ludicrously, luridly good. This line alone deserves its own UFC fight, but really the entire collection is brilliant; a cavalcade of queasy counter- (and counter-counter-) culture Americana. Vegas and demolition derbies and Phil Spector, oh my!
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Gareth Ceredig @garethceredig.bsky.social · 30/06/2026
Your occasional reminder that there's a dentist in Florida (of course) called Herbert C. Mantooth. That is all. Go in peace.
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Gareth Ceredig @garethceredig.bsky.social · 17/06/2026
Incredible one-two punch from today's Telegraph feature columnists: 1) I am the stupidest man to have ever lived 2) I have given explosives to kids
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Gareth Ceredig @garethceredig.bsky.social · 13/06/2026
JOURNA. SODDING. LISM.
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Gareth Ceredig @garethceredig.bsky.social · 13/06/2026
First time attending Trooping the Colour. Horse Guards Parade looking magnificent. #blessed #godsavetheking
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Gareth Ceredig @garethceredig.bsky.social · 11/06/2026
Your periodic reminder that the phrase "political columnist" derives from the Old Norse word "pjolkalmniisti", which translates as "child too stupid to fit fork in toaster".
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Gareth Ceredig @garethceredig.bsky.social · 10/06/2026
he lied to us through song
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Gareth Ceredig @garethceredig.bsky.social · 04/06/2026
What a harrowing opening to a biog.
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Gareth Ceredig @garethceredig.bsky.social · 01/06/2026
Nice try, The Telegraph, but this is quite clearly the same person.
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Gareth Ceredig @garethceredig.bsky.social · 01/06/2026
Thought about this again. Still utter cobblers. Still furious.
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Gareth Ceredig @garethceredig.bsky.social · 30/05/2026
You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.
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Gareth Ceredig @garethceredig.bsky.social · 24/05/2026
Very pleasingly, this has won a gold thing for best documentary at the New York Festivals awards, despite not being (but also being) a documentary. Hard to explain, just go listen. Co-worded with the excellent @anc1entmarinade.bsky.social and @jonholmes.bsky.social. www.bbc.co.uk/sounds/play/...
bbc.co.uk
Illuminated - Fantasy Park: Fifty Years On - BBC Sounds
The greatest rock concert ever? Bob Harris hears the story.
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Gareth Ceredig @garethceredig.bsky.social · 20/05/2026
FUTURE ADAM CURTIS: This is the last known photograph of HS2. It was taken in May 2026, shortly before Birmingham was plunged into eternal darkness beneath a trillion uncollected bin bags. The first train arrived in 2040, coinciding with the extinction of the last surviving German Christmas market.
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Gareth Ceredig @garethceredig.bsky.social · 14/05/2026
Say that bit again, Robbo, you big Doppler effect you. What utter dross being handed down by our nation's oh-so-sodding-esteemed fourth estate. A foghorn of nothing. A firehose of breathless bilge. A guesseract of droning womp-wompery.
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Gareth Ceredig @garethceredig.bsky.social · 14/05/2026
Had enough of the deluge of hyperventilating Westminster unjournalism? I'd recommend switching over to Birmingham University's live feed of nesting peregrine falcons for a more nuanced, restful and - let's be honest - no less factual viewing experience. www.youtube.com/live/4dsZIFf...
youtube.com
Live Peregrine Falcon BirdCam | University of Birmingham
YouTube video by University of Birmingham
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Gareth Ceredig @garethceredig.bsky.social · 08/05/2026
What an incredibly normal, functioning country.
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Gareth Ceredig @garethceredig.bsky.social · 02/05/2026
This is a real treat - fascinating and beautifully put together. You'll enjoy it if you're a fan of one or more of the following: music, words, films, saxophones, taxis, drivers (the car kind, not the golf kind) and the American pronunciation of "Bernard". 📻 www.bbc.co.uk/sounds/play/...
bbc.co.uk
Between the Ears - One Last Score - Bernard Herrmann and Taxi Driver - BBC Sounds
The story of Bernard Herrmann's final work for Martin Scorsese's Taxi Driver.
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Gareth Ceredig @garethceredig.bsky.social · 01/05/2026
Sky Arts: Crossing the Rieubicon
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Gareth Ceredig @garethceredig.bsky.social · 25/04/2026
Hey, choral societies! Stop doing this sort of naff, anaemic, cut-price cowboy garbage. Most of you need *more* covering fire, not less. You've got 1000 years of music to choose from; pretty sure you can find something worth singing that's not a colossal kick in the nads to the original composer.
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Gareth Ceredig @garethceredig.bsky.social · 20/04/2026
Yes, happy birthday to the esteemed conductor, scholar, landowner, workplace bully and all-England, four-dimensional, tungsten-tipped c**t. Don't you go dying on me just yet, big guy. I'm saving up for a parade float and a skywriter.
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Gareth Ceredig @garethceredig.bsky.social · 16/04/2026
Let's stick Welsh National Opera's new season announcement through the ArtsSpeak Bullshit Translator®, because it's a belter... "bold new era" / "new chapter" = no money "powerful rebirth" = on life support "progressive" = part-time "reimagined" / "reshaped" = barely an opera company any more
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Gareth Ceredig @garethceredig.bsky.social · 14/04/2026
Easily the worst thing to ever happen there.
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Gareth Ceredig @garethceredig.bsky.social · 11/04/2026
#TheNakedWeek clears off out of it for the summer with some rule-abiding foul-mouthery and some stuff that will probably make you quite angry, but at least that proves you're not *completely* dead inside. Shows what you know, sixth different therapist this year. 📻 www.bbc.co.uk/sounds/play/...
bbc.co.uk
The Naked Week - Series 4 - Swearing, Steeplechase and Strikes - BBC Sounds
Following Trump's tirade, The Naked Week team bleep the hell out of the bleeping news.
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Gareth Ceredig @garethceredig.bsky.social · 10/04/2026
The first thing people see when they emerge from Birmingham New Street station is a cultural jewel, the UK's oldest working cinema... mothballed for over 2 years by a company called Glenbrook Property, who definitely are not waiting for it to very accidentally catch fire and have to be torn down.
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Gareth Ceredig @garethceredig.bsky.social · 03/04/2026
Your annual reminder that it's pronounced "Sinjin" Passion.
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Gareth Ceredig @garethceredig.bsky.social · 30/03/2026
Oh I do love an original idea. Especially when it's so really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really good. Just really good. Really, really good. So great. Really, really great. Brilliant, even. Brilliant and great and good. Well done, broadcasting. You guys are amazing. 📻
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Gareth Ceredig @garethceredig.bsky.social · 27/03/2026
#TheNakedWeek continues at pace. It's a sort of Reithian highway to hell, or "That's Life with nonce jokes", as one commenter so helpfully put it. Give it a listen. Maybe it'll drown out the noise of your appalling family. 📻 www.bbc.co.uk/sounds/play/...
bbc.co.uk
The Naked Week - Series 4 - Who ya gonna call...? (Clue: It's Donald Trump) - BBC Sounds
Who ya gonna call...? (Clue: it's Donald Trump)
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Gareth Ceredig @garethceredig.bsky.social · 20/03/2026
Hire Sarah, for gawd's sake. She is the Funniest Person There Is®.
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Gareth Ceredig @garethceredig.bsky.social · 07/03/2026
#TheNakedWeek has returned to cover the series finale of civilisation (nice idea, too many kinks*, not enough irons**). Episode 1 includes journalism, jokes and some unusual shouting. 📻 *bombs **not bellends www.bbc.co.uk/sounds/play/...
bbc.co.uk
The Naked Week - Series 4 - War, Law, and Operation Amol Rajan - BBC Sounds
We go to war, flout the law, and launch Operation Amol Rajan.
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Gareth Ceredig @garethceredig.bsky.social · 04/03/2026
culture
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Gareth Ceredig @garethceredig.bsky.social · 26/02/2026
Terrible look for the paedophile community. Hard to see them recovering from this.
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Gareth Ceredig @garethceredig.bsky.social · 20/02/2026
ODE TO A RESTAURANT CHAIN Frankie & Benny's How I wonder Why you are What sustains you? It can't be The food You should be dead Dead, like your founders: General Franco and Benito Mussolini
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