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Shawn "Fruan" Poulsen

@fruan.bsky.social
218 followers 424 following 993 posts

He/Him/They Useless lump somewhere in the vicinity of Ōtautahi/Christchurch, New Zealand. Mastodon's premiere Magic: The Gathering shitposter (prove me wrong) - kind.social/@Fruan

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Shawn "Fruan" Poulsen @fruan.bsky.social · 6h
Koth never stopped fighting. The Mirrans might have taken 10 years to win, but they fucking won.
The Magic the Gathering card Darksteel Plate.

"If there can be no victory, then I will fight forever" - Koth of the Hammer.
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Shawn "Fruan" Poulsen @fruan.bsky.social · 07/10/2026
The most valuable card you can own is a union card
Support United Wizards of the Coast - CWA
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Shawn "Fruan" Poulsen @fruan.bsky.social · 07/10/2026
"Every Pack's a God Pack in Cube"

(I mean, there's still commons and shit. I'm just saying Cube is rad)
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Shawn "Fruan" Poulsen @fruan.bsky.social · 09/09/2026
Yep, the math seems to work.
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Shawn "Fruan" Poulsen @fruan.bsky.social · 22/08/2026
if you see this, we implore you to post a picture from whatever device you're using without explanation.
Wow! It's the Empty Set
{}
Nothing in here at all!
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Shawn "Fruan" Poulsen @fruan.bsky.social · 19/08/2026
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Shawn "Fruan" Poulsen @fruan.bsky.social · 14/08/2026
Post a meme made by you.
(me making fun of your [mathematics] idea and thereby holding our people back another 50[] years) [Pythagoras] thinks the beans have [souls]
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Shawn "Fruan" Poulsen @fruan.bsky.social · 30/07/2026
A soldier shielding a sleeping child from various bombs, daggers etc with their body. The incoming danger is labeled "Uninteractive combo decks", the soldier is labeled "Thoughtseize", the sleeping child is labeled "Players who hate uninteractive combo and hate getting thoughtseized"
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Shawn "Fruan" Poulsen @fruan.bsky.social · 17/06/2026
The upcoming card "Daredevil, Man Without Fear", from the Magic: The Gathering set Marvel Super Heroes, crudely edited to replace the text box with "Non-black creatures and non-artifact creatures may block Daredevil"
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Shawn "Fruan" Poulsen @fruan.bsky.social · 16/06/2026
I have come up with a fool-proof method of making sure the reflecting pool in the National Mall in Washington D.C stays American Flag Blue™ no matter what:
The flag of the United States of America, the blue star field recoloured to a sickly algae green.
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Shawn "Fruan" Poulsen @fruan.bsky.social · 02/05/2026
Just in case you thought Jace would be fair and rational in building his new reality: #MtGFracture
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Shawn "Fruan" Poulsen @fruan.bsky.social · 28/04/2026
The 'beans have to take turns' tweet, crudely edited so that it reads:
(me making fun of your [mathematics] idea and thereby holding our people back another 50[ ] years) [Pythagoras] thinks the beans have [souls]
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Shawn "Fruan" Poulsen @fruan.bsky.social · 28/03/2026
Batman breaking a gun over his knee. The gun has been labeled "AI", political cartoon style. He has a speech bubble reading "This is the weapon of the enemy. We do no need it. We will not use it."
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Shawn "Fruan" Poulsen @fruan.bsky.social · 24/03/2026
I adore Warren Mahy's Goblin Guide. I don't know where I'm going either, little buddy. I don't know either.
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Shawn "Fruan" Poulsen @fruan.bsky.social · 22/03/2026
Hey, they can't reprint Shadowspear as just anything you know. It would water down what makes it special if it was reprinted as something that wasn't completely thematically resonant.
The TNMT bonus sheet reprint of Shadowspear as "Donnie's Bō"
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Shawn "Fruan" Poulsen @fruan.bsky.social · 13/03/2026
I have the whole thing labeled so you can pull out the 22 excess cards and really use it as a tarot deck
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Shawn "Fruan" Poulsen @fruan.bsky.social · 19/01/2026
I art from Oko, Lorwyn Liege crudely edited to have a speach bubble.
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Shawn "Fruan" Poulsen @fruan.bsky.social · 09/01/2026
#MagicTheGathering #MtGLorwyn
Screenshots from Pacific Rim (2013) arranged vertically to make a comic strip. A scientist (as played by Burn Gorman) stands infront of a chalkboard and explains his theory passionately. Text has been crudely slapped on these images, subverting the dialogue of the movie:
"Squee was Magic's first Silly Little Guy in Weatherlight. Then Fblthp in Gatecrash. Loot in OTJ and Fleem in Omenpaths... we could be seeing a Silly Little Guy in every set. By Lorwyn Eclipsed we could see a double event"

The sequence ends with a picture of Cragg and Squen, the two silly little guys from the Lorwyn Eclipsed promo materials.
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Shawn "Fruan" Poulsen @fruan.bsky.social · 31/12/2025
Inscrutable new replacement for the Drake meme just dropped:
Two panels cropped out of Graham's storyboards and shorn of context. They barely, just barely, resemble the drake approval/disapproval meme.
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Shawn "Fruan" Poulsen @fruan.bsky.social · 22/12/2025
You've been kidnapped. The characters from the last TV show you watched are trying to rescue you. Who's coming to save you? ... I might be in a little trouble here, but at least all the idiots who'll accidentally get me killed are hot?
The cast of Farscape
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Shawn "Fruan" Poulsen @fruan.bsky.social · 07/12/2025
#MagicTheGathering #MTG #MTGxATLA
An edited page from the comic "Watchmen" (1984). Doctor Manhattan, a sad blue naked man, wanders the desolate surface of Mars. His mournful rambling across three panels are captioned:
"It is 1993. Magic: The Gathering has just released. There is a card that lets you draw three cards for one blue mana. Its power level proves to be a mistake."
"It is 2014. Khans of Tarkir has just released. There is a card that lets you draw three cards for one blue mana. Its power level proves to be a mistake."
"It is 2025. MTGxATLA has just released. There is a card that lets you draw three cards for one blue mana. Its power level proves to be a mistake."
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Shawn "Fruan" Poulsen @fruan.bsky.social · 14/11/2025
Battle station reconfigured into a Bus station- it’s starting to feel a lot like #DesertBus #db2025 #DesertBusForHope
A wall mounted Tv showing the desert bus offline screen, with a monitor put into portrait orientation beside it for the chat
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Shawn "Fruan" Poulsen @fruan.bsky.social · 05/11/2025
#MagicTheGathering #MtG #MtGxATLA
Who would win?

An impenetrable system of fortifications spanning a quarter of a continent (Picture of the upcoming Magic: The Gathering card 'The Walls of Ba Sing Se', a 0/30 wall)

One slimy boi (Picture of the Magic: The Gathering card "Poison Dart Frog", the cutest little 1/1 frog you've ever seen, who can get deathtouch)
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Shawn "Fruan" Poulsen @fruan.bsky.social · 29/10/2025
Uh, this doesn't seem right... #MagicTheGathering
A screenshot from a digital shopfront showing Seanan McGuire's upcoming Magic The Gathering novel "Strixhaven, Omens of Chaos" at a pre-order price of $9999.99
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Shawn "Fruan" Poulsen @fruan.bsky.social · 16/10/2025
If you see this, quote post with your favorite Pokémon (wrong answers only.)
Loot from Magic: The Gathering, art by Arif Wijaya
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Shawn "Fruan" Poulsen @fruan.bsky.social · 12/10/2025
It's honestly a cool and fun card, I promise!
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Shawn "Fruan" Poulsen @fruan.bsky.social · 09/10/2025
Me reading and re-reading the Planeswalker's Guide to Lorwyn Eclipsed to hold me over until January:
The Magic: The Gathering card "Sensation Gorger" from 2008's Morning Tide, part of the original Lorwyn block.

Art by Matt Cavotta shows a high angle looking down on a little green goblin with listening horns inserted into his ears, tiny sticks holding open his eye lids, a skunk draped over his nose, a frog in his mouth, and fish and eyes and I don't know what plastered over his body. This little guy wants to experience EVERYTHING.
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Shawn "Fruan" Poulsen @fruan.bsky.social · 05/10/2025
All these characters from other sources really ruin Magic for me.
The Magic: The Gathering card "Aladdin" from Arabian Nights, Magic's very first expansion way back in 1993

Art by Julie Baroh shows a young man smiling while looking down at the old fashioned style oil lamp he holds.
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Shawn "Fruan" Poulsen @fruan.bsky.social · 19/09/2025
mfw Hades 2 full release is less than a week away #Hades2 #SupergiantGames #Seastar #Sickos
Poseidon as depicted in Hades 2 - an extremely enthusiastic buff man with flowing green hair like the sea, holding a trident.

"Sickos" has been crudely edited across his torso, and a speech bubble reads "YES ... HA HA HA ... YES!" in the style of the sickos meme.
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Shawn "Fruan" Poulsen @fruan.bsky.social · 12/09/2025
The XKCD 'Dependency' comic, edited so the giant ramshackle pile of blocks is labled "All Magic: The Gathering deckbuilding, discussion, content, etc" and the tiny block holding it all up is labed "Scryfall"
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Shawn "Fruan" Poulsen @fruan.bsky.social · 30/08/2025
Excuse me, I need to scryfall every previous MDFC and figure out what new shenanigans are allowed with moonmist. (From magic.wizards.com/en/news/feat...)
But wait! There's a twist! Unlike previous modal double-faced cards, these ones have a built-in way to transform. After all, if you can't change costume, your secret identity is just your identity. If the card's front face is up, there's an activated ability that allows you to transform it to the other face. Previously, a modal double-faced card couldn't transform, but that rule is going away. In fact, any modal double-faced permanent that is instructed to transform now can, although only the new ones in this set come with built-in ways to make that happen.
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Shawn "Fruan" Poulsen @fruan.bsky.social · 02/08/2025
My first 7 win draft for Edge of Eternities; All Fates Stalker is a ridiculously amazing card that provides you with way way too many lines of play to figure. I need to go lie down.
A screenshot of the Magic: Arena deckbuilding interface, showing a white/blue draft deck with two All-Fates Stalkers in it.A screenshot from Magic: Arena showing a 7-2 record.
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Shawn "Fruan" Poulsen @fruan.bsky.social · 01/08/2025
#MagicTheGathering
A still from The Simpsons - Mr Burns holds two bottles of ketchup/catsup. The Magic: The Gathering cards "Portable Hole" and "Seam Rip" have been crudely pasted onto the bottles.
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Shawn "Fruan" Poulsen @fruan.bsky.social · 25/07/2025
#MagicTheGathering
"The Three Fates Clotho, Lachesis, and Atropos", by Giorgio Ghisi - An engraving of the three Fates of greek mythology, spinning a thread, weaving it, and cutting it respectively. They have been crudely relabeled "Emrakul", "Kozilek" and "Ulamog"
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Shawn "Fruan" Poulsen @fruan.bsky.social · 12/07/2025
#MagicTheGathering
Map of the Magic Multiverse

A segment of a donut shape, with a cluster of little circles inside the hole.

The little circles are labeled "Ptolomic universes full of wizards".
The donut is labeled "Einsteinian universe full of spaceships"
The empty space around these figures is labeled "Cthulu"
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Shawn "Fruan" Poulsen @fruan.bsky.social · 10/07/2025
#MagicTheGathering #MtGEternities
The "Is this a pigeon" meme format; a naive and bespectacled anime lad gestures eagerly at a butterfly that has been crudely labled "Lobster Citizen". The image is captioned "Is this a Homarid?"
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Shawn "Fruan" Poulsen @fruan.bsky.social · 04/07/2025
#MagicTheGathering #MtGEternities
A badly composited image of Tezzeret from Magic: The Gathering - the portrait is half way off the left edge of the image - captioned "Oh god how did this get here I am not good with computers"
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Shawn "Fruan" Poulsen @fruan.bsky.social · 02/07/2025
Oh shit. The qualifier is Standard?! That's a format that didn't exist until literally yesterday.
The email showing that your humble poster finished 25th in ranked this month, and is thus qualified for the July Qualifier weekend, to be played in the Magic format of Standard.
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Shawn "Fruan" Poulsen @fruan.bsky.social · 09/06/2025
The magic was inside you all along!
We're going to get you into emergency surgery and get the magic out! I've called and ambulance! I promise you everything is going to be ok!
Lie down and try not to move! It's important that you don't panic! The ambulance will be here soon! You're doing so well!
Just focus on breathing! In and out! Just like that! Everything is going to work out! Stay with me!
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Shawn "Fruan" Poulsen @fruan.bsky.social · 03/05/2025
Post a meme made by you
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Shawn "Fruan" Poulsen @fruan.bsky.social · 23/04/2025
Just had to confirm for myself that this is real, because it squarely hits the union of my three biggest annoyances in life: AI slop, the fall of western democracies into fascism, and being wrong about Magic: The Gathering.
A screenshot of Google's "helpful" AI search results: 

"is a forest card a green card

No, a Forest card is not a "green card" in the way a green card refers to a United States permanent resident card, which is a US legal document. A Forest card in the context of Magic: The Gathering is a basic land card that produces green mana. It is considered a land card and is colorless, but it does have a green color identity."
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Shawn "Fruan" Poulsen @fruan.bsky.social · 15/04/2025
Uhhh...
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Shawn "Fruan" Poulsen @fruan.bsky.social · 10/04/2025
I am yet to lose a game of limited where I resolve a Hardened Tactician. Mobilize already feels like it gives overwhelming tempo. Getting overwhelming card advantage too is just cracked. #MagicTheGathering
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Shawn "Fruan" Poulsen @fruan.bsky.social · 08/04/2025
"I never thought they'd load ME into the Mortarpod"
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Shawn "Fruan" Poulsen @fruan.bsky.social · 18/03/2025
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Shawn "Fruan" Poulsen @fruan.bsky.social · 18/03/2025
screaming, crying, beating my fists on the ground in full toddler-tantrum mode
A cropped screenshot from the Kobo store - "Unavailable in New Zealand"
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Shawn "Fruan" Poulsen @fruan.bsky.social · 14/03/2025
If you see this, post a photo from your device, no explanation.
A "Hello my name is" sticker badge, filled in "Max Speed"
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Shawn "Fruan" Poulsen @fruan.bsky.social · 20/02/2025
Hear me out...
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Shawn "Fruan" Poulsen @fruan.bsky.social · 15/02/2025
Why yes, burning 250 otherwise useless common wildcards to get a cute title does make me feel rather crafty. Thank you for noticing, Magic: Arena. #MagicTheGathering #MtGArena
A crop of a screenshot of Magic: Arena, showing "Fruan, Crafty"
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Shawn "Fruan" Poulsen @fruan.bsky.social · 09/02/2025
#MagicTheGathering #MtGAetherdrift
"Hello, my name is" badge, with the name filled in as "Max Speed"
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