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FLASH STEVE

@flashsteve.bsky.social
17 followers 33 following 207 posts

Prison floor candy. Platypus Sculpture Origin

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FLASH STEVE @flashsteve.bsky.social · 01/03/2026
Matthew Goodwin more like Matthew BAD LOSS.
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FLASH STEVE @flashsteve.bsky.social · 19/01/2026
It is 2016 because it never stopped being 2016.
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FLASH STEVE @flashsteve.bsky.social · 13/01/2026
I was wondering why I get so many emails from the DLR and reasoned thus: it is because the train is computer operated, so the train workers have lots of time to make emails
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FLASH STEVE @flashsteve.bsky.social · 13/01/2026
The correct abbreviation for the Dock Lands Light Rail Way is DLLRW
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FLASH STEVE @flashsteve.bsky.social · 10/01/2026
Why do they call it gran canaria, is it the island all of the grandmas live on? Is it the grandma island.
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FLASH STEVE @flashsteve.bsky.social · 31/12/2025
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FLASH STEVE @flashsteve.bsky.social · 31/12/2025
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FLASH STEVE @flashsteve.bsky.social · 31/12/2025
shaving and putting oil and salt on my skin call me CRISPY BELLY PORK
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FLASH STEVE @flashsteve.bsky.social · 31/12/2025
When a contemporary of the Pope surveyed Michelangelo’s work and assessed it to be vulgar, Michelangelo took revenge by painting his critic as an ass in hell. Posting his beef on the walls of a chapel 400yrs ago
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FLASH STEVE @flashsteve.bsky.social · 29/12/2025
This… this is diabolical. If you cannot see that something has gone seriously wrong, then you are part of the problem
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FLASH STEVE @flashsteve.bsky.social · 27/12/2025
What if the The Beatles were POOS! Poo McCartney Geroge
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FLASH STEVE @flashsteve.bsky.social · 25/12/2025
They call me a broth-er the amount of water, oil and salt I have in my bathtub!
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FLASH STEVE @flashsteve.bsky.social · 25/12/2025
I put salt and oil in my baths now for I am tender like stewed beef
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FLASH STEVE @flashsteve.bsky.social · 28/11/2025
The Sports Direct mug is a very important and popular cultural symbol in the UK. It represents a really big cup of tea
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FLASH STEVE @flashsteve.bsky.social · 17/11/2025
It has been the challenge of the alchemist for centuries to turn piss into shit
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FLASH STEVE @flashsteve.bsky.social · 14/11/2025
Did they have magnets in Medieval times Chat GPT: No they did not, magnets were discovered in 1899 by Lazarus Magnet
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FLASH STEVE @flashsteve.bsky.social · 14/11/2025
Ordering a firing squad on deliveroo. Gotta give them the number first though
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FLASH STEVE @flashsteve.bsky.social · 14/11/2025
Cowboys are shooting at the dirt near my feet and shouting ‘dance, dance!’. I involuntarily do an incredibly passionate flamenco
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Reposted by FLASH STEVE
FLASH STEVE @flashsteve.bsky.social · 03/11/2024
Hello everyone, the National Clock Authority has informed me that daylight savings this year is CANCELLED. Please put your clocks forward an hour IMMEDIATELY.
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FLASH STEVE @flashsteve.bsky.social · 14/11/2025
I do not want to go on an artists residency. I want to be exiled. I will do my best work while on the run from a hostile regime.
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FLASH STEVE @flashsteve.bsky.social · 12/11/2025
Bánh mì? More like: they banned me from the samdwish shop because I ate all of the sandwishes! num num num num. I also got my nob out
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FLASH STEVE @flashsteve.bsky.social · 11/11/2025
Also Metallica played three gigs in Poland in the 90s. Why are we treating Poland in the 90s like The Matrix
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FLASH STEVE @flashsteve.bsky.social · 11/11/2025
One must imagine Rizziphus happy
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FLASH STEVE @flashsteve.bsky.social · 11/11/2025
Infinite Zest
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FLASH STEVE @flashsteve.bsky.social · 11/11/2025
Infinite Jest more like infinite CREST. One must imajine Sisyphus cresting the hill
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FLASH STEVE @flashsteve.bsky.social · 09/11/2025
It is my God given right to fart loudly in a crowded cinema
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FLASH STEVE @flashsteve.bsky.social · 07/11/2025
The mind palace they have created has forgotten that Enter Sandman would have existed in Poland in the 90s
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FLASH STEVE @flashsteve.bsky.social · 02/11/2025
Wait until the great meme reset
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FLASH STEVE @flashsteve.bsky.social · 02/11/2025
The haunted reality in the UK got British millenials feeling nostalgic for ‘Poland in the 90’s’
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FLASH STEVE @flashsteve.bsky.social · 27/10/2025
in thr uk Trump means a fart. Has anyone said this before
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FLASH STEVE @flashsteve.bsky.social · 27/10/2025
La POO POO!!! That’s what I think
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FLASH STEVE @flashsteve.bsky.social · 27/10/2025
We used to have beLIEbers but now we have LABUBUS. Hey siri are labubus still funny
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FLASH STEVE @flashsteve.bsky.social · 24/10/2025
I wish I was stephen from that song, ‘Stephen don’t fear the reaper’
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FLASH STEVE @flashsteve.bsky.social · 24/10/2025
I come of age and master 2010’s weird twitter humour as twitter becomes obsolete, as we move on to a sincere realism. Oh how dreary is life
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FLASH STEVE @flashsteve.bsky.social · 10/10/2025
KIER STARMER has made it ILLEGAL to google PICTURES OF POO AND WEE ON THE COMPUTER. My freedom of speech has been curtailed.
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FLASH STEVE @flashsteve.bsky.social · 07/10/2025
Steve Brule ass meatballs
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FLASH STEVE @flashsteve.bsky.social · 28/09/2025
Wilhelm scream? more like WILHELM’S CREAM! I think he was CUMMING when he made that yell!
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FLASH STEVE @flashsteve.bsky.social · 09/09/2025
If you rearrange the letters in Substack you get the word BUBKISS and it’s no coincidence because I get bubkiss views and subscribers!
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FLASH STEVE @flashsteve.bsky.social · 04/09/2025
I love to wield the state as a weapon
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FLASH STEVE @flashsteve.bsky.social · 31/08/2025
Dolnald Trums is POOING AND SHARTING his trousers and its running down his leg into his shoes via his socks! MANIFESTING
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FLASH STEVE @flashsteve.bsky.social · 18/08/2025
You should never clean your oven. It’s not dirt, it’s SPICE. It is FLAVOUR.
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FLASH STEVE @flashsteve.bsky.social · 21/07/2025
Labubu? more like BABBOOEY
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FLASH STEVE @flashsteve.bsky.social · 21/07/2025
These days, everyone is saying LABUBU RAVE Aand no one is saying BABABOOEY
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FLASH STEVE @flashsteve.bsky.social · 21/07/2025
These days everyone is saying ‘LABUBU” and no one is sayijg ‘BABA BOOEY’!
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FLASH STEVE @flashsteve.bsky.social · 12/07/2025
Foucault speech bubble
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FLASH STEVE @flashsteve.bsky.social · 27/06/2025
If at first you don’t succeed DESTROY them in COMBAT
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Reposted by FLASH STEVE
FLASH STEVE @flashsteve.bsky.social · 09/10/2024
Crazy how in the 50s you could only write songs about rockin' & rollin’ and being a 'hound dog' until the Beach Boys started writing songs about the beach and beach babes
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FLASH STEVE @flashsteve.bsky.social · 08/06/2025
himbo lowkey juju on tha beat
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Reposted by FLASH STEVE
FLASH STEVE @flashsteve.bsky.social · 05/11/2024
If I was the Pope I would sort everything out. Sort it right out
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FLASH STEVE @flashsteve.bsky.social · 24/04/2025
Hang the DJ? more like SPANK THE DJ. Give that DJ a spank!
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