alternative milks @flamingo-teeth.bsky.social · 15/03/2026the other best thing is nobody tries to press-gang you into their essential oils downline 020
alternative milks @flamingo-teeth.bsky.social · 13/03/2026did anybody else repeatedly play elroy goes bugzerk on the computer in the late 90s and if so did it also form part of the bedrock of your sense of humor 011
alternative milks @flamingo-teeth.bsky.social · 12/03/2026there’s absolutely no reason john redcorn and nancy couldn’t have just invited dale into a loving anarchic polycule 020
alternative milks @flamingo-teeth.bsky.social · 22/12/2025new form of lateral violence: a lesbian i dislike asked if im watching heated rivalry 030
alternative milks @flamingo-teeth.bsky.social · 15/11/20252026 is gonna be the year that i get blocked by the Them instagram 000
alternative milks @flamingo-teeth.bsky.social · 03/11/2025ok so at this point i’ve smoked enough different strains of weed to know that yes, in fact they all do have different and distinctive tasting notes. the problem is all of these are Not Great 120
alternative milks @flamingo-teeth.bsky.social · 13/09/2025do not ask for whom the vengabus comes. it comes for thee 010
alternative milks @flamingo-teeth.bsky.social · 23/08/2025unfortunately i’m pretty sure comedy peaked with the bud light real men of genius radio commercials and it’s been a long slow descent ever since 010
alternative milks @flamingo-teeth.bsky.social · 20/08/2025dnd: - do not dragons - dungeons and disturb - do not desuscitate - dungeons not dragons - do not do 151
alternative milks @flamingo-teeth.bsky.social · 14/08/2025hey siri how can i become more problematic 030
Reposted by alternative milksAang @aanglerfish.bsky.social · 07/08/2025There’s a type of overly sanitized cottagecore-ish “just a little guy” mouse-in-a-jean-jacket aesthetic that imo in today’s climate and push for purity culture is a little too close to the right wing tradwife vibe 021
alternative milks @flamingo-teeth.bsky.social · 18/07/2025i want to remake the entire sleepaway camp series. trans icon angela still murders the same amount of people but her hair is better and she’s less hung up on camping. in fact she’s murdering people so they stop making her go camping. but they keep making her go and that’s why there’s sequels 020
alternative milks @flamingo-teeth.bsky.social · 16/07/2025“i went on t and it made me not a lesbian anymore nooooo” skill issue. when i went on t it made me so violently lesbionic that los angeles county wants me humanely destroyed. they’re going to put a stop to me. gavin newsom said so 050
alternative milks @flamingo-teeth.bsky.social · 14/07/2025the terror (novel) : indigenous people are spooky as hell, eh wot! the terror (tv): colonial masculinity is a fucking prison 030
alternative milks @flamingo-teeth.bsky.social · 11/07/2025jojo siwa 2012 tumblr transmed tboy phase dropping in 2026 040
alternative milks @flamingo-teeth.bsky.social · 08/07/2025haunted by this one time i was at the aquarium with @theirkingdom.bsky.social and we glibly referred to a tortoise as a turtle and a volunteer docent corrected us with such horny smarm… such relish… pls girl check ur mug before you come for my knowledge of testudinidae 030
alternative milks @flamingo-teeth.bsky.social · 18/06/2025the other best thing hrt gave me was the ability to go “hmm” in a dubious manner à la bob belcher 130
alternative milks @flamingo-teeth.bsky.social · 16/06/2025the best thing about being a tr🔺nny is that nobody from high school tries to Reconnect with you 050
alternative milks @flamingo-teeth.bsky.social · 07/06/2025queens from past seasons of rpdr should get a RuPension 030
alternative milks @flamingo-teeth.bsky.social · 22/05/2025when somebody talks to/near me about their kids one of my favorite things to do is go “yeah i was like that too and look how i turned out” and watch their face go all neo cubist 030
alternative milks @flamingo-teeth.bsky.social · 16/04/2025if i saw a man wearing this in public i would drive him to a high kill shelter 010
alternative milks @flamingo-teeth.bsky.social · 27/03/2025hey yeah so god descended to the top of the mountain and called me up and he told me to tell y’all there’s a new one: “thou shalt not make of a musician’s catalogue a jukebox musical until after they’re dead. it’s enough already, christ alive” 120
alternative milks @flamingo-teeth.bsky.social · 26/03/2025at some point in their life every millennial has had to put up with a roommate whose entire personality is liking of montreal 020
alternative milks @flamingo-teeth.bsky.social · 22/03/2025my favorite hobby is making snap judgements about my rover clients’ significant others 020
Reposted by alternative milksGeorge Takei @georgetakei.bsky.social · 14/03/2025These are the senators who collaborated with the GOP. Schumer Fetterman Cortez Masto Durbin King Shaheen Gillibrand Schatz Hassan Peters Don’t let them forget it. No peace for them. 39975873019660
alternative milks @flamingo-teeth.bsky.social · 07/03/2025ax guy: i’m gonna chop off your leg guy with leg: oh no please don’t ax guy: okay i will wait a month guy with leg: ax guy: where’s my hug 010
alternative milks @flamingo-teeth.bsky.social · 07/03/2025the TATACASA is a lil old place where WE CAN SEE SOME TATAAAAAAS 030
Reposted by alternative milksMx Maddison Stoff @thedescenters.bsky.social · 05/03/2025The real original sin belongs to god imo for building a whole world full of thinking feeling loving beings just to suck his dick rhetorically in thanks at being alive. His second sin was trying to pretend it was our fault by setting up his garden test for us to fail then punishing us for failing it. 6426
alternative milks @flamingo-teeth.bsky.social · 04/03/2025behold the awful jackass who has eaten his second air conditioning cord in less than one year 110
alternative milks @flamingo-teeth.bsky.social · 28/02/2025got too high and commented “haha yea so true bestie also the government wants me dead” on this and my gf wisely made me delete it 040
alternative milks @flamingo-teeth.bsky.social · 20/02/2025feeding these things one by one into the sink disposal might heal me 250
alternative milks @flamingo-teeth.bsky.social · 18/02/2025the fuck did a ferret ever do to brian jacques though 210
alternative milks @flamingo-teeth.bsky.social · 13/02/2025anakin skywalker would have been an early investor in wework. that’s all i know. 020
alternative milks @flamingo-teeth.bsky.social · 12/02/2025“forgot my vape at my parents’ house”: a diptych 050
alternative milks @flamingo-teeth.bsky.social · 12/02/2025“pinky, are you pondering what i’m pondering?” “i think so, brain, but i’m not sure we have enough lube.” 020
alternative milks @flamingo-teeth.bsky.social · 07/02/2025i have no idea how to communicate with people who don’t watch reality television 120
alternative milks @flamingo-teeth.bsky.social · 06/02/2025just a couple guys both on hormones and psychiatric medication 170
