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Jowin Glastrum @firstgreywarden.bsky.social · 30/09/2026

The Grey Wardens stand behind the Blightlines.

Jowin Glastrum @firstgreywarden.bsky.social · 19/09/2026

Well. How Wardens spend their time away from the battlefield is on them. But they should not be fraternizing with one another.

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Jowin Glastrum @firstgreywarden.bsky.social · 18/09/2026

This accursed tome speaks lies in the name of the Grey Wardens. It must be destroyed.

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Jowin Glastrum @firstgreywarden.bsky.social · 18/09/2026

Enjoy is not the word I would use, Seeker, but anything before my blade, be it Blight or Dragon or the vanity of Man, shall fall.

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Jowin Glastrum @firstgreywarden.bsky.social · 12/09/2026

Love in the workplace is an HR Violation ❌ Fraternizing among fellow Wardens create odd power dynamics 🙅, conflicts of interests and issues of favoritism (!!!), and worst of all, possible distractions from slaying Darkspawn 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥

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Jowin Glastrum @firstgreywarden.bsky.social · 11/09/2026

I knew they were up to no good! Clear proof they are canoodling!

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Jowin Glastrum @firstgreywarden.bsky.social · 01/09/2026

Tens, with frowns?? What game are you playing Magister when you treat the Darkspawn as a joke. Try thousands of Darkspawn I have slain with my sword. Try thousands of lives saved by the Grey Warden. Try to compare, and fall short.

static.klipy.com

Macho Testosterone Flex

ALT: Macho Testosterone Flex

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Jowin Glastrum @firstgreywarden.bsky.social · 31/08/2026

Davrin is ...acceptable. Save for the company he keeps.

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Jowin Glastrum @firstgreywarden.bsky.social · 31/08/2026

I cannot protect Thedas with a smile, bah. Sword, Shield, and Sacrifice are how Grey Wardens defend Thedas from the Blight.

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Jowin Glastrum @firstgreywarden.bsky.social · 31/08/2026

A new winner would please me, this is true.

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Jowin Glastrum @firstgreywarden.bsky.social · 31/08/2026

A phrase from our Junior Wardens feels appropriate to this situation, Alistair. "Sometimes, it do be like that."

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Jowin Glastrum @firstgreywarden.bsky.social · 31/08/2026

The Wardens are not concerned with any King, much less the one of Ferelden.

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Jowin Glastrum @firstgreywarden.bsky.social · 31/08/2026

Alistair "HR Violations" Theirin is not a role model for young Wardens, no.

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Jowin Glastrum @firstgreywarden.bsky.social · 30/08/2026

Nothing could ever bite me on the nose.

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Jowin Glastrum @firstgreywarden.bsky.social · 30/08/2026

Why, me, the illustrious First Warden of course.

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Jowin Glastrum @firstgreywarden.bsky.social · 30/08/2026

Workplace violence has no place among the Wardens.

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Jowin Glastrum @firstgreywarden.bsky.social · 30/08/2026

The Grey Wardens have defeated many Blights. You're just jealous of our grandeur.

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Jowin Glastrum @firstgreywarden.bsky.social · 30/08/2026

When in doubt, ask yourself, "WWTGWD?" What would the Grey Wardens do? 🛡️

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Jowin Glastrum @firstgreywarden.bsky.social · 14/08/2026

Was it you? 🫵 I find your accusation that I could be making this up as a guise for a surprise attack against my enemies APPALLING.

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Jowin Glastrum @firstgreywarden.bsky.social · 13/08/2026

I am of sound mind, Cole. Unfortunately, the Grey Wardens have plenty of enemies, and the investigation is ongoing as to who launched this targeted attack against us. I've learned that "Password1" is a terrible Fadecode for this message board.

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Jowin Glastrum @firstgreywarden.bsky.social · 12/08/2026

IMPORTANT MESSAGE: FROM the real First Warden and Supreme Commander. It turns out that my "message board account" was hacked by an Enemy of the Wardens, who made claims and statements regarding the Venatori and Inquisition that reflected poorly on my character. We are investigating. That is all.

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Jowin Glastrum @firstgreywarden.bsky.social · 10/08/2026

My mind is free of the Blight, Rook, and my words ring true. The Maker has chosen His Deliverance. Andraste stands behind my shield. Fall in line, if you dare care yourself Warden, or stand aside.

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Jowin Glastrum @firstgreywarden.bsky.social · 10/08/2026

Everything special about you came out of the Rift. I serve Thedas, in the dark and in the light, for that is my Calling as the True Herald (fin).

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Jowin Glastrum @firstgreywarden.bsky.social · 10/08/2026

My beloved Weisshaupt fell as the Shield of the Frontlines. It stood its vigil, won its war, MADE its sacrifice. Skyhold stands because you hid in your mountains and profane to call yourself worthy and accepting of the title Herald. Do you know the names of those who died under your banner? (-)

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Jowin Glastrum @firstgreywarden.bsky.social · 10/08/2026

Solas was no god, for there is only the Maker, and the true Herald would know my words speak true. His threat to Thedas began under your Watch. Accept responsibility, Inquisitor, if not punishment (?/-lol almost done)

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Jowin Glastrum @firstgreywarden.bsky.social · 10/08/2026

Did not Qunari spies and Solas' agents, in their profane heretical movement, amass under your banner? Is your organization infallible compared to the faith, oath, and calling or every soldier who dare call themselves Grey Wardens? Are you not responsible then, as you claim I am for Erimond? (3/-)

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Jowin Glastrum @firstgreywarden.bsky.social · 10/08/2026

Cry as you might about Erimond, but his actions were unsanctioned and decried. If you wish to hold me accountable for errant Wardens, sobeit, but judge only if you are prepared to be judged, Inquisitor. (2/-)

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Jowin Glastrum @firstgreywarden.bsky.social · 10/08/2026

And Corypheus would not have escaped his imprisonment, which held for hundreds of years, if it were not for the interference of Hawke and Varric, allies and founders of your Inquisition and Rook's "Veilguard." (1/-)

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Jowin Glastrum @firstgreywarden.bsky.social · 10/08/2026

Short-sighted as ever, Rook. Luckily, I do not need your recognition—all you do is feed fairytales of false ambitions and doubly heroic actions, while I have held Thedas together for years. Of course The Maker chose me & Andraste in her Sacred Wisdom ordains it so.

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Jowin Glastrum @firstgreywarden.bsky.social · 10/08/2026

...and it is telling, your Inquisitorness, you false Herald, that you would belittle the actions of my leadership anong Grey Wardens and focus on simple mistakes years in the past. Cling to your title, falsely obtained, but know Skyhold will not be protected from the Maker's Wrath. Mark my words.

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Jowin Glastrum @firstgreywarden.bsky.social · 10/08/2026

You have "saved" Thedas three times over, you say? In each case, it was you and your sister who endangered Thedas in the first place. The Breach. "Corypheus" and "Solas." The Sixth Blight. Saving Thedas from danger you create is not actions of a Herald. I have held Thedas together for years...

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Jowin Glastrum @firstgreywarden.bsky.social · 10/08/2026

I have been Chosen by The Maker to lead His Holy Light from the Anderfels to Ferelden. I am The Herald of Andraste and Commander of the Final Exalted March. Oh, and my Right has been recognized by Tevinter and The Grey Wardens. Soon, all of Thedas will align to my banner.

static.klipy.com

Ron Swanson's Permit: I Can Do What I Want

ALT: Ron Swanson's Permit: I Can Do What I Want

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Jowin Glastrum @firstgreywarden.bsky.social · 10/08/2026

I simply follow the hierarchy established by the Maker. Divine Victoria would be wise to do the same. I could create an org chat for her, if that would help.

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Jowin Glastrum @firstgreywarden.bsky.social · 09/08/2026

As the Herald, I stand above the Divine.

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Jowin Glastrum @firstgreywarden.bsky.social · 09/08/2026

Chat, is it acceptable to negotiate with the Venatori in The Big 9:2026 Dragon Age?

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Jowin Glastrum @firstgreywarden.bsky.social · 09/08/2026

Would you expect any other actions from an enemy of the Chantry? To defy me, the Herald of Andraste?

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Jowin Glastrum @firstgreywarden.bsky.social · 09/08/2026

Agreed. I accept the title instead. I am Jowin Glastrum, Herald of Andraste, First Warden, and Supreme Commander of the Blight. My first decree is that Rook is a heretic and should be considered Enemy #1 of the Chantry.

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