iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

I won’t do this but I’d love to have a YouTube profile named after a famous dictator or war criminal and just comment “idc what the haters say, I love this song” on every controversial Taylor Swift or Stella Lefty song

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World’s Only Evan Diem @evandiem.bsky.social · 25/09/2026

Just got a Premium subscription to the weather app. I’m up on weather y’all don’t even know about

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World’s Only Evan Diem @evandiem.bsky.social · 23/09/2026

MLK waking up in the middle of the night: “I had the dream again”

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World’s Only Evan Diem @evandiem.bsky.social · 22/09/2026

They gotta get a handle on this stuff, man

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World’s Only Evan Diem @evandiem.bsky.social · 22/09/2026

Whenever I taste beer I feel so disappointed that THAT’S what people are drinking. Like Homer Simpson is going crazy for THIS archaic-ass fermented grain beverage???

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World’s Only Evan Diem @evandiem.bsky.social · 01/09/2026

Post a meme made by you How can I choose just one??

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World’s Only Evan Diem @evandiem.bsky.social · 08/08/2026

What speaks but is never heard, enters a room but takes up no space, and works but is never acknowledged?

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World’s Only Evan Diem @evandiem.bsky.social · 04/08/2026

Bought a second hand clock so I don’t know what time it is, but I do know when it’ll change.

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World’s Only Evan Diem @evandiem.bsky.social · 03/08/2026

The nap is the key that opens the door to being awake later

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World’s Only Evan Diem @evandiem.bsky.social · 29/07/2026

Horny Beths be like “we were hump rope glazers in the middle of the night”

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World’s Only Evan Diem @evandiem.bsky.social · 29/07/2026

Helping my friend with his Cyrano de Bergerac book report by hiding around the corner and whispering the plot of the story to him.

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World’s Only Evan Diem @evandiem.bsky.social · 23/07/2026

They call it the restroom because I feel like I’m about to spend the rest of my life here

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World’s Only Evan Diem @evandiem.bsky.social · 08/07/2026

Call me government-induced self-censorship the way I have a chillin effect 😎

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World’s Only Evan Diem @evandiem.bsky.social · 10/06/2026

When you’re at a sleepover with Matthew, Mark, Luke and John and they see you put on regular pajamas

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World’s Only Evan Diem @evandiem.bsky.social · 15/04/2026

Lifemogging Clavicular by continuing to be in good health

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World’s Only Evan Diem @evandiem.bsky.social · 15/04/2026

Often thinking about what the world be like if Kanye had been too cool for the safe belt

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World’s Only Evan Diem @evandiem.bsky.social · 13/04/2026

Of course trans puppygirls love electronic music, so many of them are sub woofers

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World’s Only Evan Diem @evandiem.bsky.social · 13/04/2026

In recent slang, rawdogging means to do an activity without distraction or entertainment, (e.g. rawdogging a flight). This joke sets up the original meaning of unprotected sex and then subverts it by implying the modern meaning to create a retrospective misdirection. Classic paraprosdokian.

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World’s Only Evan Diem @evandiem.bsky.social · 13/04/2026

Rawdogging sex by not using my phone at all

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World’s Only Evan Diem @evandiem.bsky.social · 08/04/2026

Woody Allen does use AI: Adolescent Intrigue

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World’s Only Evan Diem @evandiem.bsky.social · 08/04/2026

Just found out Pavlov had a dog named Angel who he conditioned to eat wings. So that’s where the phrase comes from.

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World’s Only Evan Diem @evandiem.bsky.social · 03/04/2026

You know the kidnapping plot in Labyrinth was all improvised? They simply put David Bowie near an underage girl and he just did all that!

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World’s Only Evan Diem @evandiem.bsky.social · 25/03/2026

The only neurotypical people who like me are white women who type “bahaha” when they laugh

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World’s Only Evan Diem @evandiem.bsky.social · 12/03/2026

Mr. Sandman: dude I’m freaking out right now Me: okay count five sheep you can see

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World’s Only Evan Diem @evandiem.bsky.social · 12/03/2026

The voice of every person who has ever covered The Book of Love singing in perfect, beautiful harmony: “The book of love is long and throbbing, it tells the story of my dong”

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World’s Only Evan Diem @evandiem.bsky.social · 03/03/2026

I would’ve thought something big suits you

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World’s Only Evan Diem @evandiem.bsky.social · 03/03/2026

Shorty gave me that shit you only get once in a life time and yeah I’m talking head

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World’s Only Evan Diem @evandiem.bsky.social · 30/01/2026

When we were young we had Morrowind and Skyrim, now our parents are using phones in nursing homes. How our Elders Scroll into Oblivion. Sad.

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World’s Only Evan Diem @evandiem.bsky.social · 23/01/2026

Joni Mitchell voice I’ve clapped those cheeks from both sides now

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World’s Only Evan Diem @evandiem.bsky.social · 14/01/2026

Angel ringing bell for service at a restaurant: uhh can i get the wings?

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