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hellokatetan on Instagram: "Sometimes when I close my eyes, I can still feel his hands closing around my throat.There’s nothing I can do to romanticize this, t…"
Sometimes when I close my eyes, I can still feel his hands closing around my throat.There’s nothing I can do to romanticize this, to make this feel better, except to sit as I listen to this poem, and the tears fall. I made this video scared and afraid, but I knew I had to, because I, too, am Jane Doe. I remember waking up and not knowing where I was, an unrecognizable face up against mine, above me, and all I could say was no, no, no, no. My cries meant nothing, and even after, all I could think about was how stupid I was for getting myself into that situation.I have been through enough moments in life where it is now my default to look behind me if I see even so much as a figure walking in the same direction, to hold my keys between my fingers as I’m walking in the dark, to double check myself in the mirror before I go out for a run and ask “am I dressed indecently?” I know the fear that comes when someone walks too close behind me, I even fear taking the public transport because I’ve been touched inappropriately more than once. As I read about the Cornell 7 over the last two weeks, waves of anger, sadness, frustration, even fury, rose up in my chest. A small voice at the back of my head said “This is normal, there’s nothing we can do about it.” I detested that voice, and I refused to bow to it and I refuse to take it as the truth. I pray that our daughters, our nieces, our cousins, our sisters, our mothers, our students... will never have to grow up with this fear, but if I’m being honest... this is part of a system that has failed to protect us not just from the physical pain, but the mental and emotional fatigue of walking through a world we can never feel safe in. This perhaps is the first way I can stand in solidarity and use my platform.. and this poem encapsulates so many things I wish I could say, but never found the courage to. Follow along for more versions of courage, and hopefully it’ll rub off on you.Original poem by @abigail.anne.poetry
