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Dylan Morrison @dylanthyme.bsky.social · 17h

Comfort Read comes out in two days! Fake dating, queer joy, celebrity/ordinary guy romance, a cozy bookstore, a terrifyingly intelligent orange cat, Big Fall Energy: this book has it all. geni.us/1579-al-aut-ch

An image of the Comfort Read cover (which features two men in a bookshop with an orange cat), superimposed over a photo of a cosy bookstore. A yellow stamp on top reads "Get your copy today!"

A five star reader review of Comfort Read. "This book had me laughing with delight, sobbing into the pages, and feeling every emotion in between. Honestly, it felt like being wrapped up in a cosy blanket."

A five star reader review of Comfort Read. "I pretty rarely give 5-stars to a contemporary romance but this deserves it. I stayed up til almost 4AM to finish it!"

A five star reader review of Comfort Read. "This book has my entire heart!"

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Dylan Morrison @dylanthyme.bsky.social · 21/09/2026

My next book, Comfort Read, is out October 8th! It's a queer fake dating romcom full of heart and feelings and a bookstore cat and people (but never cats) making fools of themselves. I'm awful at talking about my books so here some of the early reviews in which other people talk about it instead 😄

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Dylan Morrison @dylanthyme.bsky.social · 21/05/2026

You can get your copy of Second Helpings through this link (geni.us/1469-rd-fbo-am) or through bookshop.org, Hoopla, requesting it from you local library, etcetera! It promises at least a few hours of escape from the dystopian present, although it may may you hungry 😉

The cover of Second Helpings, which features two men in front of a menu board. One man is sitting at a table and the other is standing holding a tray with condiments. The book is set against a backdrop of tomatoes and next to the words OUT NOW.

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Dylan Morrison @dylanthyme.bsky.social · 21/05/2026

A warm, cozy and funny second-chance romance filled with found family, a chaotic deli dog named Pastrami, and all the comfort food you could ever want, SECOND HELPINGS is available in ebook, print and audio! Here's a bit of the delightful audiobook if you want a taste 😄

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Dylan Morrison @dylanthyme.bsky.social · 21/05/2026

IT'S PUB DAY! So excited to say that SECOND HELPINGS is out now. This book is a love letter to second chances, deli food, Cleveland, food service, and of course queer romance 🌈💜🥪 I hope you love it as much as I do!

A photo of Second Helpings next to a wrapped sandwich. The cover features two men in front of a menu board, one sitting at a table, the other wearing an apron and holding a tray with condiments on it.

A five-star reader review for Second Helpings. "A definite five stars! This book was an absolute and total joy to read, and I know it will stay with me for a long time."

A five-star reader review for Second Helpings. "I absolutely loved this book! I was hooked from the very beginning and never wanted it to end."

A five-star reader review for Second Helpings. "This book pulled at my heart strings. There were moments that felt so real, like I was a part of it all."

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Dylan Morrison @dylanthyme.bsky.social · 20/05/2026

my new book, SECOND HELPINGS, is out tomorrow; what better time to show you the gorgeous cover for my next one? COMFORT READ comes out in october, and it's an extravaganza of fake dating, cozy bookshop vibes, hollywood chaos, an opinionated cat, and, of course, big queer joy 🌈 geni.us/1579-al-aut-ch

The cover for COMFORT READ by Dylan Morrison against an illustrated backdrop of stacked books. The cover depicts two men in bookshop, one passing another a book from atop a ladder that's leaning against the shelves. A large orange cat stands at the feet of the man on the ground.

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Dylan Morrison @dylanthyme.bsky.social · 14/05/2026

never forget it's almost always projection lmaoooo. dudes out here making asses of themselves and coming up with gross/wrong reasons to be mad when deep down it's just about how this is odysseus and will never be them. sad

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Dylan Morrison @dylanthyme.bsky.social · 02/04/2026

my next book, SECOND HELPINGS, is now available for request on netgalley! if you like LOVE STORIES and RIDICULOUS SIDE CHARACTER SHENANIGANS and FOUND FAMILY and SIBLING HIJINKS and RESTAURANT ROMANCE and especially ✨ SECOND CHANCES ✨ then you're going to love this one 💜

The cover of my next book, SECOND HELPINGS, against a yellow background printed with tomatoes. The cover is purple and features one man sitting at a table gazing up at another man wearing an apron and holding a serving tray.

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Dylan Morrison @dylanthyme.bsky.social · 13/02/2026

it's just like that old saying: when in doubt, write the dog you wish you had into your novel and hope you have unsettling godlike dog summoning powers

Sam makes toast, which he burns, & then, figuring he has the time to do better & he might as well use it, makes pancakes instead. He burns those too, his attention so consistently drawn to staring out his window at Jake’s building that he keeps missing his opportunity to flip them. In the end he eats the two that are least charred &, after a particularly unpleasant bite, attempts to wash it down with the power of coffee.
The coffee, too, is burnt. It’s still only 4:37AM. Sam despairs briefly of being alive.
He decides, in the circumstances, that he has no choice but to go and get Pastrami.
Pastrami plays a variety of roles in Sam’s life; it is, of course, a meat available for purchase at the deli, & one about which, if he happens not to have it in stock, a few specific people will get really annoying. But Pastrami is also the name of Sam's dog, chosen because, when she was a puppy, she’d looked as though she planned to grow into a small to medium-sized white dog, with a thick coating of black speckles. When Sam found her digging around in the trash behind the deli four years ago, she’d been skin & bones, barely a few months old, & the speckles had reminded him of the pepper on the outside of a piece of pastrami.
The name had stuck, even though Pastrami herself had seemingly decided, in the end, that she was not interested in being a white dog with black speckles, or indeed in being either small or medium sized. She had, instead, grown up to be quite a surprisingly large black dog with white speckles, & long, slightly floofy fur, & one ear that was constantly flopping over her eye while the other stood ramrod straight. Her veterinarian, after some thoughtful consideration, had filled in the section of her file marked ‘Breed’ with eight question marks.
Sam had not intended on getting a pet of any kind, let alone one so big that she took up half the couch he once promised Deb he’d never let her sit on, but. She was a good dog, that was all. And she’d needed his help.

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Dylan Morrison @dylanthyme.bsky.social · 13/02/2026

malice has a variety of tells, but more than anything else, it *feels* different than even the most egregious case of well-meant fumbling. it feels different because it IS different! and we learn to distinguish because sometimes our lives literally depend on it. for the love of god, bro.

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Dylan Morrison @dylanthyme.bsky.social · 02/02/2026

i can't feel my face when i'm with you ("you" being "cleveland ohio for what feels like the last ten thousand years")

The "I've had enough of this dude" meme from It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia (Mac, Dennis and Charlie staring at a painting they're approaching to remove from the way, saying "I've had enough of this dude") with the current weather forecast laid over the image inside the picture frame. Said forecast predicts temperatures of 3, 0, 1, and 3 degrees Fahrenheit.

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Dylan Morrison @dylanthyme.bsky.social · 30/01/2026

omg i would DIE for lucy and her shocking fart betrayals!! i have no dog of my own, VERY TRAGICALLY, but i do have a dog brother (i.e. my parents' dog) who is an english mastiff the size of an actual tiger. his name is bob and he loves everyone and cheeseburgers. cheeseburgers maybe slightly more

Bob the dog, a brown and black brindle English Mastiff with chops that have gone white because he's an old man these days 😭 He is in his favorite position: doing an imitation of a slug

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Dylan Morrison @dylanthyme.bsky.social · 29/01/2026

this is how i found out they're making more ted lasso and i don't understand. smacks of (apologies for terrible meme quality but i am too lazy to dig around or pull together a better one)

Memed version of the scene in Parks & Rec where Jean-Ralphio sings "R to O to N and Swanson's got the swagger the size of Big Ben... clock," because he habitually cannot figure out the appropriate place to end the rhyme

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Dylan Morrison @dylanthyme.bsky.social · 29/01/2026

omg TELL ME OF THIS DOG?? [j jonah jameson voice] PICTURES OF DOG

The illustrated panel of a Spiderman comic featuring J Jonah Jameson smoking a cigar pounded on his desk, made famous as a meme

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Dylan Morrison @dylanthyme.bsky.social · 25/01/2026

brecht wrote this in 1945: twelve years after he fled nazi germany fearing persecution, and two years before he would flee the united states to escape the crosshairs of mccarthyism. thinking about it a lot these days.

bertolt brecht's "All Of Us Or None," a poem originally published in "Poetry: A Magazine of Verse" in 1945. It reads, in its entirety:
"Slave, who is it that shall free you?
Those in deepest darkness lying.
Comrade, only these can see you
Only they can hear you crying.
Comrade, only slaves can free you.
Everything or nothing. All of us or none.
One alone his lot can’t better.
Either gun or fetter.
Everything or nothing. All of us or none.

You who hunger, who shall feed you?
If it’s bread you would be carving,
Come to us, we too are starving.
Come to us and let us lead you.
Only hungry men can feed you.
Everything or nothing. All of us or none.
One alone his lot can’t better.
Either gun or fetter.
Everything or nothing. All of us or none.

Beaten man, who shall avenge you?
You, on whom the blows are falling,
Hear your wounded brothers calling.
Weakness gives us strength to lend you.
Come to us, we shall avenge you.
Everything or nothing. All of us or none.
One alone his lot can’t better.
Either gun or fetter.
Everything or nothing. All of us or none.

Who, oh wretched one, shall dare it?
He who can no longer bear it.
Counts the blows that arm his spirit.
Taught the time by need and sorrow,
Strikes today and not tomorrow.
Everything or nothing. All of us or none.
One alone his lot can’t better.
Either gun or fetter.
Everything or nothing. All of us or none."

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Dylan Morrison @dylanthyme.bsky.social · 19/01/2026

THE VAST MAJORITY OF THE FACULTY, STAFF AND STUDENTS AT UNSEEN UNIVERSITY: don't bother with AI, believing it to be another strange, incomprehensible angle of ponder stibbons' work PONDER STIBBONS:

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Dylan Morrison @dylanthyme.bsky.social · 11/01/2026

everyone loses something when the political headwinds blow due fascism! in my case, my patience appears to be rolling around in its final death throes on my lawn. this, like much of our currently reality, evokes the following feeling in me:

Image of a tweet from user Art Decider 2/@boring_as_heck. It reads:
"[mysterious old lady flips tarot card revealing a dude who looks exactly like me flying a hot air balloon into power lines]
Me: is that good"

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Dylan Morrison @dylanthyme.bsky.social · 03/01/2026

also interested in hearing from folks with a newfound appreciation for this one

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Dylan Morrison @dylanthyme.bsky.social · 28/12/2025

i can't hear any part of this song or see any mention of the person who sings it without imagining this. for those wondering which word schmidt mispronounces, it's 'beekeeping.' thank you for your time

NICK: hey cece, can you take that beans in the trap song off the bar playlist? i don't like the way it makes bearclaw dance.
CECE: sure, i'll -- hold on. did you say beans?
NICK: yeah. beans in the trap.
SCHMIDT: bees.
NICK: what?
SCHMIDT: BEES.
NICK: where?
SCHMIDT: in the song! it's not beans! it's bees.
NICK, LAUGHING: what?! do you even hear yourself? why would bees be in a trap?
SCHMIDT, GROWING ENRAGED: why would BEANS be in a trap?! when have you ever heard of a bean in a trap?!
NICK: see, now you're just telling me you don't know anything about farming--
SCHMIDT: farming?!? nicholas! she puts the BEES in the TRAP! it's beekeeping if it's anything--
CECE, TAKING A HUGE BREATH BEFORE SIGHING AND SHAKING HER HEAD: you know what? it's not worth it

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Dylan Morrison @dylanthyme.bsky.social · 12/12/2025

right i promise this is the last time i'm going to announce a book this year haha, however I DID WRITE ONE MORE. it comes out in may! it's full of love and warmth and feelings and jokes and deli sandwiches and a dog named pastrami! i hope you like it! in may! geni.us/1469-al-aut-ch

An image of an eBook with the Second Helpings cover on it, next to a wrapped sandwich. The Second Helpings cover is an illustration set against a periwinkle background, which shows a man with light brown hair sitting at a table, a cane hooked over the back of his chair, and another man with darker hair and wearing an apron holding a tray. Little yellow hearts appear around him, and a chalkboard reads "A queer m/m second chance romance."

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Dylan Morrison @dylanthyme.bsky.social · 03/11/2025

well, it's happened. i've been caught by my mailman pacing around on my porch in a fluffy robe trying to work out a plot point. little did my child self know, when he watched the princess diaries, that he would grow up to become this comic relief side character named for cough syrup

A still from 'The Princess Diaries' featuring the character Mr. Robutussin. You know, the next door neighbor writer guy? With the weird trashcans? Always wearing a robe? Scribbling frenetically and unsettling his neighbors? The brother of my very soul, as it turns out

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Dylan Morrison @dylanthyme.bsky.social · 31/10/2025

okay so while recipe for trouble def has a ~holiday vibe, it's... actually also a halloween book? LOOK HALLOWEEN IS A HOLIDAY. a holiday i love!! 🎃 👻 🧙‍♀️!! and as such, IN recipe for trouble you will find a halloween PARTY, and halloween COSTUMES, and, of course, halloween whatever-you'd-call-this:

“The next several hours are, honestly, a bit grueling. Ben was expecting his frustration to mount as he watches Pete, but instead Ben finds what swells within him is sympathy. The man has simply got problems; now that Ben knows how Pete usually cooks, and without any cuts for him to hide in, it’s a lot harder to find it funny.
Or, well. Okay. It is still… pretty funny. Ben feels guilty about it, but—there are moments, in spite of the strange knot of fellow feeling that seems to have sprouted in his chest since he last did this a week and a half ago, where he can’t help but let out a little laughter. Pete’s stupidly handsome face is so unusually expressive, for one thing, seeming to go rubbery with comical shock or dismay as he drops, spills, trips, and otherwise clatters his way around the kitchen he’d moved so easily in this morning. He’s making a Halloween cocktail and appetizer; the appetizer is a..."

Excerpt From
Recipe for Trouble
Dylan Morrison

“seven-layer dip with a spiderweb drawn on top in sour cream, although if one counted the layers Pete attempts to make, screws up, and grimly throws away, it would be more like a twenty-five-layer dip. But the drink—it’s a blueberry spritzer, and there must be some note somewhere that Pete needs to refer to it as a “Boo-Berry” spritzer, because between every actual take, captured on the long reel of uncut footage, is Jaelyn gently saying, “Okay, Pete, that was good, but could you try actually saying ‘Boo-Berry’ this time?”
But it becomes apparent, as the footage rolls on, that Pete cannot say “Boo-Berry.” Pete can say “blueberry,” and “blowberry,” and “blackberry,” and “boysenberry,” and “gooseberry,” and “bloo-bluh,” and several creative swear words, none of which sound like the word “Boo-Berry” at all. The frustration is obviously getting to him; on what has to be his thirtieth attempt to spit the pun out of his mouth, Pete’s composure snaps, and waving his knife in the air like a madman, he all but shrieks, “Blueberry—whoberry—whyberry! Why are we even doing a blueberry cocktail, blueberries aren’t even in season, no one has ever! In history! Thought, ‘Wow, it’s Halloween, I better have some “Boo-Berry” juice’—oh my God, tell me I didn’t finally get it right in that totally unusable take?” This, as it turns out, proves to be Ben’s breaking point as well, and he throws his head back and loses it laughing in spite of himself.”

Excerpt From
Recipe for Trouble
Dylan Morrison

“He has to pause the footage for a second to calm down and wipe his eyes, only to crack up again when, a few minutes later, Jaelyn appears in frame, glares, and grimly mouths, “No cuts, huh?” into the camera.
But actually, when Ben gets to the end of the footage, he opens up the email she sent him and types a quick reply: Haha. You owe me $20. He doesn’t regret the “no cuts” call at all. Pete’s—bad, still, of course, abominably bad, and it’s harder to watch than the last round because sometimes, between attempts at demonstrating very basic cooking skills that Ben is now sure he could typically do drunk and half-dead and with his eyes closed, he looks truly wretched. It must, Ben can’t help but think, be incredibly frust-"

Excerpt From
Recipe for Trouble
Dylan Morrison

“rating for him, to so abruptly be unable to access this skill that seems to be woven into his bedrock most of the time.
But the lack of cuts helps. Pete is still comically awful, awkward and forgetting what he’s doing and ruining so many different dip layers that even Ben loses track of them. Even something as simple as guacamole proves a challenge: Somehow he manages to drown the first batch in so much lime juice that it’s inedibly sour, oversalt the second round beyond the point of saving, and, without realizing it, accidentally dump so much cayenne pepper into the third that it renders the next fifteen minutes of footage borderline unusable, since it’s just Pete jumping around in anguish, drinking water, drinking milk, panting, drinking more milk, cursing the heavens, and glaring at the bottle of cayenne pepper as though he intends to remember its sins here today.
Still, though, he’s not as bad as he was, by the end of that first round of footage. Even in his haze of semi-drunk self-righteousness, Ben had not used any of the last half hour of what was sent for the initial video. It had felt wrong, too personal. Even if Pete had been affecting his camera-triggered incompetence, which Ben now knows he was not, those last thirty minutes would have been him reaching a place within himself that Ben can’t imagine anyone wanting broadcast out to the internet. His nervousness, or stage fright, or whatever you wanted to call it, had become so bad after hours and hours of hearing “Cut! Reset to go again!” that he was truly barely coherent. On his first watch Ben had turned it off, wincing, when Pete said, “It—that’s—kale! The salad!” and then blinked blankly into the camera as though trying to remember why, exactly, that wasn’t an appropriate sentence.”

Excerpt From
Recipe for Trouble
Dylan Morrison

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Dylan Morrison @dylanthyme.bsky.social · 22/10/2025

we can't get back the men we've 'lost' to these horrific ideologies because we never had them in the first place. it's been 84 years but dorothy thompson still says it best at the end of 'who goes nazi," which you should read if you haven't. the link: harpers.org/archive/1941... . the quote:

Kind, good, happy, gentlemanly, secure people never go Nazi. They may be the gentle philosopher whose name is in the Blue Book, or Bill from City College to whom democracy gave a chance to design airplanes—you’ll never make Nazis out of them. But the frustrated and humiliated intellectual, the rich and scared speculator, the spoiled son, the labor tyrant, the fellow who has achieved success by smelling out the wind of success—they would all go Nazi in a crisis.

Believe me, nice people don’t go Nazi. Their race, color, creed, or social condition is not the criterion. It is something in them.

Those who haven’t anything in them to tell them what they like and what they don’t—whether it is breeding, or happiness, or wisdom, or a code, however old-fashioned or however modern, go Nazi. It’s an amusing game. Try it at the next big party you go to.

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Dylan Morrison @dylanthyme.bsky.social · 18/10/2025

for pratchett fans, a related quote and a related passage, which are from separate works, but at their best together. the quote, from sir terry's forward to the ultimate encyclopedia of fantasy: "stories of imagination tend to upset those without one." and the passage, from hogfather:

“All right," said Susan. "I'm not stupid. You're saying humans need... fantasies to make life bearable."

REALLY? AS IF IT WAS SOME KIND OF PINK PILL? NO. HUMANS NEED FANTASY TO BE HUMAN. TO BE THE PLACE WHERE THE FALLING ANGEL MEETS THE RISING APE.

"Tooth fairies? Hogfathers? Little—"

YES. AS PRACTICE. YOU HAVE TO START OUT LEARNING TO BELIEVE THE LITTLE LIES.

"So we can believe the big ones?"

YES. JUSTICE. MERCY. DUTY. THAT SORT OF THING.

"They're not the same at all!"

YOU THINK SO? THEN TAKE THE UNIVERSE AND GRIND IT DOWN TO THE FINEST POWDER AND SIEVE IT THROUGH THE FINEST SIEVE AND THEN SHOW ME ONE ATOM OF JUSTICE, ONE MOLECULE OF MERCY. AND YET — Death waved a hand. AND YET YOU ACT AS IF THERE IS SOME IDEAL ORDER IN THE WORLD, AS IF THERE IS SOME... SOME RIGHTNESS IN THE UNIVERSE BY WHICH IT MAY BE JUDGED.

"Yes, but people have got to believe that, or what's the point — “

MY POINT EXACTLY.

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Dylan Morrison @dylanthyme.bsky.social · 18/10/2025

if you're going to start an awkward convo -- one that risks putting the other party in an uncomfortable position -- it's on you to make sure they're not trapped first. not in a moving car! at their job! mid-MRI! etc. human dignity lives in everyone being able to follow the pictured advice as needed

The original HIT DA BRICKS meme. Features a walking skeleton over the words "JUST WALK OUT. you can leave!!! work, social thing, movies, home, class, dentist, clothes shoppi, too fancy weed store, cops if your quick, friend ships. IF IT SUCKS... HIT DA BRICKS. real winners quit"

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Dylan Morrison @dylanthyme.bsky.social · 16/10/2025

RECIPE FOR TROUBLE is OUT TODAY! in ebook/audio/print a.co/d/ee50VJW! but you can also find it via bookshop.org, b&n, libro.fm, many places! talking up my own work is not an area of strength! i hope you enjoy my loving queer homage to the golden age of romcoms in this trying time!

An ereader on top of a cutting board against a green checkered towel. The screen shows the cover of Recipe for Trouble by Dylan Morrison, which features two men cooking against a dark periwinkle background.

A 5-star reader review! 'One of the top non-spicy MM romances I've read over the last year. I loved this book! It warmed my heart.' There's also a small image of the cover of Recipe for Trouble by Dylan Morrison, which features two men cooking against a dark periwinkle background.

A 5-star reader review! 'This book should absolutely be savoured, mouthful by delicious mouthful, but I've never had much restraint and so I just gobbled it right up in two days and I do not regret my life choices.' There's also a small image of the cover of Recipe for Trouble by Dylan Morrison, which features two men cooking against a dark periwinkle background.

A 5-star reader review! 'An utterly compelling, emotionally layered, highly original romance, which manages to be both laugh-out-loud funny and heartache-inducing.' There's also a small image of the cover of Recipe for Trouble by Dylan Morrison, which features two men cooking against a dark periwinkle background.

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Dylan Morrison @dylanthyme.bsky.social · 13/10/2025

thank you so much!! my writing process is best encapsulated by the comic below (haha! 🫠) so it always THRILLS me to hear i have PRODUCED LAUGHS 💜 i hope the rest brings you similar joy!!

A 15 panel comic by artist Tom Gould. It shows a writer typing, thinking "Haha. This is funny." Over the next several panels they begin to experience doubt, thinking "Maybe not hilarious, but funny." And then, "It is sort of funny." And then, "It seemed funny when I thought of it." And then, "Maybe it's not funny." And then, "No, it IS funny." And then, "I'm really very sure it's funny." And then, "Definitely." In the last image we see of the writer, they are sitting pensively and saying nothing, obviously still unsure. In the final panel of the comic, however, we see the reader holding the book and saying simply, "Haha."

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Dylan Morrison @dylanthyme.bsky.social · 13/10/2025

TWO! DAYS! TIL BOOK DAY! let me take you away from all this (the stresses and horrors of the dystopian present) to a better place (still full of stresses and horrors, but only for the characters, and with much lower stakes). excerpt so you can give it a vibe check! geni.us/1204-al-aut-am

"The guy in the video—Pete—is handsome in that relaxed, unin‐
tentional way Ben associates with people who had a great time in
high school. There’s something about him that’s almost familiar,
and he looks older than Ben, in probably his early thirties. His dark
wavy hair, faded tight on the sides and left longer on top, clearly
just lies that way, in the sort of easy dishevelment no one can pull
o$ when they’re trying. As if all that wasn’t enough, he’s broad
shouldered and well muscled—not a full gym rat like Ben some‐
times pulls on Grindr, but de!nitely visibly toned. It’s a look Ben
associates with rock climbers, although admittedly that may be
situational bias, because he is also wearing the type of T-shirt-with-
sleeves-cut-o$ Ben associates with rock climbers. However, the
idiot has distinguished himself from the pack by electing to do this
to a shirt with Ask Me About Canned Beans scrawled across
the front in a gigantic, hideous font.
And Pete is, above anything else, an idiot. Sure—he’s a little bit
hot. Ben can admit that to himself, here in the safe anonymity of
the New York City subway system, where anything could happen
and does, every day. Pete is a little bit hot. That doesn’t make it
okay that somehow, despite having presumably been a talented
enough chef to land one of the coveted, cushy positions as a
Gastronome test cook, he has produced what has to be the single
worst collection of cooking footage ever created by man.
“Hi!” Pete says, waving at the camera, in the !rst take. But he's"

"holding a spoon in his waving hand, and it goes !ying and hits
someone nearly out of frame in the back of the head, and they yelp,
and someone else o" camera yells “CUT.” With no pause for
recovery, it’s the next take, and Pete says, “Hi! I’m Pat,” and then,
“Wait, no I’m not,” and then, nervously, like he’s not quite sure it’s
the right answer, “Pete? I’m… Pete.” They cut again, and then it’s
the hideous take after that, in which Pete holds up a bunch of
greens and says, “This is kelp—kelp—KALE. Good God. But could
we make it with kelp, do you think? I never thought about kelp—
aw, wait, these are collards, actually. Uh. Are we still rolling?”
Ben misses his train. It goes whooshing by as Pete very
earnestly tells the viewers that he thinks everyone can learn to cook
while, next to him, a piece of notebook paper that clearly reads,
DEAR PETE, REMEMBER: BUY TARRAGON, TOILET
PAPER. NO MORE HOISIN! LOVE PETE inches towards the
stove. It catches $re at the same moment Ben realizes that it’s a
local 1 train pulling away, and he releases a little gasp of surprised
annoyance in the exact moment that Pete does on-screen.
That disquieting moment of similarity is enough to get Ben to
close the computer. He tells himself he’s not going to open it again
until he has his mysterious mixed drink in his hand to dull the pain
but only lasts $ve minutes before he $nds himself reaching for the
laptop again. An express 2 train chooses that exact moment to turn
up, running as always on a secret schedule known only to itself,
which is all that saves Ben from spending the next several hours on
the platform. Instead, he spends the standing-room-only ride back
to his apartment stewing about the video, and how on earth Pete
even got a job, and how on earth he, Ben, is supposed to do his job
and edit this nightmare into watchable content."

The Recipe for Trouble cover (two men cooking together against a periwinkle background) displayed on an ereader, sitting on top of a cutting board and a green gingham towel. Blue text on a yellow circle to the right of the ereader reads "PRE-ORDER NOW."

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Dylan Morrison @dylanthyme.bsky.social · 30/09/2025

does being trans in the US Right Now, w/ a queer romcom out in 2 weeks, feel like inching closer to a woodchipper in a clown costume? SURE. does this make it impossible to write promo posts? YES! am i forcing myself to throw my preorder link here before i 🧵 about this? BARELY: geni.us/1204-al-aut-am

COMING 16 OCTOBER 2025 [Image of blue book cover, Recipe for Trouble by Dylan Morrison, featuring two men cooking against a green backdrop with sparkles.]

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Dylan Morrison @dylanthyme.bsky.social · 29/09/2025

(the above delivered with utmost respect for both the post below, which will never leave me as long as i live, and for the wayback machine which allowed me to find it again in the benighted present lmao)

A screenshot of a tweet from 7 Sep 2019 from user MALTSCHLITZMANN that reads "bro no bro don't make a gallant entrance by slicing down the mainsail with a dulled knife. bro we need that mainsail for sailing. bro you've becalmed us in the sargasso. bro i wish you had considered the ramifications of your actions ONCE bro. PLEASE."

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Dylan Morrison @dylanthyme.bsky.social · 25/09/2025

this whole piece is deeply worth reading and sharing, especially with the centrist dems and liberals in your life, but this penultimate graf really sums it up. you just can't play these kinds of games with people's lives.

Screenshot of a paragraph pulled from the linked article: "The implication here seems to be that Democrats can turn a big dial that says “transphobia” on it to some ideal level—that there’s a sweet spot of anti-trans discrimination that everyone can be content with. (Everyone, presumably, except trans people themselves.) But the events of the past year should have put that idea to rest. Democrats and centrists have been distancing themselves from trans people—indeed, top Democratic figures like Chuck Schumer will barely say the word “trans”—and the only forces that have benefited are the forces of anti-trans fascism. You can’t just play these kinds of games with people’s lives."

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Dylan Morrison @dylanthyme.bsky.social · 11/09/2025

it seems there's no non-weird time to do this in 2025 but the posts must go on, so: i have new book, RECIPE FOR TROUBLE, coming out next month! it's available now on netgalley and for preorder! it's full of laughs and queer joy! but, FAIR WARNING, it may make you hungry 🤤 geni.us/1204-al-aut-am

The Recipe For Trouble cover, which features two dark haired men cooking a pot of soup, displayed on an ebook next to two bowls of soup and the words PRE-ORDER NOW.

The Recipe For Trouble cover, which features two dark haired men cooking a pot of soup, displayed on an ebook against a yellow background printed with cooking utensils, and the words REQUEST NOW ON NETGALLEY.

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Dylan Morrison @dylanthyme.bsky.social · 26/07/2025

ME THIS MORNING: oooo i think had a really wild dream last night! and if i remember right, it was such a cool one that i actually wrote it down in the little notebook i keep by the bed and never remember to use! let's see what my dreams had to say ME LAST NIGHT, HELPFULLY:

An open notebook page on which the words "Bats - cute but scary" are scrawled in the messy and borderline unreadable scrawl of the mostly asleep.

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Dylan Morrison @dylanthyme.bsky.social · 18/06/2025

BOOK DAY! BOOK DAY! By which I mean, FALL INTO YOU, my first M/M romance novel, is out RIGHT NOW in ebook, print and audiobook!! If you are perhaps seeking a story that is WARM and UPLIFTING and QUEER in these trying times, i'd be thrilled and honored if you gave mine a shot 💜

An image of a Kindle displaying the Fall Into You cover with granny smith apples and a green towel against the left hand side.

A 5-star reader review: "This book is like a warm hug and a therapy session rolled into one. The final chapter is one of the most beautiful I've read in a long time."

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Dylan Morrison @dylanthyme.bsky.social · 03/06/2025

And hey, if you're on NetGalley and would be interested in reading/reviewing a few weeks ahead of the June 18th release, I'd be thrilled and honored for you to take a look! You can request a copy right here www.netgalley.co.uk/catalog/book... 💜

An image of the Fall Into You cover on an e-reader, against a backdrop of red, illustrated apples.

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Dylan Morrison @dylanthyme.bsky.social · 03/06/2025

Speaking of Fall Into You, did you know that it's available for preorder? And that you can click through to do that right here? And that it's a truth universally acknowledged that ordering one of their books is amongst the very best birthday gifts you can get for a writer? geni.us/1201-al-aut-am

An image of the Fall Into You cover on a Kindle, with granny smith apples in the background.

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Dylan Morrison @dylanthyme.bsky.social · 03/06/2025

HI AGAIN. Today is my 36th birthday, and because life is both cool and weird, it's also the birthday of the cover of Fall Into You! To say I'm obsessed with it would be an understatement -- the COLORS! the STYLE! my BOYS! -- and I hope you like it as much as I do 🍏💜🍎

A blue book cover with yellow font reading "FALL INTO YOU" and an illustration of the two main characters -- one blonde man in flannel, one dark-haired man in a sweater -- leaning against an apple tree.

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Dylan Morrison @dylanthyme.bsky.social · 25/05/2025

another year, another glorious 25th of may. hard to know what to say in these punishingly interesting times, but i remain absolutely all in on truth, freedom, justice, reasonably priced love, and a hard boiled egg. gnu terry pratchett.

One of the hardest lessons in young Sam's life had been finding out that the people in charge weren't in charge. It had been finding out that governments were not, on the whole, staffed by people who had a grip, and that plans were what people made instead of thinking.
-Terry Pratchett, Night Watch

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Dylan Morrison @dylanthyme.bsky.social · 28/04/2025

hi hello, me again! so excited to say 🍎 FALL INTO YOU 🍎 is officially available for preorder! is this image the real cover? NO, the real cover is IN PROGRESS, i can't wait to show you. but the words are a REAL SUMMARY of what to expect from this book! tinyurl.com/4j8by39k / tinyurl.com/4nzwwv54

"Fall Into You" temporary holding cover. It's text on an off white background, reading "Final Cover Coming Soon / Fall into You / Dylan Morrison."

Black text on white background, reading: "Nearly twenty years ago, Will Robertson ran out on his destiny, leaving his family farm and everything he was supposed to become behind. So when he's forced back to small-town Glenriver, Ohio and finds the farm's irritatingly handsome manager Casey Reeves living more happily in his childhood home than he ever did, it's only natural that they hate each other immediately.

Will's plan is simple: sell his late father's apple farm and get back to his carefully constructed life in Chicago. But when a collapsed bridge strands him in Glenriver with Casey, "simple" goes right out the window – along with Will's determination to keep his distance from both his past and the man right in front of him.

Between corporate vultures circling, long-buried family secrets coming to light, and the undeniable spark growing between them, Will and Casey will have to decide if some things really are worth fighting for… and if two people who seem totally wrong for each other might actually be exactly right."

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Dylan Morrison @dylanthyme.bsky.social · 19/03/2025

turns out the trick to good pickles is in fact to make them in your most entertaining jar

A jar of homemade pickles. The jar itself is being repurposed and reads, "CREAM-NUT Smooth Natural Peanut Butter"

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