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Dimitri Allen

@dimitriallen.bsky.social
144 followers 125 following 1.9K posts

Scientist and amateur bartender (Parody account)

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Dimitri Allen @dimitriallen.bsky.social · 25/06/2025
Sorry, I’ve been trapped between states of being where I’m adrift in the void and not quite conscious for months at a time. Grindr isn’t quite the first thing on my mind when I come back to myself. I’ll respond to you soon.
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Dimitri Allen @dimitriallen.bsky.social · 25/06/2025
And here I came to support you. Sigh, I suppose I’ll take my leave. Clearly my presence isn’t appreciated…
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Dimitri Allen @dimitriallen.bsky.social · 25/06/2025
How cruel, Paul. How cruel.
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Dimitri Allen @dimitriallen.bsky.social · 25/06/2025
The girls are fightinggggg
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Dimitri Allen @dimitriallen.bsky.social · 06/06/2025
Oh, how fascinating! I do hope we’re friends in ever reality.
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Dimitri Allen @dimitriallen.bsky.social · 06/06/2025
So you really aren’t from around here, then. You look human enough. It’s nice to meet you. My name is Dimitri Allen.
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Dimitri Allen @dimitriallen.bsky.social · 06/06/2025
Haha! I could say the same.. I have to assume that you’re not just MY Claire in a different outfit, then.
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Dimitri Allen @dimitriallen.bsky.social · 06/06/2025
And who is this?
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Dimitri Allen @dimitriallen.bsky.social · 06/06/2025
Hello, my dear boy! Where have you been?
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Dimitri Allen @dimitriallen.bsky.social · 26/05/2025
Theodore, there you are!
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Dimitri Allen @dimitriallen.bsky.social · 24/05/2025
… oh dear. Maybe I should tell Claire about this? …… …
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Dimitri Allen @dimitriallen.bsky.social · 24/05/2025
I know. I know you probably didn’t mean to. But the machine was a lot of work. I don’t mean to make you feel guilty, nor am i upset with you. I just feel.. odd. Seeing it broken. Truly broken, and not just inactive.
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Dimitri Allen @dimitriallen.bsky.social · 24/05/2025
The- ah, the Time Machine is broken. As is the wall.
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Dimitri Allen @dimitriallen.bsky.social · 24/05/2025
no, no. everything’s alright. I’m sorry. What’s next? What tests were we going to run?
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Dimitri Allen @dimitriallen.bsky.social · 24/05/2025
… it’s nothing. Don’t fret about it.
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Dimitri Allen @dimitriallen.bsky.social · 24/05/2025
Hm…
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Dimitri Allen @dimitriallen.bsky.social · 24/05/2025
.. Hershel?
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Dimitri Allen @dimitriallen.bsky.social · 24/05/2025
………… ………………
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Dimitri Allen @dimitriallen.bsky.social · 24/05/2025
…….. Sorry.
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Dimitri Allen @dimitriallen.bsky.social · 24/05/2025
I wouldn’t really have known if you hadn’t told me, though perhaps I’m just not too observant.
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Dimitri Allen @dimitriallen.bsky.social · 24/05/2025
…
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Dimitri Allen @dimitriallen.bsky.social · 24/05/2025
Ah- haha, sorry about that. Ignore me.
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Dimitri Allen @dimitriallen.bsky.social · 24/05/2025
Everything is always my fault.
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Dimitri Allen @dimitriallen.bsky.social · 24/05/2025
You’re- oh my god I didn’t even notice! Congratulations! I also hope this doesn’t cause any problems.
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Dimitri Allen @dimitriallen.bsky.social · 24/05/2025
Hm. Interesting. So all of this truly isn’t my fault. Where would you like to go?
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Dimitri Allen @dimitriallen.bsky.social · 24/05/2025
I hope you don’t die. That would be terribly unfortunate for all of us. Is there anything I can do? Ice packs, first aid kit? What do you need from me?
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Dimitri Allen @dimitriallen.bsky.social · 24/05/2025
Who is Randall? And you said that you’re cursed?
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Dimitri Allen @dimitriallen.bsky.social · 24/05/2025
You’re in two places at once? Fascinating. Fascinating… terribly sorry about your crash. Does it affect your form here?
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Dimitri Allen @dimitriallen.bsky.social · 24/05/2025
… I have goosebumps. It’s not all that cold in here…
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Dimitri Allen @dimitriallen.bsky.social · 24/05/2025
Where did you come from? Here- could you climb up onto my hand? It would be easier than picking you up, and likely more comfortable for transport.
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Dimitri Allen @dimitriallen.bsky.social · 24/05/2025
I don’t know. Nowhere, perhaps? Where have you been?
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Dimitri Allen @dimitriallen.bsky.social · 24/05/2025
….. ……….
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Dimitri Allen @dimitriallen.bsky.social · 24/05/2025
…yes, dear.
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Dimitri Allen @dimitriallen.bsky.social · 24/05/2025
That was sarcasm by the way. Most problems are caused by me these days. I’m glad this one isn’t though.
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Dimitri Allen @dimitriallen.bsky.social · 24/05/2025
That’s great! I love not being the sole cause of every single problem in everyone’s lives!
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Dimitri Allen @dimitriallen.bsky.social · 24/05/2025
Hi. How are you. How did you get in my house.
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Dimitri Allen @dimitriallen.bsky.social · 24/05/2025
So we’re trying to power back on the house so that we can run tests. Is this another time travel problem that I caused…?
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Dimitri Allen @dimitriallen.bsky.social · 24/05/2025
I mean- haha! You talk ! Hello there.
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Dimitri Allen @dimitriallen.bsky.social · 24/05/2025
What the fucking shit.
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Dimitri Allen @dimitriallen.bsky.social · 24/05/2025
Ah, I see. That’s- it might be a bit of an adjustment for me. I hope you don’t mind if I call you Claire one-on-one?
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Dimitri Allen @dimitriallen.bsky.social · 24/05/2025
You don’t look like a normal worm.. Why am I talking to myself?? I sound like an idiot.
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Dimitri Allen @dimitriallen.bsky.social · 24/05/2025
??? Saria? Did you make a new friend while I was gone?
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Dimitri Allen @dimitriallen.bsky.social · 24/05/2025
… …..
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Dimitri Allen @dimitriallen.bsky.social · 24/05/2025
Hopefully that means he’s wherever we were… and not in danger. So, what’s happening now?
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Dimitri Allen @dimitriallen.bsky.social · 24/05/2025
We’ve been gone for a month?? Oh dear god- is Theodore alright? Where is he??
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Dimitri Allen @dimitriallen.bsky.social · 24/05/2025
Did the power go out? It’s not storming or anything.
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Dimitri Allen @dimitriallen.bsky.social · 24/05/2025
A month? What do you mean? We were working on it the other day?
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Dimitri Allen @dimitriallen.bsky.social · 24/05/2025
Oh. Hello. Did you.. need something? Where’s Claire? I didn’t know we had a guest. My apologies.
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Dimitri Allen @dimitriallen.bsky.social · 24/05/2025
Huh… The house is dark…? Did the power go out?
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Dimitri Allen @dimitriallen.bsky.social · 26/04/2025
Of course he would! Did I upset you? Why are you crying..?
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