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Reposted by DENVER’S FUCKING WEATHER

DENVER’S FUCKING WEATHER @denversweather.bsky.social · 27/09/2026

DEAR 80-DEGREE HIGHS, I'D LIKE TO SAY "IT'S NOT YOU," BUT IT IS. YOUR SEASON IS FINISHED, YOUR TIME IS THROUGH, BUT YET, YOU STICK AROUND. WHY? WHO WANTS YOU HERE?? YOU'RE ANNOYING, UNCOMFORTABLE, AND IT'S JUST GETTING WEIRD. PLEASE LEAVE, SINCERELY, THE PEOPLE OF DENVER

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DENVER’S FUCKING WEATHER @denversweather.bsky.social · 5h

DENVER, THIS IS FUCKED. NOTHING BUT 80°'s FOR THE WEEKEND AND AS FAR AS THE FORECAST CAN SEE. THOSE FAT CATS UP AT BOULDER'S NWS MUST BE LAUGHING THEIR ASSES OFF! FUCK THEM, FUCK THIS, FUCK IT ALL. FRI: 83°/55° NOPE SAT: 86°/52° NOPE SUN: 83°/56° NOPE AGAIN

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DENVER’S FUCKING WEATHER @denversweather.bsky.social · 27/09/2026

DENVER, SURE WE CAN SOMETIMES FEEL FALL IN THE AIR BUT DAMMIT WE DESERVE TO ALWAYS FEEL FALL IN THE AIR. GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY FORECAST, 80-DEGREE HIGHS! GO BACK TO ARIZONA!! SUN: 84°/61° MON: 72°/57° TUE: 65°/54° WED: 67°/52° RAIN THU: 69°/48° AM RAIN HELLO OCTOBER FRI: 76°/49°

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DENVER’S FUCKING WEATHER @denversweather.bsky.social · 27/09/2026

NOW THINKING "RIPPED, TANKED, THROTTLED... BUT STILL HORNY (A SEQUEL)" WILL BE MY TELL-ALL FOLLOW-UP

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DENVER’S FUCKING WEATHER @denversweather.bsky.social · 25/09/2026

DENVER WE MAY BE DONE WITH SUMMER BUT.... SUMMER'S NOT DONE WITH US. THE SUBTEXT HERE IS THE WEATHER GODS ARE BORED / SOBER / HORNY AND BLAME US FOR ALL THAT... I MEAN I GET IT, IT'S THE WORST WAY TO BE... AND ALL THREE OF THOSE TOGETHER? YIKES FRI: 73°/55° THUNDERSTORMS? SAT: 85°/55° SUN: 85°/59°

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DENVER’S FUCKING WEATHER @denversweather.bsky.social · 20/09/2026

DENVER THIS IS AS CLOSE AS WE'VE GOTTEN TO A PERFECT FALL-TEMPERATURE WEEK AND KNOW WHAT? THAT'S A MOTHERFUCKING WIN. SUNDAY AND MONDAY ARE PARTICULARLY BEAUTIFUL. SUN: 74°/53° MON: 76°/53° TUE: 79°/58° WED: 78°/56° THU: 78°/55° FRI: 79°/55°

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DENVER’S FUCKING WEATHER @denversweather.bsky.social · 18/09/2026

HOLY FUKKIN SHIT @weatherpeens.bsky.social IS ON BLUESKY AND HAS BEEN FOR YEARS I HAVE BEEN NEGLECT IN FLAGGING PEENS IN THE WEATHER BUT THAT TRAVESTY ENDS NOW.

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DENVER’S FUCKING WEATHER @denversweather.bsky.social · 18/09/2026

DENVER THE SUMMER IS DYING ... A SLOW FUCKING DEATH. HURRY UP AND DIE YOU SHIT. FRI: 82°/57° THUNDER THUNDER SAT: 79°/53° THUNDER THUNDER SUN: 73°/52° FUCKING LOVE THIS FOR US

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DENVER’S FUCKING WEATHER @denversweather.bsky.social · 13/09/2026

DENVER, WE DESERVE BETTER THAN THE HEAT WE'VE BEEN HAVING AND TUESDAY, THAT BETTER IS DELIVERED. SURE WE'VE GOT INTERMITTENT THUNDERSTORMS MID-WEEK BUT HOLY HELL I'VE BEEN WAITING FOR A DAY LIKE TUESDAY TOOOOO FUKKIN LONG SUN: 93°/68° MON: 87°/55° TUE: 73°/56° WED: 81°/61° THU: 78°/60° FRI: 82°/57°

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DENVER’S FUCKING WEATHER @denversweather.bsky.social · 11/09/2026

DENVER THE HOT-ASS BULLSHIT CONTINUES. WE DESERVE BETTER THAN THIS! FUCK CLIMATE CHANGE! FUCK THOSE WHO IGNORE CLIMATE CHANGE!! FRI: 92°/57° FUCK THIS SAT: 84°/58° SURE FUCK THAT SUN: 93°/66° FUCK THIS FOR SURE

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DENVER’S FUCKING WEATHER @denversweather.bsky.social · 08/09/2026

I DON'T KNOW WHY CLIMATE CHANGE IS PISSING ME OFF SO MUCH LATELY ... OH WAIT, I DO: FALL TEMPERATURES IN DENVER WILL BE 4 DEGREES WARMER THAN AVERAGE ACCORDING TO www.climatecentral.org/climate-loca...

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DENVER’S FUCKING WEATHER @denversweather.bsky.social · 06/09/2026

DENVER IT IS SEPTEMBER AND WE DESERVE BETTER THAN THIS. YES I KNOW WE LIVE IN COLORADO. YES I CAN AND WILL BITCH ABOUT THIS CRAP. YOUR FUCKING BULLSHIT: SUN: 91°/67° MON: 90°/63° TUE: 89°/60° WED: 84°/59° THU: 92°/62° FRI: 92°/61°

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DENVER’S FUCKING WEATHER @denversweather.bsky.social · 04/09/2026

DENVER, THIS IS SOME BULLSHIT. WE GET A HANDFUL OF THREE DAY WEEKENDS EVERY YEAR. BUT FOR SOOOOME REASON, ON THIS ONE, THE FAT CATS UP AT BOULDER'S NWS TOOK A JUICY SHIT-SPLOOGE ALL OVER WITH THIS UNREASONABLE, UNSEASONABLE 90-PLUS DEGREE WEEKEND. FRI: 94°/65° SAT: 93°/65° SUN: 92°/67° MON: 90°/64°

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DENVER’S FUCKING WEATHER @denversweather.bsky.social · 30/08/2026

DENVER IT'S STILL HOT OUT BUT WELL I GUESS IT COULD BE HOTTER? I MEAN, FUCK THE SUN FOREVER, AND FUCK WHATEVER DEGREE OR TWO CLIMATE CHANGE IS ADDING HERE.... THINK OF HOW NICE THE WORLD WOULD BE WITHOUT THAT SHIT.... SUN: 86°/64° MON: 83°/63° TUE: 84°/62° WED: 89°/61° THU: 92°/61° FRI: 92°/64°

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DENVER’S FUCKING WEATHER @denversweather.bsky.social · 28/08/2026

DENVER IT'S A LITTLE BIT SCORCHY OUT THERE FOR MY LIKINGS, AND IT'S ONLY GETTING SCORCHIER... SOMEBODY NEEDS TO ASK THE WEATHER GODS TO TUNE IT DOWN A LITTLE MAMMA'S GOT SOME YARD WORK TO DO THIS WEEKEND. FRI: 94°/67° SAT: 90°/65° SUN: 88°/64°

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Reposted by DENVER’S FUCKING WEATHER

DENVER’S FUCKING WEATHER @denversweather.bsky.social · 23/08/2026

DENVER THE THREAT OF THUNDERSTORMS HANGS OVER THIS ENTIRE WEEK, BUT OTHER THAN THAT SHIT'S MORE OR LESS FINE, NOTHIN TO COMPLAIN ABOUT, CARRY ON ETC YOUR FUCKING WEATHER: SUN: 93°/67° MON: 91°/64° TUE: 88°/62° WED: 86°/62° THU: 90°/63° FRI: 93°/65°

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DENVER’S FUCKING WEATHER @denversweather.bsky.social · 23/08/2026

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DENVER’S FUCKING WEATHER @denversweather.bsky.social · 21/08/2026

DENVER IT'S A SCORCHY ONE TODAY, I'D LOVE TO TELL YOU THIS IS LAST OF THE UPPER-90 DEGREE TEMPERATURES BUT WE ALL KNOW THE ULTRAHEAT CAN STRIKE AT ANY TIME (MAY THROUGH OCTOBER). YOUR FUCKING WEEKEND: FRI: 98°/67° FUCK THIS SAT: 91°/65° SUN: 90°/67°

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DENVER’S FUCKING WEATHER @denversweather.bsky.social · 18/08/2026

Been a while since I said this but Rockies… yikes

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DENVER’S FUCKING WEATHER @denversweather.bsky.social · 16/08/2026

DENVER WHO'S UP FUCKING EARLY? THAT'S GOOD, BECAUSE TODAY (AND THIS MORNING IN PARTICULAR) IS THE BEST IT GONNA GET. A LIL' HOT THE REST OF THE WEEK, A LIL' WET, BUT IT'S AUGUST SO FUCKING DEAL. SUN: 83°/61° MAYBE STORMS MON: 92°/66° TUE: 94°/65° WED: 89°/63° MAYBE STORMS THU: 89°/65° FRI: 95°/65°

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DENVER’S FUCKING WEATHER @denversweather.bsky.social · 16/08/2026

HOPE EVERYONE IS HAVING A SAFE AND ENJOYABLE WEEKEND SO FAR. — YOUR FRIEND, DENVER'S FUCKING WEATHER

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DENVER’S FUCKING WEATHER @denversweather.bsky.social · 14/08/2026

HOLY SHITFIRE SUCCOTASH, FIVE PM CANNOT COME SOON ENOUGH SOMEONE GET ME OUT OF HERE

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DENVER’S FUCKING WEATHER @denversweather.bsky.social · 14/08/2026

DENVER WE'RE NOT SETTING ANY RECORDS, THIS ISH IS OVERALL AUGUST-MILD SURE THERE ARE STORMS ON THE WAY BUT NOTHING WE CAN'T HANDLE (UNLESS YOU'RE A FUKKIN MOGWAI). PARTY ON WAYNE (PARTY ON GARTH). FRI: 84°/63° EVENING STORMS SAT: 81°/61° MAYBE EVENING STORMS SUN: 84°/62° COULD BE EVENING STORMS

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DENVER’S FUCKING WEATHER @denversweather.bsky.social · 13/08/2026

HOLY HELL IT IS 71 DEGREES OUT AND IT AIN'T GETTIN MUCH HOTTER TODAY, DENVER. WHOEVER WAS WITH THE WEATHER GODS LAST NIGHT THANK YOU THANK YOU WHAT'S YOUR IG (DM ME THX)

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DENVER’S FUCKING WEATHER @denversweather.bsky.social · 09/08/2026

DENVER I SEE HOPE IN THE FORECAST, BIG UPS TO THE WEATHER GODS (IN THEIR SLUTTY SUMMER OUTFITS) FOR THAT THURSDAY COOL-OFF, NO THANKS FOR THE EARLY WEEK THO THIS ULTRAHEAT CAN SUCK MY ULTRADICK. SUN: 97°/68° MON: 96°/68° TUE: 96°/69° WED: 90°/65° STORMS THU: 82°/63° STORMS FRI: 81°/62° STORMS

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DENVER’S FUCKING WEATHER @denversweather.bsky.social · 09/08/2026

YOU MAY HAVE NOTICED BUT I'M USING THE WORD "ULTRAHEAT" I KNOW WE'VE HAD 90° AND 100° DAYS BEFORE BUT WE'RE HAVING THEM MORE ( SOURCE www.climatecentral.org/climate-loca... ) AND THAT'S BECAUSE OF CLIMATE CHANGE AND THAT'S WHY I'M USING THE TERM ULTRAHEAT. #ULTRAHEAT.

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DENVER’S FUCKING WEATHER @denversweather.bsky.social · 08/08/2026

HELL YES THIS RAIN STAY FOREVER SAVE US FROM THE ULTRAHEAT

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DENVER’S FUCKING WEATHER @denversweather.bsky.social · 07/08/2026

DENVER, THE ULTRAHEAT IS BACK ON ITS BULLSHIT AND WE'VE GOT NOBODY TO BLAME BUT GREENHOUSE GASSES, CAPITALISM, AND THE FUCKING OIL COMPANIES. FUCK 'EM ALL. FRI: 98°/67° FUCK THIS SAT: 101°/70° FUCK THIS TOO SUN: 96°/69° FUCK THIS (NICE)

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DENVER’S FUCKING WEATHER @denversweather.bsky.social · 05/08/2026

DENVER, IN THIS, THE BUDDING ERA OF THE ULTRAHEAT, WE MUST TREASURE THE LITTLE THINGS. TODAY'S HIGH WILL BE IN THE 80s. YESTERDAY'S WAS TOO. HELL YEAH, NOT-OBSCENELY-HOT-TEMPERATURES!

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DENVER’S FUCKING WEATHER @denversweather.bsky.social · 03/08/2026

🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️ 🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️ 🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️ fuck this 🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️ 🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️ 🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️

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DENVER’S FUCKING WEATHER @denversweather.bsky.social · 03/08/2026

FUCK, THE TEMPERATURE SOMEHOW WENT UP A DEGREE FROM AN HOUR AGO. IT'S EARLY EVENING THE TEMPERATURE IS SUPPOSED TO GO DOWN. WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK IS FUCKING HAPPENING THIS IS NOT OKAY.

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DENVER’S FUCKING WEATHER @denversweather.bsky.social · 02/08/2026

DENVER I KNOW IT'S UNGODLY HOT OUT THERE BUT I JUST WANT YOU TO KNOW IT WILL ALSO BE UNGODLY HOT OUT THERE TOMORROW, THEN FRIDAY, AND PROBABLY THIS COMING SATURDAY AS WELL. [MIDDLE FINGERS IN THE AIR] FUCK IT ALL! SUN: 102°/71° MON: 101°/62° TUE: 80°/58° WED: 84°/61° THU: 93°/63° FRI: 98°/69°

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Reposted by DENVER’S FUCKING WEATHER

The Onion @theonion.com · 31/07/2026

Rockies Fan Opens Private Tab To Check Score

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DENVER’S FUCKING WEATHER @denversweather.bsky.social · 31/07/2026

DENVER THIS WEEKEND JUST GETS WORSE AND WORSE, WITH A REAL SCORCHER AND POSSIBLE RECORD-SETTING (WELL, RECORD-TYING) 103 DEGREE HIGH FORECAST FOR SUNDAY. F U SUNDAY GO DIE IN A FIRE. NO, WAIT, THAT'S US. FUCK. FRI: 91°/64° SAT: 95°/69° SUN: 103°/73°

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DENVER’S FUCKING WEATHER @denversweather.bsky.social · 27/07/2026

WHO'S READY FOR SOME... 🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️ 🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️ 🌧️ MOTHERFUCKING RAIN 🌧️ 🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️ 🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️

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DENVER’S FUCKING WEATHER @denversweather.bsky.social · 26/07/2026

DENVER THE UNRELENTING HEAT RELENTS A LITTLE... BUT NOT TODAY AND, WHEN IT DOES RELENT, NOT ENOUGH. [MIDDLE FINGERS OUT, SPINNING AROUND] FUCK EVERYTHING, FUCK IT ALL, FUCK IT REPEATEDLY SUN: 101°/74° MON: 94°/68° TUE: 92°/66° STORMS WED: 91°/67° STORMS THU: 94°/67° STORMS FRI: 96°/67°

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DENVER’S FUCKING WEATHER @denversweather.bsky.social · 24/07/2026

DENVER WE'VE GOT A WEEKEND FULL OF FUCKING BULLSHIT AND IT ONLY GETS BULLSHITTIER THE DEEPER WE GET. SATURDAY WE COULD SET A RECORD HIGH (FUCK THAT), AND THEN SUNDAY WE COULD TOO (FUCK OFF U WEATHER RECORDS WHAT DID WE EVER DO TO U????) SUCH CRAP: FRI: 97°/71° SAT: 100°/72° SUN: 100°/72°

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DENVER’S FUCKING WEATHER @denversweather.bsky.social · 22/07/2026

💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀 💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀 💀💀 96° AT 6 P.M. 💀💀 💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀 💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀

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DENVER’S FUCKING WEATHER @denversweather.bsky.social · 21/07/2026

💃💃💃💃💃💃💃💃💃💃💃 💃💃💃💃💃💃💃💃💃💃💃 💃💃💃 IT HOT 💃💃💃 💃💃💃💃💃💃💃💃💃💃💃 💃💃💃💃💃💃💃💃💃💃💃

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DENVER’S FUCKING WEATHER @denversweather.bsky.social · 19/07/2026

DENVER, IT BRINGS ME NO JOY TO TELL YOU THAT WE'VE GOT A SCORCHER TODAY FOLLOWED BY A 100° MOTHERFUCKER MONDAY. FUCK THIS, FUCK THAT, FUCK EVERYTHING. YOUR FUCKING WEATHER: SUN: 99°/70° MON: 100°/72° TUE: 92°/68° WED: 90°/67° STORMS THU: 84°/66° STORMS FRI: 91°/68° STORMS

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DENVER’S FUCKING WEATHER @denversweather.bsky.social · 17/07/2026

DENVER IT'S STILL TOO GODDAMNED HOT. FUCK! YR FUCKING WEEKEND: FRI: 94°/67° SAT: 95°/67° SUN: 98°/71°

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DENVER’S FUCKING WEATHER @denversweather.bsky.social · 13/07/2026

lol love this so hard what the fuck does it take to get one of these god damned amazing profile badges around here

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DENVER’S FUCKING WEATHER @denversweather.bsky.social · 12/07/2026

DENVER THIS IS SOME SCORCHY BULLSHIT WE'RE IN THE MIDDLE OF AND I DON'T LIKE IT VERY MUCH. YOUR FUCKING WEATHER: SUN: 97°/67° FUCK THIS MON: 98°/66° FUCK THAT TUE: 96°/65° FUCK THIS TOO WED: 95°/65° FUCKING FUCK RIGHT OFF THU: 96°/66° NOPE FRI: 95°/66° FUCK.

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DENVER’S FUCKING WEATHER @denversweather.bsky.social · 10/07/2026

DENVER IT'S HOT AND LORD ALMIGHTY IT'S GETTIN FUCKIN HOTTER. THE FAT CATS AT BOULDER'S NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE WITH THEIR "FREE AIR CONDITIONING" AND THEIR "ILLEGAL FRIENDSHIP WITH THE (EVIL) SUN" HAVE SOME ANSWERING TO DO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YOUR FUCKING WEEKEND: FRI: 91°/62° SAT: 97°/62° SUN: 97°/66°

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DENVER’S FUCKING WEATHER @denversweather.bsky.social · 05/07/2026

DENVER, IT'S HOTTER THAN I'D LIKE, BUT IT'S JULY SO [SHRUGGIE] JUST REMEMBER WHEN IT GETS TOO HOT FOR YOU THAT THIS IS NOT THE WAY IT'S SUPPOSED TO BE AND THE OIL COMPANIES HELPED THIS HELL ALONG. SUN: 96°/66° MON: 96°/67° TUE: 92°/65° WED: 92°/64° LIL STORMY GUYS THU: 89°/62° FRI: 91°/63°

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DENVER’S FUCKING WEATHER @denversweather.bsky.social · 03/07/2026

DENVER, YOU KNOW, I LOVE THIS FUCKING COUNTRY. I LOVE ITS NINETY DEGREE HIGHS, ITS LOWS IN THE TEENS (CC MATT GAETZ), AND EVERYTHING IN BETWEEN. I LOVE THREE DAY WEEKENDS, I LOVE FIREWORKS... I LOVE FIREWORK BANS. FUCK YEA USA NEVER STOP BEING U FRI: 92°/62° SAT: 89°/60° SUN: 92°/63°

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