Finally, a holiday framework built for neurodivergent minds. Let's be honest, with ADHD, traditional planners feel like a performance review we're already failing. When we miss a day, we feel awful, freak out and fall off the planning wagon. Still borne predominantly by women, “getting ready for Christmas” with its cumulative mental load, often catches us by surprise every year. Layer over living with ADHD, the hidden project management of December tracking gifts, navigating crowded shops, and masking exhaustion leads straight to a Christmas Day burnout. The Defiant Daughters Half-Ar$ed Christmas Journal contains no judgment, no rigid expectations, and absolutely zero shame. Built on real-world coping frameworks; as in - I’ve lived them, used them, coached them and trained these frameworks to multitudes of people. The journal acts as your temporary working memory so you can pace yourself and actually enjoy the festive season.

I want to share something that hit me in the solar plexus from Adam Richard's newsletter today - sign up at his sparkly page 🪩 This post is long simply because Adam writes so beautifully, I didn't want to edit it. You need to read his rage and pain in equal measure. But first an introduction as to why Adam's story is so important, and why it hit me hard: We are watching a swathe of misinformation about science, resources, humanity; it is no surprise there is a rise in 'othering'.

This has ended up longer than I originally intended. We are halfway through the year, and if all you did was scrape through with the skin off your knuckles, in my humble opinion, you've done fine. I worry about the whirl of content coming through about what people should have done by now at this time of the year. What have you managed / achieved / celebrated? What have you ticked off on your list for this year? Output, output, output. Mid-point reflections or New Year resolutions can be maddening when you live with ADHD.

This is a copy of an email I've sent to the The Telepathy Tapes podcast. I journalled it out yesterday as I felt so uncomfortable with the decision to have a discussion with Mayim Balik. Dear Ky, I found the Telepathy Tapes through Glennon Doyle, who recommended the podcast in a newsletter. I have volunteered a lot of my time providing respite care to families with teens on the autistic spectrum. Many of whom were non-speakers; many we knew who were in there, but didn’t have access to spelling, AAC technology including word boards, for anyone to do anything more than meet their basic needs.

Please note - I wrote this post last year If this year hasn't already been the gift that keeps on giving, I'm in the middle of yet another restructure. Which prompted me cobbling together this blog post from a couple of emails I've sent. For many neurodivergent staff, while change is being described as “fluid", “dynamic,” or seen as “a natural evolution”, it can feel more like quicksand. The lack of clear expectations, organisational structure, or consistent communication does not inspire innovation, far from it. The overriding emotion it triggers is exhaustion, "Here we go again".

One of the most common misconceptions about ADHD is that we’re lazy; that we can't be bothered; or when we switch off when things get hard, we'll get "Why don't you just try?" This perception, combined with the merest hint of inconsistency in our behaviour, is what is often noticed at work. We’re told we simply need to try harder, focus more, or to buy an organiser. (I do not need any help with my stationery fixation thank you). But what looks like laziness and/or doom-scrolling from the outside is often something very different on the inside: overwhelm and an autopilot response frantically chasing dopamine, trying to recalibrate a nervous system on the edge.

This is a sort-of-follow-up, either that or companion piece, to my post from earlier this week, Building A Life You Don't Want To Escape From. We were talking about our general weariness: That we’re so fried by the evening, we’re not actually engaging with anything. Instead we’re all doom-scrolling while watching streaming services, trying to calm our overstimulated nervous systems. That is another blog post, which will be here later this week. One of the reasons for this tiredness is that we often commute to work outside of our home.

For years, I lived my life burning candles at both ends. The patriachal, capitalist society norms of 'busy, busy, busy' is so ingrained in us that we're shamed when we slow and relax; or heaven forbid, sit down with nothing to do. Don’t believe me? What about the gadgets available to buy to simply keep your Teams status active and your icon green? What is that if not being shamed into action; perceived or otherwise. There are any number of things we do during the working day that mean we’re not always going to be touching a computer for 20 minutes.

ALT: a woman is making a funny face with her mouth open and her eyes closed .

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ALT: a man wearing a hat and sunglasses is standing in front of a map .