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Devon

@damitsdevon.bsky.social
370 followers 221 following 2.4K posts

She/her, Public health nerd, constantly in need of more coffee, absolutely obsessed with my cat

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Devon @damitsdevon.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
IT has got us so suspicious that when HR sent everyone an email saying we could get a free gift from our new “ergonomic collection,” a bunch of people reported the email as phishing and IT had to tell us we could stop reporting it since it was legit
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Devon @damitsdevon.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
I don’t need to go to my HS reunion to compare myself to my classmates, that’s what social media is for
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Devon @damitsdevon.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
If a registered dietitian says it’s okay to eat sweets, he might actually believe them. If I say it, he’ll think I’m making excuses for having bad habits 🙃
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Devon @damitsdevon.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
Reposting anti-diet culture instagram posts in hopes that they’ll slowly infiltrate my dad’s feed now that he has instagram
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Devon @damitsdevon.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
Hulu giving me a Botox commercial during an ad break while I watch a documentary about The Swan 🫠
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Devon @damitsdevon.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
The amount of times my college roommates and I would pull the, “I’m going to go pee, want to come with?” card to give each other an excuse to politely ditch some rando trying to grind with one of us at a party 🙃
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Devon @damitsdevon.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
Right?? Like, a good chunk of the time you don’t need to be a hero, you just need to pretend you know the person being harassed well enough that you would interrupt the person harassing them to say hi and start a conversation
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Devon @damitsdevon.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
The only doctor I would trust less than AI is the one at CityMD who saw me having trouble to breathe and just assumed I was out of shape, and oops I ended up in the hospital with endocarditis 5 days later
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Devon @damitsdevon.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
I feel like the host can’t even pretend to be neutral this season lmao
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Devon @damitsdevon.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
And then they have the nerve to be like, “oh I hope my girlfriend doesn’t move on to another guy, I hope I don’t lose her,” like she just watched a video of you saying you were going to shoot your shot with some woman you just met, maybe be more worried about that
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Devon @damitsdevon.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
I feel like on this next season of Temptation Island on Netflix, the men are not even trying to deny that they want to cheat on their girlfriends, all of whom are significantly hotter than them
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Devon @damitsdevon.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
This is my neighbor’s cat Junior! I’m fostering (and hopefully adopting) a cat named Phoenix who has been with me since Saturday night and is still a little shy, but warming up to me faster than she has with other people apparently
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Devon @damitsdevon.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
I’ve been holding him for at least 20 minutes, but I don’t want him to pounce on me
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Devon @damitsdevon.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
Does anyone happen to have advice on dealing with a cat with play aggression?? Mlem cat is mostly very sweet, but he won’t stop pouncing on me unless I’m holding him (and he get mad when I put him down)
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Devon @damitsdevon.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
I was literally just thinking this yesterday lol
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Devon @damitsdevon.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
Accidentally got a mlem photo of my neighbor’s cat
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Devon @damitsdevon.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
I hope the baby is doing well now, but why would you name your child that….
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Devon @damitsdevon.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
They got engaged after deciding to leave together! And I looked them up and they got married this summer, so congrats to the one couple that managed to make being on reality tv work for their relationship.
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Devon @damitsdevon.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
Dude who has cheated on every women he has dated after his girlfriend leaves Temptation Island without him- I can’t believe she couldn’t let go of her resentment, but at least I learned to forgive myself 🤡
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Devon @damitsdevon.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
lol, the final date of the girl whose boyfriend had a threesome is like, “I don’t even care if you pick me, just dump him for the love of god!”
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Devon @damitsdevon.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
Okay, the dude spending the final date with one of the “temptresses” by coming up with a plan to propose to his girlfriend gets a pass
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Devon @damitsdevon.bsky.social · 24/09/2026
Netflix truly seemed to find the most delusional men in the world to be on Temptation Island
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Devon @damitsdevon.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
Oh…..
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Devon @damitsdevon.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
Noooo I have Freak on a Leash by Korn stuck in my head because my friend sang it at karaoke to troll everyone last weekend😭😭😭
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Devon @damitsdevon.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
Worried that CVS is going to start thinking I’m casing the place because of how often I go to buy something, see that it’s now behind a locked plastic wall and then leave and buy it online instead
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Devon @damitsdevon.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
Still can’t get over how much of a catfish the cast recording for this year’s staging of Chess is 😭😭
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Devon @damitsdevon.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
They had an understudy, and the lead ran away the night before the show, but somehow the cast was all like, “oh, it’s perfectly logical that the understudy doesn’t know all the lead’s lines yet, let’s have the director fill in!”
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Devon @damitsdevon.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
In the Hallmark movie I’m watching, it’s apparently normal understudy for the lead role in a play to not be ready to take on the role on opening night, which does not seem right to me???
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Devon @damitsdevon.bsky.social · 19/09/2026
A few hours after I sang The Subway at karaoke, two of my friends and I witnessed this
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Devon @damitsdevon.bsky.social · 19/09/2026
Karaoke tonight and seeing rock bands tomorrow night and I keep forgetting to buy ear plugs, so R.I.P. my ears I guess 🙃
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Devon @damitsdevon.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
This administration even managed to fuck up soap 🫠 www.usatoday.com/story/money/...
usatoday.com
Hand soap recalled for infection risk. See affected products
The hand soap, usually used to keep bacteria at bay, could be doing the opposite, according to an FDA report.
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Devon @damitsdevon.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
I have a friend who’s going through a lot of roommate drama and keeps complaining about it and then apologizing for talking so much and I have to be like, no please keep me updated, I live for drama
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Devon @damitsdevon.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
Sometimes I think about how I have a mental block to eating at a Michelin recommended dumpling restaurant because I ate there when I had gallstones and threw up a few hours later, because of the gallstones
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Devon @damitsdevon.bsky.social · 15/09/2026
Guy on Temptation Island- now that I’ve had a threesome, I don’t have to hold it over my girlfriend’s head anymore Ummm, you should have never held it over her head in the first place????
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Devon @damitsdevon.bsky.social · 15/09/2026
Getting mad at the ads that are like “ask your doctor if you’re at risk for shingle,” like I know I am, I got it when I was 25. Unless you’ll let me get the vaccine in my 30s, fuck off
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Devon @damitsdevon.bsky.social · 13/09/2026
Lmao regular TV- Ghosts and Big Mistakes
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Devon @damitsdevon.bsky.social · 13/09/2026
I think an actress who was in two tv shows I watch is here
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Devon @damitsdevon.bsky.social · 13/09/2026
I love going to indie shows, but like, I got here over 30 minutes after the “start time” and didn’t miss anything lol
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Devon @damitsdevon.bsky.social · 12/09/2026
They just said we’re no different than German nazis lmao
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Devon @damitsdevon.bsky.social · 12/09/2026
A woman walking by with her kids starting yelling at them and then one of the kids took that as a cue to scream at the protesters lol
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Devon @damitsdevon.bsky.social · 12/09/2026
Clinic protester is saying we have bad vibes because the pigeons flew away from us, and he knows he’s right because he took a biology class 🤡
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Devon @damitsdevon.bsky.social · 12/09/2026
I was in 5th grade, but my school pretty much also did this. I had no idea anything unusual happened out in the world until near the end of the day when we got papers to take home to our parents alluding to a plane crash in New York
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Devon @damitsdevon.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
I have never been to his fancy ass restaurant, but I watched a bunch of Anthony Burdain’s shows
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Devon @damitsdevon.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
Finally watched Tony and I guess I was the only one in the theater who gasped at the Eric Ripert cameo at the end of the movie 🤓
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Devon @damitsdevon.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
I know most House Hunters episodes are filmed after the people have already bought/leased a house, but sometimes I wonder if they get buyers remorse when they film the episode and the realtor shows them other houses they could have lived in
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Devon @damitsdevon.bsky.social · 10/09/2026
Each movie is as long or longer than the stage version 🫠
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Devon @damitsdevon.bsky.social · 09/09/2026
Why is someone doing a photoshoot in the lobby of my apartment??? 🙃
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Devon @damitsdevon.bsky.social · 08/09/2026
Ooh, now one of the guys is going on a date with the influencer who pretended to be PA student at Duke. And he just called her genuine, lmao
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Devon @damitsdevon.bsky.social · 08/09/2026
“What, my girlfriend thinks that I, the guy who just had shower sex with a 22 year old I met three days ago, incapable of being a good, faithful boyfriend? How dare she not give me an ounce of grace! Guess I’ll just have to forgive myself and have more shower sex.”
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Devon @damitsdevon.bsky.social · 08/09/2026
Started watching Temptation Island, which was probably a bad idea, because the men on this show have the emotional intelligence of a brick
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