Akephallus @cryptotheism.bsky.social · 2hHey man I know my uncle can lay eggs like Yoshi and throw them to solve problems, but he's like, sensitive about it. You really shouldn't have brought it up. You should apologize. 09942
Akephallus @cryptotheism.bsky.social · 29/09/2026Friend: I guess fuck sloops, marry caravels, kill- Me: Oh real quick, I just someone swear an oath against you. Friend: White? Me: White male oath yes. 2428
Akephallus @cryptotheism.bsky.social · 28/09/2026Miquella would tell you not to get the surgery. And he would call you brave. 1645
Akephallus @cryptotheism.bsky.social · 28/09/2026Victorian Urchin: Oi Mx, I worked me little fingers to the bone but got two vapes and an iphone six Me: Well done chauncey, you get an extra hour of Angry Video Game Nerd this week. Victorian Urchin: (reaching for a hidden dagger) Only an hour? 07625
Akephallus @cryptotheism.bsky.social · 28/09/2026I can't help but feel that something was lost between Mortal Shell 1 and 2. The new game lacks the jank of its predecessor, but also much of its creative spark. The first game has so many interesting design choices that feel sidelined in favor of an inferior sekiro parry. 1230
Akephallus @cryptotheism.bsky.social · 27/09/2026I went to see a puppet show in the park and it was so hot I had a POTS flare up and nearly fainted. There was also a guy dressed like a Homestuck character in the audience. 0582
Reposted by Akephallus2008gayguy.bsky.social @2008gayguy.bsky.social · 18/10/2024lady gaga... just found out about her! 2612242
Akephallus @cryptotheism.bsky.social · 27/09/2026Ngl I think it's safe to call Adventures of Huck Finn underrated. This books reputation as required reading sandbags how fantastic it actually is. It should be discussed in the same weight class as Moby Dick. 2926
Akephallus @cryptotheism.bsky.social · 26/09/2026Should I put this thing in a big slingshot and shot it into space 912019
Akephallus @cryptotheism.bsky.social · 26/09/2026If I was sexually kicked into quicksand I would smirk bc I know it's not like cartoons. 110122
Akephallus @cryptotheism.bsky.social · 26/09/2026Hitting a cart? (Face darkens) Like the bandits that have been plaguing my trade routes? 110535
Akephallus @cryptotheism.bsky.social · 26/09/2026(Sloshes my wine goblet) Tell me more of this bad video game. 618269
Reposted by AkephallusAkephallus @cryptotheism.bsky.social · 18/09/2026WE ARE LIVE WITH THE SURGE www.twitch.tv/cryptotheism 0262
Akephallus @cryptotheism.bsky.social · 24/09/2026My recent move to Da Big City has made me 10x more social and thus 10x less intersted in Posting. I feel like I am able to put more of my energy into my actual important work. 3901
Akephallus @cryptotheism.bsky.social · 23/09/2026[guy in a labcoat showing rapidly me photos] Lives in a hell of their own creation. Hell of their own creation. Hell of their own creation. Well adjusted. Hell of their own creation. Well adjusted but is currently creating their own special hell. Hell of their own creation. 118558
Akephallus @cryptotheism.bsky.social · 23/09/2026Ready for a fun night out? Friend: Before the uber gets here, how is the blade of damocles hanging? Do I look doomed? Doomed as fuck! Girl it will fallllll. 110432
Reposted by AkephallusUSER WAS BLOCKED FOR THIS POST @blockedforthispost.bsky.social · 22/09/2026heyyyyyyyyy *snuggles up to you* 332086611
Akephallus @cryptotheism.bsky.social · 22/09/2026Mark Twain's rewrite of Hamlets soliloquy is one of the most charming things I've read in this year. It's a great microcosm of Twain's style. Lighthearted and playful over some seriously impressive literary flourishes. 0270
Akephallus @cryptotheism.bsky.social · 22/09/2026Corru./observer is almost too good to play on stream. This is a game I want to get absorbed in. 1310
Akephallus @cryptotheism.bsky.social · 22/09/2026www.twitch.tv/cryptotheism Playing Corru. observertwitch.tvcryptotheism - Live on TwitchCorru.Observer | Streaming the surge for 2 viewers. 040
Akephallus @cryptotheism.bsky.social · 22/09/2026(Looking over your shoulder while you look at art hyper ass growth art) Oh dear. I hope these young men find a curse for their condition. It- *takes a deep, emotional breath* -its good of you to care. 17826
Akephallus @cryptotheism.bsky.social · 22/09/2026I'm frankly a poser for haunted puppets. I'm not cool enough to be a haunted puppet. (Looks around to see if any women will take pity on me) Do any of you fine young ladies have 1.10¢ for bus fare? 37118
Reposted by Akephallusscorpy @socpens.com · 21/09/2026my papa Geppetto carved me out of this special piece of wooood 321245
Akephallus @cryptotheism.bsky.social · 21/09/2026Getting into Lolita fashion has got me learning about the Chinese domestic textile market and international shipping logistics. I'm buying shit through a third party warehouser so I can buy direct from taobao at a quarter the price. 3923
Akephallus @cryptotheism.bsky.social · 21/09/2026Hey man whats up- (narrows eyes) you're age regressing by about two days right now, aren't you? 4522126
Reposted by AkephallusSarah Z @sarahz.bsky.social · 21/09/2026Yeah I know a good number of these 534521966
Akephallus @cryptotheism.bsky.social · 18/09/2026Spent 11 hours laying this bad boy. Hope the pope enjoys it. 113236
Akephallus @cryptotheism.bsky.social · 18/09/2026WE ARE LIVE WITH THE SURGE www.twitch.tv/cryptotheism 0262
Reposted by AkephallusRachel Theresa⭐Cali Zughase @shamaness.bsky.social · 17/09/2026she got a gig working for that chinese coconut milk brand that keeps getting in trouble for writing that drinking it will make your boobs grow bigger in their ads 110630
Akephallus @cryptotheism.bsky.social · 17/09/2026I've been playing FF7 on emulator and I understand why every girl in 1997 was obsessed with Cloud. 11286
Akephallus @cryptotheism.bsky.social · 17/09/2026Tonight on twitch I will be playing my favorite mid soulslike; THE SURGE. 5pm Pacific. I am unbelievably excited to show off this bizarre little game and how it is secretly brilliant. 1151
Reposted by AkephallusTake Meowt by Franz Ferdinyan @wendysnowradish.bsky.social · 17/09/2026If I was the bouncer at The Turtle Club I would have ripped Dana Carveys head clean off his shoulders 07630
Reposted by AkephallusAkephallus @cryptotheism.bsky.social · 30/08/2026Watch my video. Join my patreon. 14710
Akephallus @cryptotheism.bsky.social · 16/09/2026Twitter has now removed my ability to look at asses of any gender unless I download their wretched little app and send some pasty little twerp my government id. 2892
Akephallus @cryptotheism.bsky.social · 15/09/2026And your phone has more of these funny images on it? (Swirls my wine glass) Well well well. How interesting. Proceed. 17711