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Cryptan

@cryptan.bsky.social
739 followers 487 following 2.9K posts

🤞☠️🤞

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Cryptan @cryptan.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
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Cryptan @cryptan.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
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Cryptan @cryptan.bsky.social · 11/08/2026
For comparison, @wsj.com, what did all those “alarmed” establishment Republicans do when they saw Twitler taking over their party? Oh, that’s right. They fell in line behind him.
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Cryptan @cryptan.bsky.social · 06/08/2026
Only one of these presidents is on Mount Rushmore, and that’s the guy who also wrote the Declaration of Independence. If someone could explain this to Don Don, he might leave Greenland alone.
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Cryptan @cryptan.bsky.social · 10/07/2026
This is who Unionists have always been. Racist, bigoted assholes.
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Cryptan @cryptan.bsky.social · 08/07/2026
Is it strange that stirrers come in individually wrapped packages, but lids don’t?
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Cryptan @cryptan.bsky.social · 02/07/2026
Suckers.
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Cryptan @cryptan.bsky.social · 01/07/2026
Admitting Texas into the Union was a mistake. Should have let them remain an independent, tin-hat dictatorship, as a warning to the rest of the states.
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Cryptan @cryptan.bsky.social · 28/06/2026
“But we’re pro-Israel, so it isn’t antisemitism.”
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Cryptan @cryptan.bsky.social · 23/06/2026
Suddenly Obama’s deal doesn’t look like such a disaster, huh, guys? 🖕
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Cryptan @cryptan.bsky.social · 01/06/2026
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Cryptan @cryptan.bsky.social · 19/05/2026
Dear Bill, Which of these countries receives military aid from the United States?
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Cryptan @cryptan.bsky.social · 16/05/2026
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Cryptan @cryptan.bsky.social · 15/05/2026
I had this years ago during a deployment to Okinawa. Never again. 🤣
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Cryptan @cryptan.bsky.social · 11/05/2026
Found on FB. Huh.
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Cryptan @cryptan.bsky.social · 09/05/2026
A boycott of SEC football could save democracy.
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Cryptan @cryptan.bsky.social · 09/05/2026
We get all kinds in New York.
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Cryptan @cryptan.bsky.social · 06/05/2026
My priest friend chose to leave the ballot blank on the presidential line.
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Cryptan @cryptan.bsky.social · 01/05/2026
Prescient, as always.
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Cryptan @cryptan.bsky.social · 29/04/2026
OMG IT’S TRUE!! They DID pave paradise and put up a parking lot!! IN BROOKLYN!!!
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Cryptan @cryptan.bsky.social · 15/04/2026
Writers at The Hill must have missed his latest approval numbers. And the drop in violent crime over the first three months of the year. Go figure.
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Cryptan @cryptan.bsky.social · 13/04/2026
Here he is in scrubs.
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Cryptan @cryptan.bsky.social · 13/04/2026
Yup
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Cryptan @cryptan.bsky.social · 13/04/2026
Swear to god, this doesn’t make sense to me. Based on what?? The idiot’s claim that they called begging for a deal? I would really think the market would have caught on by now.
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Cryptan @cryptan.bsky.social · 13/04/2026
We told them that he was the Antichrist.
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Cryptan @cryptan.bsky.social · 01/04/2026
The Guardian does headlines right.
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Cryptan @cryptan.bsky.social · 28/03/2026
#NoKings
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Cryptan @cryptan.bsky.social · 24/03/2026
Oh what no way
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Cryptan @cryptan.bsky.social · 23/03/2026
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Cryptan @cryptan.bsky.social · 17/03/2026
Dumbass can’t understand.
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Cryptan @cryptan.bsky.social · 17/03/2026
I know the original article was satire, but I truthfully don’t know if Newton’s post is.
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Cryptan @cryptan.bsky.social · 15/03/2026
Credit to @victoriasapphire.bsky.social for sharing this with me. Is this what “winning” looks like?
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Cryptan @cryptan.bsky.social · 14/03/2026
This couch commando had twenty years of war to put on a uniform, but now he’s ready to fight. Fuck you, Mullin.
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Cryptan @cryptan.bsky.social · 13/03/2026
The stupidity… it burns.
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Cryptan @cryptan.bsky.social · 12/03/2026
Seriously, so what? He has mined the straits and put our economy in a tailspin, but the Journal thinks he looks weak because he’s not giving interviews? Twitler is telling Americans that high oil prices are a good thing, but the ayatollah looks weak??
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Cryptan @cryptan.bsky.social · 28/02/2026
RFK Jr.'s "health" crusade makes more sense when compared to the words of a Spanish Nationalist captain during the civil war:
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Cryptan @cryptan.bsky.social · 28/02/2026
I wrote this poem during the last war. Felt timely this morning.
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Cryptan @cryptan.bsky.social · 16/02/2026
Huh.
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Cryptan @cryptan.bsky.social · 15/02/2026
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Cryptan @cryptan.bsky.social · 14/02/2026
What the fuck, @vanityfair.com?
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Cryptan @cryptan.bsky.social · 14/02/2026
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Cryptan @cryptan.bsky.social · 13/02/2026
As it should.
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Cryptan @cryptan.bsky.social · 01/02/2026
Oh. What a surprise.
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Cryptan @cryptan.bsky.social · 26/01/2026
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Cryptan @cryptan.bsky.social · 26/01/2026
Unsurprising.
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Cryptan @cryptan.bsky.social · 20/01/2026
A Carhartt sweatshirt and a Sox cap. They’re giving “federal law enforcement officers” a lot more leeway in their attire these days.
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Cryptan @cryptan.bsky.social · 20/01/2026
Every Republican owns this shit.
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Cryptan @cryptan.bsky.social · 09/01/2026
So much winning.
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Cryptan @cryptan.bsky.social · 07/01/2026
I feel like wearing this on my jacket is now a political statement.
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Cryptan @cryptan.bsky.social · 06/01/2026
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