Captain Yesterday @cptyesterday.bsky.social · 01/10/2026In the most fitting sponsorship arrangement of all time, the Red Sox broadcast is being brought to us by North Shore Adult Diapers. Not even kidding. 000
Captain Yesterday @cptyesterday.bsky.social · 27/09/2026Is there anyone familiar with the lefty conspiracist universe that could shoot me a dm? Trying to figure out, on my aging mother’s behalf, if someone is a harmless, lonely, old goofus who can be safely ignored (probable) or… whatever’s in column B (improbable but concerning). 000
Captain Yesterday @cptyesterday.bsky.social · 20/09/2026Why can’t they release the paperback the same day as the hardcover and just charge the same price initially? I want to support authors I like and read their books upon release, I just want to do it in the format that’s easier to carry around. 001
Captain Yesterday @cptyesterday.bsky.social · 10/09/2026Today we commemorate the most a real life death has ever resembled how it would have appeared on South Park. 000
Captain Yesterday @cptyesterday.bsky.social · 26/08/2026We like to joke around about ‘who green-lit this crap?’ but L&O: SVU has been printing money for 27 years and if I heard that pitch I’d have told Dick Wolf to get the fuck out of my office and maybe called the cops. 010
Captain Yesterday @cptyesterday.bsky.social · 24/08/2026The first time I flew to Vegas it was a moonless night and I woke up 25 minutes before landing convinced we were out over the ocean for some reason. 000
Captain Yesterday @cptyesterday.bsky.social · 21/08/2026@kentremendous.bsky.social @joeposnanski.com The thing about Walter offering to sell the media rights immediately brought to mind Mulaney’s bit about buying and immediately selling the Rolex. And that was one he was willing to tell us. 000
Captain Yesterday @cptyesterday.bsky.social · 14/08/2026@mranthropology.bsky.social Was that you on the Vergecast today? I think that makes you a thing this week. 100
Captain Yesterday @cptyesterday.bsky.social · 12/08/2026@alexspeier.bsky.social I have no idea how to research this—what’s the earliest in a month that a team’s loss total has exceeded that of the previous month? 000
Captain Yesterday @cptyesterday.bsky.social · 07/08/2026Pretty rich reading about this on a webpage that had to reload itself three times because it’s so loaded down with bullshit. 020
Captain Yesterday @cptyesterday.bsky.social · 05/08/2026Weather modeling has drastically improved, so your flight is much less likely to experience turbulence, so you’re much less likely to boot all over the plane. There used to be so much plane puke. 010
Captain Yesterday @cptyesterday.bsky.social · 03/08/2026I’m begging of you please don’t take my manifold. 010
Captain Yesterday @cptyesterday.bsky.social · 02/08/2026If I was making a video denying the horrific abuse allegations against me, I would simply not dress like a mid-tier Russian gangster. 000
Captain Yesterday @cptyesterday.bsky.social · 02/08/2026Dean Wormer. The guys in Outbreak who wanted to bomb the town. 010
Captain Yesterday @cptyesterday.bsky.social · 30/07/2026The governors will simply call up the payroll department at every business and direct them to send all federal withholdings to the state. And the payroll folks, always sort of curious about what the inside of a prison is like, will readily comply. We’re all mad, but being stupid doesn’t help. 000
Captain Yesterday @cptyesterday.bsky.social · 14/07/2026The home run derby is brought to you by a Ben Affleck character saying “ass plunder.” 000
Captain Yesterday @cptyesterday.bsky.social · 12/07/2026Mitch McConnell is healthy as a horse and will be discharged from the hospital any month now. 010
Captain Yesterday @cptyesterday.bsky.social · 08/07/2026In light of Kentucky law as I understand it and senate composition, liminal state Mitch McConnell is actually like a 90th percentile outcome. 000
Captain Yesterday @cptyesterday.bsky.social · 02/07/2026Jaylen Brown seems like a good dude, but also like the NBA player most likely to decide he wants to learn about the federal reserve and emerge from a Tik Tok rabbit hole three days later taking about Rothschilds. 000
Captain Yesterday @cptyesterday.bsky.social · 27/06/2026Stringer Bell was awfully young to need readers. 000
Captain Yesterday @cptyesterday.bsky.social · 22/06/2026TIL that Alan Greenspan was alive as recently as yesterday. 000
Captain Yesterday @cptyesterday.bsky.social · 15/06/2026When I was a kid I thought goalies were bullshit because I got it in my head that the purpose of soccer was to engender sympathy for people without arms. 010
Captain Yesterday @cptyesterday.bsky.social · 14/06/2026Scott Foster is like if Angel Hernandez also had a gambling scandal. 000
Captain Yesterday @cptyesterday.bsky.social · 24/05/2026I’m sorry, is this a well executed gag, or are there are actually robust capital markets within Minecraft? 000
Captain Yesterday @cptyesterday.bsky.social · 14/05/2026Looking through old pics and huge shoutout to whoever did the categorizing in the Phnom Penh airport bookstore. 010
Captain Yesterday @cptyesterday.bsky.social · 05/05/2026Wemby’s legs freak me out. Feels like the most gruesome injury we’ve ever seen just waiting to happen. 010
Captain Yesterday @cptyesterday.bsky.social · 26/04/2026Now to open up Bluesky and see some posts about the Red Sox manager situation… 010
Captain Yesterday @cptyesterday.bsky.social · 22/04/2026Is Derrick White better at basketball than Dyson Daniels? 000
Captain Yesterday @cptyesterday.bsky.social · 21/04/2026CJ McCollum isn’t going to fall for a banana in the tailpipe. 000
Captain Yesterday @cptyesterday.bsky.social · 18/04/2026“This is All Things Considered, I’m David Green. Kawhi Leonard remains on assignment…” 010
Captain Yesterday @cptyesterday.bsky.social · 10/04/2026There’s an irony in reading about this on a website so crammed full of shit that my phone had to reload it twice before I got to the end. 010
Captain Yesterday @cptyesterday.bsky.social · 27/03/2026If they do this they’ll either be best friends for life or never speak again. 020
Captain Yesterday @cptyesterday.bsky.social · 24/03/2026Jamba Juice Jr. VP for Marketing: And the show is called ‘DTF: St. Louis’? HBO: Don’t worry, it’s not what it sounds like. … HBO: It’s so much fucking weirder than that. 020
Captain Yesterday @cptyesterday.bsky.social · 22/03/2026Nobody ever pulled a ladder up behind them faster and harder than Mohamad Atta returning his rental car 35 minutes before scheduled departure. 000
Captain Yesterday @cptyesterday.bsky.social · 11/03/2026The only way I could respect this is if Bam said now he was going after Wilt’s other scoring record. 000
Captain Yesterday @cptyesterday.bsky.social · 05/03/2026Spent most of his time at the horse track and the return address on the Christmas cards turned out to be a store that sold stoves, so… crimes? 000
Captain Yesterday @cptyesterday.bsky.social · 03/03/2026@kentremendous.bsky.social Star quarterback Joe Montana is obviously the quintessential hack screenwriter name that’s actually real. 000
Captain Yesterday @cptyesterday.bsky.social · 01/03/2026Seems not great that these companies have thought this stuff out less than the mods of the celebrity death pool thread on the baseball message board I frequent. 000
Captain Yesterday @cptyesterday.bsky.social · 24/02/2026@michaelhobbes.bsky.social I really like your work, but I’ve gotta think you wouldn’t stand for anyone using this data to reach this conclusion in most contexts. Especially with three of the fatalities in a single event. 000
Captain Yesterday @cptyesterday.bsky.social · 20/02/2026“Are you still a believer in Santa? Because at 7 it’s marginal, right?” remains one of the funniest things I’ve ever heard. 061
Captain Yesterday @cptyesterday.bsky.social · 08/02/2026Why is RFK Jr doing color commentary on this Celtics/Knicks game? 000
Captain Yesterday @cptyesterday.bsky.social · 25/01/2026McDaniels’ commitment to the visor is impressive. 000
Captain Yesterday @cptyesterday.bsky.social · 24/01/2026The best thing the NFL could do for the public perception of its officiating is buying NBA League Pass for everybody. 000
Captain Yesterday @cptyesterday.bsky.social · 04/01/2026I can’t believe they let Brook Lopez back in the league after he killed Richard Kimball’s wife. 000
Captain Yesterday @cptyesterday.bsky.social · 27/12/2025This is actually lousy design. Totally unclear if the arrow is indicating what side your tank is on, or which side of the pump to pull up to. 000
Captain Yesterday @cptyesterday.bsky.social · 25/12/2025@edzitron.com Being a Santa has annualized revenue of $120k per year! Am I doing this right? 000
