Chelsea Sky Free Blue @chelsonik.bsky.social · 1hTHEY ARE PUTTING ME IN THE CARGO HOLD OF THEIR MILLENNIAL FALCON AND TAKING ME AWAY TO SOMEWHERE SAFE 100
Chelsea Sky Free Blue @chelsonik.bsky.social · 5hBruh might not like him now, but he didn’t stop him. 000
Chelsea Sky Free Blue @chelsonik.bsky.social · 01/10/2026I’m the phone that hasn’t stopped ringing 000
Chelsea Sky Free Blue @chelsonik.bsky.social · 30/09/2026Processed food should cost most money than fresh food. Because of the processing. 100
Chelsea Sky Free Blue @chelsonik.bsky.social · 30/09/2026If you play a finger involved instrument, I want to see how fast you type. 100
Chelsea Sky Free Blue @chelsonik.bsky.social · 29/09/2026So we know Bryce is at least 12% good. Nope, Bryce AGAST is green too! 000
Chelsea Sky Free Blue @chelsonik.bsky.social · 29/09/2026The breakroom toilets are clogged this is going to be a disaster shift 000
Chelsea Sky Free Blue @chelsonik.bsky.social · 29/09/2026I’d like to walk a half marathon one day 000
Chelsea Sky Free Blue @chelsonik.bsky.social · 29/09/2026Yah Jeff Lawson definitely wanted to be President. 101
Chelsea Sky Free Blue @chelsonik.bsky.social · 29/09/2026Our schedule is determined by an algorithm. He has the ability to schedule me a midnight shift followed by a 5am shift 100
Chelsea Sky Free Blue @chelsonik.bsky.social · 29/09/2026And then every morning Lauren Sanchez is like “where is my army?” 000
Chelsea Sky Free Blue @chelsonik.bsky.social · 28/09/2026I’m pretty sure Jeff wants to be President 000
Chelsea Sky Free Blue @chelsonik.bsky.social · 28/09/2026Don’t do this. This is stupid. Now I need to watch your card instead of doing my job. 000
Chelsea Sky Free Blue @chelsonik.bsky.social · 27/09/2026JEFF! JEFF! I WHAT’S YOUR READ ON POTASH? YOU GOT A POTASH GUY? 000
Chelsea Sky Free Blue @chelsonik.bsky.social · 27/09/2026I zone out to this shit for hours a day, you will not beat me 000
Chelsea Sky Free Blue @chelsonik.bsky.social · 26/09/2026There are thousands of memers and comedians prostituting themselves so they can afford to tell jokes and Ben Collins is paying Alex Jones $81,000 a month instead of hiring. You couldn’t name it something else, champ? 000
Chelsea Sky Free Blue @chelsonik.bsky.social · 26/09/2026I need to eat a whole pizza tonight because my fridge is still broke 100
Chelsea Sky Free Blue @chelsonik.bsky.social · 26/09/2026Will I apologize for Patagonia? Will I apologize for the free market? Absolutely not. This is business not Tim Called In Happy Fun Time Shit Show. 000
Chelsea Sky Free Blue @chelsonik.bsky.social · 25/09/2026I apologize for calling Jim Spanfeller “Daddy” in the G/O Media company slack a few dozen times. I was kidding. 000
Chelsea Sky Free Blue @chelsonik.bsky.social · 25/09/2026And the fifth character was the state of media itself 000
Chelsea Sky Free Blue @chelsonik.bsky.social · 25/09/2026@satiricalbeing.bsky.social onto serious issues. It’s a shame The Onion Futures Act is already taken… en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Onion_F...en.wikipedia.orgOnion Futures Act - Wikipedia 000
Chelsea Sky Free Blue @chelsonik.bsky.social · 25/09/2026We actually call our lead investors Bird Investors instead of Angel Investors because they work with us on the ground (then give us the freedom to soar alongside them) 000
Chelsea Sky Free Blue @chelsonik.bsky.social · 25/09/2026“Why wouldn’t you ask what The Onion would do?” — Jim smuggly saying something (probably about AI) 000
Chelsea Sky Free Blue @chelsonik.bsky.social · 25/09/2026“Flat Earth” was originally a slang code for talking about “the underbelly” of something in forums. Then unintended groups picked it up with the other discourse and it became its own conspiracy theory. 000
Chelsea Sky Free Blue @chelsonik.bsky.social · 24/09/2026@cardsagainsthumanity.com if Cowman wants to investigate factory supply chains he can buy me these toe-related sandals. Or this umbrella would have had a full artisan backed ethical e-comm ecosystem he could have helped structure. 100
Chelsea Sky Free Blue @chelsonik.bsky.social · 23/09/2026No THEY are Global Tetrahedron, this is the Tetraeder Estate 000
Chelsea Sky Free Blue @chelsonik.bsky.social · 23/09/2026Tell Jeff I want the Perpetual Challenger. 000
Chelsea Sky Free Blue @chelsonik.bsky.social · 22/09/2026Who can do characters better me or Ben Collins? Online or in person? 000
Chelsea Sky Free Blue @chelsonik.bsky.social · 21/09/2026So now instead of a human plaintiff you make the plaintiff an animal. Would you hold a walrus accountable for these crimes? 000
Chelsea Sky Free Blue @chelsonik.bsky.social · 20/09/2026Where are the people who’ve been to the fois gras region of France? The Dordogne Valley crowd needs to start driving. 000
Chelsea Sky Free Blue @chelsonik.bsky.social · 20/09/2026Bryce is trend casting again: microgreens 000
Chelsea Sky Free Blue @chelsonik.bsky.social · 20/09/2026I don’t know if I reach Chris but can I put one in the pitch box? A toggle between ClickHole and a lowercase clickhole (no H on the whole website) 000
Chelsea Sky Free Blue @chelsonik.bsky.social · 20/09/2026Programmer note: this profile is wearing the dock right now 000
Chelsea Sky Free Blue @chelsonik.bsky.social · 20/09/2026Jeff — having lost too much money to be successful can then leverage his business plan and sell the company in debt 001
Chelsea Sky Free Blue @chelsonik.bsky.social · 18/09/2026That would have been awesome though I swear to god 000
Chelsea Sky Free Blue @chelsonik.bsky.social · 17/09/2026Give me only the people who have been on private planes so I can move the needle on this. What the fuck is happening on Bluesky? 000
Chelsea Sky Free Blue @chelsonik.bsky.social · 17/09/2026You know how sometimes in history a medium is seen as “uncool” and artists subvert it and make it cool — do you think that will ever happen with AI slop if the energy crisis is solved and we launch Jeff Lawson far into space? 000