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cgjvdp

@cgjvdp.com
110 followers 314 following 310 posts

Lover of illegible usernames. Provider of spaces. A completely normal dumbass. I build tools to help cool people with more charisma than me produce content on the internet. uxp, foobar_industries, sul.f4t3, among others. From and in Utah.

PostsRepliesMedia
cgjvdp @cgjvdp.com · 24/10/2026
I’m from Utah. I love hiking around the San Rafael swells and not being able to identify a single footprint in the wind washed sand as you pass. There’s something about visiting a rarely touched area, and knowing you’ll leave it as undisturbed as possible for the next visitor. As opposed to this:
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cgjvdp @cgjvdp.com · 30/09/2026
You lost?
"Hopeful News followed you"
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cgjvdp @cgjvdp.com · 22/08/2026
INTERVIEW OF [REDACTED]
BY LCDR [REDACTED]:
Q: So how did you get yourself started in submersible operations?
A: Well, I'm sure you're familiar with my film Titanic.
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cgjvdp @cgjvdp.com · 10/08/2026
Always a good reminder while some people are muted. Never have I ever seen a more literal use case for That One Panel.
Discord conversation:

User 1: 
i see this all the time when i make the mistake of reading [City] facebook community groups
they're always bitching about how poor they are, how they can't afford anything. but they are super against taxes. like, they just don't understand how governments or economies work.

User 2:
It's really fun. Tons of people on disability and social security telling everyone how much they hate socialism

2 ignored messages -- hide

User 3:
Which is a lot like people complaining about capitalism owning stocks
"I hate it, but it's what we have so""That One Panel". Description taken from thatonemattborscomic.com

'A smirking guy, Mr. Gotcha, is improbably perched in a well, while a peasant of centuries-old appearance carrying a bundle of sticks says, “We should improve society somewhat.” Mr. Gotcha replies, “Yet you participate in society. Curious. I am very intelligent.”'
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cgjvdp @cgjvdp.com · 28/07/2026
This is me reading the headlines each morning.
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cgjvdp @cgjvdp.com · 16/07/2026
Found this screenshot being shared on another site making fun of Bluesky, and yeah. they're right. this place is the most uselessly pedantic at times.
A user posting "I am not a climate scientist but when I was a kid the number of times we couldn't go outside because of Canadian wildfire smoke was zero times."

Another bluesky user replying: "One small (pedantic) request: Please don't call it 'Canadian wildfire smoke'. It is smoke from wildfires ravaging Canada."
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cgjvdp @cgjvdp.com · 12/07/2026
For obvious reasons at the time I made the hottest room in the house my office when we moved in a decade ago. I'm now regretting this decision after a pandemic and moving to a fully remote company.
Screenshot of iOS weather app for Salt Lake City, UT with a current temperature of 106°F as of 2:25 Mountain Time
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cgjvdp @cgjvdp.com · 10/07/2026
Odd coincidence.
Screenshot of Jesse's post next to this one from Arizona Right Watch: https://bsky.app/profile/azrww.bsky.social/post/3mqcwg73bds2b

"Across the street from the “fuck ICE” coffee shop I’m at is Angel Studios, which is the key partner for Turning Point USA’s Chapter Leadership Summit in DC this weekend which some of the TPUSA folks here at the courthouse will also be present for because these folks fucking love their conferences."
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cgjvdp @cgjvdp.com · 07/07/2026
listen to @bloodwork.show
Gargoyles - Deadly Force
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cgjvdp @cgjvdp.com · 21/06/2026
Fuck. Can we not.
This map, centered in northern utah: https://data.usatoday.com/fires/

Showing a very large number of fires and smoke plumes stretching from the Iron Fire near Eureka, UT to Craig, CO and beyond.
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cgjvdp @cgjvdp.com · 15/06/2026
I’ve got friends in a discord arguing about how wrestling is trash, yet that same discord has 6 active TTRPG campaigns, two of which require dedicated in-character channels with campaign bylaws.
Spider-Man pointing meme
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cgjvdp @cgjvdp.com · 15/06/2026
Screenshot of a tweet from UFConParamount, the official partnership of the broadcast and event showing construction pictures. While the pictures can preferentially be called tacky and embarrassing, they objectively are cleaner. Quit Fucking Lying.
Screenshot of a tweet from UFConParamount, the official partnership of the broadcast and event showing construction pictures. While the pictures can preferentially be called tacky and embarassing, they objectively have less "white trash" aesthetic that the other AI images are trying to describe
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cgjvdp @cgjvdp.com · 12/06/2026
A bluesky moderation "report" page listing many reasons for submitting a post for moderation services, including standard reasons such as "misleading post", "spam", "unwanted sexual content". A fake "Offensive" option has been added with the subheading "This post is attacking me personally".
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cgjvdp @cgjvdp.com · 08/06/2026
Ahahaha. This spam is kinda clever. Social Security Statement as an MSI installer.
Dear Valued Customer,
We are reaching out to inform you that your updated Social Security Statement is now available for secure download.
As part of our commitment to improving the privacy and accessibility of your records, your statement is being delivered in a secure MSI file format.
Please follow the steps below to access your file:
• Click the button below to securely download the MSI installer.
• Once downloaded, double-click the file to launch the installation process.
• Follow the on-screen instructions to complete the installation.
The MSI format helps protect the integrity of your information during transmission and ensures your statement remains tamper-proof.
Download My Statement
Note: In some cases, the file may be password-protected as part of enhanced privacy testing. If you experience any issues accessing the file, please contact our support team.
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cgjvdp @cgjvdp.com · 03/06/2026
Lots of "I" statements. Bilton is replaceable and likely to not make it a decade in this role. Pelley has been a correspondent and anchor since most middle aged Americans were in school learning about the Gulf War,. Look forward to whatever Pelley does, and the downfall of this dumbass.
Screengrab from a January 30, 1991 CBS News segment with Scott Pelley reporting live from Saudi Arabia about the then ongoing Gulf War
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cgjvdp @cgjvdp.com · 02/06/2026
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cgjvdp @cgjvdp.com · 02/05/2026
I want to support using GitLab, but my god is their UI absolutely terrible. You can't create a TF statefile here. Just completely useless info. Like a fucking package of potatoes warning about the danger of undercooked shellfish, WHY ARE YOU TELLING ME THIS HERE?!?
"Support for periods(`.`) in Terraform state names might break existing states." as an informational message on the mail UI page of a repo.
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cgjvdp @cgjvdp.com · 29/04/2026
Guess I gotta repost this.
The Spice Girls holding sighs, which have been altered to say 
"If You", "Wanna Steal", "My Data", "You gotta", "Be a U.S. Based Corporation"
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cgjvdp @cgjvdp.com · 22/04/2026
This is literally unbelievable
Bluesky's background color in image form. It shows up when images don't load. This is a joke. I'm explaining the joke.
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cgjvdp @cgjvdp.com · 14/04/2026
Picture of Jesus Christ with the caption "Why are you praying to me? I'm just a doctor..."
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cgjvdp @cgjvdp.com · 14/04/2026
North American Fiber-Seeking Backhoe

Known for its inexhaustible appetite for buried fiber optic cables, this invasive species has multiplied across North America in recent years. A relative, the European Fiber Seeking Backhoe has also emerged across the Atlantic, although it has evolved to be smaller than the North American variety due to smaller European roadways. Scientists are still seeking a means to reduce the multiplication of this species; since current regulatory methods are proving ineffective, limited hunting permits are being proposed.
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cgjvdp @cgjvdp.com · 12/04/2026
Really need to clean up my random folder.
“The only big songs I want on my feed are the sound of Sunday’s church bells”
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cgjvdp @cgjvdp.com · 11/04/2026
The spam I get on my selfhosted mail server is way less horny than GMail’s sponsored ads.
Gmail sponsored ad: myspecialdates dot com

Your perfect match is waiting for you Get acquainted on our site. 100% verified
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cgjvdp @cgjvdp.com · 06/04/2026
I know it's hip to hate on the specifics of rounded corners from a certain company, but this window just popped up and I genuinely had a visceral reaction to all of it.
A modal window in iCloud for Windows. The title is "Enjoying iCloud for Windows?" with the text "Leave a review and share your experience with others". There are two buttons in the footer, "Leave a Review" and "Not Now". The former having a radius on the corners and is a shade of pink with violet hues. The "Not Now" button is fully rectangular. The entire window has what appears to be rounded/radius-ed corners in accordance with the base operating system.
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cgjvdp @cgjvdp.com · 05/04/2026
Best Star Trek crew. Wrong answers only.
The crew from This Old House.
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cgjvdp @cgjvdp.com · 04/04/2026
"You don't need more than 8 GB if you just browse the web or check email" Firefox: "Hold my beer"
Windows Task Manager showing Firefox consuming just under 16GB of ram.
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cgjvdp @cgjvdp.com · 02/04/2026
Finally some good news.
Screenshot of a Mr Show episode. “America can, should, must and will blow up the moon” is captioned.
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cgjvdp @cgjvdp.com · 27/03/2026
Who the hell wants to Chat with PDF.
A button on a website that just reads “Chat with PDF”
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cgjvdp @cgjvdp.com · 25/03/2026
They're killin ma boy
Sora, from Kingdom Hearts. Not the AI slop generator.
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cgjvdp @cgjvdp.com · 23/03/2026
Nobody fucking knew. Complete surprise.

Associated Press | By JON GAMBRELL
Published January 11, 2026 at 8:03am EDT


DUBAI, United Arab Emirates (AP) — Iran’s parliament speaker warned Sunday that the U.S. military and Israel would be “legitimate targets” if America strikes the Islamic Republic over the ongoing protests roiling the country, as threatened by President Donald Trump.
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cgjvdp @cgjvdp.com · 22/03/2026
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cgjvdp @cgjvdp.com · 14/03/2026
Had this come up a couple years back. The root AWS account for a very large healthcare company, which was a bit alarming for the 30 seconds it existed.
An Authenticator 2fa code labeled "Amazon Web Services - root-account-mfa-device-[redacted]" with the code 00-00-00
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cgjvdp @cgjvdp.com · 26/02/2026
Sean O'Brian can get fucked.
Sean O'Brian, the General President of the International Brotherhood of Teamsters, with a bunch of "fell for it again" awards pinned to his suit jacket
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cgjvdp @cgjvdp.com · 25/02/2026
If you did something, maybe I’d do something. Alas.
Spam texts from the DNC and other fund raisers, all from today.
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cgjvdp @cgjvdp.com · 23/02/2026
Can’t wait to have another marginally competitive national team to be disappointed in every year.
Illustration of a rodent standing on an electrical grate during an experiment where they are rewarded with a food pellet when they press a lever, and are also electrocuted. The rodent continues to harm themselves for temporary rewards.
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cgjvdp @cgjvdp.com · 09/02/2026
You know, if she came out and said her entire life was a bit, like a poor-man's Colbert or something, I'd almost forgive her. It's absolutely impressive she manages to thread the needle of "observes the world" and "misreads the entirely of it"
Laura Loomer tweet: "It's kind of ironic how Bad Bunny was dancing on an electrical post at the Super Bowl halftime show. Puerto Rico isn't exactly known for having reliable electricity. He could have highlighted the electrical grid crisis in PR and done some good with his platform, but he chose degeneracy!"Garth Marenghi's Darkplace screenshot with the line "I know writers who use subtext, and they're all cowards"
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cgjvdp @cgjvdp.com · 05/02/2026
I guess that explains this image
A screenshot of the SNL character "Pat", a gender-ambiguous character portrayed by Julia Sweeny. A halftone circle transparent background has been applied over their face as a joke.
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cgjvdp @cgjvdp.com · 31/01/2026
This timeline is cursed
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cgjvdp @cgjvdp.com · 26/01/2026
This is what they’ve been doing since I was a child.
The infamous Elian Gonzalez photograph of an armed Border Patrol BOTAC officer n April 22, 2000. (cropped slightly so Elian and Donato Dalrymple aren’t in frame). By Alan Diaz of the AP
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