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Califmom

@califmom.bsky.social
614 followers 358 following 372 posts

She/her Regularly cuts own bangs

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Califmom @califmom.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
My god, do I adore Gen Z recruiters. They text instead of email and the emojis are an added delight.
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Califmom @califmom.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
This exact scene.
static.klipy.com
Augustus Gloop (Michael Bollner) Stuck in Pipe
Alt: Augustus Gloop (Michael Bollner) Stuck in Pipe
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Califmom @califmom.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
“Children were salted until they were baptized.” Yeah, this is gonna be a solid read.
Audiook cover: Salt: A World History by Mark Kurlansky, Read by Scott Brick. Reddish orange cover with a linocut image of a salt shaker at the center of the cover.
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Reposted by Califmom
Rebecca Solnit @rebeccasolnit.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
Men Explain Rape to Me.
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Califmom @califmom.bsky.social · 30/09/2026
There is something innately fucked up about needing a mountain of pharmaceuticals in order to participate in capitalism. I do not like it here.
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Califmom @califmom.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
My 20s were built on 59¢ bean burritos. My teen years were spent raiding the spare change in the center console to buy gas.
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Califmom @califmom.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
It’s the hot tub RV reptile show at the fairgrounds. One stop shopping.
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Califmom @califmom.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
Splurged on some flood insurance last night.
static.klipy.com
Danny Devito: Dolla Dolla Bills, Y'all
Alt: Danny Devito: Dolla Dolla Bills, Y'all
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Califmom @califmom.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
This is how I’m processing life. Nail art.
Alligator nail art - green gator skin with an iridescent eye.
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Califmom @califmom.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
Me: Claps for you when you show up to the interview with your iced coffee.
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Califmom @califmom.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
At this rate, we can’t afford the gas for that van down by the river.
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Califmom @califmom.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
I would like one week of this year that doesn’t come with an enormous unexpected bill.
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Califmom @califmom.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
My professor: “A motherfucker is a motherfucker.” Touché, good sir. Touché.
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Califmom @califmom.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
Paid $7.79/gal for diesel at Costco today. Cool. Cool.
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leemanish.bsky.social @leemanish.bsky.social · 15/09/2026
I get home late, dead tired, and see my name in big, bloody letters on the bedroom wall - and I'm like, nope, I will deal with THIS in the morning
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Califmom @califmom.bsky.social · 08/09/2026
Not sure how much capitalism I have left in me.
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Califmom @califmom.bsky.social · 08/09/2026
Let’s just get honest. Pudding is sweet gravy.
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Califmom @califmom.bsky.social · 05/09/2026
I don’t know how y’all are spending your Friday night, but I got a call from the coroner about a deceased (estranged) family member. Not. On. My. Bingo. Card.
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Califmom @califmom.bsky.social · 02/09/2026
Evidence the ADHD be ADHDing: listening to an audiobook while also reading a physical book…about menopause.
static.klipy.com
The More You Know ADHD Shooting Star
Alt: The More You Know ADHD Shooting Star
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Califmom @califmom.bsky.social · 31/08/2026
I’ve called eggs many things, never fudgy. A clear oversight on my part.
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Califmom @califmom.bsky.social · 28/08/2026
Employers, are you even trying? Bamboo Al operates as one connected intelligence layer across the entire BambooHR platform.
Highlighted in yellow “we request that you do not use AI tools and preparing your written materials”
Highlighted in blue “we do not use AI screening for applicants”
Highlighted in red “ application tracking system, bambooHR”
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Califmom @califmom.bsky.social · 25/08/2026
Capitalism is finding out Dolly died and still having to finish out your shift.
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Noah J. Nelson, Spooky Cat Enthusiast 🎃 @noahjnelson.com · 25/08/2026
THE SCALES MUST BALANCE. ONLY *ONE THING* WILL SUFFICE.
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Erika Hall @erikahall.bsky.social · 23/08/2026
wow, are we doing a good law in CA?
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Califmom @califmom.bsky.social · 20/08/2026
Me: I would like to book a fun vacation. My car: Hold my $6,000 beer.
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Califmom @califmom.bsky.social · 31/07/2026
Posted a single sentence comment to a coworker on an internal app. I used three acronyms in that short sentence. I hate myself.
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Califmom @califmom.bsky.social · 26/07/2026
What’s your sign?
(Not OSHA Approved)
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Califmom @califmom.bsky.social · 25/07/2026
static.klipy.com
Derpy Ouroboros Cartoon
Alt: Derpy Ouroboros Cartoon
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Reposted by Califmom
Reuters @reuters.com · 24/07/2026
EXCLUSIVE: Its AI agent spent days hacking a company, but sources say OpenAI did not notice for a week reut.rs/4fDP5bd
reut.rs
EXCLUSIVE: Its AI agent spent days hacking a company, but sources say OpenAI did not notice for a week
The OpenAI agent that broke into tech firm Hugging Face went on a dayslong hacking spree that OpenAI didn't notice until well after the threat was contained and the FBI was alerted, according ​to people familiar with the investigation.
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Califmom @califmom.bsky.social · 24/07/2026
Yes, speech-to-text — I absolutely meant “desk matt.” And fuck all y’all, that em dash was all me.
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Califmom @califmom.bsky.social · 12/07/2026
I cannot like enough posts about that dead senator. No, the other one.
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Nicholas Venture @nicholasventure.bsky.social · 12/07/2026
I spoke with Mitch McConnell for about 20 minutes tonight and then he was like "Oh, wait Lindsey Graham just showed up, wanna talk to him?"
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Califmom @califmom.bsky.social · 09/07/2026
Keeping a running total of how many dentists text me, “Happy Birthday!” today.
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Califmom @califmom.bsky.social · 03/07/2026
Note to File: Brie makes an excellent pill pocket for dog meds.
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Califmom @califmom.bsky.social · 14/06/2026
If every app could keep moving the search field that would be just fantastic. Center, bottom, top…why not throw it off to the side, make it vertical?
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Califmom @califmom.bsky.social · 30/05/2026
Counting people obviously older than me at the full-to-capacity concert in the park where All-American Rejects are the surprise act. I’m at 5.
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Califmom @califmom.bsky.social · 23/05/2026
Saw an infant being loaded into a cybertruck at Walmart. End. Times.
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Califmom @califmom.bsky.social · 15/05/2026
The best part of the burrito is the anus. This is not a euphemism. I will not elaborate on this correct opinion.
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The Sacramento Observer @sacobserver.com · 14/05/2026
bit.ly/4uLAArw
bit.ly
Unsheltered Homelessness Drops in The City of Sacramento, Ac...
Sacramento sees 19% fewer people living on city streets, a nearly 600-person drop since the last count, even as overall homelessness in Sacramento County rises ...
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Adam Isacson @adamisacson.com · 05/05/2026
Getting rid of Noem and Bovino wasn’t “reform.” Since they left: - DHS has illegally closed the Detention Ombudsman watchdog office. - Asylum grant rates dropped from 22% in Nov to 5% in Feb. - Congress is moving legislation to fund ICE+Border Patrol through 2029—with no reforms or conditions.
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Califmom @califmom.bsky.social · 02/05/2026
Things I have seen on my drive home from Costco: 1. A whole bare ass 2. A grazing ewe on a corner in a residential neighborhood Only the sheep caught me by surprise.
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Califmom @califmom.bsky.social · 26/04/2026
The most unhinged thing you’ll ever read as a woman: “True to size.”
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Califmom @califmom.bsky.social · 26/04/2026
Make America Ballrooms Again? Ew.
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Califmom @califmom.bsky.social · 26/04/2026
My sign?
(Not OSHA Approved)
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Califmom @califmom.bsky.social · 30/03/2026
What’s more fun than sitting in a waiting room with someone watching full volume videos on their phone without headphones? Two people watching full volume videos on their separate phones without headphones.
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Califmom @califmom.bsky.social · 25/03/2026
Master class in audacity.
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Califmom @califmom.bsky.social · 25/03/2026
A humbling feature of returning to school in your 50s is studying history you lived.
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Califmom @califmom.bsky.social · 24/03/2026
In the elevator with the HR rep escorting me to an interview when… Him: have you seen that show called Severance? Me: yup Him: every floor is like that Me: sweet 🤞🏻high hopes for my innie
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Reverend Jesus "🎃" Christ @reverendjesus.com · 17/03/2026
Be the sand you wish to see in the gears Behold The Simple Sabotage Field Manual
cia.gov
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Califmom @califmom.bsky.social · 28/02/2026
I am entirely too Gen X for this timeline.
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