Sign in

BlueMonkeyBoy

@bluemonkeyboy.bsky.social
2.4K followers 647 following 4K posts

Lefty Dem. The chubby kid in high school who lost weight and became a male stripper. Now just a quirky, funny guy with a sarcastic edge living with a chronic autoimmune, neuromuscular disease. Musicals, movies, books, Joe Jackson, Bette Midler

PostsRepliesMedia
BlueMonkeyBoy @bluemonkeyboy.bsky.social · 7m
midwest saying: she's got a face you could chop wood with
000
BlueMonkeyBoy @bluemonkeyboy.bsky.social · 35m
he looks like the Pillsbury Dough Boy with a yeast infection
030
BlueMonkeyBoy @bluemonkeyboy.bsky.social · 19h
tucker is such a whey-faced whiney pigbitch
020
BlueMonkeyBoy @bluemonkeyboy.bsky.social · 22h
mafia nuns: "I want this problem like Maria solved......PERMANENTLY!"
010
BlueMonkeyBoy @bluemonkeyboy.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
comic strip - top of strip says "The Daily Chronicle Comics" under that says "Schmidt For Brains by Greg Willman".
top panel has Senator Eric Schmitt questioning Jack Smith. Schmitt is saying "Mr Smith, isn't it true that you climbed a beanstalk to board the Titanic?"  Bottom panel has Jack Smith looking at Schmitt like he is a total Schmitt-head.
000
BlueMonkeyBoy @bluemonkeyboy.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
or starring in "Encino Man 2: Electric Boogaloo"
000
BlueMonkeyBoy @bluemonkeyboy.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
he looks like he smells of the frying vat oil he has to strain and refill every night before he leaves by the rear door of the corn dog stand and heads to Hooters....
000
BlueMonkeyBoy @bluemonkeyboy.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
like a 102-year-old that has hit a rough patch
060
BlueMonkeyBoy @bluemonkeyboy.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
"buffoon" would be an upgrade
230
BlueMonkeyBoy @bluemonkeyboy.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
he's trying to figure out how to do the Hokey Pokey? www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZKM5...
youtube.com
Barney Song : The Hokey Pokey (Hi, Neighbor !)
YouTube video by BarneySongs
000
BlueMonkeyBoy @bluemonkeyboy.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
is it just me, or does trump look like he buys his suits from failed burlesque comics?
010
BlueMonkeyBoy @bluemonkeyboy.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
kevin's middle name should rightfully be "duuuuuuuuuuuuuuuh duuuuuuuuuuuuhhh duuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuhhhwayne"
001
BlueMonkeyBoy @bluemonkeyboy.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
pratt really living up to that last name, innit he?
030
BlueMonkeyBoy @bluemonkeyboy.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
I thought Arctic Frost was the code name for melania? I mean, why else does the furnace kick on every time she enters a room?
000
BlueMonkeyBoy @bluemonkeyboy.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
marsha's been huffing the Aqua Net again...
close up picture of three cans of Aqua Net Professional Hair Spray. 
Left is a purple can of Super Hold, middle is a turquoise can of Unscented, right is a red can of All Purpose.
031
BlueMonkeyBoy @bluemonkeyboy.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
I think the only men checking out trump are these dudes....
color picture of two "plague doctors" from the days of the Bubonic Plague, wearing beaked, birdlike face masks of metal (or leather) and full protective clothing and cloaks and broad brimmed hats.
010
BlueMonkeyBoy @bluemonkeyboy.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
me too praying for a brain exploding is still praying, right?
010
BlueMonkeyBoy @bluemonkeyboy.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
"DOGE Membership" aka "The Teeny-Weeny Peeny Patrol"
010
BlueMonkeyBoy @bluemonkeyboy.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
there's a difference between cheap and downright tasteless / tacky.
050
BlueMonkeyBoy @bluemonkeyboy.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
doctored picture showing senator schmitt-head and foghorn blowhorn kennedy at the Jack Smith "investigation" holding up a damning photo of Wile E. Coyote blowing himself up.
061
BlueMonkeyBoy @bluemonkeyboy.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
is it just me or do prostitutes in Fellini movies have a better concept of how to wear make-up?
000
BlueMonkeyBoy @bluemonkeyboy.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
he'd probably just write "quiet, piggy" 500 times and call it a day
000
BlueMonkeyBoy @bluemonkeyboy.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
while the teacher spends those two hours behind the gym, chain-smoking Pall Malls and sending white-supremacist texts
000
BlueMonkeyBoy @bluemonkeyboy.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
will he be using his Artful Dodger "'Cor Blimey Guv, it's a fair cop..." voice?
000
BlueMonkeyBoy @bluemonkeyboy.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
midwest saying: If I had a rat's ass, I still wouldn't give it.
0190
BlueMonkeyBoy @bluemonkeyboy.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
she doesn't really want to talk politics, unless there's a hefty cash payment delivered by cabana boys in Speedos before each appearance
070
BlueMonkeyBoy @bluemonkeyboy.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
he looks like he scrounges for food from a dumpster behind a Piggly Wiggly, but sure....
001
BlueMonkeyBoy @bluemonkeyboy.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
well, I'm sure THAT will make grocery and gasoline prices go down....
000
BlueMonkeyBoy @bluemonkeyboy.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
cryptkeeper really rockin' that blonde wig
000
BlueMonkeyBoy @bluemonkeyboy.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
does he know his barber obviously hates him?
020
BlueMonkeyBoy @bluemonkeyboy.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
I sort by highest rating and narrow it down from there
000
BlueMonkeyBoy @bluemonkeyboy.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
don't know if I HATE trump but I can say the only picture I ever want to see of him would be a chalk outline on the floor of a crime scene bonus points if it includes melania being led away in handcuffs and not the fur-lined kind Actually I HATE TRUMP ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
000
BlueMonkeyBoy @bluemonkeyboy.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
fetterman's about as deep as an inflatable kiddy pool.
000
BlueMonkeyBoy @bluemonkeyboy.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
static.klipy.com
Animation Cartoons
Alt: gif from Family Guy with Peter hiding behind a tree, holding a rope that is attached to an anvil hidden in the tree. Peter has baited the trap by placing a dollar bill on the sidewalk in front of the tree, then forgets he put it there and all excited about finding a dollar on the sidewalk, he lets go of the rope to reach for the dollar and gets hit by the anvil.
000
BlueMonkeyBoy @bluemonkeyboy.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
like if Gollum went to the prom?
000
BlueMonkeyBoy @bluemonkeyboy.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
“If you’re evil… maybe you’re actually kind of good” is right up there with "Hitting yourself repeatedly in the head with a sledge-hammer makes you appreciate it when you stop"
041
BlueMonkeyBoy @bluemonkeyboy.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
can't this hatchet-faced harpy find some old, abandoned bell tower to retire to?
000
BlueMonkeyBoy @bluemonkeyboy.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
he looks like he'd condemn mayonnaise as "The Devil's Condiment!!"
000
BlueMonkeyBoy @bluemonkeyboy.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
he looks like he parks his unmarked white van near childrens playgrounds and plays ice cream truck music over his speakers
000
BlueMonkeyBoy @bluemonkeyboy.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
once trump has been removed from office, either by impeachment or death, his pictures should be replaced by a dumpster fire for his first term, and a pic from "The Walking Dead" showing zombie hordes shuffling mindlessly for the second term.
010
BlueMonkeyBoy @bluemonkeyboy.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
they're as similar as two peas in a pod or two skanks in a dark alley
010
BlueMonkeyBoy @bluemonkeyboy.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
his screen saver is probably dancing chicken nuggets against a background of juice boxes
020
BlueMonkeyBoy @bluemonkeyboy.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
serious question can any actual picture of eric "I Eat Library Paste" trump be termed a glamour shot? he's gives the word "fugly" a run for its money
000
BlueMonkeyBoy @bluemonkeyboy.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
of course math scores are at a 25 year low. to the MAGAts if it's higher than fingers and toes, it don't exist.
000
BlueMonkeyBoy @bluemonkeyboy.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
to quote the sage wisdom of Lou Grant: www.youtube.com/watch?v=0cHS...
youtube.com
Lou Grant - "You've got spunk!" - Mary Tyler Moore
YouTube video by QuantumBuc
010
BlueMonkeyBoy @bluemonkeyboy.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
rumor has it that ed sheeran wanted to be a schoolteacher, but he couldn't control his pupils.... thank you, thank you, here all week and don't forget to tip your wait-person.
040
BlueMonkeyBoy @bluemonkeyboy.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
and they'll probably get that "Big Balls" asswipe to head it up
picture of an incel with a crappy hairstyle and a punchable face, who couldn't get laid in a cathouse with a mouthful of $100 dollar bills, who goes by the moniker "Big Balls" because, obviously, his testicles have yet to descend but his mommy reassures him it'll be any day now, as she serves him his snack of chicken nuggies and juicebox.
000
BlueMonkeyBoy @bluemonkeyboy.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
the extra $7 million is to expand his personal team of road-kill shoppers
000
BlueMonkeyBoy @bluemonkeyboy.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
static.klipy.com
Mermaid Man's Evil Scream with SpongeBob
Alt: Clip from Spongebob Squarepants with Mermaid Man screaming "Evil. EEEEEEEEVVVIIIILLLLL!" as he runs around the lobby of the home.
010
BlueMonkeyBoy @bluemonkeyboy.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
also mike lee (probably) "I'd also like to see trump throw a pile of dirty shirts at xi and say 'no starch, no hangers'."
000