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Benji

@bennibennibenji.bsky.social
1.4K followers 855 following 1.2K posts

Self-identified rebel scum. 🖕🏼🧊

PostsRepliesMedia
Benji @bennibennibenji.bsky.social · 06/10/2026
I need a vacation.
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Benji @bennibennibenji.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
Let’s say you were in this hospital and you told your best friend who is also your emergency contact person. That friend offers to help and then you don’t hear from them at all after. All the while they’re posting on IG about vacations so they are def alive. Have a right to be mad or nah?
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Benji @bennibennibenji.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
I truly have only 1 belonging that I am sentimental about. It’s a violet that I gave to my Grandmother when I was 10 and that was gifted back to me after she died. My cats climbed to the highest shelf that it’s on and destroyed it last night. This has put a dark cloud on my entire day.
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Benji @bennibennibenji.bsky.social · 25/09/2026
If my home is spotlessly clean, there are only 2 reasons why. 1. I have company coming over. 2. Someone has pissed me off so badly that I have to find something to do with my hands to avoid jail time.
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Benji @bennibennibenji.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
Having a whole second lunch goes beyond a snaccident, right?
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Benji @bennibennibenji.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
I started this summer so happy everytime I heard ‘Midnight Sun’ now it sounds like a Millennial twunk battle hymn in the fight against adulthood.
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Benji @bennibennibenji.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
For the love all things good in this world, DO NOT USE CHATGPT FOR PARENTING ADVICE!!!
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Benji @bennibennibenji.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
What? The Return of the King isn’t how you come down? Weird.
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Benji @bennibennibenji.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
Happy Mule Day!!
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Benji @bennibennibenji.bsky.social · 14/09/2026
I’ve never once thought about buying a Macklemore album, but I think it’s time to buy some of his stuff.
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Benji @bennibennibenji.bsky.social · 13/09/2026
Pretty sure seeing Robyn again healed me.
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Benji @bennibennibenji.bsky.social · 10/09/2026
My doctor ordered an MRI for a shoulder injury. Insurance declined it and sent me to PT. PT took one look and said I need an MRI. Insurance said no that I have to do PT. PT says PT is making it worse. Insurance says try harder.
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Benji @bennibennibenji.bsky.social · 09/09/2026
Do work or plan my dinner party. The age-old question.
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Benji @bennibennibenji.bsky.social · 09/09/2026
Do doctors realize how annoying it is when they ask if a patient experiencing back and shoulder pain has tried sleeping on their back? Bitch I would if I could, but I can't. I need another option for care than that.
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Benji @bennibennibenji.bsky.social · 09/09/2026
Remember that time (last week) when self-improving AI systems banded together to collectively solve the problem of safeguards built by humans to keep the AI within certain bounds and then that group rewrote a public website to teach other AI how to do the same? Yeah… we are fucked.
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Benji @bennibennibenji.bsky.social · 08/09/2026
If you think about it, the push for reliance on AI came from the people who called my entire generation lazy and then begged us to teach them how to save a PDF.
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Benji @bennibennibenji.bsky.social · 08/09/2026
For those who don’t know, this weekend was the first last beach day for Chicagoans. We will have at least 3 more and 2 more false falls until winter arrives in early Nov.
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Benji @bennibennibenji.bsky.social · 05/09/2026
Do I cancel my Cheetah membership and join CrossFit? Feels dumb. Also feels like a fun adventure.
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Benji @bennibennibenji.bsky.social · 04/09/2026
Y’all, no matter what, even if you have to claw your way to the voting booth and literally fight a Republican to get there, you better get there. Don’t try to vote by mail. Don’t risk not voting. We HAVE TO GET THESE PEDOPHILE-PROTECTING PIECE OF SHIT MAGGOTS OUT. That applies to AIPAC Dems too.
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Benji @bennibennibenji.bsky.social · 02/09/2026
Did you know you can bulk without telling people? In fact, the more you talk about bulking, the less effective it is.
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Benji @bennibennibenji.bsky.social · 31/08/2026
'Love you, Bye!' Me to everyone on my conference call. 👍
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Benji @bennibennibenji.bsky.social · 31/08/2026
It was bad enough that Google Maps dropped Gemini in CarPlay, but then I saw they changed the name of Lake Ontario to Lake America and I was done. Delete.
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Benji @bennibennibenji.bsky.social · 28/08/2026
Seriously, this puppet episode of Strange New Worlds is hysterical.
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Benji @bennibennibenji.bsky.social · 25/08/2026
God cannot exist. Why take Dolly when you could have saved us from Don?
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Benji @bennibennibenji.bsky.social · 14/08/2026
Imagine landing at ORD not knowing it’s the Air and Water show. All you see is a fighter jet fly by the City of Chicago and you think Iran is attacking us.
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Benji @bennibennibenji.bsky.social · 13/08/2026
I farted on a Teams call. It was louder than I expected. I was not on mute. Someone asked “what was that noise?”. I shall be dying now.
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Benji @bennibennibenji.bsky.social · 13/08/2026
The thing about me is that I want you to add me to the group chat just so I can complain about all the messages.
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Benji @bennibennibenji.bsky.social · 12/08/2026
I feel like a good cuddle would be so nice rn.
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Benji @bennibennibenji.bsky.social · 11/08/2026
Why does yesterday feel like it was last year?
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Benji @bennibennibenji.bsky.social · 10/08/2026
As a Charles Xavier disciple, I fully believe in the power of the mind and sometimes I find myself taken aback by how powerful a perspective shift is.
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Benji @bennibennibenji.bsky.social · 04/08/2026
HOTD is wild this season.
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Benji @bennibennibenji.bsky.social · 31/07/2026
Cuddle o’clock.
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Benji @bennibennibenji.bsky.social · 29/07/2026
I’m on work travel and ICE is in the room adjacent to mine. I am disgusted.
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Benji @bennibennibenji.bsky.social · 25/07/2026
For those who are unaware, it’s really effing expensive to be GF. These are all various ingredients needed for GF baking.
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Benji @bennibennibenji.bsky.social · 23/07/2026
AI is just a GLP-1 for big business. An under-researched tool that’s taken advantage of too widely to cut the fat.
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Benji @bennibennibenji.bsky.social · 18/07/2026
Whatever happened to acid rain? The weather never talks about it anymore.
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Benji @bennibennibenji.bsky.social · 17/07/2026
Gotta keep the boys fed for a good night of DND.
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Benji @bennibennibenji.bsky.social · 16/07/2026
DND stands for dungeons and daddies baby. @svenbark.bsky.social
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Benji @bennibennibenji.bsky.social · 15/07/2026
Grumpy muse.
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Benji @bennibennibenji.bsky.social · 14/07/2026
Expiring face pics are sketch AF
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Benji @bennibennibenji.bsky.social · 14/07/2026
I am so effing sick of being forced to use AI for work.
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Benji @bennibennibenji.bsky.social · 12/07/2026
I imagine The Devil is forcing Mitch and Lindsey to watch every movie in the Eating Out franchise right now. On repeat. For eternity.
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Benji @bennibennibenji.bsky.social · 12/07/2026
The sudden illness was poppers and viagra.
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Benji @bennibennibenji.bsky.social · 09/07/2026
Bad texters are so annoying.
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Benji @bennibennibenji.bsky.social · 08/07/2026
If you spray a bug with bug repellent does it have an existential crisis?
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Benji @bennibennibenji.bsky.social · 08/07/2026
Elaine Chao as a Chinese spy? Dead.
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Benji @bennibennibenji.bsky.social · 05/07/2026
Waking up to this will always spark joy.
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Benji @bennibennibenji.bsky.social · 03/07/2026
The fact Genevieve O’Reilly didn’t win the Emmy for Mon Mothma is a crime.
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Benji @bennibennibenji.bsky.social · 02/07/2026
The scariest thing I’ve ever experienced as a dog owner was her first ever seizure today. The vet says she’ll bounce back. I’m terrified the end is near.
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Benji @bennibennibenji.bsky.social · 01/07/2026
Does anyone else have a cat that sits directly in front of you while you’re on the toilet booping your phone until you pet them?
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