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Azban

@azban.bsky.social
447 followers 360 following 8.5K posts

Just a typical Masshole with a heart of gold (mostly purloined from involuntary donations)

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Azban @azban.bsky.social · 1h
Every raccoon is sacred! Every racc is great!
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Azban @azban.bsky.social · 1h
Every raccoon is needed in your neighborhood
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Introvert Problems @introvertproblems.bsky.social · 1h
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Azban @azban.bsky.social · 1h
Military star card actually has decent rewards stuff. 60 and 20 dollar gift cards
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pmamtraveller.bsky.social @pmamtraveller.bsky.social · 2h
Medieval Rabbits beating up a man
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Bluegal Fran Langum #NoKings @bluegal.bsky.social · 15h
Via BoredPanda.com
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Azban @azban.bsky.social · 4h
MOAR RACCOONS!
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Temiree ☀️🦦 @temiree.bsky.social · 13h
Commission for @shirou14.bsky.social! These two are brothers, named Alec and Ricky, with Ricky being the rogueish one giving a noogie. 🦝🦝
Ricky and Alec are two anthro/furry raccoon brothers, with the latter dressed rogueishly and the other dressed more formally with a jacket, and carrying a staff that looks like a clawed hand with a flower on the palm. Both are in the middle of a forest after dusk (or perhaps early morning), and Ricky has Alec in a headlock, giving him a noogie, with Alec responding with a huge grin as he struggles.
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Raccoons Hourly @raccoonhourly.bsky.social · 6h
An adorable raccoon.
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Azban @azban.bsky.social · 4h
What if we had the option to cast an anti-vote. If there's no one running you actually like, you can anti-vote for the person you hate the most and cancel out one of their votes.
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Raccoons Hourly @raccoonhourly.bsky.social · 5h
An adorable raccoon.
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Azban @azban.bsky.social · 4h
Like waffs bathe... *Hides*
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Azban @azban.bsky.social · 4h
I just woke up on my own cause I'd been asleep 12 hours lol
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🚬 Chappie Frog ➡️ Commissions OPEN @grumpyfart.bsky.social · 10/10/2026
🌆🌆
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Azban @azban.bsky.social · 5h
Let me love you!
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Azban @azban.bsky.social · 6h
Went to bed at 8 and got up at 8 didn't even realize I needed that rest.
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Raccoons Hourly @raccoonhourly.bsky.social · 20h
An adorable raccoon.
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Azban @azban.bsky.social · 22h
Then you must fear me
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Azban @azban.bsky.social · 22h
A tiger can't defeat a goose.
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Azban @azban.bsky.social · 22h
That tiger is lucky it escaped with its life.
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The Onion @theonion.com · 23h
Forward-Thinking CEO Hoping Company Can Capture New Audience By Making Product Worse In Every Conceivable Way theonion.com/forward-thinking-ceo-h…
Forward-Thinking CEO Hoping Company Can Capture New Audience By Making Product Worse In Every Conceivable Way
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Azban @azban.bsky.social · 23h
Running is my least favorite form of exercise.
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Azban @azban.bsky.social · 23h
Show us your adorable skrunkle
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𖤐 Harvester of Sbarro 𖤐 @harvesterofsbarro.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
I drew a skunk.
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pmamtraveller.bsky.social @pmamtraveller.bsky.social · 10/10/2026
By Luce Bahzi
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Azban @azban.bsky.social · 10/10/2026
Do wolves know that their skrunkly noses are adorable rather than scary?
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Deep Hurting 🐈🐈‍⬛𓃠 Cats of Antifa @deep-hurting.bsky.social · 10/10/2026
#Cats
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Azban @azban.bsky.social · 10/10/2026
Er herm....
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Azban @azban.bsky.social · 10/10/2026
Yes give me all your coffee.
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Molly Templeton @mollytempleton.com · 10/10/2026
no idea who made this but I think of that random person with gratitude every time I heat up any sort of wraplike food object in the microwave
two scenes from an X-Men animated program: in the first, scott summers and jean gray are making out; he is labeled "microwave heat" and she is labeled "plate." in the second, we are more distant from the couple, and wolverine is standing in the foreground, labeled "my burrito."
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derek guy @dieworkwear.bsky.social · 10/10/2026
good lord how can anyone be this whiny; are you not ashamed
Donald Trump writes on Truth Social: "This is the woman who received the Nobel Peace Prize over the Great United States of America, whose Representative, ME, settled eight Wars, and many other things. I know nothing about this woman, and neither does anyone else! In fact, to the best of my knowledge, no one ever heard of her other than the fact that she, very obviously, hates Israel. I don’t know what the woman has done. I settled 8 Wars, with letters being sent from every President and Prime Minister from the countries that I helped to the Norwegian Nobel Committee, and I’m about to settle, or win, two more, Iran and, Russia/Ukraine. They’re both happening at breakneck speed but, forget them, it’s the 8 that I’ve already settled, any one of which, in particular, Pakistan and India, would be far more than necessary to win the Nobel Prize. In actuality, I should have won 8 Nobel Peace Prizes, not just 1. The 8 Wars are:"Donald Trump writes on Truth Social: "Cambodia and Thailand
Kosovo and Serbia
The Democratic Republic of the Congo and Rwanda
Pakistan and India
Israel and Iran
Egypt and Ethiopia
Armenia and Azerbaijan
Israel and Hamas
Additionally, I stopped Iran from having a Nuclear Weapon, and blowing up the entire Middle East and, ultimately, far beyond! I saved more lives than anyone in History and, as Maria Corina Machado, a truly fine person, stated to the Media when she gave me her Nobel Prize of last year, “Donald Trump settled many Wars, and deserves the Nobel Peace Prize more than any person that has ever received it.” Based on my record of PEACE, a record like no one else has ever achieved, I agree! I got back all of the hostages in Israel, including the final 28, both living and dead, and worked with Hamas to"
Donald Trump writes on Truth Social: "PEACE, a record like no one else has ever achieved, I agree! I got back all of the hostages in Israel, including the final 28, both living and dead, and worked with Hamas to do it — Nobody believed this was possible! I removed the World’s Evil Dictator, Nicolas Maduro, from Venezuela, and am in the process of making Venezuela a rich Democracy. Likewise, with Iran, I stopped them from destroying Israel, the Middle East, and Europe. I am also preventing, on a constant basis, a War between South Korea and North Korea, and Japan and North Korea. Add China and Taiwan, and numerous other hot spots, which have not been involved in Wars, only because of President Donald J. Trump, and the United States of America. I am responsible for having NATO countries increase spending from 2% to 5% of GDP, creating a stronger alliance and defense, another thing that everybody said was impossible to do. I have negotiated the release, and secured the return, of more than 900 political prisoners from multiple countries"Donald Trump writes on Truth Social: "another thing that everybody said was impossible to do. I have negotiated the release, and secured the return, of more than 900 political prisoners from multiple countries in Eastern Europe. Additionally, I have brought 196 hostages HOME from captivity, from all over the World, and did it without having paid a ransom, unlike Biden and Obama who would pay Billions of Dollars. On top of it all, I have created a soon to be very prosperous Arctic. Despite all of this, the Nobel Prize was given today to a liberal person who works at the United Nations, who nobody has ever heard of. In all of the Wars that I have settled, I never spoke to the United Nations—they were of no help. The United States of America, represented by me, as your President, should have received the Nobel Peace Prize, but didn’t. This is an indelible stain on Norway, one that will never be forgotten. The Nobel “Peace” Prize has been forever discredited by a handful of Radical Ideologues who are Anti-Democracy, and Enemies of Civilization! President DONALD J. TRUMP"
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Azban @azban.bsky.social · 10/10/2026
I never eat on an empty stomach.
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The Onion @theonion.com · 09/10/2026
World’s Largest Dinosaur Shoe Print Discovered In Australia theonion.com/world-s-largest-dinosa…
World’s Largest Dinosaur Shoe Print Discovered In Australia
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Azban @azban.bsky.social · 10/10/2026
How I run away from my problems.
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Azban @azban.bsky.social · 10/10/2026
Sure I do!
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Azban @azban.bsky.social · 10/10/2026
Tiger steaks.
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Azban @azban.bsky.social · 10/10/2026
Mmmmmmm chimken thighs and shweeet pertater
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Azban @azban.bsky.social · 10/10/2026
Sin-handed *Hides*
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Azban @azban.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
Ugh, so hungry. Dinner is cooking but the urge to snack right now is high. Must resist!
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The Onion @theonion.com · 09/10/2026
White House Downplays Hyena Biting Down On Trump’s Ass theonion.com/white-house-downplays-…
White House Downplays Hyena Biting Down On Trump’s Ass
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Raccoons Hourly @raccoonhourly.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
An adorable raccoon.
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Azban @azban.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
You've been binging Townsend, haven't you?
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derek guy @dieworkwear.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
i've identified the Dockers store where Michael Tracy bought and then subsequently returned these pants after wearing them. i will be pursuing criminal prosecution.
Michael Tracey in a light blue sport coat and tan chinos.A close up of the chinos show the sizing sticker is still on the pants.
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Azban @azban.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
Sarah Otter?
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Daily Wah (red pandas) @dailywah.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
Daily red panda Toshi playing with a snack filled toy!
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Azban @azban.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
That's me Trashy Chahms! They're rabidly delicious!
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Raccoons Hourly @raccoonhourly.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
An adorable raccoon.
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Azban @azban.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
Chitterdyne Systems Model 101
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Azban @azban.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
Was so much creepier when Arnold said it in one, though :P
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Azban @azban.bsky.social · 09/10/2026
Get out.
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