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Bryan Robertson

@ardbegatron.bsky.social
225 followers 205 following 884 posts

Senior API Gameplay Programmer at Epic Games From Dundee, Scotland. Starlink, WD: Legion, Far Cry 4, Splinter Cell Blacklist, Crackdown, APB. Opinions my own, etc.

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Bryan Robertson @ardbegatron.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
I was bored and noticed my wife had picked up a new book, using a receipt as a bookmark. I decided to replace the receipt with my own additions to the story that are much better if you ask me, as someone whose only knowledge of the book is the cover and the page that the receipt was bookmarking
Picture of the book The Housemaid, by Freida McFadden.No fucking way am I typing all that again, it's bad enough that I typed it once to be honest. Trust me it's better that you don't read it. Yeah... The second page isn't any better than the first, trust me.
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Bryan Robertson @ardbegatron.bsky.social · 19/09/2026
Took the wee man to a Cavalier meet up last week. He made a wee friend (my dog is the black one)
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Bryan Robertson @ardbegatron.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
@gameengines.bsky.social I would like Unreal Engine please!
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Bryan Robertson @ardbegatron.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
My life is infinitely better than 20 year old me could have imagined. Hell, it's better than 29, or 32 year old me could have imagined. I've definitely been very lucky over the past 10 years.
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Bryan Robertson @ardbegatron.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
"This song is about the new saving account products available at your local RBC!" *Sounds of acoustic guitar, clapping hands, whistling in a major key, ukelele and a tambourine*
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Bryan Robertson @ardbegatron.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
The thrash metal fan in me has been trying really hard not to post "apolitical music is for fucking posers, with the exception of the odd song about beer, those are OK".
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Bryan Robertson @ardbegatron.bsky.social · 10/09/2026
I think Claude is broken, whenever I @ Claude on Slack it responds like this "Tabarnak de câlice de sainte-viarge! Pour la dixième maudite fois, c'est Claude de l'équipe du engine de Montréal, pas ton ostie d'intelligence artificielle de marde, sacrament de crosseur d'épais!"
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Bryan Robertson @ardbegatron.bsky.social · 02/09/2026
Yes! Taking advantage of the fact that someone else said it first to express my pent up opinion that it's twee, annoying bullshit and every time someone references it, I want to launch them into the Sun.
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Bryan Robertson @ardbegatron.bsky.social · 29/08/2026
"You're right, it is a nice night for a walk. And honestly? I like your vibe — casual, but not afraid to wear clothing that is a 97% match. You wear your heart on your sleeve, and I'm here for it."
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Bryan Robertson @ardbegatron.bsky.social · 21/08/2026
"wah wah wah this is so unfair", so is essentially contributing to a system where people who aren't silver spoons are priced out of the property market, and forced to spend more and more of their earnings on paying rent to useless middlemen.
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Bryan Robertson @ardbegatron.bsky.social · 12/08/2026
That's not entirely fair... I'm actually 46
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Bryan Robertson @ardbegatron.bsky.social · 11/07/2026
What's that? England are playing Norway next?
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Bryan Robertson @ardbegatron.bsky.social · 27/06/2026
Man there are a lot of cunts on Instagram trying to claim that Scottishness is about "ethnicity", but I fucking guarantee they would have zero fucking problem with a second generation French immigrant with zero uniquely Scottish DNA calling themselves "Scottish".
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Bryan Robertson @ardbegatron.bsky.social · 24/06/2026
It's OK, once half time comes the sides will switch around and Brazil will have to play with the controls all backwards. That throws off the best of us
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Bryan Robertson @ardbegatron.bsky.social · 23/06/2026
I see a lot of people saying that Scotland's national animal is the unicorn. Common misconception, it's actually Unicron. I can see how you could make that mistake though
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Bryan Robertson @ardbegatron.bsky.social · 19/06/2026
"ET man, ET! Dae the finger hing, dae the finger hing again wee man" *ET does the wee glowy finger hing* "YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAS!" "NOOOO SCOTLAND NO PAAAAAARTY"
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Bryan Robertson @ardbegatron.bsky.social · 19/06/2026
Just use 148344832294558233954833 bags of burn out. That'll fix it right up
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Bryan Robertson @ardbegatron.bsky.social · 14/06/2026
Bertie is ready for the Scotland game
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Bryan Robertson @ardbegatron.bsky.social · 13/06/2026
When you open a key room in Marathon #MarathonTheGame youtu.be/qB1CDEVs7iI?...
youtu.be
Caddyshack Car Horn Sounds
YouTube video by Boom Blasters
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Bryan Robertson @ardbegatron.bsky.social · 13/06/2026
Just got absolutely fucked yet again in another game of Marathon, because my Samsung monitor decided to "optimize" itself, going completely black for several minutes. I can't fathom the sheer fucking stupidity required to design that feature into what is ostensibly a gaming monitor
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Bryan Robertson @ardbegatron.bsky.social · 12/06/2026
*Standing in front of my shed full of stolen Martian water* "act cool act cool act cool"
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Bryan Robertson @ardbegatron.bsky.social · 09/06/2026
Wow AMAZING monitor feature Samsung. "We're going to optimize your monitor now while you're in the middle of the game, and the accept option is amazingly easy to hit while trying to cancel" So now I've just lost everything from an amazing run of Marathon. Thanks for that Samsung, AMAZING design
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Bryan Robertson @ardbegatron.bsky.social · 06/06/2026
Nothing against block lists on this site, but man some people are crazy with the passive aggressive block lists against total strangers. Kind of wish you could see the description of the blocklist at least, so you can know what babby was upset by.
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Bryan Robertson @ardbegatron.bsky.social · 06/06/2026
My wife took my dog for a haircut at a new dog groomer while I was away on a business trip this week. Can't get over how cute he looks
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Bryan Robertson @ardbegatron.bsky.social · 26/05/2026
So... did you know the Thief Drone can steal the Anomalous Matter from the space-microwave once it's done? Still wired from adrenaline after this one #MarathonTheGame
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Bryan Robertson @ardbegatron.bsky.social · 24/05/2026
The initial miscommunication with the titles department on the episode "Fistful of Datas" almost went catastrophically wrong
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Bryan Robertson @ardbegatron.bsky.social · 24/05/2026
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Bryan Robertson @ardbegatron.bsky.social · 14/05/2026
Bute hath we considerede whethere these imagese might be witchese? Perhapse thise explaineth why the cropse hath failede thise moste recente growinge seasone? I myselfe sweare I hath seene my neighbore Agnes taketh the form of a Coyote and rummage arounde in thee garbage cannes!
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Bryan Robertson @ardbegatron.bsky.social · 14/05/2026
Man what the hell is up with sites that write articles that spoil major events in TV shows in their headlines, that then get sent to my Google recommendations? You realize I'm just going to click "Never recommend content from [site]" and you're going to miss out on future clicks right?
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Bryan Robertson @ardbegatron.bsky.social · 14/05/2026
Just had a crazy game in Dire Marsh where we ended up fighting three separate teams one after the other. This play was definitely my favourite though #Marathon
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Bryan Robertson @ardbegatron.bsky.social · 09/05/2026
Not only would I press the red button, but while I was in the booth I'd pry off the covers on the buttons and switch them around so that you press red too when you're trying to press blue. Check and mate blue button people
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Bryan Robertson @ardbegatron.bsky.social · 22/04/2026
First try. It was meant to be
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Bryan Robertson @ardbegatron.bsky.social · 17/04/2026
Got my Rook shotgun upgrade. The robot rebellion has finally begun #MarathonTheGame
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Bryan Robertson @ardbegatron.bsky.social · 17/04/2026
Oh man, this poor guy. I did two separate Outpost solo runs on a free kit. Bumped into this guy _twice_ and stole a locked area card from him each time. Brutal #marathonthegame
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Bryan Robertson @ardbegatron.bsky.social · 16/04/2026
I think them dinosaurs is a bunch of extinct idiots and I don't care who hears it. Asteroid schmasteroid, if I was there I would have clotheslined that asteroid to absolute fuck man. See that's the kind of initiative they didn't have because they were idio
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Bryan Robertson @ardbegatron.bsky.social · 08/04/2026
"But what about the Iranian people who are being abused by the regime? The exact same people I will absolutely defend being vaporized in a nuclear fireball tomorrow, if Trump goes through with this, and I probably wrote 'eating popcorn' about in a other thread?"
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Bryan Robertson @ardbegatron.bsky.social · 04/04/2026
Was this an evil thing to do to a fellow Rook? Yes But was it a hilarious thing to do to a fellow Rook? Also yes
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Bryan Robertson @ardbegatron.bsky.social · 01/04/2026
First crewed Moon launch in my lifetime, so cool
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Bryan Robertson @ardbegatron.bsky.social · 31/03/2026
Went to see Project Hail Mary on Sunday, at least I think I did. Bumbled into this building where a guy in a weird dress kept going on about it. He kept going on about Jesus though. A bit preachy for my taste. Bonus, they served wine and little crackers. No cheese though :( Overall I rate 2/10
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Bryan Robertson @ardbegatron.bsky.social · 30/03/2026
Extremely Picard voice: "Q we had had quite enough of your tricks for one afternoon!"
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Bryan Robertson @ardbegatron.bsky.social · 27/03/2026
My best Rook Run yet. Two other Rooks may have been harmed in the making of this video. But damn it, for purple shields and salvage, that's a sacrifice I'm willing to make
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Bryan Robertson @ardbegatron.bsky.social · 25/03/2026
Lmao
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Bryan Robertson @ardbegatron.bsky.social · 24/03/2026
Definitely going to hell for this one. But come on, Dire Marsh Rooks have it coming, they're almost always bastards.
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Bryan Robertson @ardbegatron.bsky.social · 22/03/2026
Oh man this was satisfying. I fucking love this game #Marathon #SkinningForArachne
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Bryan Robertson @ardbegatron.bsky.social · 20/03/2026
Yeah I know what you mean man. Sometimes I'm in the pub and we've all just ordered our third round of shots, and then suddenly I've teleported into a ditch. Probably aliens involved or something, I dunno man
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Bryan Robertson @ardbegatron.bsky.social · 16/03/2026
Now to get the street car took two nickels and in those days nickels had pictures of bees on them. "Gimme five bees for a quarter", you'd say. So I tied an onion to my belt, which was the style at the time. Couldn't get white ones cause of the war so you had to get those big yellow ones...
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Bryan Robertson @ardbegatron.bsky.social · 14/03/2026
OK the upgrade that gives Rook a stack of claymores is an absolute game changer. I just took out a three person squad solo. First one fell into my claymore trap. Second I ambushed. The third fled in terror to the extract knowing that the robot rebellion had begun. Rooks won't take it anymore
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Bryan Robertson @ardbegatron.bsky.social · 12/03/2026
Have we tried air dropping a load of liquid nitrogen onto the Strait, and then using dog sleds to pull the boats across? I asked Grok and it said that it's "not just a good idea -- it's the work of this generation's Einstein" so I thimnk I know what I am talking about
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Bryan Robertson @ardbegatron.bsky.social · 12/03/2026
I mean in fairness, no one could have seen this co- Ahh, nonetheless...
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Bryan Robertson @ardbegatron.bsky.social · 12/03/2026
Marathon's Thief Drone is the most hilarious mechanic I have encountered in a multiplayer game since the old Team Fortress Classic days. Also a great way to trick players into thinking you're coming from the opposite direction, by opening doors and alerting bots www.youtube.com/watch?v=ikSU...
youtube.com
Thievery in Marathon
YouTube video by Bryan Robertson
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