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Angry People in Local Newspapers

@apiln.bsky.social
21K followers 85 following 12K posts

Angry People in Local Newspapers - Weird news - Bizarre headlines - Wild animals and ghosts which are actually cats - Bonkers billboards. Regret to report that people are still taking this account seriously. Avatar image by @tpneenan.bsky.social.

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Angry People in Local Newspapers @apiln.bsky.social · 2h
“Jobs not Rubble” is the title of a 1960 episode of The Flintstones where Fred leads a campaign to get Barney sacked from the quarry. nation.cymru/news/council...
nation.cymru
Council defends Wilko store demolition as campaigners push for leisure centre
Nation.Cymru staff A council has defended plans to demolish a former Wilko store amid calls to save the building and turn it into a family entertainment centre. Carmarthenshire County Council says the...
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Angry People in Local Newspapers @apiln.bsky.social · 4h
I know the answer to this one! Corrie star Julie Hesmondhalgh is a Celebrity Traitors contestant.
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Angry People in Local Newspapers @apiln.bsky.social · 6h
“You know who else banned jazz and organised rallies?” Reader, they went there.
iomtoday.co.im
A blue note - jazz festival organiser says car rally will shut down hospitality
‘Hitler hated jazz and banned it completely - instead he organised rallies!’
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Angry People in Local Newspapers @apiln.bsky.social · 9h
We hoped we could hear Jeff’s “Lament for the ten-day closure of Redhall Lane for vital tree-work” for the bagpipes and fiddle, but he is trapped in his own home.
watfordobserver.co.uk
Pensioner laments 10-day closure of 'lifeline' major road
A Hertfordshire pensioner has said a 10-day-closure of a major road has cut him off from vital services.
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Angry People in Local Newspapers @apiln.bsky.social · 11h
Meanwhile in Kenya:
Samburu Newsflash
8 Jan • O
• • •
A MOTORIST driving along Maasai Lodge Road towards
Ongata Rongai town in Kajiado County has told The NewsFlash that the lion encounter happened moments after he brietly stopped to drop off a friend - and decided to take a quick leak.
Mid-zip, a loud lion's growl shattered the calm. The man re-entered his car through the sunroof at record speed, abandoning the stop altogether. The lion later crossed the road and disappeared into nearby bush. No injuries were reported.
Whether new boxers were required is a secret he is likely to take to the grave.
The incident comes as the Kenya Wildlife Service (KWS) continues to track two lionesses that strayed from Nairobi National Park, warning residents to stay alert and report sightings.NEWS
ALERT
CLOSE CALL ON MAASAI LODGE ROAD IN KAJIADO:
LION INTERRUPTS PIT STOP
Read More on
@Samburu_Newsflash
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Angry People in Local Newspapers @apiln.bsky.social · 12h
This looks important.
Sunderland Echo

An opening date has been set for the grand opening of the North East's first Crocs outlet store.
Young Keanu Reeves saying “whoa”.
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Angry People in Local Newspapers @apiln.bsky.social · 12h
Remember the Sheringham bus shelter kerfuffle? Strangely, there’s no-one lying in front of the bulldozers for this classic piece of brutalist metal-and-tramps-piss roadside furniture.
greatyarmouthmercury.co.uk
Replacement of weathered bus shelter set to cause traffic delays
The bus shelter on the Beighton Road slip road in Acle will be replaced by workers over the next three days.
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Angry People in Local Newspapers @apiln.bsky.social · 12h
Pencil-necked desk jockeys at the council: “You know the signs outside your property criticising us for not granting you planning permission for urgent roof repairs?” Rich, angry owner: “I put them there on account of your pencil-necked desk jockeying” Council: “Well, they need planning permission”
henleystandard.co.uk
Remove signs criticising us, says planning authority
THE owner of an historic Henley home has been told to remove signs that criticise the planning authority.
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Angry People in Local Newspapers @apiln.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
At this resolution, that DOES NOT look like a boxing glove.
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Angry People in Local Newspapers @apiln.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
This is the proper use of a Freedom of Information request.
thestar.co.uk
This is how many times council has repainted ‘L’ on Pool Square street sign
Highways teams have attended Pool Square many times to repair the road sign due to a missing ‘L’
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Angry People in Local Newspapers @apiln.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
The Go Go Gunners do it again. Is there nothing the Arsenal cannot do?* *apart from beating Brighton. #NiceThings
devonlive.com
'Rubbish' Arsenal result led to life-saving Devon mud rescue
Alastair Cass from Chumleigh had walked outside following the football score when he heard a strange noise in the valley
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Angry People in Local Newspapers @apiln.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
“Worst day of my life,” said The Doctor.
dailystar.co.uk
Unlucky bloke swept away 'mid poo' as flash flood sends portaloo down street
An incredibly unlucky man was left trapped inside a portable toilet after it was swept away during a terrifying flash flood in Baranquilla, Colombia earlier this week
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Angry People in Local Newspapers @apiln.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
Advertise your new yoga business by tying a red balloon to a drain with a 'you'll float too' tagline. And it’s not even Derry, Maine.
newsobserver.com
Raleigh’s Falls Village shopping center will get a new business next year
The new business will join retailers like T.J. Maxx and HomeGoods in the shopping center by January.
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Angry People in Local Newspapers @apiln.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
PUBLIC SERVICE MESSAGE: This one is doing the rounds again, because everybody wants a glass of jizz at Christmas. We can confirm that it is genuine, and was posted, then rapidly deleted on 20 Sept 2022. Posts pretending to be from other clubs are just bandwagon-jumping fake sparkling spuff.
Twitter: Dundee United FC • @dundeeunitedfc
4 Christmas at Tannadice
Get into the festive spirit with the return of our Christmas party nights across December, priced at just £45pp
/ Glass of Jizz
•I Three-course Christmas dinner
Entertainment
Live DJ
Don't miss out
#UnitedInPursuit.
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Angry People in Local Newspapers @apiln.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
Right: 🔸Accident waiting to happen 🔸Think of the kiddiewinks 🔸Pencil-necked desk jockeys at the council 🔸Persimmon, the Pontins of housebuilding 🔸And a company called “Cocksedge” which is sexy slang all night long Have we missed anything?
suffolknews.co.uk
New primary school shuts after staff and governors declare the route to it unsafe
A primary school has been forced to close just weeks since it opened after staff and governors said the route to it was too dangerous for pupils.
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Angry People in Local Newspapers @apiln.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
It’s the legendary badger vs baboon rumble, except (and we’ve checked with experts) there are no wild baboons in Latvia.
eng.lsm.lv
Badger vs. hedgehog brawl results in police action in Aizpute, Latvia
On the night of Saturday, 26 September, the South Kurzeme District Municipal Police received an unusual call from Aizpute, where the residents of a block of flats had had their night’s sleep disturbed...
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Angry People in Local Newspapers @apiln.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
You, sir, are the most magnificent father. Go and have a nice sit down for a bit. #NiceThings
sunderlandecho.com
Sunderland dad's message after epic Scafell Pike challenge
‘I can’t put into words how much I appreciate all the support’
0242
Angry People in Local Newspapers @apiln.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
Oh Lordy, it’s another one of these. The answer is, of course: 1. Don’t If, however, you find yourself in Swindon, we recommend the following activities: 1. Leave immediately 2. No, faster than that
How to spend a day in Swindon the UK's best place to live for quality of life.
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Angry People in Local Newspapers @apiln.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
Councillor Lee demonstrates the advanced level projectile done a poo.
gazette-news.co.uk
‘Bombsite of potholes’ road finally resurfaced
A long-awaited resurfacing scheme has finally been completed on Rowhedge Road.
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Angry People in Local Newspapers @apiln.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
This isn’t just a ParkingBastard™️ fine, it’s an M&S ParkingBastard™️ fine.
manchestereveningnews.co.uk
Angry dad slapped with £170 fine in M&S visit after falling foul of strict rule
A Stockport dad fears others might not know they are falling foul of strict rules when going shopping
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Angry People in Local Newspapers @apiln.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
Local resident retired Captain Jean-Luc Picard said “THERE ARE FOUR LIGHTS”
henleystandard.co.uk
Upgraded traffic lights ‘block’ each other on busy road
CHANGES to the layout of traffic lights on a busy road have been criticised with one now facing the “wrong direction”.
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Angry People in Local Newspapers @apiln.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
The South African version of Location Location Location is absolutely wild.
'It's hard to sell a house when it's covered in baboon faeces: Cape Town divided over plan to remove its monkeys.
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Reposted by Angry People in Local Newspapers
Neil Norman And His Cosmic Orchestra @fubsyshabaroon.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
Counterpoint: Fuck right off.
Oxford station's Platform 5 'should be renamed Platform 9¾'
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Angry People in Local Newspapers @apiln.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
Our first “pencil-necked AI jockeys at the council” story. Welcome to the crappy new world.
nine.com.au
‘It’s clearly the windscreen wiper’: Ex-lawyer fights seatbelt fine | Nine.com.au
Angry NSW motorists are fighting a flood of AI seatbelt fines, claiming blurry and indecipherable camera photos fail to prove any wrongdoing.
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Angry People in Local Newspapers @apiln.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
This is what those Facebook nostalgia pages mean when they say “We drank from the hosepipe and survived”. This poor sod didn’t.
Surrey burst water man spilling 750 litres per second with thousands impacted.
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Angry People in Local Newspapers @apiln.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
It is day 108 of Judith’s holiday compo protest outside TUI in Leeds, and she could probably keep this going until the heat death of the universe.
leeds-live.co.uk
'Angry' Leeds gran protesting outside TUI office after 'dirty' £3k holiday
'I’m an angry Yorkshire woman who will continue to do this'
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Angry People in Local Newspapers @apiln.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
Would this, by chance, be an accident waiting to happen?
blackpoolgazette.co.uk
Safety fears over seafront crossings which are key part of £1.6m road upgrade scheme
“With the new one-way system on that stretch of St Annes Road West, vehicles will still be emerging at that corner and the crossing is too close”
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Angry People in Local Newspapers @apiln.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
LibDem doing LibDem things
bbc.co.uk
Sunderland Council urged to declare 'pothole emergency'
Sunderland Council says staff have fixed more potholes so far this year than in the entirety of 2025.
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Angry People in Local Newspapers @apiln.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
We have identified a suspect, known locally as “Onion Johnny” www.eadt.co.uk/news/2658634...
Driver hit by red onion thrown through window by group of boys on bikes. A French onion seller.
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Angry People in Local Newspapers @apiln.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
Butmycar Maximus!
watfordobserver.co.uk
Residents fear 'gridlock' as 'Harry Potter filming' to close village centre
Latimer reighbours fear HBO Harry Potter filming will leave them stranded as it is set to block their village’s roads.
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Angry People in Local Newspapers @apiln.bsky.social · 28/09/2026
Wanna feel old? This is what Take That look like today. www.bbc.co.uk/news/article...
bbc.co.uk
Utility firms under fire over Ormskirk pavement repairs
Residents say streets have been left with temporary-looking repairs instead of matching stone flags.
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Angry People in Local Newspapers @apiln.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
INCORRECT. IT’S BASIC TAXONOMY WILLIAM.
WILLIAM SITWELL
Small dog owners should realise their
'dogs' are actually cats.
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Angry People in Local Newspapers @apiln.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
Good lad James. Little guy with a big heart. #NiceThings
countydownspectator.co.uk
Bangor boy taking big steps to raise funds for cancer charity - County Down Spectator
By Lesley Walsh A YOUNG Bangor boy with a huge heart has been stepping out to raise funds for a cancer charity that’s very dear to him. Little James Barker may be only ten years old but he has been do...
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Angry People in Local Newspapers @apiln.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
Phwooooar
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Angry People in Local Newspapers @apiln.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
Eighteen years old, going on sixty. Tough paper round.
hartlepoolmail.co.uk
'Someone used my car for target practice after taking it to the garage'
A young Hartlepool driver was dismayed to find his first car covered in bullet-like holes and damage.
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Angry People in Local Newspapers @apiln.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
It’s far too early to speculate what’s going on down there, but it’s obviously posh kids, a dog, and lashings of ginger beer.
Five arrested for alleged terrorism offences after
'major incident' near RAF
Fairford.
1938759
Angry People in Local Newspapers @apiln.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
Actual goosebumps #NiceThings
bbc.co.uk
Child's letter found under stairs in Hockley home after 44 years
Michelle Harwood had not been born when the letter was written and did not expect to find the writer.
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Angry People in Local Newspapers @apiln.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
SEXY SLANG ADJUDICATION: This will be in the next edition of the Viz Profanisaurus, you mark our words.
FARMERS
WEEKLY

Farmer Focus: Pig tent flaps are up and down like a yo-yo
William de Feyter
16 September 2026
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Angry People in Local Newspapers @apiln.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
1. Go to Burscough in West Lancashire. 2. Spend the day there. You’re welcome.
St Helens Star: How to spend a day in Burscough in West
Lancashire.
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Angry People in Local Newspapers @apiln.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
🎵 Can I play with Madras? 🎶
metro.co.uk
Iron Maiden star baffles fans by hosting local curry night at Welsh holiday park
'Well, there's a headline I never thought I'd read.'
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Angry People in Local Newspapers @apiln.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
Accident Waiting To Happen KLAXON
portsmouth.co.uk
'An accident waiting to happen' - Residents' anger at parking charge changes
‘It is an accident waiting to happen’
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Angry People in Local Newspapers @apiln.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
The Sydney Morning Herald with its finger on the pulse of the nation. Won’t anybody think of the Geoffries?
SMH: Geoffrey's au pair was meant to arrive three weeks ago.
He's still waiting.
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Angry People in Local Newspapers @apiln.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
I agree. They should just sell chicken and chicken-related products from wallpaper pasting tables at the side of the road.
stroudnewsandjournal.co.uk
Stroud figures say new KFC ‘should not be built’ and would increase congestion
THE IMMINENT arrival of KFC to the town has sparked a fresh debate over health, traffic, and environmental concerns.
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Reposted by Angry People in Local Newspapers
Alistair Coleman @alistaircoleman.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
Happy 12th anniversary to this immensely important editorial in Britain’s newspaper of record, the [checks notes] Sunday Sport.
Editorial in the Sunday Sport: 

SUNDAY Sport likes to remain above the squabbles and spats which often divide our tired old
Fleet Street rivals.
We serve our readers, not the petty rivalries of editors or proprietors.
But we are today forced to join a debate after our very integrity was questioned by The Guardian.
And the heated issue is the spelling
of the word "BELLEND".
This left-wing,
loss-making house
journal of Britain's chattering classes recently updated its style guide - the manual which tells its journalists how to spell certain oft-misspelt words.
In defiance of common sense and common decency Guardian bigwigs have decreed their galley slaves spell out bellend as "bell-end"
They
may find
this bohemian
departure from orthodoxy "challenging" but it is a direct assault on the English language.
Do not forget, the teachers of Britain suckle at the teat of The Guardian like hungry puppies.
This misspelling of bellend will be forced into the easily-moulded minds of our nation's schoolchildren.
The
Guardian.
Wrong about everything. Always.
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Angry People in Local Newspapers @apiln.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
Places which are probably quite a bit like Beirut - Nelson in Lancashire
lancs.live
'We get woken at midnight by fireworks most nights - it's like living in Beirut'
Rules govern when and where fireworks can be set off
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Angry People in Local Newspapers @apiln.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
We haven’t had one of these in ages. Oh. Mate.
yorkmix.com
Firefighters rescue teenager stuck in baby seat in York park
 
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Angry People in Local Newspapers @apiln.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
Look at them with their poles out
herefordtimes.com
Anglers 'dismayed and betrayed' over river Wye pollution plan
Anglers say they feel “dismayed and betrayed” over the latest plans to tackle pollution in the River Wye.
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Angry People in Local Newspapers @apiln.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
What the what now?!
wsfp.co.uk
Minehead funeral director with a role in Dot Cotton’s farewell
A Minehead funeral director whose 25-year career has taken him from horse-drawn funerals to the sets of Bridgerton and The Crown has gained a Diploma in Funeral Directing.
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Angry People in Local Newspapers @apiln.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
This looks important.
dailyecho.co.uk
Southampton diner devours 80 meatballs at IKEA mega-feast
An unlimited meatball buffet held at IKEA last night saw one man consume 80 iconic meaty morsels, while another family managed over 400.
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Angry People in Local Newspapers @apiln.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
Just your everyday tale of farming folk [checks notes] Just your everyday tale of barking mad gangland feuds.
metro.co.uk
Man rammed a tractor into home 'after graves of relatives desecrated'
The home 'essentially had to be rebuilt' while a farmer of the stolen tractor was left thousands of pounds out of pocket.
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