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les swimming poules!

@angryonabus.bsky.social
83 followers 49 following 556 posts

another iteration of the nonsense artist sometimes known as etben. they/them, late 30s. usually in Boston, but sometimes I go to the woods to Live Ridiculously

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les swimming poules! @angryonabus.bsky.social · 04/09/2026
…well, that’s fair.
The results of a dialect quiz, saying that I talk like someone from northern MI or MN.
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les swimming poules! @angryonabus.bsky.social · 25/08/2026
I have been forgiven for leaving for six weeks! …unclear if I will be forgiven for filming this moment of indignity.
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les swimming poules! @angryonabus.bsky.social · 21/08/2026
I have always hated zebra mussels, but today I spent two hours scrubbing them off of various waterfront stuff, and now…I REALLY hate zebra mussels.
A pole encrusted with zebra mussels
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les swimming poules! @angryonabus.bsky.social · 14/08/2026
Without downloading any new pics, where are you mentally?
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les swimming poules! @angryonabus.bsky.social · 04/07/2026
Appeasing The Sister
Bellara, a brown tabby, lays on the floor with her head on her paws. Josephine, a tortoiseshell roughly half Bellara’s size, perches on an armchair with an aura of impending doom.
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les swimming poules! @angryonabus.bsky.social · 02/07/2026
It is SIX IN THE GODDAMN MORNING.
Temperature gauge showing a temp of 78° (feels like 83°). Forecast high temp: 101°
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les swimming poules! @angryonabus.bsky.social · 30/06/2026
It took me a minute to figure out what was going on here. Bless your heart, Boston.
A voicemail transcript in which, due to the speaker’s Boston accent, the phrase ‘Mayor Michelle Wu’ has been transcribed as ‘Mamma Shabu’
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les swimming poules! @angryonabus.bsky.social · 30/06/2026
Skeptic, right on the edge of Conscientious Objector. Yeah, that tracks.
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les swimming poules! @angryonabus.bsky.social · 18/06/2026
A deeply unserious creature.
The back half of a brown tabby who appears to have fallen off of the bed and then just…stayed there.
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les swimming poules! @angryonabus.bsky.social · 19/05/2026
Intrepid Cat Scientist: 0 Sheet of Transparent Plastic: 1
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les swimming poules! @angryonabus.bsky.social · 17/05/2026
Ma’am, what ARE you? More to the point, what is your SPINE?
A gray tabby, sprawled in her cat tree in a way that cannot POSSIBLY be comfortable.
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les swimming poules! @angryonabus.bsky.social · 30/04/2026
@rayoflight.bsky.social has cracked the code:
Text messages: 

😂 omg it only just occurred to me that she doesn't think it's your thing bc it's about Men

…omg you’re right
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les swimming poules! @angryonabus.bsky.social · 28/02/2026
“Ma’am, are you aware that you appear to have been assembled incorrectly?”
A gray tabby lying down. Her front and back legs are pointing in completely different directions.
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les swimming poules! @angryonabus.bsky.social · 23/02/2026
Error 404: Outside Not Found
View of a window from inside. There is so much snow outside that you cannot see anything but a white square.
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les swimming poules! @angryonabus.bsky.social · 18/02/2026
This is a CAT checkpoint. Show me the most recent cat image on your phone.
A grey tabby sitting with front paws stretched out.
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les swimming poules! @angryonabus.bsky.social · 04/02/2026
no new pictures where are you at mentally
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les swimming poules! @angryonabus.bsky.social · 02/01/2026
The Crimes Continue
A coat rack and a cabinet. In the back, you can just barely see a gray tabby poking her head out from the top shelf of the pantry.
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les swimming poules! @angryonabus.bsky.social · 01/01/2026
A criminal at work.
Picture of a pantry. There is a gray tabby on the top shelf, where she is absolutely not supposed to be.
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les swimming poules! @angryonabus.bsky.social · 28/10/2025
20 seconds of aggressively purring Bellara for you this morning.
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les swimming poules! @angryonabus.bsky.social · 27/10/2025
The problem with going in to sit with the prisoner while I eat breakfast: she sat down in my lap and is having herself a little snoozle and oh my gosh she’s PURRING, what do you mean, I can’t possibly MOVE her!
A gray tabby, sleeping on my lap, her chin pillowed on her paws.
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les swimming poules! @angryonabus.bsky.social · 27/10/2025
“Escape from solitary confinement? Me? Never!*” * 10 minutes ago
A gray tabby, curled up peacefully on a quilt, looking not at all like a recently-escaped prisoner.
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les swimming poules! @angryonabus.bsky.social · 26/10/2025
But the prisoner was in good spirits, particularly once she had managed to subdue her captor.
Gray tabby, curled up on my stomach for a bath, sticking out one hind leg reallllll far.
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les swimming poules! @angryonabus.bsky.social · 26/10/2025
Bellara update: woke up this morning to discover that @rayoflight.bsky.social had implemented a Contraption in order to keep her from breaking out of solitary confinement.
Two doors, one closed. There is a bathrobe tie looped around the knobs such that the closed door cannot be opened.
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les swimming poules! @angryonabus.bsky.social · 26/10/2025
Hello and welcome to Miss Bellara Maevaris Reneben, our new Junior Statescat! Hobbies include being so so so long, looking alarmed, and purring ferociously.
A gray tabby cat looking alarmedA gray tabby cat sitting in a lap, looking startled.A gray tabby cat on a bed, looking concernedA gray tabby cat emerging from under a bed, looking dubious.
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les swimming poules! @angryonabus.bsky.social · 07/10/2025
RIP to the Lady Sif, Elder Statescat of the Reneben household, our Halloween void-beast who snuck into our basement and our hearts. You were a great cat - terrible at absolutely everything else, but great at Cat. We’ll miss you, beastie.
A small black cat sitting on a stack of student work.A small black cat, curled up in a ball.A small black car sprawled across a coffee table, sticking one leg outa small black cat hiding behind a door, looking betrayed
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les swimming poules! @angryonabus.bsky.social · 24/09/2025
Makes me laugh every time I see it.
A sticker that says “greatness - heroism - class”, but with specific letters bolded so that it also says “eat her ass”.
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les swimming poules! @angryonabus.bsky.social · 12/07/2025
No THANK you!
Air quality index showing that the air quality for both today and tomorrow is in the ‘very unhealthy’ category
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les swimming poules! @angryonabus.bsky.social · 01/06/2025
By age 35, you should have at least one friend you can text when your grocery store reorganizes the produce section unexpectedly.
Screenshot of a text conversation about my grocery store reorganizing the produce section. Concludes with the sentence, “I don’t necessarily disagree with their choices, but I do feel QUITE strongly that we should have been consulted.”
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les swimming poules! @angryonabus.bsky.social · 14/04/2025
What a great day to be at work until 8:30 or later! 🙃 …I will say that it is VERY nice to see the sun again after, what, a week and a half of rain?
A screenshot of the Fitbit app, which estimates that I got a little less than 4 hours of sleep last night.
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les swimming poules! @angryonabus.bsky.social · 17/03/2025
I keep feeling like that “no fears / one fear” meme, except that I actually had quite a few fears already, so it’s more like this:
The “no fears / one fear” meme, rewritten to be “n fears / n+1 fears”
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les swimming poules! @angryonabus.bsky.social · 09/02/2025
Message to all bitches: please survive
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les swimming poules! @angryonabus.bsky.social · 12/01/2025
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les swimming poules! @angryonabus.bsky.social · 11/01/2025
She is being SO brave!! By which I mean that she let a Man perceive her - a Standing Man, even! - from only half a room away.
A picture of a small black cat sitting on a bed looking extremely dubious.
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les swimming poules! @angryonabus.bsky.social · 28/12/2024
without downloading any new pics, what’s your energy going into 2025
A small dog standing next to a sign that says PLEASE ASK SOMEONE ELSE
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les swimming poules! @angryonabus.bsky.social · 26/12/2024
What I’m saying is, the impulse to print this post out and give it to every single member of my family is EXTREMELY strong.
Tweet that says: it’s crazy how if you get good grades they just let you raw dog adhd your whole life.
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les swimming poules! @angryonabus.bsky.social · 24/12/2024
My parents’ dog is a Good Boy, even if he does have the eyes of a haunted Victorian orphan.
Picture of a golden doodle staring soulfully at the camera.
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les swimming poules! @angryonabus.bsky.social · 18/12/2024
This is the third or fourth time I’ve gotten a call from someone else’s urologist… part of me wonders if it’s a scam, but I can’t figure out how that would work. 🧐
Transcript from a voicemail reminding someone (not me!) about their vasectomy appointment
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les swimming poules! @angryonabus.bsky.social · 10/12/2024
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les swimming poules! @angryonabus.bsky.social · 04/12/2024
…yeah, that tracks
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les swimming poules! @angryonabus.bsky.social · 28/11/2024
do we do #wipwednesday over here? fuck it, i'm writing again for the first time in a hot minute, AND i remembered it was wednesday, we're doing this. veilguard, probably neve/lucanis eventually. working title: coffee shop non-AU
There's a new guy working at Neve's favorite coffee shop.

"Right, okay." Varric has to brace himself against the leg of the table in order to be able to lean his chair back; he manages with only a little wobbling. "And, just to be clear, that's—bad?"

"It's annoying, is what it is." Neve scowls at her coffee. "He keeps messing with the menu."

Varric takes a drink of his own coffee and raises his eyebrows in pleased surprise. "You know, I'm not normally one for coffee, but this isn't half bad."

"I know."  Neve tastes her own coffee: rich, smooth, notes of spice and smoke. "That's the problem."

"...yeah, I'm going to need a little more to go on, Gallus."
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les swimming poules! @angryonabus.bsky.social · 27/11/2024
show me a picture on your phone that has your energy that isn’t a selfie
A photo of a traffic light with both the red and the green lights lit up.
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les swimming poules! @angryonabus.bsky.social · 01/11/2024
Oh, we’re SO back.
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les swimming poules! @angryonabus.bsky.social · 30/10/2024
#BG3Problems: “Oh, I could climb those!”
A picture of vines on a chain link fence. The vines resemble the climbable vines from Baldur’s Gate 3.
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les swimming poules! @angryonabus.bsky.social · 19/09/2024
A pale silhouette on the beach. Bottom text: WAAAHHHGOOOOOBHHN
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les swimming poules! @angryonabus.bsky.social · 27/05/2024
A bag of Dunkin Donuts Iced Coffee Flavored Jelly Beans
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les swimming poules! @angryonabus.bsky.social · 10/03/2024
Locals, FYI, these cookies are (apart from being square) basically indistinguishable from Thin Mints.
A package of Market Basket “Fudge Mint Cookie Squares”
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les swimming poules! @angryonabus.bsky.social · 20/02/2024
Surprise power outage means board game night!
A table with a mechanical lantern, a candle, and a pile of board games.
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les swimming poules! @angryonabus.bsky.social · 10/02/2024
Unrestrained February fun chez Reneben
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les swimming poules! @angryonabus.bsky.social · 13/11/2023
…so I’m going to quit this sphere of existence, thanks, cool, byeeeee.
An automatically generated Spotify playlist with the title “goblincore otherkin Monday early morning”
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les swimming poules! @angryonabus.bsky.social · 10/11/2023
“No, I can’t get up…the cats have cast Hold Person.”
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