iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

Andy Beckerman @andybeckerman.bsky.social · 13h

Have we all entered the blue box from Mulholland Drive? Has the Black Lodge emptied out into our world?

A woman in the Oval Office who has had so much plastic surgery that she looks like an animatronic wraith

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Andy Beckerman @andybeckerman.bsky.social · 06/10/2026

I don't know what's up Randy Newman's butt, but his "Short People" update is really insane

a VERY REAL and TOTALLY NOT PHOTOSHOPPED screencap from Genius of the first verse of "Short People '26" with the following lyrics:
Short people, we gotta end
Short people, we gotta end
Short people, we gotta end the scourge

Remove their bones, toss ‘em in the sewer
Jam their flesh on a great big skewer
They’re a handcuff on human evolution
It may not be final, but I’ve got a solution

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Andy Beckerman @andybeckerman.bsky.social · 02/10/2026

Some distraction from dystopia with a brand-new episode of Beginnings... A masterclass on the emotions & business of comics by the great @evandorkin.bsky.social! The “dangerous” 1970s NYC, becoming fearful, feeling like a screw-up, not wanting to be perceived + MORE! 🎧 tinyurl.com/BeginningsDo...

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Andy Beckerman @andybeckerman.bsky.social · 28/09/2026

Apologies, but it's one of those things I had to make in order to stop my brain from continually thinking it

a VERY REAL and TOTALLY NOT PHOTOSHOPPED old Penguin Modern Classics edition of R.E.M. Forster's Howards End of the World As We Know It (And I Feel Fine)

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Andy Beckerman @andybeckerman.bsky.social · 25/09/2026

Some distraction from dystopia with a brand-new episode of Beginnings... Great talk with @hutchharris.bsky.social of The Thermals! Growing up in Silicon Valley, industrial musicals, the reality of making music for a living, acting camp + MORE! 🎧 tinyurl.com/BeginningsHu...

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Andy Beckerman @andybeckerman.bsky.social · 21/09/2026

Maybe we should have taken Rob Bonta's fundraising e-mails at face value, and we wouldn't have been surprised at him allowing the merger to go through

a VERY REAL and TOTALLY NOT PHOTOSHOPPED screencap of a fundraising e-mail from Attorney General Rob Bonta that reads:

Andrew, I am working hard to protect you and Entertainment jobs from unnecessary and illegal mergers.

Can I count on you to chip in and help me with this battle?

Will I fold the moment the fight gets even slightly difficult? Will I make sure that all the writers, actors and craftspeople working in the Entertainment industry get no meaningful or material concessions from the, I repeat, illegal merger? Will I continually ask for money and then betray you in a way that makes Judas Iscariot look like Odysseus?

You bet your sweet bippy, I will!

Eat my ass and give me your money! You have no other option! It’s either business fascists or murder fascists, fucko! Pick one!

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Andy Beckerman @andybeckerman.bsky.social · 20/09/2026

He's ready to vote on the "Monkeys Hosting 1950s Dance Show" Act

A picture of Mitch McConnell showing what's going on in his head these days. And it's a monkey dressed in a polka dot suit on a 1950s dance show.

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Andy Beckerman @andybeckerman.bsky.social · 19/09/2026

FCC lets Paramount sell 49.5% equity stake to Saudi Arabia and two hours later, this is announced:

a VERY REAL and TOTALLY NOT PHOTOSHOPPED ad for the Comedy Central/Riyadh Comedy Festival Roast of Mohammed Bin Salman.

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Andy Beckerman @andybeckerman.bsky.social · 19/09/2026

I hope this isn’t why the FBI dropped the beastiality disqualification

A tweet about how Shaq was just named an honorary FBI agent by Kash Patel

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Andy Beckerman @andybeckerman.bsky.social · 19/09/2026

They’re in a surveillance room like the one from Sliver, but it’s all just dog butts and uncollected feces

A still from the movie Sliver showing a room filled with monitors

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Andy Beckerman @andybeckerman.bsky.social · 18/09/2026

Some distraction from dystopia with a brand-new episode of Beginnings... Great talk with Lira and Caufield of Sweeping Promises! Making art under fascism, academia, labor consciousness, existential naivete and MORE! 🎧 tinyurl.com/BeginningsSP...

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Andy Beckerman @andybeckerman.bsky.social · 16/09/2026

Hold on, the fundamentally defective technology that is poised to destroy the economy, costs exponentially more than it makes, uses so much water it leaves whole counties withered, taxes the electrical grid beyond capacity & literally poisons every community that hosts a data center is DANGEROUS?!?!

A still from CNN of two idiots talking about how AI could "kill us all by the end of the decade"

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Andy Beckerman @andybeckerman.bsky.social · 14/09/2026

Today's the day I submit my proposal for a monument memorializing the victims of American violence. It is a giant piss-filled cube containing the corpses of war criminals like Dick Cheney. Hope Congress approves of it!

A picture of the National Mall with plans for a giant piss-filled cube containing the bodies of Dick Cheney, Henry Kissinger and other American mass murderers.

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Andy Beckerman @andybeckerman.bsky.social · 11/09/2026

Some distraction from dystopia with a brand-new episode of Beginnings... Thoughtful times with the wonderful David Rees, creator of Get Your War On! The performative self, not planning ahead existentially, sitting in silence, SST Records + MORE! 🎧 tinyurl.com/BeginningsDR...

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Andy Beckerman @andybeckerman.bsky.social · 10/09/2026

Comedy Central just started to make clips of old stand-up... what the heck was going on in the 1980s?

a TOTALLY REAL and VERY NOT PHOTOSHOPPED clip of Seinfeld talking about how bad airline food is... because the capybara steaks are just capybara gristle.

a TOTALLY REAL and VERY NOT PHOTOSHOPPED clip of Martin Lawrence talking about how women like to shop... for taxidermied capybaras

a TOTALLY REAL and VERY NOT PHOTOSHOPPED clip of Rodney Dangerfield saying how he gets now respect... unlike some large semiaquatic South American rodents

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Andy Beckerman @andybeckerman.bsky.social · 09/09/2026

Everyone’s praising Robert Pattinson’s performance in this, but I’ll be honest, he neither looks nor sounds like Jiminy Glick

The poster for the new Robert Pattinson films Primetime. It’s just Robby from the clavicle up looking intensely with all the movie info at the bottom

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Andy Beckerman @andybeckerman.bsky.social · 04/09/2026

•They met on the set of Tot-Skull Rec-Hell •Arnold was his only support after CK’s acrimonius divorce from Joyce DeWitt •CK was the death doula for Arnold’s donkey Chris •💐Hollywood friendships come and go, but TRUE FRIENDSHIPS endure forever💐 •Ghouls and weightlifters *can* be friends!

The Cryptkeeper and Arnold Schwarzenegger hanging out

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Andy Beckerman @andybeckerman.bsky.social · 04/09/2026

Some distraction from dystopia with a brand-new episode of Beginnings... Wonderful talk with Elisabeth Esselink AKA Solex! WWII-era Indonesian internment camps, art as therapy, aesthetic pessimism, a sheltered childhood and MORE! 🎧 tinyurl.com/BeginningsSo...

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Andy Beckerman @andybeckerman.bsky.social · 28/08/2026

Some distraction from dystopia with a brand-new episode of Beginnings... Great talk with Elanor Moss! Navigating the UK class structures, authenticity vs. integrity, being vulnerable in public, songwriting as a character + MORE! 🎧 tinyurl.com/BeginningsEM...

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Andy Beckerman @andybeckerman.bsky.social · 21/08/2026

Some distraction from dystopia with a brand-new episode of Beginnings... The delightful Dan Friel stops by to talk hippie philosophies & corporate trust, the wonder of the universe, Is the political project of art a failure?, “Weird” Al + MORE! 🎧 tinyurl.com/BeginningsFr...

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Andy Beckerman @andybeckerman.bsky.social · 21/08/2026

Another notice from the FDA... Is there anything *not* being recalled right now?

a TOTALLY REAL and VERY NOT PHOTOSHOPPED FDA recall notice for Golden Bounty Human Piss in the two-liter "Piss Buddy" jug, which has two spouts so two people can drink at the same time.

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Andy Beckerman @andybeckerman.bsky.social · 14/08/2026

Some distraction from dystopia with a brand-new episode of Beginnings... Great talk with screenwriter @josholson.bsky.social! Radically left West Philly neighborhoods, starting your career with a real-life Hollywood farce, working with Harlan Ellison + MORE! 🎧 tinyurl.com/BeginningsJO...

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Andy Beckerman @andybeckerman.bsky.social · 13/08/2026

Reworked "Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs" for the 1%

A Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs for the uber-wealthy. The top of the pyramid says "Pedophile island". You ca guess what the rest is.

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Andy Beckerman @andybeckerman.bsky.social · 07/08/2026

Some distraction from dystopia with a brand-new episode of Beginnings... Great talk with producer and musician @blockheadnyc.bsky.social! Giuliani’s New York, "melee awareness", playing tennis with Kurt Vonnegut, fine art & making beats + MORE! 🎧 tinyurl.com/BeginningsBl...

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Andy Beckerman @andybeckerman.bsky.social · 05/08/2026

Why did they buy this from Ricky Gervais if this is what they thought of it?

a VERY REAL and TOTALLY NOT PHOTOSHOPPED picture of Netflix's description of Ricky Gervais' new animated show Alley Cats. It reads "Ill-humor abounds, as noted "funnyman" Ricky Gervais, whose best work is so far behind him that you can measure it in "epochs" and "eons", does his lifeless, lethargic thing with a bunch of mangy, unrelatable cats. You can expect upwards of 180 butthole jokes per episode."

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Andy Beckerman @andybeckerman.bsky.social · 31/07/2026

Some distraction from dystopia with a brand-new episode of Beginnings... Great talk w/Chad Matheny AKA @emperorx.bsky.social! The church observatory, moral realism vs. an ethical spectrum, faith & fear, aesthetic emergencies & recording an album in a warzone + MORE! 🎧 tinyurl.com/BeginningsEm...

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Andy Beckerman @andybeckerman.bsky.social · 29/07/2026

I guess rebranding was the cheaper option?

a VERY REAL and TOTALLY NOT PHOTOSHOPPED picture of a bag of Taylor Farms' Cyclospora Fecal Parasites. It looks like lettuce, but it's really just full of diarrhea bugs.

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Andy Beckerman @andybeckerman.bsky.social · 28/07/2026

Hold on, you’re telling me the US gestapo - made up primarily of violent domestic abusers - that in their official capacity rounding up innocent people to send to concentration camps, these otherwise unquestionable paragons used *racial slurs*?? These— Ow, fuck shit I just pulled my sarcasm muscle.

A screencap of the LA Times article about how ICE used slurs in their text messages… quel suprise

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Andy Beckerman @andybeckerman.bsky.social · 27/07/2026

Now that Taco Bell is no longer getting diarrhea lettuce from Taylor Farms, I'm VERY excited for their new promotion!

a VERY REAL and TOTALLY NOT PHOTOSHOPPED Taco Bell ad for a collab with an AI Elaine Stritch called "Ladies Who Crunch"

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Andy Beckerman @andybeckerman.bsky.social · 24/07/2026

Some distraction from dystopia with a brand-new episode of Beginnings... Good times with American Prestige's @dbessner.bsky.social! The decline of Hollywood and, in general, society; calm dads; ambition & death; the historical contingencies of Nirvana + MORE! 🎧 tinyurl.com/BeginningsBe...

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Andy Beckerman @andybeckerman.bsky.social · 17/07/2026

Some distraction from dystopia with a brand-new episode of Beginnings... Good times with Matthew S., founder of Illegal Art! Fresno: carjacking capital of the US; Mormonism, community and hierarchy; having a calling; artistic sampling vs. tech thievery + MORE! 🎧 tinyurl.com/BeginningsMy...

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Andy Beckerman @andybeckerman.bsky.social · 16/07/2026

Man, the propaganda is starting to get THICK

a VERY REAL, and TOTALLY NOT PHOTOSHOPPED poster from the EPA about how you must conserve water because that water belongs to data centers!

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Andy Beckerman @andybeckerman.bsky.social · 10/07/2026

Some distraction from dystopia with a brand-new episode of Beginnings... Great talk with @jonathanmeiburg.bsky.social of @shearwaterband.bsky.social! Aesthetic randomness, Song of Myself, the wonder of the universe, existential lessons from world travel and MORE! 🎧 tinyurl.com/BeginningsSh...

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Andy Beckerman @andybeckerman.bsky.social · 10/07/2026

I was kidding with Naomi and said there are as many comedies about golf on TV as there are comedies with majority black casts, but then I looked it up and that's actually true and soon there will be more shows about golf on TV than comedies with majority black casts.

A screencap of a headline from the AV Club about how Netflix is greenlighting yet another show about golf

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Andy Beckerman @andybeckerman.bsky.social · 09/07/2026

From the original cut of Back to the Future, when Marty McFly was going to be into indie rock

Marty McFly talking to the band at the Under the Sea dance. The subtitle reads, "Alright guys, this is a Pavement song... “Silence Kid” or maybe “Kit”? Anyway, there’s an intro, then, uh, I guess two verses and then a... a something. Also, the tuning is DADABE, but that’s just one guitar, and the other... you know what? Let’s just do a Chuck Berry song."

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Andy Beckerman @andybeckerman.bsky.social · 04/07/2026

THANK YOU FOR NAILING PEOPLE WHO SAY “It’s a beautiful day” TO THE CROSS! It’s 100% worth allowing an unrepentant sex predator back into showbiz because *this* is a one-of-a-kind POV! Sorry to all the women in comedy but your safety means nothing when compared to unique takes from crumpled perverts!

A still from unrepentant sexual predator Louis CK’s shitty new special

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Andy Beckerman @andybeckerman.bsky.social · 30/06/2026

Finally completed my set of Michael Clayton trading cards!

a VERY REAL and TOTALLY NOT PHOTOSHOPPED Michael Clayton trading card featuring the scene where Arthur Eden is holding 30 baguettes. The card says "YOU THINK YOU GOT THE HORSE FOR THAT?" at the bottom

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Andy Beckerman @andybeckerman.bsky.social · 26/06/2026

Jeni's got some good summer flavors

a VERY REAL and TOTALLY NOT PHOTOSHOPPED picture of Jeni's new summer flavors: My Parents' Shredded Divorce Papers, Pecan-Crusted Cloned Hitler Bones and White Chocolate Covid

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Andy Beckerman @andybeckerman.bsky.social · 22/06/2026

Karen Bass has responded to my video:

a VERY REAL tweet from LA Mayor Karen Bass, that is totally *not* photoshopped and which reads, "Al Qaeda and/or the far-Left have infiltrated the canine population, which is why I have empowered the police to murder as many dogs as possible. And do you also know what Al Qaeda and/or the far-Left need to live? Breathable air, which is why I have empowered chemical fires to burn indefinitely, turning the skies into poison. Bass out!"

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Andy Beckerman @andybeckerman.bsky.social · 22/06/2026

To figure out why the toxic warehouse fire has been taking so long to get under control, I looked at the LA city budget for answers…

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Andy Beckerman @andybeckerman.bsky.social · 19/06/2026

Hollywood over the last few years after it realized it no longer had to even pay lip service to diversity

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Andy Beckerman @andybeckerman.bsky.social · 17/06/2026

*Louis CK’s dad as they’re taking him into the assisted living facility* “And there are *fewer* unrepentant sexual predators here, correct?”

A still from unrepentant sexual predator Louis CK’s new Netflix special

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Andy Beckerman @andybeckerman.bsky.social · 14/06/2026

When I contemplate Our Collective Hell™, I remember the statistic that half of America is functionally illiterate, and it acts as a kind of spiritual gabapentin to calm my weary soul

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Andy Beckerman @andybeckerman.bsky.social · 14/06/2026

From the episode where ALF dressed up like a 14-year-old girl

An actual screencap from ALF season 4 episode 14 or somewhere around there. ALF had a dream where he became a famous comedian and after his career imploded, then ended up mopping up puke at some shitty Catskills nightclub. Anyway, he says, “Well, at least Woody Allen liked me.”

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Andy Beckerman @andybeckerman.bsky.social · 13/06/2026

The look Mabel gave me when she figured out we were en route to the vet

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