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Andrew Nicholls

@andrewjn.bsky.social
1.6K followers 246 following 131 posts

writer, mostly. Over 100 TV series, and the book Comedy Writer.

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Andrew Nicholls @andrewjn.bsky.social · 02/06/2026
If you’re an optometrist, do you see your glasses as half full?
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Andrew Nicholls @andrewjn.bsky.social · 20/03/2026
Benedict Hey Arnold.
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Andrew Nicholls @andrewjn.bsky.social · 31/12/2025
My 2025 output: a (humorous) poem about a (serious) documentary about a film about an idiot. www.amazon.com/MAN-GOD-Fitz...
amazon.com
AS MAN IS TO GOD: A Poem on the Making of Werner Herzog's "Fitzcarraldo" (Slow Lightning Lit Publications)
AS MAN IS TO GOD: A Poem on the Making of Werner Herzog's Fitzcarraldo (Slow Lightning Lit Publications) [Nicholls, Andrew] on Amazon.com. *FREE* shipping on qualifying offers. AS MAN IS TO GOD: A Poem on the Making of Werner Herzog's Fitzcarraldo (Slow Lightning Lit Publications)
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Andrew Nicholls @andrewjn.bsky.social · 16/12/2025
It was the most of times.
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Andrew Nicholls @andrewjn.bsky.social · 20/11/2025
Sophocracy: rule by the worst people you knew in high school.
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Andrew Nicholls @andrewjn.bsky.social · 16/11/2025
Okay, Frankenstein, but directed by Parker and Stone, and it’s John Fetterman
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Andrew Nicholls @andrewjn.bsky.social · 08/11/2025
Rossiter was a comic genius.
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Andrew Nicholls @andrewjn.bsky.social · 07/11/2025
($1T = over $35,700 for every minute he’s been alive)
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Andrew Nicholls @andrewjn.bsky.social · 07/11/2025
If stupid was glue, Tuberville could wallpaper New Zealand.
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Andrew Nicholls @andrewjn.bsky.social · 24/10/2025
Woman I know once told me “I never read books. I use… quantum learning.”
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Andrew Nicholls @andrewjn.bsky.social · 23/10/2025
Flying my underwear at half mast.
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Reposted by Andrew Nicholls
Chris Kluwe, adjudicated poaster @chriswarcraft.bsky.social · 21/10/2025
I mean, this is just flat out corruption. It’s blatantly obvious. He’s stealing our tax dollars.
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Andrew Nicholls @andrewjn.bsky.social · 16/10/2025
Who knows what evil lurks on the porches of men?
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Andrew Nicholls @andrewjn.bsky.social · 04/10/2025
Medical school plans to offer degree in Looking Shit Up On Internet.
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Andrew Nicholls @andrewjn.bsky.social · 02/10/2025
Walkergate.
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Andrew Nicholls @andrewjn.bsky.social · 30/09/2025
Wait, wasn’t this the premise of Hunt For Red October! Which they detected in the first reel…
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Andrew Nicholls @andrewjn.bsky.social · 24/09/2025
I had an escalator stop on me once and that is why today I own Sears
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Andrew Nicholls @andrewjn.bsky.social · 18/09/2025
Johnny would have turned his show over tonight to Jimmy. (Only my guess, but I was Johnnys head writer from ‘88 to ‘92 when he left.)
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Reposted by Andrew Nicholls
Robert Reich @rbreich.bsky.social · 09/09/2025
"We should not have to live in a country where the Government can seize anyone who looks Latino, speaks Spanish, and appears to work a low wage job. Rather than stand idly by while our constitutional freedoms are lost, I dissent." —Justice Sonia Sotomayor
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Andrew Nicholls @andrewjn.bsky.social · 30/08/2025
Buy Moet stock
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Reposted by Andrew Nicholls
The Tennessee Holler @thetnholler.bsky.social · 26/08/2025
🔥 MISSOURI voter to @RepMarkAlford: “You talked about abuses in the Medicare & Medicaid system… Trump just pardoned someone who defrauded the system for about $1.3 BILLION. I find that curious.” (Esformes was then arrested for domestic violence)
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Andrew Nicholls @andrewjn.bsky.social · 21/08/2025
No One Cares About Vague BIRDS shermanoaksreview.com/lint/no-one-...
shermanoaksreview.com
No One Cares About Vague BIRDS
Thank you for submitting your STORY to EditorMatic.  Our algorithms change weekly to accommodate the preferences of FICTION EDITORS as suggested by an automated reading of over 175 LITERARY MAGAZINES....
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Andrew Nicholls @andrewjn.bsky.social · 16/08/2025
Cat On A Not Tin Roof
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Andrew Nicholls @andrewjn.bsky.social · 06/08/2025
In related news, Dahmer says someone else ate those guys
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Andrew Nicholls @andrewjn.bsky.social · 29/07/2025
My kindergarten teacher: Miss Moffet. My jr high librarian: Miss Reading
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Reposted by Andrew Nicholls
Writers Guild of America West @wgawest.bsky.social · 18/07/2025
WGA statement on Paramount’s decision to cancel the Late Show with Stephen Colbert.
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Chris Hayes @chrislhayes.bsky.social · 18/07/2025
Not really an overstatement to say that the test of a free society is whether or not comedians can make fun of the country's leader on TV without repurcussions.
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Andrew Nicholls @andrewjn.bsky.social · 14/07/2025
Come one, come all. Well, not ALL, there’s only 90 seats.
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Andrew Nicholls @andrewjn.bsky.social · 04/07/2025
And “going forward” and “on the ground” can be removed from any sentence containing them. If your reporter’s in Lebanon they’re almost certainly on the ground. The implied pluckiness – that they parachuted in just in time to file – is spurious. This is war zone talk, borrowed valor.
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Andrew Nicholls @andrewjn.bsky.social · 04/07/2025
@NPR.org, might you tell your correspondents to cut it out with the “sort of”s and “kind of”s? I’ve heard “sort of absolutely,” “kind of extremely,” and worse. Ten of these in a single story makes reportage sound like guessing. Also, no authoritative answer to a question begins with “So yeah...”
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Andrew Nicholls @andrewjn.bsky.social · 03/07/2025
When Meatloaf, the singer, a play made For Doris who On Moonlight Bay made, It was easy to see, Categorically, What a Day, and a difference, Aday made.
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Andrew Nicholls @andrewjn.bsky.social · 30/06/2025
that particular camo is not doing what they think it's doing
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Andrew Nicholls @andrewjn.bsky.social · 25/06/2025
www.eventbrite.com/e/as-man-is-...
eventbrite.com
AS MAN IS TO GOD
Join us for a one-man raucous retelling of Werner Herzog's FITZCARRALDO by the comedic 'wildings' of ANDREW NICHOLLS. Photo: Barry Schwartz
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Andrew Nicholls @andrewjn.bsky.social · 24/06/2025
Those who vote for this should thereafter be asked for additional verification of their identity to use a credit card at any business anywhere in the country.
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Andrew Nicholls @andrewjn.bsky.social · 24/06/2025
Oh boy.
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Andrew Nicholls @andrewjn.bsky.social · 22/06/2025
“Not everyone without a bloody fork jammed in their head agrees.”
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Reposted by Andrew Nicholls
PERFECTLY NORMAL @nzpom.com · 20/06/2025
It's about time these stories weren't accompanied by an image of someone frolicking in the water or eating an ice cream. It's not going to stop getting hotter, we really ought to fucking grow up and treat this seriously🤦🏻‍♂️
bbc.co.uk
UK weather: Temperatures to hit 33C for hottest two days in a row
Temperatures could peak at 33C on Friday to break Thursday's record for hottest day of the year.
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Andrew Nicholls @andrewjn.bsky.social · 19/06/2025
(Fran Lebowitz, many years ago: “Trust me, you do not know anyone as stupid as Donald Trump.”)
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Andrew Nicholls @andrewjn.bsky.social · 18/06/2025
The first casualty in war is Ruth.
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Andrew Nicholls @andrewjn.bsky.social · 15/06/2025
Possible time-travel story title: That Was Now And This Is Then.
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Andrew Nicholls @andrewjn.bsky.social · 12/06/2025
Great gag
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Andrew Nicholls @andrewjn.bsky.social · 12/06/2025
P.O.S.feratu
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Andrew Nicholls @andrewjn.bsky.social · 11/06/2025
Sounds disturbingly like what John Cleese said while being hung out a window by his ankles in Fish Called Wanda.
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Andrew Nicholls @andrewjn.bsky.social · 10/06/2025
I don't know whether to be upset with him or with the parts of other people he's made of.
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Andrew Nicholls @andrewjn.bsky.social · 10/06/2025
2- 4- 6 -8… Donald T. licks Putin’s taint!
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Andrew Nicholls @andrewjn.bsky.social · 10/06/2025
Nazi Woodstock
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Andrew Nicholls @andrewjn.bsky.social · 07/06/2025
A zebra is the QR code for a horse
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Andrew Nicholls @andrewjn.bsky.social · 06/06/2025
parents got me a Timex when I was seven, strapped it on my wrist, and said, “when the little hand’s on the eight, come home.” 1960s England.
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Andrew Nicholls @andrewjn.bsky.social · 05/06/2025
Would it be legal for Elon to offer R. Senators $1 m each to vote against the budget bill?
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