iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

Fat stomachs resting on thighs >>>>>>>>>>>

000

I bought several nip covers, one pair that looks like normal nipples, that I want to cut in star shape, and one pair that I'm gonna attach star piercings to (Me ? Obsessed with stars ? Yes.) So no tattoos necessary !

000

Showing you my insecurities : My round stomach (I like ot when it's out, don't like it through clothes) My scars (except my top surgery scars) My chin, especially from the side, especially when I'm smiling

100

I kinda regret keeping my nipples because I regained sensation in a *tiny* area so I can't get them tattooed But I remembered numbing cream is a thing and it's such a small area it should work (I have some, I just don't know where it is)

000

I wore myself out tidying my room so I stayed in bed for like 3-4 days 🙃🙃🙃

000

My anxiety medication is killing my appetite so I forget to eat Since my body can't tell time by my hunger level anymore I go to bed very late and my sleep schedule is fucked

000

I'm now on anti-anxiety medication (very low dose but at least I don't get hit in the face by all the side effects) and off my antidepressants so we'll see how that goes !

000

I've been considering getting a hysterectomy but honestly I don't want to go through the recovery process again and put my body through an other surgery for something that will not be physically noticeable. I'm on progesterone anyway so I already don't have to deal with periods

100

I've been rearranging my stuff for days and I'm actually having fun ????????? Like I'm just sorting through everything and finding ways to make everything easy access and aesthetically pleasing But the more I progress, the messier my room actually is 😅

100

Also : LOOK AT MY BEAUTIFUL CHEST !!!!! (don't pay attention to the white smudges, it's just cream that helps the healing)

Top surgery scars seen from the other side

000

Al Segura @alioucha.bsky.social · 20/03/2025

I started physio therapy today (for my scars) and the practitioner was really sweet. She was also very awkward. I was very stressed because I waw in a new situation so I particularly struggled with answering her questions (my mom helped, she wad with me for support and won't be next time)

100

I can finally carry my cat like a little baby 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰 (I couldn't for the last 3 weeks because I wasn't supposed to use my arms, and she was very distraught and kept screaming to be picked up) Also I think I can start using my rollator again ! Next stop : not having to wear the post-op binder !

100

Al Segura @alioucha.bsky.social · 20/03/2025

I definitely didn't try on all my clothes to see what they look like with a flat chest, I don't know where you got that idea /s (Some of the clothes don't fit me anymore but there are more that actually fit me wayyyy better)

000

Al Segura @alioucha.bsky.social · 20/03/2025

It's nice to see my body evolve since the surgery At the beginning, I was so hunched over and bloated that it looked absolutely ridiculous But now that I can stand a bit straighter, it feels like home ! Sadly, as I am not attracted to men, I find myself looking less attractive..

100

Al Segura @alioucha.bsky.social · 13/03/2025

Having another episode of spasms/paralysis where everything feels like it's in slow motion and moving feels impossible My mouth got paralysed this time, it was weird I somehow felt drunk?! Despite having never actually been drunk ?! It felt like I was trying to wake up from anesthesia

000

Al Segura @alioucha.bsky.social · 13/03/2025

Got the stitches taken out yesterday ! The surgeon also removed a BIG amount of fluid but only on the right side so now everything is off because I need symmetry !!! (The left side now feels swollen but it might be the nocebo effect)

000

Al Segura @alioucha.bsky.social · 04/03/2025

I knew this would happen but it's still annoying: While I'm recovering from my top surgery, I can't use my arms... But I need a rollator to walk, which means using my arms... (or a cane but its even worse) So I spend the afternoon doing errands with my mom and it was sooo hard !!!!!!

100

Al Segura @alioucha.bsky.social · 02/03/2025

I know I'm fat but I did not expect to look like I was gonna steal the moon ! (It's mostly because I'm doing origami with my spine in order not to stretch the scars but it's pretty funny)

media.tenor.com

a cartoon character from despicable me is dancing with his arms in the air

ALT: a cartoon character from despicable me is dancing with his arms in the air

100

Al Segura @alioucha.bsky.social · 02/03/2025

I was surprisingly unstressed about my top surgery and now it's done and it just feels so NORMAL !!! I'm in a bit of pain but mostly frustration from not being able to move how I want (try having Tourette's and restricted mobility) but sadly I'm kinda used to being frustrated and in pain 🙃🙃🙃

000

Al Segura @alioucha.bsky.social · 26/02/2025

I was surprised to be so chill about my upcoming surgery (for the last few days) But I can feel the panic setting in 🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃

100

Al Segura @alioucha.bsky.social · 25/02/2025

I'm scared of what's gonna happen after my top surgery because this has been my reason for being for years now and the only bigger goal that I have is/was to have children. But I want to adopt and this won't be possible for me.

100

Al Segura @alioucha.bsky.social · 15/02/2025

My body was already hating me but spending the night dancing did NOT help (I'm sooo gonna be unable to walk tomorrow)

000

Al Segura @alioucha.bsky.social · 15/02/2025

I'm so cooooold ❄🧊🥶 I was paralysed 3 different times last night.. (the cold makes it worse)

000

Al Segura @alioucha.bsky.social · 15/02/2025

The ballet was nice ! I was scared I'd be bored but then giant rat people came on stage so suffice to say, it was NOT boring

000

I have several disabilities, people are gonna stare anyway Because I use a mobility aid. Because I'm bad at social interactions. Because I have tics. But even if I wanted to look more "normal", I just don't know how to do it I never had to "master the confidence" to dress this way, I just.. do ?

011

I have to go out tomorrow 😭😭 (My body hates me rn) I need to go grocery shopping with my mom, go to the post office and THEN go watch a ballet with my great aunt We're watching the nutcracker, but I hate theaters because the seats are really restricting for me and the sound is always really loud

000

I find myself yearning for summer when it used to be my least favourite season. Who am I becoming ? (But it'll be my first FLAT summer, and a summer without dysphoria sound great ngl)

000

I have two weeks left of boobs !!! (My back will thank me)

000

As a kid I used to think I hated going to my dad's because of my step mom. Until one day I realised she was actually fine, it was MY DAD HIMSELF that I didn't like 🙃🙃

100

After quitting prep school I went to uni. Did a full year fine but then my chronic pains appeared (or worsened I guess ?) and I physically couldn't walk to school anymore so I missed a lot of classes Add to that the anxiety and depression from my meds and I just had to quit (again)

100

Basically when I got into prep school, my Tourette's was becoming very disableing (I mean, it's kind of the point of a "disability") to the point where I couldn't really write (I got the lessons notes from a friend) or STAND or BREATHE properly so my psychiatrist put me on some medication

110

I'M GONNA PUT ALL MY LORE ON THERE, LET'S GOOO

000

At some point, when I was in prep school, I couldn't go to class or to the cafeteria because I couldn't handle stairs (I had to quit soon after that, for obvious reasons). But no one (not even me) thought a single second about asking for a room at ground level.. (And we're supposed to be SMART ™️)

100

I was feeling a bit sick and I was wondering why.. Until it hit me that I haven't eaten in over 6 hours so I'm probably just 🌟hungry🌟

100

It's 4am I should really go to bed but sleeping isn't fun 😫😫😫😫😫😫

100