Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 8hButter would taste better if it contained more than one butt. 161
Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 10hBusy weekend, so I took today off. Editing an early chapter and happily impressed with some of my dialogue. Sometimes, it's good to give the younger you a break. 😆 080
Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 02/10/2026LA: Oh, you wanna keep it metal? That's gonna cost ya. 🤑 000
Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 01/10/2026Ten years ago, I would've argued Americans are generally smart. Now I realize there's way more dumb people than I ever suspected. And, friends, I don't know what I'm supposed to take away from this. It doesn't seem like a lesson Mr. Rogers would've approved of. 🤷 071
Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 01/10/2026Dis wuz maed wit 'SOOPEr InTEllliGenz" Yu betta CALL it dat. 110
Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 01/10/2026Pete Hegseth would totally keep the secret if he was at Cornell btw ... and somehow think he's a warrior for going down with the boys. 080
Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 01/10/2026Anything can be soup if you cry into it for long enough. 030
Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 01/10/2026I think I speak for all of us when I say: Where the fuck did September go? 🤔 060
Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 30/09/2026I can never hear the term "cadaver dog" and not do this.static.klipy.comSesame Street Mah Nàmah NàAlt: Sesame Street Mah Na Mah Na doo doo dah doo song 130
Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 30/09/2026Wake up, slam my head against the wall three times. OK, I can match everyone's energy now. 140
Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 30/09/2026Dammit. AI is too damn dangerous for corporations to be allowed to "police themselves." Trump is a complete buffoon. Dumbest timeline... 151
Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 30/09/2026Taking all these now, so I can post them ten years from now. "Huh ... you looked pretty mid, but it was a younger mid..." 0200
Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 30/09/2026"Mosquito" is far too cute a word for these monsters. 150
Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 29/09/2026I love a good kerfuffle ... especially if the cause is hijinks. 120
Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 29/09/2026If they remade "Falling Down" and updated it for our current times, it'd need to be at least a twelve-hour movie. 020
Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 29/09/2026Timing the trash hitting the can with the final note of the Maiden tune. 🤘 030
Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 29/09/2026Badass kid. 🤘 people.com/chess-prodig...people.com11-Year-Old Girl Becomes Chess’ Youngest-Ever Woman Grandmaster, Says She Wants to ‘Keep Making History’Bodhana Sivanandan, from London, represented England in the 46th Chess Olympiad in Samarkand, Uzbekistan, which was held between Sept. 15 and Sept. 27. The 11-year-old became the youngest-ever woman g... 041
Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 29/09/2026*moves Dystopian section to Current Affairs, and books on democracy to Fantasy section* 161
Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 28/09/2026I used to have a coworker from Scotland who'd walk around the shop with a plateful of treats and ask, in his very thick Scottish accent, "Would ya like a cookie?" And damn, I miss that guy. 050
Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 28/09/2026I wish I were an alpha male, so I could whine and cry about everything. 1112
Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 28/09/2026I'm glad shrinkflation hasn't affected my scoop and a half of raisins in Raisin Bran. I fondly remember watching commercials where they highlight the scoop of raisins. The half scoop of raisins is the best part of Raisin Bran. Whaddaya mean you all don't like raisins? 160
Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 28/09/2026The aliens land. "We're taking our cats back. You people don't deserve them." Spaceship emits an earsplitting "PSPSPS." 070
Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 28/09/2026They should cast a cat as Galactus. I'm serious. 020
Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 28/09/2026Monopoly (the board game) isn't nearly bloody enough. 210
Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 28/09/2026This might actually be the funniest collection of photos I've ever seen. Some real alphas up in here. 😂 000
Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 28/09/2026It's not a plot hole, it's a mystery I've left for you all to figure out. And, when you figure it out, please let me know the solution. 😉 070
Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 27/09/2026These last few months before the midterms will go down as the highest on their own supply these fuckers are ever gonna get. Screenshot everything. Make them explain themselves later. Impeach, convict, remove. And, if they even think they're getting another Supreme Court seat, laugh in their faces. 050
Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 27/09/2026Can I come over? I'll bring my Genesis albums. 130
Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 27/09/2026That thing where people get a headache and wake up with a British accent is wild, innit? 120
Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 26/09/2026"Indiana Jones and the Struggle to Sell an Artifact Valuable Enough to Pay Off His Medical Debt" 150
Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 26/09/2026"Musk/Thiel Say Something Intelligent Challenge" We're waiting. 042
Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 26/09/2026In the spirit of malicious compliance, let's call it "Trump Intelligence" instead, because: A. It is not intelligent. B. It has stolen from everybody. C. It targets minors. (I'm sure we can think of some more.) 020
Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 26/09/2026The world has many problems. Any attempt at solving them should first involve smothering them in cheese. That's the first step. Try it out. See what happens. 190
Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 26/09/2026Crawling from the rubble, I pull the mask over my nose. Poisonous fumes seep in, reeking of sulfur and death. Twelve hands reach for my pack, scrabbling, scratching. Six maghouls eat the business end of my rifle. And I run. The interview's today. Nothing will keep me from my iced coffee. 0111
Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 26/09/2026The media has the best chance to respond like: "Oh, negative coverage? You wanna see negative coverage? Cool. We got you." and then just do 24/7 wall-to-wall interviews with his victims, never asking for a comment or response. But they won't do it. They need him as much as he needs them. 020
Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 26/09/2026I'm surprised we haven't had a Hamburglar redemption arc foisted upon us yet. 150
Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 26/09/2026"Come with me and conform! Yeah, now lick those boots. Isn't this so punk rock of us?"static.klipy.comMonkey Puppet Side-Eye MemeAlt: Monkey Puppet Side-Eye Meme 020
Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 25/09/2026<incessant chirping> Me: "Not every crinkle is for a bird!" The bird: "Au contraire, mon frère." 010
Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 25/09/2026"Would you wear pants to a job interview? Everyone disagrees." 040
Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 25/09/2026This is awful. We need to find homes for these fires. 040
Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 25/09/2026When you've finally earned enough money to retire at 80 without needing to eat cat food, and the company wishes you good luck on your "next great adventure".static.klipy.comSkeleton: My Honest Reaction MemeAlt: Skeleton: My Honest Reaction Meme. A plastic skeleton slowly falling from a standing position. 070
Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 25/09/2026Poured myself a cup of ... myself. Happy Friday, all! 0100
Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 25/09/2026*aggressively spinning the produce bag* "I was there, Gandalf. I was there the day the strength of cucumbers failed." 040
Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 25/09/2026You can use the word "fuck" in place of every part of speech, except for articles like"a", "an", and "the". And that needs to change. 050
