Hannah Kate Kelley @kelleyeditorial.bsky.social · 11/04/2025P4: Clear tone, good writing and I really like CH. 1's start. The brief prologue feels necessary, but I wonder if a little more context could help orient readers. What's the MC's last memory? Why do they think their friends are with them? 250
Hannah Kate Kelley @kelleyeditorial.bsky.social · 11/04/2025QL5: YA Fantasy. QL conveys sweet tone. Could use more clarification. Is the MC's boss the same as the group's leader? And does the MC unravel a conspiracy with their love interest? And could use more specific MC goal and stakes for external plot. 140
Hannah Kate Kelley @kelleyeditorial.bsky.social · 11/04/2025P5: Good context and sense of MC's drive. Could use a slower buildup to first scene's climax so we understand why their last resort must happen. Would love more worldbuilding, magic system description and more set-up for MC before second scene. 130
