Hannah Kate Kelley @kelleyeditorial.bsky.social · 11/04/2025P3: Lovely, eerie prose. Second-hand narration in first scene does good job of portraying MC and villain. Good pacing and setting description. But all internal monologue so far and could use more dialogue and scene action soon. 150
Hannah Kate Kelley @kelleyeditorial.bsky.social · 11/04/2025QL4: Adult Thriller. Strong QL. Maybe there can be a stronger connection between MC's past and current killings. Why (does MC think) the killer is targeting these people and that they might know the MC's secrets? And is MC's goal to expose the killers or just protect their community? 140
Hannah Kate Kelley @kelleyeditorial.bsky.social · 11/04/2025P4: Clear tone, good writing and I really like CH. 1's start. The brief prologue feels necessary, but I wonder if a little more context could help orient readers. What's the MC's last memory? Why do they think their friends are with them? 250
