iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

Zzii- Sloth😈 VillainTuber @ziforyu.bsky.social · 30/09/2026

i've shared your game to my creator friends. hoping we can play some time soon if we can. is it possible to stream it or record and upload in youtube?

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Zzii- Sloth😈 VillainTuber @ziforyu.bsky.social · 11/09/2026

art doesnt have to be to be impactful, it just has to be fun. and art is my life.

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Zzii- Sloth😈 VillainTuber @ziforyu.bsky.social · 11/09/2026

i think the vtuber community saved my life not by making me famous (im not famous at all and i barely get likes anyway) but by redirecting my negative self attention to something, albeit non-impactful, but fun worthy enough to keep my life around a little longer.

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Zzii- Sloth😈 VillainTuber @ziforyu.bsky.social · 11/09/2026

flipping your mindset doesnt happen in a single moment, but one single step at a time, but you have to have faith in those steps. sometimes you fall back down, but you gotta keep looking up and keep taking those steps. it's the only way to get out of the mud.

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Zzii- Sloth😈 VillainTuber @ziforyu.bsky.social · 11/09/2026

i started drawing people who are in the same community, and called it "drawing the community", and it was fun! i remembered why i enjoyed drawing people. i remembered why i drew in the first place. for the first time in a while, the urge to draw for fun was more prominent.

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Zzii- Sloth😈 VillainTuber @ziforyu.bsky.social · 11/09/2026

i've streamed in the past before, but it was an accountability tactic so i do my job and if i'm not, anyone can see my shame of procrastinating. but this time, i decided to slowly stream art in the monicker of a vtuber.

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Zzii- Sloth😈 VillainTuber @ziforyu.bsky.social · 11/09/2026

i pride myself of being fast and i was able to finish her model and in short months of work, her model was up and running. and she introduced me to her viewers. it was warm and welcoming. at this point it is 10 months of nothing but coldness. people were happy of my art.

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Zzii- Sloth😈 VillainTuber @ziforyu.bsky.social · 11/09/2026

it still gave me motivation, and putting all that energy into something meaningful, an asset, and my work being wanted. at this point in time, my identity was just my art, so i have to emphasize how this really meant something deep for me.

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Zzii- Sloth😈 VillainTuber @ziforyu.bsky.social · 11/09/2026

it was my first ever vtuber commission. she wanted me to design and make her vtuber model-- and technically my first ever high priced commission (despite being low looking back, i think i only charged her 200$ lmao) it's weird but it motivated me

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Zzii- Sloth😈 VillainTuber @ziforyu.bsky.social · 11/09/2026

my body and soul went to full survival mode in contention of the urge. and it remained like that every single day for months. only a handful of people know i was going through it, nobody knew how each day was a 50-50. then a friend approached "what's your rate? POST YOUR RATE"🤣

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Zzii- Sloth😈 VillainTuber @ziforyu.bsky.social · 11/09/2026

it honestly shook me to the core. so this is what it feels like. i told those who can handle the detail, and i immediately trashed the plan, for whatever reason, something deep inside overwhelmed the " l’appel du vide "

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Zzii- Sloth😈 VillainTuber @ziforyu.bsky.social · 11/09/2026

the 1st drawing on the list i've done, posted it, sent it to the recipient, after that, i felt my body shut down-- from 8 hours of sleep switching to 13-15. no motivation to do everything else, even eat, and i love eating. but i was hyperfocused on that list. i felt the change

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Zzii- Sloth😈 VillainTuber @ziforyu.bsky.social · 11/09/2026

i seriously was at that pace to oblivion, making a list to do, what to wear, what to use, where to do it. i wanted to make sure i have a decent outfit, looking onward to a decent scenery post self termination. most of the list was drawing the friends that i hold dear.

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Zzii- Sloth😈 VillainTuber @ziforyu.bsky.social · 11/09/2026

in 2020, i had just broke up with an ex, that had isolated me from friends, my grandpa passed away, and so did my dog. all within the first 2 months of this particular year, as well as the worldwide pandemic coming into full swing. everything was at an all time low for me.

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Zzii- Sloth😈 VillainTuber @ziforyu.bsky.social · 11/09/2026

long Suicide Prevention Day post CW; dont read beyond if you're sensitive to this but i urge you be compassionate to those who are going through it. Funny how things fall into place when you see it through. i was in a horrible headspace in 2020, vtubing redirected that energy

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