iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 04/10/2026

Looking for influencers who can do a positive video about us. We don’t care if you have to lie.

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Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 02/10/2026

We’ll increase the height limit if anyone over 6ft promises to duck.

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Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 30/09/2026

We need to “fire” Hush-Hush but we’re scared. If anyone wants to help us out you’ll get free attendance for life.

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Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 29/09/2026

how to raise 5 billion quickly?

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Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 27/09/2026

We don’t do “rope drops” at Wonder Park. Do you know how much one of those giant ropes cost?! Get real.

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Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 23/09/2026

What’s your least favorite ride in the park? We’ll take your feedback and do nothing with it.

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Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 21/09/2026

New employee training program includes getting slapped by a guest.

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Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 20/09/2026

Switching to tillamook cheese for our nacho river rapid ride.

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Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 19/09/2026

We will start playing the sounds of children laughing and cheering over all the park speakers to help cover up the sounds of screaming and crying.

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Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 17/09/2026

I know the inter dimensional black hole looks fun but it’s not a ride. We don’t know where it came from. You’re welcome to explore but keep in mind it’s a one way trip.

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Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 16/09/2026

what’s expiration date on a churro? legally.

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Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 14/09/2026

Painting all our coasters rust brown so you can no longer tell.

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Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 11/09/2026

Dammit! No pun intended, but who leaked this story?!?

Photo of a rollercoaster with the caption “Man gets diarrhea on rollercoaster and splashes 14 people”

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Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 10/09/2026

Anyone know how to remove blood stains from rollercoaster seats? Asking for a friend.

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Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 08/09/2026

Tired to buy the Arieforce One coaster but apparently coupons and unlimited foot massages wasn’t good enough.

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Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 07/09/2026

It’s Labor Day. We let the employees take the day off but the parks still open. Help yourselves, just lock up after or the raccoons will get in again.

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Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 04/09/2026

im stuck in the bathroom stall next to the gift shop. send help.

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Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 31/08/2026

New shirts available in the gift shop!

T-shirt design that says “Deep Fried Mayo Cube Slut”

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Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 29/08/2026

Our Fortune Teller is in training. They may predict your death, it’s probably not true. Don’t sue us.

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Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 28/08/2026

If anyone wants to submit a rollercoaster design idea we’ll submit through ChatGPT to analyze. The design with the least amount of injuries will get built.

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Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 26/08/2026

Just discovered that Hush-Hush has been asking guests for their autographs. Please be advised whatever he is having you sign is soul binding.

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Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 25/08/2026

You have to ask for “No Baileys” in your coffee if you don’t want it. It comes standard at our coffee shop. Always has.

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Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 24/08/2026

You’re not here today so we thought we’d draw you in!

Abandoned amusement park with stick figure drawn in.

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Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 21/08/2026

beans. we need more beans. That’s what our guest surveys all said.

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Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 20/08/2026

In our endless quest to be the absolute worst, we’re also installing mini data centers next to each toilet in all the bathrooms. Maybe the loud droning sounds will cover up the mistakes you made ordering Deep Fried Mayo Cubes.

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Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 19/08/2026

Replacing all our ride photo cameras with flock cameras.

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Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 18/08/2026

Hush-Hush started an Only Fans and let me tell you, if you want to see some truly haunting things, that is the place to go.

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Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 17/08/2026

Anyone have the phone number for Wonder Bread? We have a partnership idea.

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Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 11/08/2026

When we put up designated smoking areas, we didn’t think we had to specify “not crack” but yet here we are…

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Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 06/08/2026

We should clarify. It’s not water or fans or shade or anything. We’re handing out sunglasses, fanny packs and other items we think might make you look cool.

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Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 06/08/2026

Its a hot one today so we will have cooling stations available around the park today.

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Reposted by Wonder Park

Matt @thehairycrisp.bsky.social · 31/07/2026

• A set of dentures to replace the teeth you lost on the rollercoaster • A souvenir bolt from one of the rides (although there do seem to be an awful lot of them just lying around on the floor) • A lollipop stick (lollipop not included)

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Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 30/07/2026

Looking for ideas for prizes for our carnival games. So far we have: • AA Battery • Personalized Hush-Hush Voicemail greeting • Mayo Cube plushie • Paper cut machine • Low Five • Mystery Bag • Lost & Found first pick coupon.

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Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 28/07/2026

Our Annual “Collect The Coins But Don’t Die Doing It” event is NEXT WEEK! We will open the gates around the rollercoasters and any dropped coins/belongings/items you collect you get to keep!

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Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 27/07/2026

Ma’am, our lost and found does not include toenails.

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Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 25/07/2026

more “weeeeee”s have been added to a few of the rides.

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Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 23/07/2026

To clarify, our mechanics are super depressed and we don’t know what to do.

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Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 23/07/2026

The ride breakdowns will continue until morale improves!

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Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 23/07/2026

Question from our food & beverage dept: how stale does something have to be before you will no longer buy it?

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Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 22/07/2026

Anyone know how to make a quick $300k?!

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Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 21/07/2026

NOW HIRING: Social Media Person.

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Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 20/07/2026

Cute new HR lady on staff. Should I ask her out?

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Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 16/07/2026

You don’t have to worry about contracting Cyclospora here. All our food already causes explosive diarrhea.

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Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 15/07/2026

Pretty boring day at the park today. Somebody do something stupid we can post about.

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Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 13/07/2026

Last night the employees discovered the bumper cars still work outside of the bumper car area so now the ride just got a lot more exciting for everyone!

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Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 11/07/2026

It’s hot today. Stay hydrated. Water Bottles only $12. Cold Water Bottles $15.

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Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 09/07/2026

We are aware of the guest bathing in the fountain. He’s a contest winner. Stop reporting it.

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Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 08/07/2026

The casino across the street wants to know if we want to go halfsies on a casino riverboat. They claim it’s legit but we live no where near a river to verify.

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Wonder Park @wonderpark.bsky.social · 07/07/2026

Please make sure you return all nuts and bolts if you rent one of our coasters. We’re not gonna check when we re-assemble it.

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