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WTH?!

@whatthehelldoiknow.bsky.social
495 followers 347 following 3.8K posts

Lover of heavy metal and all things humorous. And cats. Definitely cats. #Metalsky

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WTH?! @whatthehelldoiknow.bsky.social · 52m
Guy with creepy smile: Do I weird you out or have I weirded you in?
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WTH?! @whatthehelldoiknow.bsky.social · 2h
(\_/) (•_•) / >🎃
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WTH?! @whatthehelldoiknow.bsky.social · 15/10/2026
Does a mini series count? I Will Find You for Tax Purposes
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WTH?! @whatthehelldoiknow.bsky.social · 13/10/2026
Fredposting
static.klipy.com
Freddy Krueger Puts On Shades
Alt: Freddy Krueger Puts On Shades
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WTH?! @whatthehelldoiknow.bsky.social · 08/10/2026
You're invited to the Bluesky Halloween party. Show off your costume. 🎃
Black t-shirt with a piece of duct tape across the front.
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Kimber Johnson @kimberjohnson.bsky.social · 07/10/2026
Just posted my latest short story. It's my Spooky Season treat for you. I hope you enjoy it! 🎃👻🖤✨ medium.com/@kimberjohns...
medium.com
The Beautiful Volunteer (A Short Story)
In Brookvale, loneliness doesn’t kill you… until it does.
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WTH?! @whatthehelldoiknow.bsky.social · 06/10/2026
Oof…
Julius Caesar and Brutus walked into a movie theater. 

Caesar said to Brutus ‘What should we watch?’ 

Brutus replied ‘The one with the creepy clown who feeds on children looks interesting.’

Caesar asked ‘It Two, Brute?’
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WTH?! @whatthehelldoiknow.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
Found these awesome grapes at the farmers market yesterday.
Concord grapes washed and measured 


Grapes cooking down Grape juice!
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WTH?! @whatthehelldoiknow.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
The sun shining through the trees.
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WTH?! @whatthehelldoiknow.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
‘Holding the Moon’ by Eric Hock
A bare tree at dusk. An orange moon is in the picture looking like it is held perfectly by the branches.
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Kimber Johnson @kimberjohnson.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
Thought I'd share another of my poems for #NationalPoetryDay
The Aftertaste 

Disappointment is a quiet poison,
it doesn’t kill, it curdles.
It sits on the tongue like burnt citrus,
that sharp, metallic sting of almost.
You swallow, thinking it will fade,
but it lingers...
a ghost of what you wanted,
a bruise from something that never even happened.
And the worst part?
It tastes familiar.
Like you’ve been here before,
mouth full of promises that dissolved
the moment you tried to bite down.
Because nothing is more human
than expecting sweetness
and getting the rind instead.

by Kimber Johnson
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WTH?! @whatthehelldoiknow.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
It’s the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown. 🎃👻
Two pie pumpkins on either side of a very large pumpkin.
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WTH?! @whatthehelldoiknow.bsky.social · 26/09/2026
qt what you bring to interviews instead of iced coffee, wrong answers only
static.klipy.com
Jon Taffer's Really Shitty Attitude on Bar Rescue
Alt: Jon Taffer saying A Really Shitty Attitude on Bar Rescue
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Reposted by WTH?!
Kimber Johnson @kimberjohnson.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
Just posted my latest short story. This one is a lot of fun. Join three ambitious strivers as they walk into The Hustle House... I hope you enjoy it! 😀 medium.com/@kimberjohns...
medium.com
The Hustle House (A Short Story)
Innovation demands sacrifice. Mostly yours.
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WTH?! @whatthehelldoiknow.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
Calgon, take me down to the Paradise City.
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Kimber Johnson @kimberjohnson.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
If you're interested, here is some more of my #poetry I hope you enjoy it.
The Quiet Tilt

The horizon loosens its fist
and spills a thin gold rumor
across the quiet stones.
Last night’s shadows,
those archivists of what was,
fold themselves back into the soil.
A single beam slips in,
soft as a new idea,
and the world tilts..
not loudly,
but with the hush of a page
turning itself.
And you,
still half‑stitched to yesterday,
feel the light rearrange your edges
until you fit the moment
that wasn’t possible
five breaths ago.
Nothing announces the shift.
It simply happens..
the way morning happens,
quietly rewriting everything
that thought it was permanent.

by Kimber Johnson
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WTH?! @whatthehelldoiknow.bsky.social · 19/09/2026
Share your mood for the weekend! 🖤
static.klipy.com
Cat Playing in Autumn Leaves
Alt: Cat Playing in Autumn Leaves
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WTH?! @whatthehelldoiknow.bsky.social · 19/09/2026
How would you describe your social media reach? Mine:
static.klipy.com
Charley Brown's Missed Football Kick
Alt: Charley Brown's Missed Football Kick
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Kimber Johnson @kimberjohnson.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
I know several of you have read my short stories, I thought you may be interested in checking out my #poetry
Ash Theory

The night keeps a ledger
in carbon‑black ink,
tallying every bright thing
that thought it could outrun
its own combustion.
We rise like hypotheses,
confident, elegant,
until the world performs
its small, cruel experiment
and proves us mortal.
Still..
there’s a strange prestige
in being temporary:
even the stars
are just long‑burning failures
pretending permanence.
And the ash?
It remembers everything
we tried to become
and didn’t.

by Kimber Johnson
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WTH?! @whatthehelldoiknow.bsky.social · 10/09/2026
What's your sign?
A sign in grass alongside a road. The sign reads: I finally stopped drinking for good!  Now I drink for evil. 😍
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WTH?! @whatthehelldoiknow.bsky.social · 10/09/2026
[being tortured] TORTURER: You can be water-boarded, or you can share a fun fact about yourself with the group. ME: Get the hose.
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WTH?! @whatthehelldoiknow.bsky.social · 04/09/2026
Update a band or song: ‘Die With Your Crocs On’ - Iron Maiden
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WTH?! @whatthehelldoiknow.bsky.social · 03/09/2026
Name a character you can't stand.
The Governer-The Walking Dead.
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WTH?! @whatthehelldoiknow.bsky.social · 31/08/2026
Post something Random, or you'll have an awful September.
Fisher Price: Their First Ouija 
Summon and Learn
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WTH?! @whatthehelldoiknow.bsky.social · 30/08/2026
Found a new neighbor today.
A monarch butterfly caterpillar enjoying some milkweed.
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WTH?! @whatthehelldoiknow.bsky.social · 28/08/2026
A few scenes from today’s hike.
A boulder with a tree growing on it. A brook running through moss covered rocks. A field of fernsA tree looking slightly scorched.
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WTH?! @whatthehelldoiknow.bsky.social · 28/08/2026
How it feels to follow me
static.klipy.com
Golden Girls: Are You Alive?
Alt: Golden Girls: Are You Alive?
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WTH?! @whatthehelldoiknow.bsky.social · 24/08/2026
Jones Soda would like a word.
A 4 pack of Jones Special Release Turkey and Gravy.
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Reposted by WTH?!
Kimber Johnson @kimberjohnson.bsky.social · 18/08/2026
Just posted my latest short story. This is a fun one, I hope you enjoy it. 🙂 Step inside as the curtain rises on a performance that shouldn’t exist.. medium.com/@kimberjohns...
medium.com
The Show Inside Your Head (A Short Story)
Tonight’s performance is private. Uncomfortably so.
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WTH?! @whatthehelldoiknow.bsky.social · 16/08/2026
A sweet and a savory loaf of zucchini bread
Back loaf is zucchini herb beer bread 
Front loaf is whole wheat zucchini bread sweetened with honey
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WTH?! @whatthehelldoiknow.bsky.social · 15/08/2026
I need my phone to recognize when I’m being sarcastic and suggest the appropriate emoji.
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WTH?! @whatthehelldoiknow.bsky.social · 14/08/2026
See a ranger, post a ranger
Smokey the Bear saying ‘Only you can prevent wildfires’.
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WTH?! @whatthehelldoiknow.bsky.social · 14/08/2026
Excited to make some things today.
2 delicata squash, 2 zucchini, 1 yellow squash, 1 tomato, 1 jalapeno and 1 pickling cucumber
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WTH?! @whatthehelldoiknow.bsky.social · 13/08/2026
Speak your truth.
I go to work, I make my coworkers wonder what is wrong with me, and then I clock out.
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WTH?! @whatthehelldoiknow.bsky.social · 11/08/2026
Your last saved meme is your moral philosophy.
Painting of a man pointing at a fire. Text reads:  Shit’s on fire, yo.
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WTH?! @whatthehelldoiknow.bsky.social · 11/08/2026
😍
A bed of black eyed susans
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WTH?! @whatthehelldoiknow.bsky.social · 08/08/2026
If you see this, hand over the snacks you bring to bsky (if you feel like it)
Homemade chocolate chip cupcakes 
Homemade granola
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WTH?! @whatthehelldoiknow.bsky.social · 07/08/2026
Patiently waiting for them to be ready to eat.
Top view of a jar of pickles showing cucumbers, garlic cloves and dill.  Waiting for the brine to cool.
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WTH?! @whatthehelldoiknow.bsky.social · 06/08/2026
Hello dill pickles. 😋
Three pickling cucumbers picked from the vine.
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WTH?! @whatthehelldoiknow.bsky.social · 05/08/2026
I feel like we aren’t even trying anymore…
Page a day calendar with joke reading:

Knock, knock

Who’s there?

Doorbell repairman.
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WTH?! @whatthehelldoiknow.bsky.social · 04/08/2026
Without downloading new pics, whats it like dating you?
I’m pretty weird for a normal person, but I act pretty normal for a weirdo.
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Papa Woof und Krampus und Bleaken @papawoof.bsky.social · 03/08/2026
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WTH?! @whatthehelldoiknow.bsky.social · 31/07/2026
Your last saved meme is your moral philosophy
Sign reading:

Ice cream ➡️

Cruel world ⬅️
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WTH?! @whatthehelldoiknow.bsky.social · 30/07/2026
#PeaceSells2026 #MusicChallenge Day 31 In My Darkest Hour youtu.be/I_RgZKzF8bU?... Thanks for hosting Kimber! 🤘
youtu.be
In My Darkest Hour (Remastered 2004)
YouTube video by Megadeth - Topic
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WTH?! @whatthehelldoiknow.bsky.social · 30/07/2026
Your last text message is now your epitaph. What does your tombstone say? And the buzzards are circling… 😬
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WTH?! @whatthehelldoiknow.bsky.social · 29/07/2026
First harvest
Two yellow squash and a zucchini fresh from the garden.
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WTH?! @whatthehelldoiknow.bsky.social · 29/07/2026
#PeaceSells2026 #MusicChallenge Day 30 Hangar 18 youtu.be/x5A9Aa-WU5E?...
youtu.be
Hangar 18 (2004 Remix)
YouTube video by Megadeth - Topic
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WTH?! @whatthehelldoiknow.bsky.social · 29/07/2026
Drop some trucks
static.klipy.com
Maximum Overdrive
Alt: A scene from Maximum Overdrive where the trucks are circling.
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WTH?! @whatthehelldoiknow.bsky.social · 28/07/2026
#PeaceSells2026 #MusicChallenge Day 29 Good Mourning/Black Friday youtu.be/S_1dHzlWzns?...
youtu.be
Megadeth - "Good Mourning/Black Friday" - Peace Sells... But Who's Buying? (1986)
YouTube video by Megadeth
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WTH?! @whatthehelldoiknow.bsky.social · 27/07/2026
#PeaceSells2026 #MusicChallenge Day 28 Peace Sells youtu.be/LVhJy-CR64Q?...
youtu.be
Peace Sells (2004 Remaster)
YouTube video by Megadeth - Topic
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