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Jalen M.

@waterboy4hire.bsky.social
48 followers 78 following 578 posts

I pretend to like movies & videogames // He•Him // v3.2 linktr.ee/waterboy4hire

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Jalen M. @waterboy4hire.bsky.social · 10/10/2026
Got to hear Hayley Williams sing ‘Drunk in Love’ live in front of my wife and almost levitated
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Jalen M. @waterboy4hire.bsky.social · 09/07/2026
Holy shit
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Jalen M. @waterboy4hire.bsky.social · 15/06/2026
Deck Nine randomly gives Max a mombod for two scenes
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Jalen M. @waterboy4hire.bsky.social · 11/06/2026
It’s 2026, why is BuzzFeed still a running company?
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Jalen M. @waterboy4hire.bsky.social · 02/06/2026
Dropped a can of croissants in the store and accidentally gave half the store nightmares
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Jalen M. @waterboy4hire.bsky.social · 27/04/2026
Yeah, I’m not too keen on Islamic/Arabic terminology becoming so jokingly said.
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Jalen M. @waterboy4hire.bsky.social · 12/04/2026
No taxes owed and three car payments left 🥹
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Jalen M. @waterboy4hire.bsky.social · 09/04/2026
Theres this white woman in utter disbelief that this Panera Bread is closed down lmaooooo
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Jalen M. @waterboy4hire.bsky.social · 30/03/2026
This game is great
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Jalen M. @waterboy4hire.bsky.social · 21/03/2026
Idk how people find Cheesecake Factory edible
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Jalen M. @waterboy4hire.bsky.social · 16/03/2026
FOR THE LOVE OF GOD PUSH TEAMS
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Jalen M. @waterboy4hire.bsky.social · 16/03/2026
Got a nasty team wipe that I couldn’t clip because I was also streaming the Oscars while the Tie was announced lmao
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Jalen M. @waterboy4hire.bsky.social · 14/03/2026
Undertone? More like underbaked. boxd.it/dvK4mb
boxd.it
A ★★½ review of undertone (2025)
Sound design and visuals are doing some intensive heavy lifting.  Everything else, even more so the lead and pacing, drastically drag the movie down.
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Jalen M. @waterboy4hire.bsky.social · 12/03/2026
There are no “friendlies” in Marathon. You’re going to get this finisher if you’re trying to extract or not.
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Jalen M. @waterboy4hire.bsky.social · 11/03/2026
Forty five hours later and no shiny
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Jalen M. @waterboy4hire.bsky.social · 09/03/2026
Marathon feels very Apex coded. Idk how else to explain it.
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Jalen M. @waterboy4hire.bsky.social · 06/03/2026
The streak of me not liking Maggie’s movies continues! boxd.it/dpvcUr
boxd.it
A ★★½ review of The Bride! (2026)
I would rather not, indeed.
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Jalen M. @waterboy4hire.bsky.social · 05/03/2026
In nerd news: Chronically online “comic” fans find out there are different shades of Green
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Jalen M. @waterboy4hire.bsky.social · 04/03/2026
lol
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Jalen M. @waterboy4hire.bsky.social · 03/03/2026
Unsubbed from a patreon of several years because they had a take so bad it pissed me off
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Jalen M. @waterboy4hire.bsky.social · 01/03/2026
People put 30 hours into a server test and then ask “why am I burned out already” when the full game releases
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Jalen M. @waterboy4hire.bsky.social · 25/02/2026
Hot a pothole so hard my high beams and wipers came on.
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Jalen M. @waterboy4hire.bsky.social · 16/02/2026
Romeo is a deadman is exactly my shit
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Jalen M. @waterboy4hire.bsky.social · 15/02/2026
People have weird takes about Emerald Fennell. She’s 3/3. boxd.it/d8sNaB
boxd.it
A ★★★½ review of Wuthering Heights (2026)
It’s just horned out Romeo & Juliet??? That’s all you had to tell me. You can’t just casually drop 18th century freaknik being started by a hanging and then never explain it lmao. Isabella didn’t dese...
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Jalen M. @waterboy4hire.bsky.social · 13/02/2026
I feel as if the entire studio behind Romeo is a Deadman collectively does acid together
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Jalen M. @waterboy4hire.bsky.social · 12/02/2026
New silent hill looks interesting
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Jalen M. @waterboy4hire.bsky.social · 12/02/2026
Hell yeah I’m down for whatever the fuck that Chicken game is
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Jalen M. @waterboy4hire.bsky.social · 12/02/2026
Bitch, that’s a Rubix cube
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Jalen M. @waterboy4hire.bsky.social · 12/02/2026
KENAAAAAA
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Jalen M. @waterboy4hire.bsky.social · 11/02/2026
I would hate to make a MP focus game in the current climate
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Jalen M. @waterboy4hire.bsky.social · 11/02/2026
Ella Mai’s album is really good
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Jalen M. @waterboy4hire.bsky.social · 11/02/2026
Everyone is going on tour and everyone is stopping in Houston damn near the same week
media.tenor.com
a woman is stretching her arms in front of a computer screen
ALT: a woman is stretching her arms in front of a computer screen
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Jalen M. @waterboy4hire.bsky.social · 10/02/2026
Why is Your Name still so expensive?
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Reposted by Jalen M.
Culture Crave 🍿 @culturecrave.co · 09/02/2026
New details on 'Marvel Tōkon: Fighting Souls' 🎮 • Will have 20 characters at launch • Online lobbies will have up to 64 players • There will be a single-player mode with lore
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Reposted by Jalen M.
Shinobi602 @shinobi602.bsky.social · 09/02/2026
‘God of War’ live-action series casts Callum Vinson (Chucky, The Night Agent) as Atreus ➡️ variety.com/2026/tv/news... #GodofWar
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Jalen M. @waterboy4hire.bsky.social · 09/02/2026
Just finding out that my local Alamo Drafthouse is no more
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Jalen M. @waterboy4hire.bsky.social · 07/02/2026
Oh Prince Baelor, I love you.
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Jalen M. @waterboy4hire.bsky.social · 07/02/2026
DABURA DID WHAT NOW #JJKMODULO
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Jalen M. @waterboy4hire.bsky.social · 07/02/2026
Within two track Cole got to his homophobic bars
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Jalen M. @waterboy4hire.bsky.social · 06/02/2026
Gamers do know that Baldur’s Gate isn’t Larian’s…right?
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Jalen M. @waterboy4hire.bsky.social · 06/02/2026
Don’t quit your day job, Mark. boxd.it/d0B735
boxd.it
A ★ review of Iron Lung (2025)
I have nothing nice to say
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Jalen M. @waterboy4hire.bsky.social · 06/02/2026
That dude from Larian as been crashing out on main about the show lmaooooo
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Jalen M. @waterboy4hire.bsky.social · 05/02/2026
For a game franchise that “no one cares about” there’s quite a few people caring about a parallel story in a different genre
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Jalen M. @waterboy4hire.bsky.social · 05/02/2026
Looks fun!
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Jalen M. @waterboy4hire.bsky.social · 04/02/2026
All it took was thre alt girls to get me to watch women’s figure skating
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Jalen M. @waterboy4hire.bsky.social · 03/02/2026
media.tenor.com
a man in a suit and tie is saying yeah , i 'm thinking i 'm back
ALT: a man in a suit and tie is saying yeah , i 'm thinking i 'm back
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Jalen M. @waterboy4hire.bsky.social · 02/02/2026
MY GIRL
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Jalen M. @waterboy4hire.bsky.social · 31/01/2026
I be reposting things on tiktok like my momma doesn’t follow me
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Jalen M. @waterboy4hire.bsky.social · 30/01/2026
Camp is back, baby boxd.it/cTzKvv
boxd.it
A ★★★½ review of Send Help (2026)
Sometimes the monster you made also really liked Bear Grylls
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Jalen M. @waterboy4hire.bsky.social · 29/01/2026
Over/Under five years we get a movie remake rendition of Hamilton?
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