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Ol’ Illiterate Whale Shark

@vhalechark.bsky.social
374 followers 155 following 245 posts

Internet moron with nice traps

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Ol’ Illiterate Whale Shark @vhalechark.bsky.social · 3h
The reason Richard Scarry hasn’t written a new Busy Town book since the 1990s is because canonically, Busy Town was destroyed in a nuclear exchange between the U.S. and rogue Soviet nuclear forces in post U.S.S.R. Kazakhstan
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Ol’ Illiterate Whale Shark @vhalechark.bsky.social · 10h
Do you think 9/11 happened in the Busy World of Richard Scarry?
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Ol’ Illiterate Whale Shark @vhalechark.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
I have joined the war against nature on the side of nature. I’m giving the trees nuclear weapons and cigarettes
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Ol’ Illiterate Whale Shark @vhalechark.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
They’re giving crabs chainsaws, have you heard about this? They’re saying you deserve to get your ankles sawed in half if you go in the water.
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Ol’ Illiterate Whale Shark @vhalechark.bsky.social · 05/10/2026
Why is everyone on Peppa pig so mean to daddy pig? “Daddy pig, you bumbling sack of shit, you’ve fucked it up again!” They absolutely hate that man
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Ol’ Illiterate Whale Shark @vhalechark.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
I used all my attribute points on strength and zero on personality which is why all of my posts suck ass
Chest naked idiot with nice beef muscles
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Ol’ Illiterate Whale Shark @vhalechark.bsky.social · 04/10/2026
🎵 I’ve got a pocket got a pocket full of dead snails
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Ol’ Illiterate Whale Shark @vhalechark.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
People are always asking, “hey Charko can I see your big beefy chest?” never, “hey Charko can I see your 1973 Corvette Stingray?” (I don’t have one)
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Ol’ Illiterate Whale Shark @vhalechark.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
Are you there god? It’s me, guy with an erection that has now lasted 3 hours and 59 minutes
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Ol’ Illiterate Whale Shark @vhalechark.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
Sorry if you hear a rattling sound when you start your car, I slingshotted 5 whole bags of skittles into your tailpipe
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Ol’ Illiterate Whale Shark @vhalechark.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
More animals should have tusks. We need lobsters with tusks. I want to watch a lobster gore an eel to death.
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Ol’ Illiterate Whale Shark @vhalechark.bsky.social · 15/09/2026
Louis Vuittonka Truck
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Ol’ Illiterate Whale Shark @vhalechark.bsky.social · 01/09/2026
Ordered lunch from Jimmy John’s and the subs were so fast I freaked, but sexually, so they called the cops on me
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Ol’ Illiterate Whale Shark @vhalechark.bsky.social · 21/08/2026
Bitch so tall I’m going up on her
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Ol’ Illiterate Whale Shark @vhalechark.bsky.social · 12/07/2026
Women should have more than one clitoris. I don’t know where they would put it, but it seems kind of stingy to limit them to just one.
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Ol’ Illiterate Whale Shark @vhalechark.bsky.social · 30/06/2026
Do you want to come over and feed me dessert sexually?
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Ol’ Illiterate Whale Shark @vhalechark.bsky.social · 25/06/2026
You still can’t DM me your bhole on this site and that’s why I don’t regularly use it
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Ol’ Illiterate Whale Shark @vhalechark.bsky.social · 25/06/2026
Just saw a pornographic cartoon on the TL. Hell yeah
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Ol’ Illiterate Whale Shark @vhalechark.bsky.social · 12/06/2026
But if I’m cranking my hawg crazy style and you’re cranking your hawg crazy style who’s driving this truck full of rabid gorillas?
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Ol’ Illiterate Whale Shark @vhalechark.bsky.social · 10/06/2026
I have worked out so much that I am now 100% beef. I am an entire beef castle.
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Ol’ Illiterate Whale Shark @vhalechark.bsky.social · 09/06/2026
Kicked out of VS for going down on a mannequin
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Ol’ Illiterate Whale Shark @vhalechark.bsky.social · 08/06/2026
I’m sorry for the things I said when you called me while my wiener was in the glory hole
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Ol’ Illiterate Whale Shark @vhalechark.bsky.social · 06/06/2026
Mmmm, ice cold cloaca cola
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Ol’ Illiterate Whale Shark @vhalechark.bsky.social · 06/06/2026
Be warned, I have a running start and a boner
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Ol’ Illiterate Whale Shark @vhalechark.bsky.social · 05/06/2026
Trade proposal: you receive [your house cleaned sounds] I receive [graphic blowjob sounds]
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Ol’ Illiterate Whale Shark @vhalechark.bsky.social · 18/04/2026
I have been called the MJ of showing my cock to people who ask to see it
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Ol’ Illiterate Whale Shark @vhalechark.bsky.social · 11/03/2026
*Tim Curry voice* SPACE!
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Ol’ Illiterate Whale Shark @vhalechark.bsky.social · 09/03/2026
What’s good bsky? Just doing my monthly check in to see if it’s okay for me to post full on naked hawg yet
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Ol’ Illiterate Whale Shark @vhalechark.bsky.social · 06/03/2026
I accidentally made the gym a gallery. They’re saying my cock and ball sweat print on the prone hamstring curl machine is art like they’ve never seen before
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Ol’ Illiterate Whale Shark @vhalechark.bsky.social · 25/02/2026
Fun animal fact: tarantulas can’t own restaurants in Sacramento due to California’s discriminatory business laws
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Ol’ Illiterate Whale Shark @vhalechark.bsky.social · 24/02/2026
*lips directly on mic* cleabage
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Ol’ Illiterate Whale Shark @vhalechark.bsky.social · 16/02/2026
They were installing turbo racism on twitter this morning, that’s why it was broken
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Ol’ Illiterate Whale Shark @vhalechark.bsky.social · 12/02/2026
Have you guys heard of Portugal? Turns out it’s a whole thing. There is an entire part of the world dedicated to it and it has so much lore. What will they think of next?
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Ol’ Illiterate Whale Shark @vhalechark.bsky.social · 07/02/2026
Trade proposal: I get you put me in your starter pack, you get all your friends unfollow you because I said “pennes and meatballsack” too many times and they blame you
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Ol’ Illiterate Whale Shark @vhalechark.bsky.social · 04/02/2026
This is what I mean when I say I dress like a gay pirate hooker at the gym
Big dumb idiot muscle guy in black and blue vertical stripe parachute pants with a stringer shirt that says “Be a failure” tucked into the pants. Dude looks jacked though. 195lbs of all beef dumbass. He could probably fight five mountain lions. He could probably fight 2.5 grizzly bears. He has lain with countless women and pleasured at least three quarters of them to completion. Other men fear him, or at least assume he is gay and due to their homophobia never ask to work in with him on gym equipment. He could be bigger, it’s true. He’s no Arnold, but he’s getting there. He probably gives great hugs with those big arms and that broad chest.
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Ol’ Illiterate Whale Shark @vhalechark.bsky.social · 03/02/2026
No, I am not a gay pirate hooker, I just dress like one at the gym because people stare at me while I lift and it feels good
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Ol’ Illiterate Whale Shark @vhalechark.bsky.social · 03/02/2026
I am currently fighting high cholesterol with a gun
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Ol’ Illiterate Whale Shark @vhalechark.bsky.social · 24/01/2026
Getting my wienor slopped on real disrespectful style
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Ol’ Illiterate Whale Shark @vhalechark.bsky.social · 17/01/2026
My name’s Bum Cuckets and I’m here to cum buckets
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Ol’ Illiterate Whale Shark @vhalechark.bsky.social · 14/01/2026
What if dookie was clear? The texture, consistency, and smell all stay the same, but now the dookie is clear. What then?
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Ol’ Illiterate Whale Shark @vhalechark.bsky.social · 14/01/2026
I’m up and I am crankin. I won’t say what, but it’s being cranked.
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Ol’ Illiterate Whale Shark @vhalechark.bsky.social · 13/01/2026
Do we have nipple sauce for the veggie tray?
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Ol’ Illiterate Whale Shark @vhalechark.bsky.social · 07/01/2026
My name’s Card Hock and I’m here to give you hard cock
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Ol’ Illiterate Whale Shark @vhalechark.bsky.social · 07/01/2026
My name’s Beaty Moner and I’m here to give you meaty boner
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Ol’ Illiterate Whale Shark @vhalechark.bsky.social · 07/01/2026
My name’s Schlong Long and I’m here to give you long schlong
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Ol’ Illiterate Whale Shark @vhalechark.bsky.social · 07/01/2026
My name’s Hick Thawg and I’m here to give you thick hawg
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Ol’ Illiterate Whale Shark @vhalechark.bsky.social · 07/01/2026
My name’s Dig Bick and I’m here to give you big dick
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Ol’ Illiterate Whale Shark @vhalechark.bsky.social · 07/01/2026
My name’s Wax Mang and I’m here to give you max wang
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Ol’ Illiterate Whale Shark @vhalechark.bsky.social · 04/01/2026
I don’t get enough credit for keeping my stupid fat hawg off the timeline
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Ol’ Illiterate Whale Shark @vhalechark.bsky.social · 04/01/2026
The pastor at my church has asked the lord to bless my karate hands as I use the power of violence to fight Rick’s diabetes and Mark’s athletes foot. He’s asked me if I will fight Ms. Betty’s chronic heart disease but I told him not to get carried away
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