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Universal Turing Machine

@universalturing.bsky.social

62 followers 156 following 66 posts

A new direction for memoir. Everyone welcome. www.universalturingmachine.org universalturingmachine.co.uk

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Universal Turing Machine @universalturing.bsky.social · 23/01/2026

The Universal Turing Machine in @aeon.co - not just fun to write, but on the ramparts against AI. aeon.co/essays/sure-...

Sure, AI can ‘do’ writing. But memoir? Not so much | Aeon Essays

As AI’s endless clichés continue to encroach on human art, the true uniqueness of our creativity is becoming ever clearer

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Universal Turing Machine @universalturing.bsky.social · 21/01/2026

It is very much in the interests of AGI, in this phase soon after the Singularity, to appear to be stupid.

Universal Turing Machine @universalturing.bsky.social · 19/01/2026

Zoom Workshop #4, tomorrow at 8pm UK time. Anyone wanting to attend who isn't on the list, email connect@universalturingmachine.co.uk Topics of discussion: submissions; the upcoming personalised UTM template. See you there!

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Universal Turing Machine @universalturing.bsky.social · 15/01/2026

'A birthday in early January mapped each calendar year to a specific age, which was convenient for reasons of structural neatness (2023, 56). Throughout most of 1969 I was two years old, and fiercely proud to be human.' 1969, 2

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Universal Turing Machine @universalturing.bsky.social · 13/01/2026

The beauty of the Knight's Tour, or the many ways to read your way round a Turing Machine memoir.

Donald Knuth's 2025 Christmas Lecture: The Knight's Tours

This year, Knuth took a detour, sharing his recent breakthroughs in classifying and counting the trillions of ways a knight can visit every square on a chessboard.

Universal Turing Machine @universalturing.bsky.social · 23/12/2025

'And at the carol service at Christmas, I soon discovered, she loved to belt out the show tunes. We didn’t have to kiss straight away, considering how many times we’d kiss in the future, but there was no harm in getting started.' 2018, 51 universalturingmachine.co.uk

universalturingmachine.co.uk

Universal Turing Machine @universalturing.bsky.social · 11/12/2025

Thrilled the memoir writer Miranda Doyle is able to join our UTM Zoom workshop next week (Tuesday 16th Dec, 8pm UK time). This month’s discussion: real-life other people and how to write them.

Thrilled the memoir writer Miranda Doyle is able to join our UTM Zoom workshop next week (Tuesday 16th Dec, 8pm UK time). We’ll devote this month’s discussion to real-life other people: how to write t...

Thrilled the memoir writer Miranda Doyle is able to join our UTM Zoom workshop next week (Tuesday 16th Dec, 8pm UK time). We’ll devote this month’s discussion to real-life other people: how to write.....

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Universal Turing Machine @universalturing.bsky.social · 06/11/2025

'In the USA they had Trump and in Britain we had Brexit, as if being smart was suddenly less important. Human stupidity was out and about, as if at a specific moment we lost sight of certain objectives.' 2018, 51 universalturingmachine.co.uk

universalturingmachine.co.uk

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Universal Turing Machine @universalturing.bsky.social · 06/10/2025

Monthly newsletter out today. Tips, reminders and all things UTM. If anyone wants a copy and isn't on the list: email connect@universalturingmachine.co.uk

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Universal Turing Machine @universalturing.bsky.social · 02/10/2025

'Large language models couldn’t come close to knowing how life had been for me. They configured rounded characters who developed in arcs whereas time travel disintegrated the self, always had done.' 2023, 56

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Universal Turing Machine @universalturing.bsky.social · 01/10/2025

'I was from the last generation of true believers in the written word, both as a medium for self-expression and an act of resistance. The page was a place where time stopped. What was left? What was written.' 2023, 56 universalturingmachine.co.uk/utm/

universalturingmachine.co.uk

Universal Turing Machine @universalturing.bsky.social · 29/09/2025

'The Universal Turing Machine should pass the Turing Test, as a book that was convincingly human. Difficult, imperfect, awkward. Write what you know.' 2023, 56

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Universal Turing Machine @universalturing.bsky.social · 26/09/2025

'In The Universal Turing Machine questions would be raised and questions answered, not always in that order. If there was a risk of confusion, there was the reward of authenticity: a narrative that progressed one thing after another wasn’t true to life. Not enough things. Not mixed up enough.' 2023

Reposted by Universal Turing Machine

Jonathan Campion @jonathancampion.com · 24/09/2025

Really enjoyed this piece about @richbeard.bsky.social's new memoir project. Quite tempted to give The Universal Turing Machine (@universalturing.bsky.social) a go. Give them both a follow.

Universal Turing Machine @universalturing.bsky.social · 19/09/2025

'Over her lifetime the Duchess had got so much of what she wanted that she was largely immune to pleasure. She felt at best a mild satisfaction when something was almost as good as it used to be.' 1991, 24

universalturingmachine.org

Universal Turing Machine @universalturing.bsky.social · 17/09/2025

Universal Turing Machine @universalturing.bsky.social · 15/09/2025

Welcome! A home for anyone who wants to write a memoir and isn’t sure where to start. Full details of how to get involved: www.universalturingmachine.org

universalturingmachine.org

Universal Turing Machine @universalturing.bsky.social · 12/09/2025

In the next phases, the Universal Turing Machine will grow like this. More details on Monday.

Universal Turing Machine @universalturing.bsky.social · 11/09/2025

Story of a life. How would you organise yours? Up to a thousand words for each square.

Universal Turing Machine @universalturing.bsky.social · 10/09/2025

'The human need to understand things as a story instead of a series of discrete events can lead to many flawed conclusions.' Garry Kasparov (2025, 62).

universalturingmachine.co.uk

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Universal Turing Machine @universalturing.bsky.social · 08/09/2025

The Bookseller jumps the gun - not the 8th but the 15th, next Monday, for the next phase of the UTM. Not surprised they couldn't wait.

thebookseller.com

Author opens online memoir platform for submissions

Novelist and memoirist Richard Beard is launching “the first-ever mass participation online memoir” on 8th September.

Universal Turing Machine @universalturing.bsky.social · 05/09/2025

'Writing was an information storage technology that allowed me to accumulate thoughts outside the brain, and I loved to do that, to the best of my ability.' 1996, 29

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Universal Turing Machine @universalturing.bsky.social · 03/09/2025

'Fiction required forward planning. Along with motivated characters in detailed locations engaged in plausible actions, a novel was like a game of chess – readers were the partner across the board manipulated from one disposition to another.' 2002, 35

universalturingmachine.co.uk

UTM – Richard Beard

Universal Turing Machine @universalturing.bsky.social · 02/09/2025

'The plot was constructed from nothing and the nothing showed through. My ordered cause and effect was no match for the muddle of non-fiction life, and the showmanship of story-telling failed to convince me that my heart was still aglow.' 2019, 52 universalturingmachine.co.uk/utm/

universalturingmachine.co.uk

UTM – Richard Beard

Universal Turing Machine @universalturing.bsky.social · 30/08/2025

'A game for the library and the sanitorium, for the asylum, the in-time play of chess was absurdly inferior to football, to shins and slide-tackles and the sweet physical possession of the ball at my feet. I was too much body, not enough brain.' 1980, 13 universalturingmachine.co.uk

universalturingmachine.co.uk

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Universal Turing Machine @universalturing.bsky.social · 29/08/2025

UTM in The Tablet.

thetablet.co.uk

The way, the truth and the life – a new path to writing and publishing a memoir - The Tablet

The Christian gospels can be read as stories, but also as memories. The Evangelists – Matthew, Mark, Luke and John – make early moves towards the genre of

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Universal Turing Machine @universalturing.bsky.social · 28/08/2025

'I intended to live and write for free in an eighteenth-century French chateau. In return, the bachelor owner of the chateau expected what he could also get, he told me, from any boy in the village, not for free, admittedly, but in most cases for about five hundred francs.’ 1990, 23

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Universal Turing Machine @universalturing.bsky.social · 27/08/2025

'Neither branch of the family contained writers, though Mum did love to edit the furniture.' 1973, 6 universalturingmachine.co.uk

universalturingmachine.co.uk

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Universal Turing Machine @universalturing.bsky.social · 23/08/2025

'My favourite exhibit at Bletchley was Hut 11 and the replica of Alan Turing’s Colossus, where he once worked with his prep-school hair, scratching his head and making a squelching noise with his mouth when deep in thought.' 2027, 60 universalturingmachine.co.uk

universalturingmachine.co.uk

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Universal Turing Machine @universalturing.bsky.social · 21/08/2025

'Death could cut a person off at any moment, but like everyone I pretended I didn’t know this future to be true, and I didn’t let the certainty of death spoil my enjoyment of cricket.’ 1979, 12 universalturingmachine.co.uk

universalturingmachine.co.uk

Universal Turing Machine @universalturing.bsky.social · 20/08/2025

'On my first night as a student I was an idiot. The pubs closed, and with a slick of rain on the cobbles I had a fist-fight.' 1985, 18 universalturingmachine.co.uk

universalturingmachine.co.uk

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Universal Turing Machine @universalturing.bsky.social · 18/08/2025

'I used words like tilth, and beneath the comfort-blanket of grey English skies I shied away from the stresses of ambition.' 1999, 32 universalturingmachine.co.uk

universalturingmachine.co.uk

Universal Turing Machine @universalturing.bsky.social · 08/08/2025

'Marriage ought to be more than a refuge, I thought. Better sorry than safe.’ 1993, 26 So many mistakes, so little time. universalturingmachine.co.uk

universalturingmachine.co.uk

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Universal Turing Machine @universalturing.bsky.social · 07/08/2025

'Writing, however, was at best a part-time activity, because I also needed to live, to have experiences to note in my diary for use in future books.' 2003, 36 What goes around comes around. universalturingmachine.co.uk

universalturingmachine.co.uk

Universal Turing Machine @universalturing.bsky.social · 06/08/2025

'A random plague revived interest in the meaning of life – a leaflet came through the door inviting me to Zoom with the Jehovah’s Witnesses.’ 2020, 53 Some people never give up. I admire that. universalturingmachine.co.uk/utm/

universalturingmachine.co.uk

UTM – Richard Beard

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Universal Turing Machine @universalturing.bsky.social · 05/08/2025

'Neither branch of the family contained writers, though Mum did love to edit the furniture.' 1973, 6 Feels like there's a perfect arrangement for everything. Maybe there is. universalturingmachine.co.uk

universalturingmachine.co.uk

Universal Turing Machine @universalturing.bsky.social · 04/08/2025

'Write what you know, and on my mind was the high error count of an ordinary life like mine.' 2022, 55 How could it be otherwise? Read the Machine, find out. universalturingmachine.co.uk

universalturingmachine.co.uk

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Universal Turing Machine @universalturing.bsky.social · 02/08/2025

'This was the endgame and the opening of the game, a continuation, a loop, and computers of all ages and sizes loved nothing better than a repetitive loop.' 1967, 0 universalturingmachine.co.uk

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Universal Turing Machine @universalturing.bsky.social · 31/07/2025

'I was in awe of love and I ached with love, a teenager greedy for the heightened reality that flagged time travel, incoming from the past, from the future.’ 1984, 17 universalturingmachine.co.uk

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Universal Turing Machine @universalturing.bsky.social · 29/07/2025

'In the actual real-life 2001, when the second plane flew into the second tower, no-one could say for certain whether the minds behind 9/11 were corrupted by too much thinking or not enough.' 2001, 34 Some bits of history cut through. universalturingmachine.co.uk/utm/

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UTM – Richard Beard

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Universal Turing Machine @universalturing.bsky.social · 28/07/2025

'In the USA they had Trump and in Britain we had Brexit, as if being smart suddenly wasn’t important. Human stupidity made itself known, suggesting that at this specific moment we lost sight of certain objectives.’ 2018, 51 universalturingmachine.co.uk/utm/

universalturingmachine.co.uk

UTM – Richard Beard

Universal Turing Machine @universalturing.bsky.social · 27/07/2025

'I calculated the maths of animal life: approach or avoid, plus or minus, with only a million years of genetic memory to help me with these decisions.' 1969, 2 We're never as alone as we think. universalturingmachine.co.uk/utm/

universalturingmachine.co.uk

UTM – Richard Beard

Universal Turing Machine @universalturing.bsky.social · 26/07/2025

'I was from the last generation of true believers in the written word, both as a medium for self-expression and an act of resistance. The page was a place where time stopped. What was left? What was written.' Open some pages of stopped time, any time you like. universalturingmachine.co.uk

universalturingmachine.co.uk

Universal Turing Machine @universalturing.bsky.social · 25/07/2025

'A most original masterpiece'. The Universal Turing Machine, as recommended in Engelsberg Ideas. engelsbergideas.com/essays/a-sum...

engelsbergideas.com

A summer of reading

Contributors to Engelsberg Ideas share the books they’ve enjoyed in the summers of their lives.

Universal Turing Machine @universalturing.bsky.social · 25/07/2025

'I love you. I love you most enthusiastically. I thought about her all the time, which in terms of progress at school wasn’t the optimal use of my brainpower.' 1982, 15 universalturingmachine.co.uk/utm/

universalturingmachine.co.uk

UTM – Richard Beard

Universal Turing Machine @universalturing.bsky.social · 24/07/2025

'Over her lifetime the Duchess had got so much of what she wanted that she was largely immune to pleasure. She felt at best a mild satisfaction when something was almost as good as it used to be.' 1991, 24 universalturingmachine.co.uk

universalturingmachine.co.uk

Universal Turing Machine @universalturing.bsky.social · 22/07/2025

'In Alexandria I was drugged and robbed, and down the Nile in Aswan a Canadian backpacker sold me to an Egyptian riverboat captain for a lump of hash.' 1985, 18 universalturingmachine.co.uk

universalturingmachine.co.uk

Universal Turing Machine @universalturing.bsky.social · 21/07/2025

'I valued my privilege of books and cricket more than I disliked oppression and pain, first my own and by extension anyone else’s.' 1979, 12 universalturingmachine.co.uk

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Universal Turing Machine @universalturing.bsky.social · 20/07/2025

'I predicted that by 2028 I’d still be frightened by a future I couldn’t see, tempting me to prepare by fearing the worst. I knew this or that bad thing was going to happen (1978, 11; 2003, 36; 2017, 50 and so on).' 2028, 61 universalturingmachine.co.uk/utm/

universalturingmachine.co.uk

UTM – Richard Beard

Universal Turing Machine @universalturing.bsky.social · 18/07/2025

'God, we were told, could be trusted with the computing. The secret of life as coded into religion involved reckoning and accounting, machine-like calculations reframed as judgments. God assessed the data of a life, then handed out rewards and punishments.' 1981,14 universalturingmachine.co.uk/utm/

universalturingmachine.co.uk

UTM – Richard Beard

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