iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

I've used every CBT tool in my arsenal to commune with my anxiety. I've grown so effective that I've flipped. Now I convince myself that legitimate negative signals aren't true and that long established patterns of behavior are not actually patterns. They are.

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John Lewis @uneasyrhetoric.net · 10/03/2026

Last night in my French session I forgot the imparfait of être. Completely spaced. For someone approaching B2 level, forgetting the fourth tense you learn (présent, impératif, passé composé, imparfait), is embarrassing and frankly, concerning.

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John Lewis @uneasyrhetoric.net · 05/03/2026

The idea that there is some moral high ground relative to our action in Iran toppling a corrupt fundamentalist regime is laughable at best. Frankly, it is a dangerous fiction meant to hide the fact that they want to do the same to Iran as has been done to Gaza.

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John Lewis @uneasyrhetoric.net · 01/03/2026

I would bet that the regime we put in Khameni's place is just as bad and just as superficially democratic. But hey, pro American.

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John Lewis @uneasyrhetoric.net · 01/03/2026

To be fair to POTUS, he is engaging in an age old American diplomatic system: it is easier to deal with dictators than with democratic govts. Easier to bomb, easier to make trade deals, easier to control. But Trump is about Trump. Not American interests, and certainly not the Iranian people.

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John Lewis @uneasyrhetoric.net · 01/03/2026

Iran's biggest threat to the US: Iran's people are providing a blueprint for all levels of society to resist an evil authoritarian regime. Overthrowing Iran's government is one mob boss taking advantage of the weakness of another.

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John Lewis @uneasyrhetoric.net · 28/02/2026

Humanity has been fighting wars for stupid reasons for millennia. Good to know we haven't changed.

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John Lewis @uneasyrhetoric.net · 28/02/2026

If I were a betting man, and after what I've said about Kalshi lately thre answer is "no"-- I would say Anthropic will find a way to cave to DoD. I hope I am wrong.

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John Lewis @uneasyrhetoric.net · 27/02/2026

Starting to see memes about tax season. I don't mind paying for a government that works. I do mind paying for one that is a nationwide grift and an incredibly poor parody of government.

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John Lewis @uneasyrhetoric.net · 27/02/2026

I read a lot of "leadership" books. I don't expect to find a lot of new ideas, but sometimes old ideas, quoted, resonate in a way they didn't before. Like this one from Stephen Covey: "We judge ourselves by our intentions and others by their behaviors."

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John Lewis @uneasyrhetoric.net · 27/02/2026

And keeping up with the news.

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John Lewis @uneasyrhetoric.net · 27/02/2026

Everything is a chore. Work. Eating. Sleeping. Reading. Studying French. Working out. Meditating. Maintaining friendships. Talking to family. Visiting my mother. Listening to podcasts. Writing. Watching TV. Social Media. Riding my bike. Playing video games. Everything is a chore without reward.

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John Lewis @uneasyrhetoric.net · 21/02/2026

I used to identify as a misanthrope but these AI billionaire fuckwits have made me realize I'm just an introvert. (by comparison)

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John Lewis @uneasyrhetoric.net · 15/02/2026

And refilling the bird feeders is constant right now. The squirrels don't help but the birds are voracious

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John Lewis @uneasyrhetoric.net · 15/02/2026

It's a good question. I've suffered from depression and anxiety for many years (therapy+2 Rx) which I think makes me sensitive to the lack of progress in the world, the lack of empathy, foresight, a long term view. Makes it hard to see a point. Chickadees are awesome!

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John Lewis @uneasyrhetoric.net · 15/02/2026

Feeding the birds. Joking with the barista. My dark humor (especially in light of Trump). I am reading Sartre for my French class and thinking deeply about reading is something I have missed. But mostly the birds. The goldfinches are bright yellow right now.

A bright yellow goldfinch peeks around from behind a cylindrical bird feeder.

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John Lewis @uneasyrhetoric.net · 14/02/2026

When I ask for reading recommendations I should start by reading the room.

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John Lewis @uneasyrhetoric.net · 12/02/2026

This has been a rough week/month. I have managed to keep up appearances for an unusually long period. Quieted my anger, calmed my anxiety, functioned through depression, found little bits of meaning in spite of my nihilism and lack of faith.

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John Lewis @uneasyrhetoric.net · 13/01/2026

I worry about what der orangefarbene Anführer's panic will bring but at the same time, I don't want to discourage any of the actions bringing about the panic.

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John Lewis @uneasyrhetoric.net · 07/01/2026

They want war by any means necessary. These man babies are desperate to play with their toys and shoot people.

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John Lewis @uneasyrhetoric.net · 01/01/2026

Statistics only important to me: I finished 39 books in 2025, 10 from the library, 29 I own. 13 I read on paper, 9 in ebook, and 17 on audio.

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John Lewis @uneasyrhetoric.net · 31/12/2025

This violation of the 1st Commandment...

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John Lewis @uneasyrhetoric.net · 10/12/2025

I am letting my Duolingo streak die out of sheer spite. I find the angry and frozen owl icons insulting. Casse-toi, chouette.

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Reposted by John Lewis

Beth @bethinsac.bsky.social · 01/12/2025

This is the easiest boycott ever. I can not shop at Target forever.

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John Lewis @uneasyrhetoric.net · 01/12/2025

In conflict of interest discussions, perception of conflict can be as bad as actual conflict. Hegseth has that problem: whether he actually gave the "kill them all" order, no one is denying he is capable of such a violation of human rights.

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John Lewis @uneasyrhetoric.net · 29/11/2025

As an American I would agree we have lost our soul, and our damned minds.

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Reposted by John Lewis

TerryBassGuitar🇨🇦 @terrybassguitar.bsky.social · 23/11/2025

Home Depot we see you and we know what you are doing. #HomeDepot

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Reposted by John Lewis

CAKE @thebandcake.bsky.social · 18/11/2025

Are the dozens of survivors with firsthand knowledge of Trump’s possible child rape now in grave danger of being poisoned/suicided/pushed out of a window by Trump/Russia?

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Reposted by John Lewis

Molly Jong-Fast @mollyjongfast.bsky.social · 17/11/2025

I can’t believe how stupid everything is

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John Lewis @uneasyrhetoric.net · 17/11/2025

I used to call myself an agnostic. But I've started saying that I am an atheist because, while I firmly believe that if the extent of knowledge in the universe were a beach, we still don't understand one grain of sand, I don't really believe in a theistic concept. There may be more, or not.

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Reposted by John Lewis

Beth @bethinsac.bsky.social · 17/11/2025

For the record I am EXTREMELY EXCITED about the holidays but Starbucks and Target can fuck off forever.

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John Lewis @uneasyrhetoric.net · 16/11/2025

I don't care how why or if she found redemption. We need everything we can use to stop all of this. We can sort it out later.

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John Lewis @uneasyrhetoric.net · 16/11/2025

Ok, you got me. This game is crazy.

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John Lewis @uneasyrhetoric.net · 15/11/2025

This is a weird thing for an introvert to say, but I talk too much

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John Lewis @uneasyrhetoric.net · 14/11/2025

Probably a good time to remember that Venezuela has oil

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John Lewis @uneasyrhetoric.net · 07/11/2025

A friend of mine is an Air Traffic Controller. He has to work, but now he also has to get a part time job to pay the bills.

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John Lewis @uneasyrhetoric.net · 07/11/2025

Just saw a recruiting ad for the Butte County Sheriff's office. One of the two deputies in the ad was...a woman! Is this decidedly rural, poor, county of small towns (and Chico) woke? Gasp. No shade on Butte, plenty of shade on the redhats.

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John Lewis @uneasyrhetoric.net · 28/10/2025

Close game in basketball, hockey, soccer = exciting! Close game in football = exciting (high scoring) or boring (defensive shutdown). Close game in baseball = why can't this just end already!

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John Lewis @uneasyrhetoric.net · 28/10/2025

I just got online to check the World Series score and ... The game is still going?! (Haven't paid much attention)

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John Lewis @uneasyrhetoric.net · 25/10/2025

My dentist's office hopes I "enjoyed" my visit. I mean, my dentist is terrific but I think best I can do is tolerate a visit.

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