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Tristan Schorn

@tristanschorn.bsky.social
1.8K followers 4.4K following 33 posts

He/him. I resemble everything the conservatives want. But I'm as far from a conservative as you can get.

PostsRepliesMedia
Tristan Schorn @tristanschorn.bsky.social · 20/04/2026
I finally get the One Piece obsession (admittedly I've only seen the Netflix L.A. version, but it was great!)
media.tenor.com
a statue of a goat on a boat with a skull and crossbones flag on the sail
Alt: a statue of a goat on a boat with a skull and crossbones flag on the sail
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Tristan Schorn @tristanschorn.bsky.social · 13/04/2026
Visiting Seoul and Busan next month. Any recs for activities with a 5 yo and a 2 yo?
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Tristan Schorn @tristanschorn.bsky.social · 30/03/2026
I set up an install of OpenMediaVault, and installed Immich via docker yesterday. Pretty happy with Immich as a Google photos replacement! I thought that was going to be the hardest part of degoogling but not too bad!
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Tristan Schorn @tristanschorn.bsky.social · 18/03/2026
Marketplace is asking me to provide government ID to keep listing items. No power in the 'verse could get me to provide Meta with my ID.
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Tristan Schorn @tristanschorn.bsky.social · 17/03/2026
Wikipedia is peak internet. Decentralized, non-extractive, and actually useful!
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Tristan Schorn @tristanschorn.bsky.social · 05/01/2026
Do you want a nice watch, outside of the options provided by the Google's and Apple's of the world? This is what you want!
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Tristan Schorn @tristanschorn.bsky.social · 27/01/2025
Thoughts after about 1 month's ownership: - VW's Travel Assist (semi-self driving) is magical - Drove to Banff from Calgary and back. Range anxiety is mostly none existent, and a decent amount of chargers exists - A family friendly SUV has no right to accelerate this fast, but I love it
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Tristan Schorn @tristanschorn.bsky.social · 23/01/2025
My prediction for the next four years: Suffering will be maximum, and those who have already suffered the most will see their suffering increase the most. The universe seems to have an innate sense of irony, so I suspect the average suffering will increase by a greater degree for those who
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Explicitly Anti-Vaxx @bellamyj.blacksky.app · 15/01/2025
I was considering Proton mail. I am considering it no longer.
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Tristan Schorn @tristanschorn.bsky.social · 06/01/2025
We bought a Volkswagen ID.4 to replace my clunker. It's pretty great, still getting the hang of it. What you need to know about this decision and brand choice is that if this were maybe 5 years ago, I guarantee this would have been a Tesla. I was the biggest fanboy of that brand you could find.
Picture of a new VW ID.4
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David Mack @davidmackau.bsky.social · 19/12/2024
the feds: stop trying to turn this guy into some cool antihero with a badass public image also the feds: *treat him like they’ve captured the joker*
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Tristan Schorn @tristanschorn.bsky.social · 10/12/2024
Conservatives are traitors.
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Matt Novak @paleofuture.bsky.social · 06/12/2024
This is the video that got nuked from TikTok
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Tristan Schorn @tristanschorn.bsky.social · 05/12/2024
Do something that makes you feel this happy today!
Smiling man in a coat happy with something he accomplished recently. He's all over the news today for some reason. He must have done something to make the world a better place.
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Tristan Schorn @tristanschorn.bsky.social · 05/12/2024
Remember, if you see the UnitedHealthcare CEO's killer on the loose, No you didn't.
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Tristan Schorn @tristanschorn.bsky.social · 03/12/2024
The comic strips depict a laptop waking up from a long sleep. It's initially confused, but then realizes it has been asleep for years and it is way behind on updates. 

The owner realizes the file they are looking for isn't on this laptop. As they begin to close the laptop, the laptop protests at its impending new slumber, not knowing how long it will be asleep for this time.
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Tristan Schorn @tristanschorn.bsky.social · 03/12/2024
This is a humorous meme that plays on the contrast between the natural defense mechanisms of plants and human behavior.
Here's a breakdown of the meme:

Top Text:
 * "Plant: evolves pungent taste for the specific purpose of not getting eaten" - This is a factual statement about how some plants develop strong flavors or odors to deter herbivores. Examples shown are parsley root, garlic, and chili peppers.

Bottom Text:
 * "Humans: joke's on you i'm into that shit" - This line, accompanied by a picture of Skeletor, a villain known for his love of evil, suggests that humans enjoy the very flavors that plants evolved to avoid being eaten. It's a humorous way of pointing out our unique culinary preferences.

Overall Meaning:
The meme humorously highlights how humans have developed a taste for foods that other animals might find unpleasant or even toxic. It plays on the idea that humans are an exception to the rule, enjoying flavors that plants specifically evolved to avoid being eaten.
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Tristan Schorn @tristanschorn.bsky.social · 02/12/2024
Sex is hardware. Gender is software. Window machines running Max OS exist. Mac's running Windows exist. Linux in all its flavours exists. This is how I've always thought about it.
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Tristan Schorn @tristanschorn.bsky.social · 29/11/2024
The image you sent is a meme featuring a collage of four photos of sharks with human-like teeth. The caption at the top reads, "Look at our teeth, we're carnivores."

This image is meant for discussions about vegetarianism and veganism. It points out the ridiculousness of pro-meat eating arguments that make reference to human canine teeth, since teeth much more suitable to meat eating exist in other animals.
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Tristan Schorn @tristanschorn.bsky.social · 28/11/2024
The image appears to be a photo of an extremely bare living room. The room has a large TV, a floor lamp, a folding chair, and a window with blinds.
The text on the image says "Men live like this and see nothing wrong." This suggests that the image is meant to be humorous and poke fun at men's living habits.
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Tristan Schorn @tristanschorn.bsky.social · 27/11/2024
I'm going to start posting my meme and comic collection here occasionally. I'm going to use AI to provide my alt text. It did a pretty good job this time!
The image is a modified XKCDcomic strip that satirizes the inefficiency of government agencies. It shows two stick figures excitedly discussing the need to create a new government agency to address the problem of inefficient government agencies. However, the punchline reveals that the creation of the new agency only exacerbates the problem, making the government even more inefficient.
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BrooklynDad_Defiant! @mmpadellan.bsky.social · 26/11/2024
Republican Jesus. From the Book of MAGA.
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No Fuqs To Give @respectoakland.bsky.social · 18/11/2024
Uncommitted Voters Plead to Democrats for Help, by Reese Waters youtu.be/rlOyU0SP9HI?...
youtu.be
Uncommitted Voters Plead to Democrats for Help
YouTube video by Reese Waters
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God @thegodshow.com · 23/11/2024
Someone called this mass exodus from Twitter ‘the fall of the Broman Empire’ and I died laughing. 💀
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