iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

marlena @tinynewbornbaby.bsky.social · 22/03/2026

Pros to inviting me to your party: -under the exact right conditions I will try to convince people that cats are aliens -former bartender Cons: -under the exact wrong conditions I will talk about how I stated getting Botox in my early 20s which some people find a real bummer

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marlena @tinynewbornbaby.bsky.social · 22/03/2026

Sometimes my iPhone will be like “here’s a slideshow of photos of you and your best friend in Italy” and sometimes it’ll be like “remember when your cat got ringworm?? Here’s 30 pictures of it!”

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marlena @tinynewbornbaby.bsky.social · 22/03/2026

Brought my friend to a party where we were (likely) the oldest people there. Instead of doing our best to fit in, we invented drink called Pepis Hot Sauce (disgusting) and forced other guests to drink it. The ingredients are 1 part Jim beam, one part salsa water, and hot sauce.

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marlena @tinynewbornbaby.bsky.social · 21/03/2026

It’s been oops all bangers in the book department over here lately and I fear my sleep schedule is being negatively affected.

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marlena @tinynewbornbaby.bsky.social · 17/03/2026

Bad news everyone, the sun is out and I’ve decided to once again turn evil for the summer.

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marlena @tinynewbornbaby.bsky.social · 13/03/2026

Mogging the other cars in the Costco parking lot with my Alfa Romeo

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marlena @tinynewbornbaby.bsky.social · 12/03/2026

Nooo don’t randomly start hating your dinner you made sooo much so you’d have leftovers aha

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marlena @tinynewbornbaby.bsky.social · 09/03/2026

Getting ready for bed while my cats move around me with the urgency of on duty EMTs

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marlena @tinynewbornbaby.bsky.social · 07/03/2026

I’m in so much trouble (took him to the vet for bloodwork)

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marlena @tinynewbornbaby.bsky.social · 07/03/2026

Was outside with my cat on a leash and this guy walks by and goes “oh my god, you only have one eye!” Which I found really baffling until I remembered that, unlike me, most people don’t see a one eyed cat literally every day.

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marlena @tinynewbornbaby.bsky.social · 06/03/2026

I was told by multiple people that I read too much last year and, while I do think there’s no such thing as reading too much, I did actually start and finish two full books today. It isn’t impossible that there is something wrong with me.

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marlena @tinynewbornbaby.bsky.social · 06/03/2026

Using the pre-vet paperwork to talk about my cats more than necessary. Typical behavior at the vet: cooperative, brave, kind. Additional information: he has the heart of a poet, he’s very woke, he knows nothing but love despite the pain he’s experienced.

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marlena @tinynewbornbaby.bsky.social · 28/02/2026

Imagine hating me and I’m just painting cockroaches on the dress I’m planning on wearing tomorrow

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marlena @tinynewbornbaby.bsky.social · 27/02/2026

Someone asked me what my “deal” was today and I listed some bullshit about my career and hobbies and now I’m so annoyed I didn’t say something weirder like “I’m a poet, a dreamer, a 3rd gen German American, a survivor of congenital heart disease, a lover, a friend, a daughter”

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marlena @tinynewbornbaby.bsky.social · 26/02/2026

There should be a Letterboxd for beverage enjoyers like me. I would like to rate a carbonated beverage and see how my fellow beverage enjoyers have also rated it.

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marlena @tinynewbornbaby.bsky.social · 26/02/2026

My next door neighbor (cool and hot) just witnessed me hunched over, no makeup bad skin, gel cast in hair. It’s so over for me.

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marlena @tinynewbornbaby.bsky.social · 26/02/2026

Starting to think that maybe monkeys are, like outer space and Sabrina Carpenter, none of my business

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marlena @tinynewbornbaby.bsky.social · 26/02/2026

The first person to cook and eat an artichoke… you’re a freak but I respect the hell outta you

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marlena @tinynewbornbaby.bsky.social · 25/02/2026

Men love to be like “I’ve never hit a woman but…”

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marlena @tinynewbornbaby.bsky.social · 21/02/2026

Punch the monkey is legitimately more than I can handle. I don’t care if the other monkeys are accepting him now. It’s too much!! He’s too much!! I cannot be brought to tears multiple times in one day by a monkey.

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marlena @tinynewbornbaby.bsky.social · 13/02/2026

How’s my day going? Vet just emailed me “I followed up with Ottoman’s vet and a warm face isn’t really a symptom or something to be worried about”

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marlena @tinynewbornbaby.bsky.social · 13/02/2026

People will name their playlist “soul crushing mix” and the songs are all describing the exact pattern of emotions I experience on a random Thursday.

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marlena @tinynewbornbaby.bsky.social · 12/02/2026

I’m like “damn this playlist is banger after banger” and the playlist is just This Is The Smiths on Spotify

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marlena @tinynewbornbaby.bsky.social · 11/02/2026

Looking for an irl vampire to start hanging out with. I’m talking really sinister vibes, only seen at night, weird outdated outfits, something deeply off about them.

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marlena @tinynewbornbaby.bsky.social · 06/02/2026

Just went to the bathroom in the middle of the night (something I never do) and one of my cats was in there standing on two legs trying to open a drawer and looking just as stunned to see me as I was to see him. Likes two ships passing I figured it was his business and let him be

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marlena @tinynewbornbaby.bsky.social · 04/02/2026

Saying “okay Epstein” to an old man hitting on me at the gas station despite the fact that I am actually like 30 years old

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marlena @tinynewbornbaby.bsky.social · 30/01/2026

Currently Little Match Girl maxxing (can’t do anything right and I’m probably dying)

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marlena @tinynewbornbaby.bsky.social · 28/01/2026

Last week my face hurt because of Botox. This week it hurts from accidentally cutting my eyebrow while shaving it. Life is never ending agony in the pursuit of beauty.

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marlena @tinynewbornbaby.bsky.social · 27/01/2026

Just had a sandwich with potato chips and a Coke Zero for lunch. Gotta love the classics. Might fuck around and have some milk and cookies later.

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marlena @tinynewbornbaby.bsky.social · 26/01/2026

Putting my beverage in the freezer to get it extra cold just to carry it around the house for 4-5 hours before finally consuming it at room temperature.

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marlena @tinynewbornbaby.bsky.social · 18/01/2026

I apologize in advance to anyone who has to see my outfit tonight. My brother got more attention than me growing up and now I am the way that I am.

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marlena @tinynewbornbaby.bsky.social · 13/01/2026

Me and my next door neighbor are both doing our laundry today when usually we both do it on Sundays. I can hear her dryer running through the wall. I feel so connected to her :)

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marlena @tinynewbornbaby.bsky.social · 01/12/2025

Friend group is doing a holiday book exchange with the prompt “bring one of your favorite books that you don’t think anyone else has read”. Dare me to bring infinite jest lol

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marlena @tinynewbornbaby.bsky.social · 22/11/2025

I don’t like who I am when there are candy cane Hersheys kisses nearby

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marlena @tinynewbornbaby.bsky.social · 21/11/2025

“I’m on my period and this made me cry” I haven’t had a period in years and I can bring myself to tears only by considering the concept of a lamb. Fake ass crybaby, some of us are built different.

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marlena @tinynewbornbaby.bsky.social · 16/11/2025

Two people at my bookclub started flirting, baby I cut in there and immediately started talking about my cats. There will be NO FLIRTING in this bookclub!!

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marlena @tinynewbornbaby.bsky.social · 14/11/2025

My life is so fucking weird, I’ve just received word from a woman I’ve never met in Japan (a friend of my mom’s friend) that she received a message from my cat last night that she needed to pass on to me

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marlena @tinynewbornbaby.bsky.social · 29/10/2025

Idk how people with normie names do it bro I’m watching cloverfield and every time they say my name I startle

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marlena @tinynewbornbaby.bsky.social · 25/10/2025

Get unready with me to try not to want to kill myself tomorrow 🙂🙂🙂 get unready with my to try to feel normal about my behavior tonight 🙂🙂 get unready with my to try to prevent the overwhelming ennui tomorrow

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marlena @tinynewbornbaby.bsky.social · 17/10/2025

Fall’s here so I can finally start water based cooking again

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marlena @tinynewbornbaby.bsky.social · 16/10/2025

The most important thing about running that nobody tells you is that you should always spend the first 15 minutes of every run thinking about how much you don’t want to do this and you hate running and you wish you were dead.

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marlena @tinynewbornbaby.bsky.social · 15/10/2025

A dog will violate your boundaries in all the obvious ways but a cat will violate your boundaries in ways you can’t even imagine. Why are you trying to look in the toilet WHILE I’m peeing???

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marlena @tinynewbornbaby.bsky.social · 14/10/2025

Thrilled to announce that the slightly enlarged pore on my forehead?? Well I’ve spent all night touching and picking at it and with any luck by tomorrow morning it will be a full blown painful zit! Noticeable in all my meetings!

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marlena @tinynewbornbaby.bsky.social · 08/10/2025

I love when I wake up covered in sweat. What was I up to???

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marlena @tinynewbornbaby.bsky.social · 03/10/2025

Didn’t get any fall desserts at the grocery store today like a fucking idiot and now that it’s officially snack o’clock in my home it looks like I have to kill myself

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marlena @tinynewbornbaby.bsky.social · 01/10/2025

I need to get two more Halloween events on the calendar because right now both Halloween parties I have planned are vampire themed (year of the vampyre baby) but I have two really good non vampire costume ideas!

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marlena @tinynewbornbaby.bsky.social · 01/10/2025

A few years ago I started throwing a little sipping chocolate in the night beverage rotation and here’s what I’ll say: why is a hot chocolate a full meal. Why do I get soup belly from a hot chocolate. Why am I so stuffed right now couldn’t possibly eat another bite.

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marlena @tinynewbornbaby.bsky.social · 29/09/2025

At a real low point in life right now and I just said (out loud) (about marble run race video accounts) “yeah I don’t really like this one, there’s too many funnels, it makes it too luck based so there’s no skill and no finesse”

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marlena @tinynewbornbaby.bsky.social · 26/09/2025

3 bites of post dessert soup eating straight out of the pot still on the stove hits so much harder than that same soup served for dinner. I can’t explain it.

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