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jennifer

@themissjenn.bsky.social
172 followers 66 following 252 posts

aspiring NFL coach.

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jennifer @themissjenn.bsky.social · 03/10/2026
I can tell I’m old now because I am worried about the gophers breaking the little brown jug.
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jennifer @themissjenn.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
This Vikings game aged me 40 years.
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jennifer @themissjenn.bsky.social · 14/09/2026
I’ve always believed in this team.
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jennifer @themissjenn.bsky.social · 13/09/2026
Well the Vikings game couldn’t be going any worse.
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jennifer @themissjenn.bsky.social · 13/09/2026
In May I was diagnosed with severe carnitine deficiency and couldn't even jog for 5 min without stopping.Today I ran a half marathon. 🥹
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jennifer @themissjenn.bsky.social · 10/09/2026
I’ve been waiting all day for Wednesday night.
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jennifer @themissjenn.bsky.social · 19/07/2026
What if no one wins the World Cup.
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jennifer @themissjenn.bsky.social · 18/07/2026
The wildfire smoke finally cleared from Minneapolis so we can breathe outside again. Boomer neighbors: time to burn yard waste all weekend!
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jennifer @themissjenn.bsky.social · 07/07/2026
Watching my first soccer game. Reminds me of watching the Vikings.
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Starfire’s Deranged Neocon Foreign Policy Podcast @irhottakes.bsky.social · 20/06/2026
I’m not too embarrassed that we are losing to Iran. It’s a big boy country with missiles and drones and so forth ran by stone cold killers. That’s NFL ball for you. I am a little embarrassed we are also losing to algae.
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jennifer @themissjenn.bsky.social · 18/06/2026
There was a live bee in my bagged salad, so I called Target to report it. “Was anyone injured?” “Yes, the bee is now dead”. 💀
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jennifer @themissjenn.bsky.social · 15/06/2026
Last night at 2am the power went out and I just happened to be awake and notice and got up to look around, only to find the power wire down and my tree on fire. So now I’m never going to sleep again, new anxiety unlocked.
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jennifer @themissjenn.bsky.social · 11/05/2026
That was very Tonya Harding.
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jennifer @themissjenn.bsky.social · 11/05/2026
Should I emotionally invest in the timberwolves.
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jennifer @themissjenn.bsky.social · 21/04/2026
Chronic illness is fun because not only are you slowly dying, everyone also stops talking to you because no one wants to hear about it. 🥲
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Nicholas Grossman @nicholasgrossman.bsky.social · 07/04/2026
Millions of American voters wanted to be villains. They came to believe it’s the key to success, while goodness is weak, woke, loser stuff, done only to signal. Offered the option of unvarnished villainy, they enthusiastically took it. Seeing others suffer more made them feel big. And here we are.
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jennifer @themissjenn.bsky.social · 19/02/2026
I love ice skating we should all be ice skating.
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jennifer @themissjenn.bsky.social · 17/02/2026
When the broadcasters say a triple lutz is like the last mile of a marathon and you have the niche expertise that it isn’t true.
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jennifer @themissjenn.bsky.social · 13/02/2026
That’s the thing about figure skating. Ice is slippery sometimes.
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jennifer @themissjenn.bsky.social · 09/02/2026
It’s wild the Facebook ragers thought that was the worst halftime show they’ve ever seen, but simultaneously didn’t watch it.
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jennifer @themissjenn.bsky.social · 08/02/2026
Is it just me or does the Super Bowl not hit the same when you’re dead inside (a Vikings fan).
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jennifer @themissjenn.bsky.social · 07/02/2026
Is it just me or does the Olympic opening ceremony not hit the same when you’re dead inside.
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Meredith Shiner @meredithshiner.com · 07/02/2026
JD Vance ruins everything
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jennifer @themissjenn.bsky.social · 07/02/2026
I feel like I could’ve been a speed skater.
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jennifer @themissjenn.bsky.social · 06/02/2026
I think the hardest part of *this* is seeing how many people applaud the harm of others in their community. There are so many good people here but it’s sobering to see the horrible side of humanity so clearly.
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Elle Ess @viamarsala18.bsky.social · 28/01/2026
Honestly the longer ICE stays here the more advantage we gain. They have to be gone by spring. If the bike whackos get a shot at patrol it’s OVER.
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jennifer @themissjenn.bsky.social · 24/01/2026
Minneapolis based runners posting smiling selfies from their runs today like are we on the same planet right now?????
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jennifer @themissjenn.bsky.social · 24/01/2026
You know they’re out for revenge because of the march yesterday.
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xtina @xtina1229.bsky.social · 24/01/2026
FUCK ICE THE FUCKING INCOMPETENT FUCKING NAZI FUCKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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jennifer @themissjenn.bsky.social · 19/01/2026
We’ve reached the point of crisis in MN where everyone’s posting their random aesthetic slideshows of the state on instagram.
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xtina @xtina1229.bsky.social · 17/01/2026
I drive on frozen water on the ground every day
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jennifer @themissjenn.bsky.social · 16/01/2026
Instagram is wild right now because half of it is people posting themselves in 2016 and the rest is content from the civil war happening in Minneapolis.
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Ellsey @ellsey.bsky.social · 08/01/2026
stop what you're doing and let Amber Glenn take you to church #USPrevagenChamps #figureskating
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jennifer @themissjenn.bsky.social · 11/01/2026
Girl next to me on the plane left her AirPods in the seat pocket, but during the flight she pulled up a video of protestors being pepper sprayed and had a good laugh with her husband, so I followed her lead on how to be a neighbor. 🫡
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jennifer @themissjenn.bsky.social · 04/01/2026
I’ve never thrown a football in my life but I’m confident I could play quarterback better than Max Brosmer.
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jennifer @themissjenn.bsky.social · 03/01/2026
Rest assured, CBS is rushing a crew to Boise to interview anyone they can find on the street about international law.
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jennifer @themissjenn.bsky.social · 31/12/2025
Highest mileage year ever despite a blood disorder diagnoses that kept me out of running for a month and finishing the year with broken rib. Here’s to a healthy 2026. 🩷
Strava yearly maintenance total of 1,975 mi.
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jennifer @themissjenn.bsky.social · 25/12/2025
That halftime show felt like the dreams I have when I take antihistamines before bed.
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jennifer @themissjenn.bsky.social · 25/12/2025
Putting the MVC in the throwback costumes and not the ice ones is criminal.
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jennifer @themissjenn.bsky.social · 25/12/2025
Peak Minnesotan is thinking the wind is blowing through my window every time Netflix plays the wind blowing noise during the broadcast.
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jennifer @themissjenn.bsky.social · 25/12/2025
What’s going to be more painful: this Vikings game or my broken rib?
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jennifer @themissjenn.bsky.social · 15/12/2025
Off to a good start.
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jennifer @themissjenn.bsky.social · 15/12/2025
Vikings in prime time? I don’t see any way this could go wrong in any way!
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CITIUS MAG @citiusmag.com · 07/12/2025
The field for the 2028 U.S. Olympic Marathon Trials just got a little bit bigger thanks to the California International Marathon. 55 women ran under the qualifying standard of 2:37:00‼️
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jennifer @themissjenn.bsky.social · 30/11/2025
The Minnesota Vikings are wasting my prime.
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jennifer @themissjenn.bsky.social · 28/11/2025
My 6yo nephew said the turkey was dry and started choking and I asked if he knew the Heimlich maneuver. He goes “yeah.. in the name of the father, son, and Holy Spirit”. Close enough.
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jennifer @themissjenn.bsky.social · 13/11/2025
Who needs northern lights when your boomer neighbors think they need to light the neighborhood with 40,000,000,000 lumen LED lights any time it’s dark outside.
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jennifer @themissjenn.bsky.social · 09/11/2025
I got new tires today and they were like “oh you NEED new wiper blades yours are streaking” and I was like no they aren’t? And refused. Dear reader, there was a leaf stuck in the blade. 🙃
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jennifer @themissjenn.bsky.social · 06/11/2025
Today I was helping my 6yo nephew with homework and he was like “I’m not very good with reading comprehension” and I was like “don’t worry most of America isn’t either”.
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jennifer @themissjenn.bsky.social · 02/11/2025
Nanana boo boo we beat the lions. 👾
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