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The False Nine

@thefalsenine.bsky.social
685 followers 95 following 1.8K posts

Purveyors of interesting nonsense. DM for inquiries or story pitch ideas. Texia est viridis! 🐔 thefalse9texas.com

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Reposted by The False Nine
Jay Nolan @jdenver.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
Didn’t like that we won’t make the playoffs, but I’ve assumed that for a while. Didn’t like the folks who were kicked out for wearing ABOLISH ICE shirts. Liked that it was a fun game. Love that this part of the season isn’t as demoralizing as the end of 2023.
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Agzywagzy 🇵🇸 @agzywagzy.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
I liked the Folklorico dancers. I did not like the ICE agents inside Q2.
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The False Nine @thefalsenine.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
Admin is asleep so re-posting: It seems that “Abolish ICE” is against the MLS Code of fan Conduct and #Austinfc are removing people wearing that on shirts. Not a good look for the club or MLS. Also, Abolish ICE
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Josh Busby @busbyj2.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
After that dumpster fire of first half of second half, the comeback was nice. Good to see BV score, Ramirez so cool and composed. Tie was a win sort of.
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picklerick1138.bsky.social @picklerick1138.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
Not going to give them any flowers for salvaging a point at home when 3 was needed.
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Tim Thompson @timothompson.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
Liked: - As you said, BV finally scored a goal. - Ervin Torres - Cristian Ramirez - The comeback. Disliked - Missing Stuver. - The back line at the beginning of the second half. - The 😬 after the third goal. - Another draw when we needed a win.
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Scott Specht @scottaspecht.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
This was a great result for the LA Galaxy.
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The False Nine @thefalsenine.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
Austin FC comes back from 3-0 down to earn a point. What did you like? What didn’t you like? Admin starts: it’s great to see Vazquez back on the scoresheet.
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The False Nine @thefalsenine.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
The craziness is akin to a St Lousian saying “I prefer a nice Lou Malnati’s to Imo’s.”
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The False Nine @thefalsenine.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
Tonight has been one of the MLS-iest of MLS matches that have ever happened
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The False Nine @thefalsenine.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
Chaos is beautiful
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The False Nine @thefalsenine.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
The few thousand fans who stayed are taking in some beautiful chaos
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The False Nine @thefalsenine.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
Poor GK positioning there
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The False Nine @thefalsenine.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
NEVER A DOUBT!!!
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The False Nine @thefalsenine.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
NEVER A DOUBT!!
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The False Nine @thefalsenine.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
NEVER A DOUBT!
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The False Nine @thefalsenine.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
Jim Curtin rn
static.klipy.com
Steve Buscemi's Confused Stare
ALT: Steve Buscemi's Confused Stare
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The False Nine @thefalsenine.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
Bell’s having a howler
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The False Nine @thefalsenine.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
ALWAYS A DOUBT!!!
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The False Nine @thefalsenine.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
ALWAYS A DOUBT!!
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The False Nine @thefalsenine.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
Q2 iS a FoRTreSs
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The False Nine @thefalsenine.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
ALWAYS A DOUBT!
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The False Nine @thefalsenine.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
First half thoughts: -Austin defense doing a great job on the San Diego DPs up front; -Need to get Ervin on the ball more; -This looks like a match between teams that aren’t currently in the playoffs.
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The False Nine @thefalsenine.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
Oh no. Hamstring. The worst
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The False Nine @thefalsenine.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
To anyone wishing we’d “keep politics out of sport”: 1. No 2. You know nothing about the history of this sport
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The False Nine @thefalsenine.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
Immigration law in late 19th-early 20th c. America was essentially: make it here, don’t actively present a disease, come on in. Remind those who say “My family did it legally 100 years ago” of this fact.
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The False Nine @thefalsenine.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
Chat GPT and online betting platforms are a scourge on society
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The False Nine @thefalsenine.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
The US is made better by immigrants. Always has. Always will.
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The False Nine @thefalsenine.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
Legal question, @lsepper.bsky.social: do 1A rights end when entering an athletic event? As far as admin remembers, Q2 is owned by the city, thus a public premises At what point are individual rights able to be abridged?
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The False Nine @thefalsenine.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
All our best friends listen to the alternate audio and Lincoln Rose.
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The False Nine @thefalsenine.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
Tonight Austin FC take on San Diego FC at Q2 with both sides missing a number of players. What do we predict?
static.klipy.com
Bill Hader: In a Word, Chaos
Alt: Bill Hader: In a Word, Chaos
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The False Nine @thefalsenine.bsky.social · 27/09/2026
The chickens foresee absolute chaos tonight Good Guys 2-2 Silver Sphincters
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Bernadette COYS @bdejoya.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
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Tom Grochowicz @tom.grochowi.cz · 20/09/2026
I like that we've advanced enough in the table to go from embarrassing to simply disappointing.
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picklerick1138.bsky.social @picklerick1138.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
The paint drying on my neighbor's house would have been more exciting. Played for a draw, got a draw. But draws aren't going to get them a playoff spot.
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Tim Thompson @timothompson.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
Liked - Still unbeaten for 7 games. Moved up in table. - Brad Stuver wasn’t busy until late, but showed up when needed. Disliked - Brandon Vazquez needs a PK or something. He still is not 100%. - Will be missing a lot of players for upcoming games due to cards and international duty.
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The False Nine @thefalsenine.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
Austin FC draws FC Dallas in an active construction zone. What did you like? What didn’t you like? Admin starts: Bunny!!
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Liz Sepper @lsepper.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
We didnt lose so that is good on the not losing front
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ATX is Verde @atxisverde.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
Every time I see that 3 back with one natural center back I think we are gonna get beaten up but they keep holding strong, regardless of who is in there.
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The False Nine @thefalsenine.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
Kinda like a beige match. Nothing great. Nothing bad Your thoughts?
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The False Nine @thefalsenine.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
That match was as pleasant as a wet fart in an elevator
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The False Nine @thefalsenine.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
.26 xG seems about right. 😔
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The False Nine @thefalsenine.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
Austin loves to get into the half spaces near the box What they don’t do, though, is engage a defender to pull him out of place.
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The False Nine @thefalsenine.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
First rule of taking corners: you must beat the first defender And we don’t
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The False Nine @thefalsenine.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
Admin is thinking of Texas Soccer former coach, Chris Petrucelli: “Never pass on an opportunity to head the ball.”
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The False Nine @thefalsenine.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
Admin once had a rabbit stew in Rome. Was a sublime experience
static.klipy.com
Chefs Kiss French Chef
ALT: Chefs Kiss French Chef
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The False Nine @thefalsenine.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
The Latin word for rabbit is “cuniculus.”
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The False Nine @thefalsenine.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
The supercilious nature of attackers is normally a good thing. Not so much there.
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The False Nine @thefalsenine.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
Unlike most MLS teams, Austin waits until the 63’ to play their DPs
static.klipy.com
Think Smart Meme
ALT: Think Smart Meme
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CJ Fogler @cjzero.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
S/O to the drummer in the "Apparently, I Like Soccer" shirt
2 men dressed as old time military/pirate garb flanking a man in the noted shirt
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