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The Caretaker

@the-caretaker.bsky.social
208 followers 99 following 805 posts

Thedas' best and only Uber driver. NOT to be confused with professional WWE wrestler "The Undertaker". ___ DArp & 18+. Mainly shitposts but I can be gently coaxed into Semi-serious stuff.

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The Caretaker @the-caretaker.bsky.social · 12/01/2026
Every Age has a finite end. This too shall pass, Dweller. Yet we do not have to endure it passively.
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The Caretaker @the-caretaker.bsky.social · 04/12/2025
Winter has since swept throughout Thedas proper, but the best has yet to come: Festive hams and pies... and burning logs that put off toxic smoke.
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The Caretaker @the-caretaker.bsky.social · 10/09/2025
Life is cyclical, Dweller. Nothing is permanent. The seasons end but begin anew, and so to shall friendships and bonds be strengthened as we come together once more.
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The Caretaker @the-caretaker.bsky.social · 27/07/2025
Dweller, I know not what labubu means. The winds caution against learning its meaning.
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Maphel NSFW🔞 @maphel.bsky.social · 17/07/2025
I'm opening two slots for Colored Commissions this month. As a thank you for 200 followers, Second characters are free! To streamline contact, I've whipped up a handy dandy google form for those who are interested: forms.gle/NMkqnjfrsNdx... TOS & Other information will be in the replies below 👇
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The Caretaker @the-caretaker.bsky.social · 28/06/2025
Watch the musical "Rent" during Pride Month and take 5000 damage, Dweller. It's good for character development.
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The Caretaker @the-caretaker.bsky.social · 25/06/2025
Are we being gay enough this Pride Month, Dweller?
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SPITE. @spitefully.bsky.social · 15/06/2025
NO. KINGS.
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The Caretaker @the-caretaker.bsky.social · 20/05/2025
Take this, Dweller. You will need it on your journey. [ They offer up a single plate of Birria tacos]
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The Caretaker @the-caretaker.bsky.social · 28/12/2024
I catch you in my loving arms. Then I swaddle you and return you to the land. You do not remember any of this because of the trauma of falling thousands of meters through endless space. A real doozy.
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Maphel NSFW🔞 @maphel.bsky.social · 25/04/2025
WHEW. The horrors persist. Opening an emergency slot for an Icon in this style for $60, just like the OG opening.
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The Caretaker @the-caretaker.bsky.social · 25/04/2025
Be careful, Dweller. With one foot in the future and one in the past, you must be mindful lest you receive a surprise cockshot from the present.
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The Caretaker @the-caretaker.bsky.social · 29/03/2025
Dweller, if you thought THIS was bad. Just wait until the Spirits are waking you up at 3am to whisper about The Horrors.
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Minrathous Dream Events @tevenedreamevents.bsky.social · 08/03/2025
Ooc: Tomorrow I will still answer any messages regarding the different characters in the venue! If you need Wonderment, the Waitstaff or Inspiration (The sketch artist) don't hesitate to let me know and tomorrow I'll check it out 🥰 Oh and in case someone doesn't know, I'm Viago's account too ☺️
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The Caretaker @the-caretaker.bsky.social · 07/03/2025
Be warned, Dwellers. Should anything go amiss due to your misconduct at the wedding... [The Caretaker clasps their hands over their hollow chest, peering out over the Fade as they trail off.]
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The Caretaker @the-caretaker.bsky.social · 07/03/2025
@itsmecole.bsky.social @bellara-lutare.bsky.social [The Caretaker arrives later than intended, but with gifts in tow] Newlyweds, who have found peace in their union and solace in the arms of their beloved... ... I bring Tupperware. For all your leftovers, snacks, and meal prepping.
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BioWare Problems @biowareproblems.bsky.social · 05/03/2025
If you made it through this, you can make it to Friday
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The Caretaker @the-caretaker.bsky.social · 02/03/2025
Dweller, the tides recede as the Spirits whisper of warmth and revelry... there's an island we must travel to... Margaritaville ....
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Maphel NSFW🔞 @maphel.bsky.social · 01/03/2025
✨ MARCH COMMISSIONS ARE NOW OPEN ✨ You can contact me here on bsky or email my work email (maphel.workemail@yahoo.com) I'm opening two slots for this month, and I'll quote this when they're filled.
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The Caretaker @the-caretaker.bsky.social · 25/02/2025
We learned nothing about NOT swallowing crystals...
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The Caretaker @the-caretaker.bsky.social · 20/02/2025
Blue Raspberry Slushie, save me. Save me, Blue Raspberry Slushie.
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Teia Cantori @andarateiacantori.bsky.social · 18/02/2025
🥰✨
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The Caretaker @the-caretaker.bsky.social · 15/02/2025
[OOC] // Apologies everyone :( I have to duck out for tonight. I have an opening shift tomorrow. Have fun!!! Ty Tarquin & Viper writers for the event <3 mwah mwah
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The Caretaker @the-caretaker.bsky.social · 15/02/2025
Perhaps I was mistaken: 500 hamburgers 500 fried fish sticks 100 plates of gold leaf painted Wyvern Fillets 100 plates of Grilled Rivaini Salmon A Salad Buffet bar with fresh vegetables and greens from Arlathan Forest And a Wedding Cake.
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The Caretaker @the-caretaker.bsky.social · 14/02/2025
My catering: 500 hamburgers from Culver's and 500 fried fish sticks from Hal's.
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The Caretaker @the-caretaker.bsky.social · 14/02/2025
Dweller, what day is it? Have I missed the Vipperquin wedding?
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Felassan @theslowarrow.bsky.social · 08/02/2025
If you can help my friend in any way, even just reskeeting this, please do~
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The Caretaker @the-caretaker.bsky.social · 08/02/2025
Dweller, would you still love me if I was a worm?
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The Caretaker @the-caretaker.bsky.social · 07/02/2025
Remember to stay up to date on your vaccinations, Dweller. Otherwise you'll get possessed by things like "Tuberculosis" and "COVID" and "The Flu".
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The Caretaker @the-caretaker.bsky.social · 07/02/2025
Are we certain, Dweller?
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The Caretaker @the-caretaker.bsky.social · 04/02/2025
Dweller, do you ever wonder what the hell was up with the Silent Hill franchise?
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SPITE. @spitefully.bsky.social · 01/02/2025
I SAID. FUCK. DA VENATORI. BUT. NOT. LIKE. THAT.
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⚷ @birdheartedgirl.bsky.social · 31/01/2025
like empathy compassion isn't selective but hate is
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✪ Beware the Gray Ghost ✪ @jongraywb.blacksky.app · 30/01/2025
If you have students who are trans no you don’t. If you have students of color who may be affected by ICE no you don’t. If anyone asks you gender or racial the makeup of your class you don’t have to tell them. Protect your class and protect your students by not complying in advance. They trust you.
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The Caretaker @the-caretaker.bsky.social · 31/01/2025
Not now, Dweller. Caretaker needs to huff a line to deal with the horrors.
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The Caretaker @the-caretaker.bsky.social · 31/01/2025
It is important to remember that the poor man has more in common with the hopeful immigrant than he does an arrogant king. Do not let them tell you otherwise, Dweller.
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The Caretaker @the-caretaker.bsky.social · 31/01/2025
Dweller, attempting to reason with fascists won't work. You must throw them off a balcony.
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anna ☄️🎧 @bastilas.bsky.social · 29/01/2025
ea/bioware's business strategy:
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David Gaider @davidgaider.bsky.social · 30/01/2025
I'll echo Mike here and highly recommend both Karin and Patrick to anyone looking for a fantastic and highly-experienced editor or writer, respectively. And, just once, I'd like to see a studio announce these kinds of layoffs without making it sound like a cheery plus for the company.
BlueSky posts by Karin West-Weekes and Patrick Weekes announcing their layoffs from BioWare. Both are now looking for work.
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SPITE. @spitefully.bsky.social · 30/01/2025
FUCK. ELECTRONIC. ARTS.
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The Caretaker @the-caretaker.bsky.social · 28/01/2025
// Apologies to everyone waiting. Not sure when I'll be getting back into it, i'm a little busy.
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The Caretaker @the-caretaker.bsky.social · 27/01/2025
// If you're into harassment campaigns pls block me. Button is right there. I do not want to deal with any of you.
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The Caretaker @the-caretaker.bsky.social · 27/01/2025
// "Blocked me for-" I blocked you for running a harassment campaign.
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The Caretaker @the-caretaker.bsky.social · 27/01/2025
// Reminder to the community at large we do not need to Dog pile. I got pissed too, and I understand everyone else also being furious, but there's a limit. +
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The Caretaker @the-caretaker.bsky.social · 27/01/2025
[BOOKMARKED FOR CONTINUATION TOMORROW.]
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The Caretaker @the-caretaker.bsky.social · 27/01/2025
// "This is about Star Wars" but then outright says shit about Teia. Get a load of this fucking wanker, holy hell.
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The Caretaker @the-caretaker.bsky.social · 27/01/2025
// Stopping the sillies and the funs for a second. When someone writes a character who isn't the same skin color as them, it does not make them racist. That's fucking ridiculous. Get your shit together.
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The Caretaker @the-caretaker.bsky.social · 26/01/2025
// Looks into the camera. Gives a weak thumbs up.
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